Posted in: Mr. Tito
Mr. Tito's PHAT WWE Hell in a Cell Pay Per View Review & Match Ratings
By Mr. Tito
Oct 26, 2014 - 10:58:31 PM

Follow Mr. Tito on Twitter.com: @titowrestling

Welcome to the WWE Hell in a Cell edition of Mr. Tito Strikes Back here on LordsofPain.net / WrestlingHeadlines.com. This review will simultaneously written as I watch the show and should be posted immediately as the show ends. Much more convenient for me than writing this column after I return from my friend's house. And this will be my official 16 year anniversary column, as I started writing for LoP 16 years ago on 10/26/1998. Big THANK YOU to you, the readers, for motivating me to keep this Tito train going and continued thanks to LordsofPain.net and Calvin Martin for allowing me to do this.

Now, onto HELL IN A CELL...

I enjoyed Paul Heyman's addition to the pre-game show. Heyman can make any segment compelling and worthwhile.

Odd Mizdow TV segment with Miz and Damien Sandow during the Pre-Game Show and it doesn't have me hyped for the United States Title match.

Bo Dallas vs. Mark Henry (Pre-Game)
Bo Dallas cut a hilarious promo on how he was now the new "World's Strongest Man" and how he was ashamed to be here because of his last name (Dallas). Not much of a match as Mark Henry squashed Bo Dallas in short fashion to nullify the 4 wins that Bo Dallas had over Henry. After the match, Bo Dallas proclaimed "I wasn't ready" and that Henry was a "cheater". 0-Stars for that complete jobbing of Bo Dallas.
WINNER: Mark Henry

Strange backstage promo with Paige and Alicia Fox... Alrighty then.

Fireworks, the pyro... Tough television night, as I'm giving up the new edition of the Walking Dead and Green Bay vs. New Orleans for this. When you don't own the WWE Network, you've got to watch it live at your friend's house when you can.

Opening Match - Intercontinental Title: Dolph Ziggler (c) vs. Cesaro - 2 out of 3 Falls
FINGER OF SHAME to the WWE for having the Intercontinental Title Champion come out FIRST and the challenger SECOND. Goes to show you how many non-wrestling personnel are now backstage that could care less about wrestling traditions. YES, I go there every time when this happens... Cesaro completely shaved his head for tonight. Back and forth to start, but holy cow, the GIANT SWING made its return! However, immediately after the the Giant Swing, Dolph Ziggler rolled up Cesaro for Pinfall #1. What the hell, WWE... 2nd fall had Cesaro selling an injury to his left arm, but then Cesaro shows ultimate strength by carrying Ziggler up the ropes and then hitting the Superplex off the top rope! Holy cow! Ziggler, however, quickly comes back and hits a Fameasser for a close 2 count only. Eventually, Ziggler would hit a combo of an armbreaker, superkick, and then Zig Zag to win Pinfall #2. Wow, 2 straight falls to Ziggler. The Cesaro destruction continues. This was a 14 minute 2 out of 3 falls, yikes...
WINNER: Dolph Ziggler
Rating: ***1/4

Backstage, we have the Authority chatting it up and Randy Orton wants Stephanie/HHH/Kane to tell Seth Rollins to stay away from his match tonight.

Loser becomes Personal Assistant: Nikki Bella vs. Brie Bella
I do enjoy how Nikki has retained the old Bella theme... Meanwhile, Brie Bella obtains God-awful music. OK, ladies, time to prove yourselves. With these 2 being sisters, they should be able to prepare a decent match here. Crowd is bored here... They hit a few decent moves here, like the Electric Chair Drop, but nothing too thrilling here. Brie Bella tries to get some heat with some odd chants, but it's the usual from here. Nice missile dropkick by Brie, along with the knee to face on Nikki that looked better on the replay. Nikki hit her backbreaker finisher but 2 count only. Rack Attack? That's what it's called, according to Michael Cole. Brie Bella eventually slaps on the YES! Lock, but Nikki escapes. Nikki hits a second Rack Attack (Nice Rack!) to get the win. Not bad. The issue is that this feud has been awful and the match had no heat. Now, Brie becomes Nikki's personal assistant for 30 days. Make her wipe your ass!
WINNER: Nikki Bella
Rating: **1/4

Funny how Paul Heyman being an analyst in between matches can draw major heat.

World Tag Titles: Goldust/Stardust (c) vs. Usos
WWE gets it right here, as Goldust/Stardust come out second because they are the defending champions. Tradition, yo... And speaking of tradition, I love seeing an actual tag match where both teams are wearing similar uniforms. Good back and forth action between the two TEAMS here. See what happens when you have wrestlers dedicated to tag team action? Everytime I watch him wrestle, I'm amazed at how talented Dustin Rhodes or Goldust really is at 45 years old. Goldust has the KISS effect in that wearing the make-up and costume keeps him looking younger than what he really is. Nothing too special in the match, but the finish was nice with a distracted referee that missed Stardust kicking one of the Usos into Goldust's finisher. GREAT ending!
WINNER: Goldust/Stardust
Rating: ***1/4

As I've said before, I'm NOT going to criticize the WWE for over-exposure on the Breast Cancer stuff because if helps save a few lives, I'm OK with it.

Hell in a Cell for #1 WWE Title Contendership: John Cena vs. Randy Orton
Quite cool that Rollins vs. Ambrose will headline this event. I'm loving that. John Cena mysteriously wears the black shorts tonight. As one of my buddies was insisting, Cena will join the NWO tonight! Typical Cena/Orton stuff for the first 10 minutes here. Orton tried the DDT through the ropes but Cena reversed that for a hiptoss through the ropes. Now, they're finally using the cage on the outside. A table and chair are brought into the ring as Orton nicely reverses the Attitude Adjustment after tossing the table and then he throws Cena into the corner with a chair. RKO out of no where, as Orton nailed Cena when Cena tried his shoulder block. 2 count only. Now, Cena gets tossed into the corner through the table. Steel steps are in the ring and the Viper wants to his an RKO on the steps... Cena countered and slammed Orton on the steps instead. My buddies were telling me that Orton has a legit back injury that might cause him to take significant time off? Herniated disc? Orton escapes the offensive onslaught with a nutshot. Orton tries for the punt but gets slapped in the STFU, but escapes... Cena on the offense and hits the Attitude Adjustment for a 2 count only. Cena tries to hit a second Attitude Adjustment, but Orton sneaks in an RKO OUT OF NO WHERE in mid air! Impressive... Cena, as we're seeing replays of the RKO, gets Orton up for the 2nd Attitude Adjustment and nails it. 2 count only! Cena brings in a table as WWE Network FREEZES on us for a brief second... Nooooooo! But we're back soon and Cena puts Orton on the table and climbs the ropes. Orton gets up and hits Cena on the top rope. "RKO" chants are occurring... Randy tried an RKO from the top rope and onto the table, but John Cena reversed that for an Attitude Adjustment off the top rope and onto the table. Yikes, Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena #4 coming your way, folks...
WINNER: John Cena
Rating: ****

Afterward, Cena taunts Paul Heyman... I still insist that Randy Orton presents the better match-up for Brock Lesnar, let alone being a unique first time match between the 2.

Takis advertisement? Really?

Backstage, Mark Henry tries to pump up Big Show.

United States Title: Sheamus (c) vs. Miz
Miz comes down first... Good, the WWE is getting it right on Champions coming out 2nd on Sheamus and Goldust/Stardust, but why disrespect Dolph Ziggler? Sheamus tries his Kick off the start, but Miz ducks. Damien Sandow is killing me with the outside Stunt Double stuff. This match is something you'd see on RAW and only Sandow's efforts at ringside are keeping me interested. Crowd is dead until a "Mizdow's Awesome" chant breaks out. Sandow tries some referee distractions and Miz almost won with the Skull Crusher. When Miz tried to come off the top, he took Sheamus's Kick to the face to lose the match. Damien Sandow sneaks in the ring and acts knocked out as well. Sheamus sees an opportunity to have some fun and makes Miz do funny stuff, like an actual "YMCA" chant and instead of helping out, Damien Sandow imitates Miz as a loyal stunt double.
WINNER: Sheamus
Rating: **1/2

Backstage, Brie Bella is carrying Nikki Bella's bags and makes Nikki a smoothie. In true Vince McMahon booking fashion with hilarity (not), Nikki dumps the smoothie on Brie's head. Har har... We really have 30 days of this, right?

And now, the WWE re-airs the soldier attack from Rusev. What a joke that segment was and it was a new low for the WWE.

Big Show vs. Rusev
Pretty in pink tonight for Lana... Early on, Rusev is working on the knee which is how you should attack any larger wrestler that has the advantage known as "higher ground". Rusev hits an impressive suplex on the Big Show! Nicely done! Ouch! Big Show slapped on a painful submission which could become a regular finisher for Big Show. Oh wait, he has 1 punch that can knockout anybody... Why doesn't he go for the punch immediately? Suddenly, Big Show can run around the ring despite the "leg injury". Uh oh, Mark Henry comes down to the ring, as many were predicting a heel turn. Rusev kicks out of the freakin' Chokeslam, which beat many wrestlers back in the day. Rusev drills some nice kicks on both Big Show and Mark Henry, and a second to Big Show. Accolade submission on Big Show and Show submits. Nice match and beats my expectations. Strong win for Rusev and he needed this clean win badly for his career. WWE management has to be happy with the execution of that match and it should help solidify Rusev's push towards Wrestlemania 31 for a reported match against John Cena.
WINNER: Rusev
Rating: ***1/2

Backstage, Dean Ambrose talks crazy...

Divas Title: AJ Lee (c) vs. Paige
Well, back to the disrespect as AJ Lee, the champion, came out first. Why, WWE, why? Go watch your video library and see what tradition shows. I guess when you're married to CM Punk, disrespect can happen... At this point, no matter how good this match could appear, we're just waiting until Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins in the cage. Paige dominated much of the early part of the match and then AJ made a comeback. Good question raised by my friends: why can't this be a Hell in a Cell match? Have females ever been in a match of that sort? Nice reversal of a submission and into a Fallaway Slam by Paige. On the outside, as Paige and AJ fight on the barricade, I'm impressed by the Bray Wyatt and Mankind costumes worn by fans. Back in, AJ Lee gets the win via Black Widow submission. Good match...
WINNER: AJ Lee
Rating: ***

Afterward, Paige turns on Alicia Fox...

Hell in a Cell: Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins
I'm in shock that the WWE made this the main event, but I commend them for it... Dean Ambrose walks down to the ring with a Kendo Stick in a holder and throws multiple chairs in the ring ahead of time. Uh oh... Then, Dean Ambrose steps out of the cage and proclaims "we're all going to die tonight" and then climbs to the top of the Cell! Seth Rollins comes down with the Stooges 2014 (Joey Mercury, Jamie Noble). Mercury and Noble beg Rollins to not climb so Rollins insists that both Noble/Mercury to "go get him". Noble and Mercury climb the Cell and both take beatings with a Kendo stick as that distracts Ambrose enough to allow Rollins to sneak attack on top of the cage. Noble/Mercury hold Ambrose down as Rollins beats him with the stick. Rollins insists that Mercury/Noble "throw him off", but Ambrose fights them off and hits a suplex on Noble. Ouch. Now, both Rollins and Ambrose are slowly climbing down from the side and just above the announcer tables. Spanish announcers back up, but both guys fall and destroy BOTH announcer tables. SOLID OAK TABLES! Now, both sell the Medical Attention. Nice spot, but damn, I'm so desensitized after seeing much worse table spots in my life. Ambrose gets up first and pulls Rollins away from his physicians and takes him to the Cell. Referee locks the door and we finally have our match.

Ambrose yells "you stabbed me in the back you son of a bitch" and destroys Rollins with a bunch of chairshots. All offense from Ambrose, so far, and that's good psychology. Ambrose FINALLY has Rollins to himself after months of being eluded. Revenge is a dish best served cold, baby! Rollins gets on the offense, however, and hits Ambrose with a backdrop on the chair. Now, a table gets pulled out by Rollins but Rollins takes an elbow through it for a very nice spot. Ambrose starts to grate Rollins with the fencing and then Kane makes his appearance by spraying Ambrose with a fire extinguisher. That's inventive... Rollins then hits Ambrose through a table with a powerbomb! Back in the ring, the Curb Stomp finisher is unable to finish Ambrose. It's a night of finisher kickouts, baby! Rollins on the attack with the chair and then positions the Money in the Bank briefcase under Ambrose's head for the Curb Stomp. It fails and Ambrose destroys Rollins with a clothesline. Ambrose pulls out a pair of cinderblocks but the lights go dark and weird language is overheard... Then, a lantern is in the ring and Bray Wyatt attacks Dean Ambrose. Seth Rollins gets the pin. What the hell?!? That was so random and unexplained while screwing EVERYBODY out of a legit finish to Ambrose vs. Rollins. We've waited forever for this match-up and it's ruined by God awful booking. The Buzzards will be circling the WWE if they don't fix their idiotic Creative Team.
WINNER: Seth Rollins
Rating: ****1/4

LAST WORD: Damn good Pay Per View for the second straight month, as I enjoyed Night of Champions and I liked Hell in a Cell as well. This was a night that helped advance several newer stars while producing well from the match-ups. I'm disappointed, though, in the Hell in a Cell finish as Bray Wyatt's interference was so random and it ruined the serious potential of Rollins/Ambrose getting close to "Match of the Year". Dumb, dumb, dumb ending with Bray Wyatt's attack and I believe fans will reject it. They want Ambrose vs. Rollins and not a distraction to get away from that match-up. B+ for the show, but maybe an "F" for the Wyatt ending to ruin the Rollins/Ambrose match-up.

SO JUST CHILL... 'TIL THE NEXT EPISODE!

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