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I am currently running a column writing seminar/competition with Super Chrisss and Mr. Tito in the feeder system for our main page column writers - the LOP Columns Forum. We just wrapped up week 1 and, as a reward for his #1 ranking among the eight writers involved, I present to you a column by Tim R. Be on the look out for other columns from the finest of our up-and-comers in the coming weeks. -Doc  If there’s one thing I like to do on the Unsanitary Truth Sauce, its point out facts so face-smackingly obvious that not even the WWE doctors would pass you from an ImPACT concussion test by the time you’re done reading. Okay, that, and bad mouth the current WWE writers. Oh, and ruining the way you watch television. But the facts part is a very strong third place. We’re going to answer the question, “Does our voice actually matter?” Everyone’s a Narcissist It doesn’t matter who you are, you’re a narcissist. You don’t have to take my word for it because you can see for yourself by just clicking on any headline on LordsofPain.net and reading through the comments section. You won’t be able to swing a dead Paige's career without hitting a comment that sounds like “Wrestler X needs to stop doing this thing [because I don’t like it!],” or “WWE should do more of this thing [because I love it!].” Of course, you’ll never see that part in the brackets make it into our actual comments, because no one likes to admit that they’re that level of narcissistic, but they are. We all are. You are the Underdog of Your Own Story I challenge you to think of a single situation in your life that you don’t consider a “You vs. THE MACHINE” scenario. You can’t. Right now in this very moment you want to be the best at something, better than someone else, or pass a class, a test, a sport, or maybe you just flat out hate your boss, principal, government, policy, pimp, or whatever. Whatever the situation may be, you’re the underdog. Because we like to view ourselves as underdogs, we love a good underdog story. As a narcissist, it is impossible to imagine your situation from the point of view of anyone else. Unless, of course, someone makes you believe you're the key to someone else's story. Cue the “Yes!” Movement The entire “Yes!” Movement was a storyline, so don’t kid yourself thinking we had any control over it, because we didn’t. If the WWE didn’t want us chanting “Yes,” they simply would have taken the chant away and let it die. We don’t have to look any further than Cesaro and his swing for proof of that. The real question isn’t whether or not it was a storyline because it emphatically was. The real question is why did everyone believe it wasn’t? Why did people think their voice suddenly had power now despite years of the contrary? You’re Daniel Bryan’s Character The funny thing about thinking of ourselves as underdogs is that we tend to latch onto other underdogs. It’s why we enjoy movies about underdogs, and believe me, every movie is about underdogs. We wanted Daniel Bryan to win the World title because we were 100% sure he wasn’t ever really going to. It was us against the MAN once again. You don’t have to believe me. Follow the feud. Who was Daniel Bryan? The underdog. Who was Triple H? The MAN. Here’s where it gets deeper. Why was there a segment where Daniel Bryan called the fans to the ring to fight the MAN? Was it because our voice suddenly mattered, or was the WWE making us the underdog babyfaces against the MAN? Here’s a hint: You’re fat. Also, the answer to the question is that the WWE manipulated everyone. Why did the video package of Daniel Bryan versus Triple H for Wrestlemania focus so much on the FANS getting behind Daniel Bryan instead of how good Daniel Bryan actually was? It was so glaringly obvious and yet you’d be surprised how many people still to this day believe they did it. Google it. There are people out there who still believe their voice put Daniel Bryan in the main event. If your voice mattered, we wouldn’t be talking about Daniel Bryan. We’d be talking about how great those Zack Ryder World Champion Edition WWE Ice Cream Bars tasted. Instead, enjoy your Booty-Os you didn't ask for. We Are Daniel Bryan's Struggle The blurred lines came from the way Stephanie and Triple H were talking down to Daniel Bryan. They called him a B+ player, commented on his height, his appearance, and his skills. The whole time they did it, we imagined that was probably their real life opinion of Bryan. Don’t lie, you did it, too. We all did it. We all thought what we were seeing on the screen ran parallel to how the MAN in charge of the WWE felt about Daniel Bryan. We used words like “degrading,” “reality,” and worse, “burying.” We felt like the MAN was talking down to us. Meanwhile, in the real world, Daniel Bryan was sitting down with Triple H and discussing what was going to be said and done prior to RAW even airing. Daniel Bryan okayed the idea of being criticized for his looks because he knew we could relate. We knew that was how the WWE worked, and yet because we could relate so much we chose to believe it was all really how the WWE thought of Daniel Bryan. Even though the machine was pushing him hard as the people’s champion right in front of us, we honestly believed it was an uphill battle for him and he needed our help to get to the top. There is Good News You don’t get to tell a TV show what you want, let alone a billion dollar company. That would be silly. Asking you what you want in order to make you happy is Mom and Pop levels of amateur. The company gives you something and tells you that you want it through levels of psychology so boring that when I went to research it for this column I woke up a week later and James Ellsworth was a signed WWE superstar. What reality did I wake up in? But don’t worry. Your voice may not have done what you think it did, but there is something it did do. You didn’t get to tell the WWE what you wanted, but you did tell the WWE what you didn’t want. During the whole feud with Daniel Bryan and Triple H, another feud was happening between Randy Orton and Dave Batista for the WWE championship. The fans did not care. The whole focus was going to Daniel Bryan and is midcard feud, which was not the intentions of the WWE. Once the WWE realized you didn’t want Batista vs. Orton and weren’t willing to pay for a PPV headlined by them, that is when the WWE went back to the well and pulled up Daniel Bryan. That’s because there is a clear and precise difference between “I like it,” “I don’t like it,” and “I don’t care.” That’s Why Roman Reigns is Still a Main Eventer You may think that what you’re saying by booing Roman Reigns is “I don’t like this guy,” but what you’re really saying is, “I care enough to feel one way or another about this guy.” There’s that word care again, you sympathetic hero. Daniel Bryan wasn’t over because you cheered for him, Daniel Bryan was over because everyone cared about him. So why do we care so much about Roman Reigns, yet we boo him the second he comes out? Is it because he’s tall, strong, fast, explosive, ridiculously good looking (call me, maybe?), and always coming out on top? Holy crap, is it because he’s not an underdog despite how hard the WWE tries to portray him as one? You got it. So no, your voice doesn’t matter. If you really truly didn’t care about something, you’d be taking a pee break any time he came out, not booing mercifully. You want to boo because you want to believe you’re the underdog against the WWE’s machine. You control the WWE, not them, right? Don’t worry; you’re not doing anything wrong. You’re doing exactly what the WWE wanted you to do. You’re getting involved. You’re only getting the impression that the underdog is winning. The great news is that there’s nothing wrong with that. So go out there and boo Roman Reigns or don’t. It doesn’t matter. Because silence is your real voice. Use it wisely. When I'm not destroying the way you watch wrestling, I'm lurking around Twitter at @UnsanitaryTimR. Follow me on Twitter as I take Unsanitary Truth Sauce to new limits via YouTube and Lords of Pain Columns Forum. I'm also taking orders for logos, banners, and signatures. Just PM me what you want. 
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