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Submitted by Vince Migliore on Thursday, August 30, 2001 at 4:53 PM EST
 What's up Bizntiches?!? Notice how I used the word biznitches instead of bitches. It wouldn't be a humorous comment if I called all you readers a bunch of bitches. Granted it's not really funny either way, but do you have a suggestion for an intro? Well then email it to me instead of keeping it to yourself. Got a DVD review this week so those are always enjoyable to read (or so I've been told). Even if you don't have a DVD player read it anyway so when you get one you'll know what to buy! Well that's a good enough intro isn't it? Yeah that's what I thought. Table Of Contents I - Short Comments on Debatable Issues A - Royal Rumble in Atlanta B - Excess is an Excess C - MECW not gonna be #2 D - The TNN Buzz II - Keeping An Eye Open III - Main Topic - What makes a 5 star match? IV - Question Of The Week V - DVD Review - UFC Hits 1 VI - My Wrestling Wish List VII - Closing Comments Short Comments on Debatable Issues Royal Rumble in Atlanta I know 90% of you don't care because you don't live in Atlanta so you can feel free to skip to the next section if you already have not. Yesterday when I found out the Royal Rumble was going to be here in Atlanta I was extremely happy. I know for the past few weeks I have been hoping for Wrestlemania to come to Atlanta, but Royal Rumble is the second best PPV to go to in my opinion. I know a lot of people hate Battle Royals, but there is just something about the Royal Rumble that is so awesome. I think it's the whole unpredictability factor that makes it so fun to watch. This is the first WWF PPV to be in Georgia and I WILL get tickets no matter what. The event has been booked for the Phillips Arena, and not the Georgia Dome because I don't think they want to show up WrestleMania, which is only 2 months after the Rumble, by having a larger crowd at the Rumble. Readers of the Phat Pharm may know that I've been to every Raw that has been held in Atlanta and how great of a time I had at them so I can only imagine how great seeing a PPV live will be. Excess is an Excess You probably just skipped the last section because you could care less about Atlanta. I don't blame ya so I'll just get on with it. Ok let me first admit before I go on that I did not catch Excess. I had to work till Midnight (at good ol' Blockbuster} and forgot to tape it. I read the recap of the show and some reviews and the impression I got from these is that this show is a waste of airtime. Seriously I don't understand the point of having calls that are just full of fluff such as "Are you going to join the Alliance when you come back?" They should let the "smart marks" call in and fire some questions at the wrestlers. I can understand some questions would just be inappropriate like "Why didn't you want to do the job to so-and-so?" However a question about how working with a certain wrestler is or a question about their past in wrestling should definitely be allowed. Judging from the rating it received it looks like not too many people are interested in this show. The reason this topic is called Excess is an Excess is because another 2-hour show of wrestling is just too much. Granted they took off Livewire and Superstars, but those were a bit different from this show. I will be taping this week's episode, being I have to work again, and give a better verdict on the show. I doubt I will be able to change my mind but who knows? MECW Not Going to Be #2 Word spread extremely fast about the Indy promotion MECW (Main Event Championship Wrestling), and how it was going to be the new number 2 company in wrestling. I sat back and let people rant and rave about how great this company was going to be while all along I knew it was going to be another tragic story of an Indy promoter who cant run a promotion. This past weekend the foundation started to crumble a little bit more on MECW as this past weekend many wrestlers were stranded at the airport because their plane tickets were not paid for. Owner John Collins said the tickets were cancelled, but in fact they were set on reserve and never paid for. This is not the first time this has happened as there are two other ticket agents owed money for processed plane tickets. It's not only plane tickets but also wrestlers paychecks have not been coming in when they are supposed to. It sure sound a lot like ECW at the end of it's run. More interesting than all of this is a quote taken directly from an interview with John Collins over at 1wrestling.com "I haven't slept well for weeks, I've had chest pains, I'm puking up blood, I've lost 25 lbs in three weeks, there's just so much about all of this that I don't understand. It's killing me. I've discovered I'm not any good at this. In fact, as far as running a wrestling company I pretty much suck." The same promoter who weeks before many people were saying could give Vince McMahon a run for his money. Wait folks I'm not done yet there's more. During one of the shows it was announced that a few of the wrestlers wouldn't be appearing because of flight delays. This made the crowd unruly and to be calmed down they were told that if they brought their ticket stub to the next show they could get in for free. Coliseum Superintendent Mark Acker said, "He can tell people they can get in for free if he wants to, but somebody is going to pay us the price of a ticket for everybody that walks through the door. We had hoped we had found a company that would be able to help us do something good for the community, but we have been lied to and deceived." If that wasn't enough Collins blamed Paul Heyman himself on the canceling of the plane tickets. How friggin ridiculous is this? Now I'm not saying everyone who thought this company would succeed is dumb because there are a lot of promotions out there that could be big, but from the beginning I didn't like the way this company was being run. From what I understand ownership will be turned over of the company, but as they say too little too late. The TNN Buzz Ok what the hell is that buzzing noise on TNN? I know I'm not the only one who hears it because I've seen reports from many people in many different areas of the US complaining of this crap. The first night I heard it I thought it was just some idiot in the arena with an air horn or something. Then as the next few weeks went on I knew it couldn't be the same dumb bastard with an air horn, but it had to be TNN. I know this has very little to do with wrestling, but I just had to get it off my chest. I like to watch RAW without distractions, and when a god awful buzzing noise takes over my TV and makes me want to shoot myself that is a distraction. All I can say is thank goodness I don't watch anything else on TNN or I'd go insane. Keeping An Eye Open Keep an eye open for these things this week in wrestling 1. Matches announced for Unforgiven 2. Angle to try and get his medals back 3. Something done with the tag titles since Kane is injured (tourney?) 4. Edge to cause Christian a match (It just seems logical since Christian has been costing Edge a bunch of matches and Edge not really getting mad about it. Edge will cost Christian a match and he will flip out.) 5. Undertaker gets a new feud 6. Smackdown! airs Live next Tuesday instead of Thursday 7. Shane Helms copies another "Superhero" 8. Saturn gets closer to finding Moppy. (yeah I don't care either) 9. Vince to return to TV….maybe Main Topic - What Makes A 5-Star Match? When rating a wrestling match the star system is normally used. 0 stars would be your worst match possible and 5 star would be the best possible match. There is really no set formula for what makes a match a 5 star match. Basically it all comes down to personal opinion. A lot of people like ultra-violent matches while other prefer the more technical type of match. I'm going to basically go over all the conditions that need to come together in order for a match to be 5 star. My first condition a lot of people may not agree is a must for a 5 star match, but I think it's extremely important. This condition is build-up. I want a match to be hyped for at least a few weeks. The seeds are planted for some of the greatest feuds in wrestling months before the match actual happens. Now I'm not saying that a match has to be hyped for months in order for it to be good, but a buildup like that will definitely have you wanting to see that match. Lets use Austin Vs Rock from Wrestlemania 17. The buildup (although maybe not obvious) started at Armageddon. The point is if you build a match strong enough the people will be dying to see it, and it will make it that much better. My second is work rate. I cant really emphasis this one enough and its pretty much self-explanatory. You can tell if someone is trying their hardest to make a match good. Their bumps look believable, their selling their ass off, and they are just intense the whole time through. Then you got the guys whose punches just look like crap and they wont sell. This will almost always take a match down many notches. Work rate hasn't really been a problem as of late because with only one company if you don't work hard your replaceable. Thirdly a hot crowd is important for a successful match. Of course if a crowd is dead it will not automatically make a match crappy, but it doesn't help. However if a match is stuck on 4 ½ stars a hot crowd will bring it over the top to the 5 star mark. The reason a hot crowd is so important is because it gets the guys in the ring excited and they start working harder. Plus it just gets you into the match when you see that the crowd is into it. Psychology is my fourth condition that has to be met in order for a mach to be 5 stars. This is the one that normally causes a match to be not as great as it could be. To give a simple summary of psychology let me give you this example. If I'm working on your arm the whole match you should be selling your arm the whole match. When you make your comeback and try to bodyslam me logic says you shouldn't be able to because I've been working on your damn arm the whole match! A lot of guys like to make believe they are SuperMan when they wrestle, but that's just not the case. There is a lot more to psychology than selling, but that is just the basics of it. Finally the part that I would say is the most important is the finish. I've seen plenty of great matches that are ruined by terrible finishes. I'm sorry but I don't want to see two guys beating the crap out of each other for 30 minutes then one guy gets DQ'd. It seems that the WWF does a lot of anti-climactic finishes. What I mean by this is two guys will be wrestling their ass off for 20 or 30 minutes then after a chairshot the guy gets pinned. I'm sorry but a match should be built to the finish and the finish should make sense. One example I can give of an anti-climactic finish is from No Way Out 2000 Foley Vs HHH. Foley falls through the ring and kicks out. Then instead of forming a comeback he gets pedigreed and pinned. All I ask is that the finish makes sense, and ends the match on a high note. These are just one mans thought on what makes a good match. Like I said before everyone has his or her own thoughts on this so these were mine. I'd love to hear what you think a 5 star match is so just email me and let me know. Question Of The Week Last week I asked "Do you have a PPV viewing ritual?" Judging from the response I got from this question I guess the answer to this question is no! However Josh did have a nice response for this question. "There are a few different things i do while watching a ppv. Sometimes I go to a friends house and sit around with a bunch of other people and watch it like. that. I think its more fun with people wacthing ppvs. I like to watch weekly shows by myself though. other times i just sit at home laying on the couch watching with my brother. there have been times i've thrown ppv parties like for a wrestlemania or summerslam. i get like 6 or 7 people over and we watch and talk about wrestling. any way i do it though its cool because i get to watch my favorite sport of all time. " This week I want to know what you consider match of the year so far and why. Send all responses to NYYanks24@mediaone.net and I'll post a few of them here next week. DVD Review - UFC Hits 1 The DVD I am going to review today is UFC Hits Volume 1. This DVD basically showcases all the best knockouts/tapouts in UFC history. The DVD doesn't get into the last two years of UFC,but does have some classic clips from some good fights. I'm not going to go over every fight on the DVD,but here are a list of some of the ones that stand out. Telia Tuli Vs Gerard Gordeau. The first UFC fight ever, and one of the shortest. One big kick to the face and it was over. Remco Pardoel Vs Orlando Weit Remco wins after repeated elbows Emmanuel Yarborough Vs Keith Hackney Emmanuel is 600 lbs and slams keith through the door of the cage. Very pathetic it seemed Keith didn't have anything but a punch. Royce Gracie Vs Kimo After years of watching Royce Gracie fights I have learned that it is extremely dumb to fight in a gui(sp?) otherwise known as a karate uniform. Why you may ask? Cause the damn thing gets ripped off almost every single time. When the gui is this loose it constricts movement a lot. Anyway this was a pretty exciting fight. For the first few years of UFC it was considered the best. Royce pulls a tap out of nowhere from an armbar. Dan Severn Vs Anthony Macias Nice German suplexes that look brutal by Severn in this fight. Severn gets the win after a pretty good looking choke. Andy Anderson Vs John Hess This thing was like a drunken bar fight. Hess wins but it wasn't a pretty fight what so ever. John Matua Vs Tank Abbott A mauling by Tank. If Tank can get you in the first minute or two with his hammer like shots then he'll beat you more times than not, but if you can last more than two minutes then you'll win because Tank has no Stamina at all. Paul Herrara Vs Gary Goodridge I think Gary Goodridge is a scary scary man. This fight lasted about twenty seconds. Herrara tried to get Gary in a crucifix position on the mat and Gary just elbowed the poor bastard until he was knocked out. Mark Hall Vs Koji Kitao Part of the David Vs Goliath contest. Hall was giving up at least 150lbs and 6 inches. A very weird event when Koji breaks his nose and doesn't want to continue. Don Frye Vs Amaury Bitetti I've seen many Don Frye fights and they are all pretty much the same. Frye just wears you down on the mat and constantly gives you blows to the back of the head. This fight was no different. Mark Coleman Vs Don Frye Mark Coleman is also very very scary. Frye took a hell of a lot of punishment, but never gave up. The ref had to stop it, and this was Mark Coleman's first win in UFC. Scott Ferrozzo Vs Tank Abbott UH OH This fight went to overtime. How did it get to overtime you might ask? Well the guy Tank is fighting was in worse shape than Tank. The last few minutes of the fight was just both guys sucking wind. The decision went to the judges and Ferrozzo won. Tank Abbott Vs Steve Nelmark One of the sickest looking knockouts Ive seen. Abbott hit Nelmark by the fence and Nelmark just collapsed on the fence. Its hard to explain, but Nelmark looked like he died right there against the fence Don Frye Vs Tank Abbott From the Ultimate Ultimate '96 the finals. I had never seen this fight before and Tank looked like he was going to knock out Frye. After a slip by Tank Frye got the tap out. Tra Tellingmon Vs Vitor Belfort Vitor has some of the quickest hands in MMA. He definatly showed it in this fight,but got the win from a tap-out. Guy Mezger Vs Tito Ortiz Not a very long match which surprised me. Both of these guys are awesome and definitely two of the best in UFC. After a picture perfect Guillotine Choke Mezger wins. Randy Couture Vs Vitor Belfort This was Belforts first loss. Going into the match both men were undefeated. In the end Randy's striking power overwhelmed Belfort Frank Shamrock Vs Kevin Jackson Uh did this match even happen. Literally Shamrock pulled the submission out of nowhere getting Jackson to tap. 17 seconds was the length of this fight. Frank Shamrock Vs Igor Zinoviev (See above) The Extras Interview W/ Frank Shamrock And Tito Ortiz This is the interview that took place before their classic match in the middle of the octagon. Basically just a bunch of trash talk, but pretty cool Multi-Camera Fight A really terrible fight that you can change the camera angle to three different types. Nothing special Promos The first one is an eight minute introduction to UFC. If you have never seen UFC before this explains all the rules, and gives a brief history. If you had any questions about what UFC is or how fights go then this is a great reference tool. The Second is a commercial from the PPV where Tito Ortiz and Frank Shamrock fought. Pretty neat to see. The Final Verdict The first hour of this DVD reminded me why I didn't become a fan of UFC until about four or five years ago. When it began in 1992 it was terrible. They were letting anyone in the ring including Sumo wrestlers. I understand that the whole point of UFC is to determine which style of fighting is best,but I could of told you that a Sumo wrestler was going to lose to a grappler. The second hour,however, reminded me why I became a fan with all the great fights with Coleman,Frye,Abbot,and Shamrock. I do wish that there were more complete matches on this DVD instead of just clips, but that's not what the DVD is about. If it wasn't for that second hour and that promo explaining UFC I probably would have given this thing a poor, but because I liked the second hour so much I'm giving it a GOOD. If your video store has it to rent pick it up and give it a try. UFC Hits Volume 2 has come out so I will review that in the future. My Wrestling Wishlist Things I wish would happen in wrestling soon 1. Little Guido would get signed by WWF 2. Mark Henry makes his wrestling comeback 3. Ric Flair gets signed by WWF 4. They change the Royal Rumble venue to GA Dome instead of Phillips 5. Josh wins Tough Enough 6. WWF gives Dean Malenko some sort of retirement honor that he deserves 7. Tag Team division is given some sort of direction 8. Womens title is completely dropped 9. HBK returns for one more match **************** Alright well I'm done for this week. All I have to say is I'm tired as its 11:23 and I have to get up at 6 in the morning. Questions,Comments,Suggestions,etc should all be sent to my email addy NYYanks24@mediaone.net I will reply. Till next week I'm Vince Migliore saying don't rent Joe Dirt cause it sucks………..thank you
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