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Submitted by XanMan on Friday, September 19, 2008 at 9:49 AM EST
 With XanMan and aisce Hello boys and girls, and welcome to ETA. In our first Main Page edition, Jeff Hardy, Batista, and the difference between indies and the WWF, but we start with Sting. How in the world does he get a one-on-one World Title shot without wrestling a match in months when Angle, Christian, and Booker T had to earn shots into a 4-way dance? Isn't this just one more example of TNA being TNA? Unhappily, I think this is really a case of 'wrestler with big ego and absurd contract' being 'wrestler with a big ego and absurd contract'. Sting did not join TNA at the age of 146 to play second fiddle to the likes of Christian; he joined to be the big fish in the small pond and make a lot of money. Both of these factors come into play when this kind of booking decision is made: his 'star status' determines that he gets regular title shots, and the fact that TNA are paying him a ridiculous amount of money means that they will try and recoup some of it by hoping to cash in on his marquee name in the main event. That said, this is wholly characteristic of TNA in that these occurrences trickle down through the card: Sting gets it easier than the ex-WWE contingent, who in turn are pushed over what are (mostly incorrectly) termed the 'home grown' talent. All of that is true, of course, but you're speaking of the behind the scenes reasons, whereas I'm talking about what we see on television. What I'm talking about is TNA once again failing to be consistent with the way things are done on the show. Booker T, Rhyno, Christian Cage, and Kurt Angle are all former TNA World Champions. AJ Styles is the only double Triple Crown Champion in TNA history--and the other two guys that did that once was pretty much on a lark of an angle. Kevin Nash arguably was once a bigger star than Sting ever was. Yet, these six men had one-on-one matches to see who got into the incredibly stupidly named "4 Ways to Glory" match at No Surrender. Sting, on the other hand, has been reverse ddting Styles and Samoa Joe, and making speeches; neither of which should give him a title shot. Make no mistake, I'm all for a Joe/Sting feud--especially if it helps to bring about a Millionair Club type of angle that finally puts the young talent on top, I just don't think it should be for the title. Wouldn't the proper way to book this match have been to have Sting cost Joe the title and Cage be the beneficiary? I honestly think it insults the fan's intelligence for Sting to be wrestling for the strap, but I have another reason: Sting vs. Joe is HUGE--it doesn't need a title, and they could easily give themselves two main events. Damn. I forgot to take my blue pill of backstage forgetfulness. *Gulp* . . . ok . . . Sting is Sting: he has face paint and corresponding quasi-supernatural powers, naturally he should get a title shot and . . . ah, who am I kidding, of course the logic is skewed. Wait . . . did you say that Nash was arguably a bigger star? My drug consumption really is inadequate. I have complete confidence that if I were to assign you the topic for the IWC Debate Team that Kevin Nash was at times in his career a bigger star than Sting has ever risen to, you'd win. Jeff Hardy appears to be back in the position in which he would have been after Wrestlemania if he hadn't failed a Wellness Test. Is this a good move on the WWF's part or too soon? Yes, I think he is on his way to reclaim his former place, and that is as it should be. The penalties for failing the 'Wellness' (nasty, bastard word, that) test are clear: 30 day suspension, 60 day suspension, then das boot. Nowhere is it written that 'thou shalt be de-pushed upon return', and indeed such a move would be counter-productive, depriving a wrestler of motivation to get back and the WWE of someone who can perform well in their erstwhile spot. Hardy is undeniably over and to hold him down would simply punish both him and the WWE themselves beyond the prescribed extent. Of course it isn't written that a depush is necessary, but it does seem to be good business sense. One doesn't want to have another Rob Van Dam situation on one's hands, does one? However, I do agree that it's time to push Hardy back towards the top--it's been almost 6 months since his suspension ended, and there've been no further instances, so why not give him another chance? I wouldn't even mind him beating Triple H at No Mercy, but I don't really expect it to happen. Trips appears to have a vise grip on that championship. BTW, I'm typing this as I watch RAW, and it took the Smackdown Rebound for me to remember that Kozlov attacked Hardy after the match. Excellent booking, that. Ah the SmackDown rebound: very necessary whenever a recollection of Kozlov is required. Something the audience can understand and appreciate right there, which is more than can be said for jokes about the Lehman Brothers' collapse. Um...who? New tag team, currently in WWE developmental, consisting of Teddy Hart and Brian Christopher. They collapse . . . a lot. Hence the name. Waitaminute! Teddy Hart is back in WWF's developmental system? Which means we could still have a new Hart Foundation...yet, we don't? Why does God hate me? I think it's more to do with the fact that everyone hates Teddy. From a wrestler who always gets a strong reaction, to one who has mostly struggled with this aspect of the profession. Charlie Haas is now being given a modicum of notice from the WWE audience. Is this proof that there is a gimmick for every wrestler, even those previously thought incapable of inspiring a decent pop? No. I don't think any gimmick is going to get Paul Burchill over, if the pirate one couldn't. I think Jamie Noble is a fantastic wrestler, but I don't think he's ever going to get a decent pop, either. And those are just two guys off the top of my head. On the Indies, those guys would be stars, but for the WWF audience they are always going to be third rate. Or, I could be wrong--look in the position The Major Brothers are in now. Burchill, in every sense of the term, was a huge star in the sadly pathetic world of British indy wrestling; Noble is a well-regarded former RoH champion. Jeff Hardy was greeted with a vehement hatred usually reserved for baby-killers when he appeared in RoH, and 'the other one' from MNM was scarcely better received. Do you think that the audience for indy and mainstream wrestling thatdifferent in its preferences, or are there all kinds of snobbery at work here? Oh, it's hugely different. It wasn't the classic wrestling style of WCW that propelled wrestling to mainstream, despite having the benefits of being broadcast at stable times on national cable stations, it was the circus-style atmosphere that Vince McMahon supported with his WWF. I do think there's something to the snobbery aspect, though, on both sides. WWF fans don't generally believe someone of the size of Jamie Noble could be any good and indy fans don't generally believe that someone who has wrestled the WWF style can be any good. Kind of ridiculous when you think about it, but that's pretty much why despite the abundance of talent in ROH I only think 3 guys there would excel in the WWF: McGuinness, Steen, and Hero. McGuinness and Hero for sure. Steen wouldn't last five minutes with his 'I use finishers as normal moves' moveset. Claudio would be a good fit, and only isn't in the WWE right now because of work permit issues (or so says teh interwebz), and I can't let this discussion slip by without mentioning the Human Tornado: hands down the most entertaining performer I have seen in a long time. Meanwhile, tubby, goofy-banged (I refer to his hair, not a sexual encounter with the cartoon dog) Morishima had a couple of dark matches in the WWE and was pictured shaking hands with Cena. The oracle that is internet gossip (again) reports that the WWE reaction was rather negative, due to Morishima's unique take on what a conditioned athlete should look like. What goes on? Have they seen JBL recently? Well, Morishima's in worse shape than JBL, but he's also infinitely better in-ring, so that probably all balances out. I suppose that means they won't try to sign Joe when his contract is up, too? Ridiculous. Good call on Castagnoli, somehow I spaced him. Steen would have to learn the WWF style, of course, but I imagine that Vince would like a guy of his size with the agility he's got, so I'm never going to rule it out. Not sure who the human tornado is. I'll give you guys a topic to discuss while I check it out on Youtube: Why do they call em rollerblades if you can't cut anything with them? You just can't go wrong with giving a harmless leisure product a bad-ass name, even if it doesn't do what it says on the tin. Okay, I'm back now. Yeah, he's pretty big and he can move--plus, being a minority doesn't hurt. He'll do. The good news for them, if they are ever signed, is that the WWE seems prepared to push these former indy types more than they have in the past. Punk and, latterly, Matt Sydal exemplifying this. Even Colt Cabana is on Smackdown now, after spending an eternity kicking his heels in whatever the WWE's developmental territory is now. Does this indicate the WWE's desire to broaden its range somewhat (with Sydal/Bourne being allowed to use the Shooting Star Press as a finisher), or do they simply pick those who they feel can be assimilated into the WWE style? They don't just desire to broaden their range, bub, they have to. Wrestlers have been dying for years because of complications derived from the use of painkillers and/or steroids, but the Benoit tragedy is really what brought the house of cards crashing down. I think McMahon and company have realized that they can no longer rely on the roided up bodies from the past, and they are going to need to change their style somewhat. The guys we've been talking about--sans McGuinness--are big, but not sculpted; they don't have bodies that look like they're born of drugs, and that's important to the WWF's image now, where it wasn't before. I don't know that Vince cares more about his athletes than he did before; likely not, but he does care about his company, he did institute the Wellness Policy for that reason, and if it takes giving guys he wouldn't have looked at once in the past a 3rd look, he's going to do it. The WWF could do a helluva lot worse than having Matt Sydal, CM Punk, and Colt Cabana on their main rosters, and maybe the steroid scandal/Benoit tragedy has given us the change that many in the IWC have wanted to see for years. That's a pleasingly optimistic view. As far as the short-to-medium term goes, I am inclined to agree. Looking further ahead, though, I can't help but note that the WWE has been down the road before in the wake of the 90's steroid trials. We shall see. Breaking news on the WWF main event front, aisce: Batista is unhappy with his push(or lack thereof) and is contemplating taking a break from the company. Should they hotshot things and put the strap on him in order to keep him happy? Batista always struck me as an honest worker, rather than a backstage Machiavelli, so I am not sure how far I credit the implication in the report, that he is cynical enough to be threatening a vacation as leverage to get a title run. He's not getting any younger, and has a look that must be increasingly difficult to maintain with age. Thus, his desire for a break may well be genuine, and it is only natural to want to achieve as much as possible in the time he has left. This works both ways of course, and the WWE would be wise to get what they can out of Batista (who, much to smarky chagrin, is a popular figure and valuable unit-shifter), before he lets himself go and ends up looking like Vader. There's no need to 'hotshot' him though: I am sure a properly conceived programme would be acceptable to Batista, and is certainly in the interests of both him and the WWE. Let's face it, Jericho was going to get shafted sometime by someone, and it may as well be Batista. Yeah, Jericho does have to lose to someone, and it actually has been quite a while since Batista last held the belt, if I remember correctly. If it does happen, though, I hope it's a heel vs. heel clash, as I love heel Jericho, and Batista's frustrations seem to be leading him down that "I'ma snap" road. Hell, maybe Michaels will beat Jericho at No Mercy and set up Michaels/Batista. Would be an interesting turnaround from their post-Mania minifeud. But, I don't think it would be the worst thing in the world if Batista were to take a short break. It's always worked for Taker, and there does seem to be an awful lot crammed into the two hours of RAW we get each week, as we discussed in the last episode. Either way, I agree with your assessment that Batista isn't using it for leverage, but I certainly can see why being forced away from the main event scene after so long in it would dishearten him a little; and if he is disheartened, I don't think a rushed title program is going to be anything more than a temporary fix. 5 Good... Questions with JoeyShinobi Welcome to the show, Joey. Glad to contribute. Good, then let's get started! Aisce? 1. I remember you from the Mega Drive. You could jump, somersault, and throw shuriken, but you couldn't run. What the hell is wrong with you? Ah, yes, that. Well, I found that in the majority of cases, the ability to jump, somersault and throw shuriken meant there was seldom a necessity to run. By that logic, I never bothered trying. 2. As a follow-up, don't you know that Ninja Gaiden was the better game? I always preferred Mariokart anyway. 3. Which wrestler has affected most profoundly your day-to-day life? Growing up, my favourite wrestlers were the ones who could work a mic. I didn't care much for ring work, although now I do. I am currently in a job where I do a lot of training, and I occasionally catch myself sounding a bit like Chris Jericho or Triple H when it comes to winding people up in public. So probably one of those two. Then again, Trish Stratus looked fantastic in lycra… 4.You and Hustle did a co-op column on ROH. Which wrestler do you see as their biggest strength, and which as their biggest weakness? Honestly, I haven't had time to explore the entire of Ring of Honor's roster, having only had access to a lot of the content for a few days now. I've mostly been checking out the guys that I've heard mentioned on these forums, so in most cases I don't really have a bad word to say about them as yet. I have to say, I've taken quite a shine (no homo) to Delirious, he's quite a character, and he's one of the strongest ring performers I've seen in quite some time. Ring of Honor, from what I've so far seen, don't have a lot of dead wood, which is something they definitely have over the likes of WWE and TNA – presumably, that's the distinct advantage of being an independent promotion. With a select group of wrestlers that are centrally contracted, they can afford to have only the best available, and not have to bother with their deadwood because ultimately, they aren't on the payroll. I guess youth is a hindrance when it comes to wrestling, so I guess some of the younger (early 20s) members of the roster would be my picks as 'weakest'. 5.Will a British wrestler ever win one of the WWE's two top titles? Why not? You like your rhetoric, don't you? I think British wrestlers will always struggle to crack the big one, for a wide variety of reasons, of which two I shall highlight; the first is that British wrestlers generally get stereotyped – they generally all have posh accents, speak the Queen's English, and use the word 'bloody' a lot. It's very difficult for the likes of William Regal and Paul Burchill to break through that, especially with the strength in depth of North American performers who, let's be honest, will almost always get preference to hold the gold. It makes good business sense, at the end of the day. The second reason is that to give a British wrestler the top gold would be to admit that there is no-one better in the world, that the best wrestler in the world (as WWE's top titles represent, at the very least in the WWE's eyes) doesn't come from North America. It will take someone monumentally good to break that perception down, and there simply isn't the interest in the country to generate someone of that capability. Anyone with a physique like that over here ends up playing something like rugby, or on a building site. Wrestling isn't really a British thing, so having a British champion doesn't really make much business sense. There is a third reason, but I'm not sure any of you would like it. Over/Under Length of time Santino's Intercontinental Title reign lasts: 27 weeks. Shamelessly, I turn to Wikipedia for information on IC title reigns. I think I mentioned last time that McMahon would like to see the Honky Tonk Man's 454 day record surpassed (the fact that a long Santino reign would also see him eclipse that of Savage might be an added bonus). Shelton Benjamin had the title for 244 days, and Santino is at least twice as entertaining. It'll probably be the kiss of death for his run (for which I apologise), but I see the reign going over 27 weeks, and over by a lot. Number of PPVs before Vladimir Kozlov gets a shot at the WHC: 3 Oh, that's interesting! I had thought his assault on Hardy might take Jeff out of his title match, thus giving anothe storyline reason for Jeff to once again miss "seizing the brass ring." But, they are still advertising Trips vs. Hardy for No Mercy; and there will probably be a rematch at No Mercy. You know what? I think there's an equal chance that he'll intervene more in this feud and get himself in at No Mercy in a Triple Threat match or that his shot will happen at Armageddon. Either way, it isn't going over 3 months. Part of me says to push, and the other part says under, so flip a coin: heads means under. Amount of time until MVP is WWE Champion: 8 months. This is a really tough one to call, as I can see someone like MVP going their whole career without ever quite winning the big one. That's not to say he isn't talented, or over, because he is. I just feel that he may be the one to miss out in a newly-crowded main event scene. He's good enough to be champ, certainly, but he isn't so good as to positively demand the belt be put on him. For that reason, I'll say 'over'. Average number of times Jerry Lawler will mention Manu's criminal past during each of his matches: 5 During each? Well, that depends on who he's wrestling. If his opponents continue to be Cryme Tyme week after week, it's probably going to go slightly over, but on an ongoing basis against various opposition, I'd say under. Remember, he used to refer to tits as "puppies" all the time, too, and that stopped after a few years. Big Finish This may be old news, but Pluto's no longer considered a planet? Is it just me, or has he always looked like a dog to you, too? It's still better than looking like Uranus. What? It's the only planet joke anyone knows. With International Speak Like a Pirate Day just around the corner, where do you stand on the age-old debate: pirates or ninjas? Ideally, I'd like to be a ninja pirate, but I can't help thinking that the peg leg would make stealth difficult and the eyepatch would seriously undermine my aim with the nunchuka. It occurs to me that when mentioning big indy guys that Vince would covet neither of us mentioned Tyler Black. Why? The McMahon mindset is contagious and deep-rooted. It has got to us too, Xan, and that can only mean that no-one is safe to consider averagely-sized wrestlers for the WWE. I'm sure our readers would appreciate some sound financial advice to help them through the coming recession, Xan. Got any? Yeah, I got this one. Whatever I do: don't. The Houston Astros were forced to move their "home game" to Milwaukee during the hurricane this past weekend. Good move, or completely insensitive? Anyone with the tiniest grain of sense got the hell out before the hurricane hit. I can hardly blame an NFL team for doing the same. Besides, with most of their fans too busy re-attaching their 10ft diameter Pornseeker ™ satellite dishes to the roofs of their trailers, home attendance would have been down anyway. Probably true, but a)The Astro(or assholes as my daughter mistakenly heard me say) play baseball and b) I think if I were a player, I'd be just a tad more worried about the health of my family than a baseball game. They play baseball? Crap, I assumed the weather wouldn't affect a basketball game, so I knew I had a 50-50 chance of getting it right. Tune in next week, when I shall be quizzing Xan on the finer points of the laws relating to lbw decisions. Wikipedia: It's not just for I-C reigns anymore. And as far as whatever lbw is goes, I guess the ol' Ambassador's got himself some homework to do. That's all we've got. We'll try to do better next time. Email to send feedback to XanMan Click Here Email to send feedback to aisce Click Here To email feedback to both of us or to send topics you'd like us to cover next time Click Here
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