Raw Report 11/05/2007
Submitted by Donny Anderson on Monday, November 5, 2007 at 11:16 PM EST
Raw Report 11/05/2007
Tonight's Raw is in the memory of The Fabulous Moolah 1923-2007
Tonight the USA Network presents Raw, live from the city of Angels... Los Angeles, California!!!
Raw starts tonight with DX's theme hitting to a massive pop. Triple H and Shawn Michaels come out soon after. They make their way to the ring, throwing green glow-sticks to the crowd on their way. They grab a mics, and after pumping the crowd up some more, Triple H announces that it's for one night only, and asks if the LA crowd if they're ready? Then, for the thousands in attendance and millions watching around the world... Hornswoggle's music hits, and little McMahon jumps out from the bottom of the ring, surprising Shawn and Triple H. HHH says "that's different" and tells Hornswoggle to get back under the ring. HHH asks Shawn if he's got a run-sheet, and after fiddling around, Shawn gives it to HHH, and HHH tells Hornswoggle that he's not in this segment... he's in the short segment. Hornswoggle jumps on Shawn and puts an armbar on him. Shawn gets out, and pronounces that Hornswoggle is "in for tonight." HHH sends Hornswoggle away again, but Hornswoggle says there's a monster under the ring. HBK goes and checks, but gets dragged underneath, only to come out with wroms in his mouth. Shawn gets the worms out, and the Boogieman's music hits. HHH says "ok... can I help you?" Boogieman says he wants to join DX. HBK says "ok, he's in too." HHH says "What the hell, get in line, you can never have enough freaks and weirdos." As soon as they line up to do the "lets get ready to suck it" part, Khali's music hits, and Khali comes down to the ring. HBK says before we even start, to keep him from getting beat down, lets just pretend he's not here, and move on. HHH says "ok, if you want to be part of DX, get in the back." Khali gets in the back. HHH starts doing a hilarious Indian accent, and the start to do the line once more, but Coach's music hits. Coach comes out, and says "Enough!" Coach says he's shutting this nonsense down, the crowd didn't come to see the immature antics. HHH calls Coach "George Jefferson" and tells him to lower his tone. HHH tells Runjin that Coach was talking trash about Khali. Runjin translates it to Khali, who then walks up and gives Khali a big chop to the forehead. Coach takes off running, and Khali follows him.
Back in the ring, Shawn and HHH are standing, and everyone else has disappeared. HBK calls this the worst debacle since "That whole Katie Vick thing" and asks who wrote this segment. HHH says "nobody writes this, they're all on strike... but we're not" to a resounding cheer. They say "lets get ready to suck it!" and if you're not down with that, they have two words for ya. DX celebrates to the familiar music as we go to commercial.
-commercial break-
Kelly Kelly v. Beth Phoenix
Beth walks up to Kelly, grabs her arm, and throws her down. This is followed by a fisherman suplex, and a three count. Beth dominates.
Your Winner: Beth Phoenix
Match Rating: C (Typical Squash match, which was to be expected. Beth is dominating the Diva division, and I gotta say, I like it.)
Santino is standing in the back, and says he has bad news. Marella says that Stone Cold will not be here tonight, because if he was going to be here, he'd be here already. In case he shows up, Santino brought a paper bag, so that Steve Austin can try to act his way out of it.
-commercial break-
Carlito v. Jobber "Joey"
Carlito says he's not competing tonight. He found a replacement. Snitsky's music hits.
Snitsky v. Jobber "Joey"
Snitsky throws him into the corner and smashes him with an elbow. Then, we get a big boot, and the pumphandle slam for the three count.
Your Winner: Snitsky
Carlito gets in the ring and raises Snitsky's hand, congratulating him. Snitsky nails Carlito with a big boot, and then hits him with a pumphandle slam.
Match Rating: C- (Okay, this made no sense. We get it, Snitsky is a monster. Jobbers shouldn't be mucking up my Raw.)
After this match, we get an AWESOME Jeff Hardy music video. Find this on Youtube if you can.
-commercial break-
Rey Misterio and Jeff Hardy v. Finlay and Kennedy
Kennedy is already in the ring when we come back, he is soon joined by Finlay. Misterio comes out, and is followed by Jeff Hardy, who gets the biggest pop of the night so far.
The match starts with Hardy and Finlay. A "Hardy" chant starts right away. Finlay and Hardy size each other up, and Finlay hits a Shoulder block, but Hardy doesn't go down. Finlay takes Hardy down, but Hardy counters and gets a two count. Finlay and Hardy both get up and tussle a but, before Hardy smacks Finlay and attacks Kennedy, who tried to attack Hardy. Kennedy is sent to the outside, but a clothesline from Finlay soon makes Hardy join him. Kennedy beats down Hardy, and Finlay tries to get Hardy back in the ring. An arguement between the two flares up, and Finlay and Kennedy go face to face as we go to a break.
-commercial break-
We come back to see Misterio and Kennedy in the ring. Rey hits a springboard body press followed by a headscissors takedown. After yet another high flying move, Kennedy hits a dropkick to the legs that grounds Misterio. Kennedy tags in Finlay, who comes in and stomps at the legs of the fallen Misterio. Finlay lifts up the high flying, slams him down, and locks in a half crab. Misterio tries to make a tag, but Finlay breaks the hold and attacks Jeff. Finlay then goes and tags Kennedy, who starts to work on the leg of Misterio some more. Kennedy tags out, Finlay works some more, then Kennedy comes back in. Kennedy works over Rey a bit, and then Finlay is tagged back in again. These two are tearing Rey apart. Finlay gets Rey in the corner, but Rey manages to drive his foot into Finlay's face. Rey follows up with a bulldog and tags in Hardy. Finlay tags in Kennedy. Hardy goes into it, hitting his usual flurry of moves. Jeff gets a two count after a falling clothesline, and follows it up with a whisper in the wind. Finlay comes in and throws Hardy to the outside. Misterio comes in and manages to prime both Finlay and Kennedy for the 619. Finlay ditches to the outside, and Kennedy gets the kick to the face. Rey then leaps off the apron to take out Finlay. Hardy is now up top and hits the swanton for the win.
Your Winners: Jeff Hardy and Rey Misterio
The crowd is going nuts as the winners celebrate in the ring.
Match Rating: A- (A solid match, not the best we've seen in recent weeks, but reasonably good. Hardy is crazy over with the fans, and his feud with Kennedy is working well. Misterio-Finlay is a feud that strangely seems to work well for both men, as well.)
Santino Marella is in the back, talking on a cell phone. Maria comes up and tells him that she heard that Stone Cold is here tonight. Marella tells her that there's a better chance of Austin winning and Oscar, and then tells her to accompany him to the ring.
-commercial break-
Santino hits the ring with Maria, saying that he's putting the rumors to rest. Steve Austin is not going to be here; he's like Kobe Bryant: he's bald, he's popular, and he doesn't want to be in L.A. either. Santino introduces the director of "the Condemned" and asks him a question: When he was filming "The Condemned" did he wish the guns were real so he could blow his brains out? The audience wished they could do that. Tonight, there will be no stomping of mudpies, and JR won't have an orgasm, because the Rattlesnake isn't here. WAIT, yes he is. Steve Austin's music hits and here comes Stone Cold. Stone Cold comes in to a MASSIVE pop. There's nobody like Stone Cold. This is awesome. Austin grabs the mic, holding a copy of the movie "The Condemned." Austin asks Santino how he's doing, and introduces himself. Austin says he's noticed that Marella has been misquoting Steve Austin. It's not ass-whoop, it's whoop-ass. It's not a mudpie, it's a mudhole. It's the bottom line, not the bottom lime. If you're going to quote Stone Cold, you better get it right. Steve says he's been watching Santino for 6 weeks run down the Condemned, and asks him if he's seen it. Marella says he's seen it once. Austin asks him about the action scenes, and Marella says it was so violent he had to leave. Austin asks about all the bonus features, but Marella turns those off too - it was 90 minutes of his life he couldn't get back. Stone Cold says Marella won't make his name off of Steve Austin. Austin asks him if wants a beer, but Marella says he hates beer, and wants wine. Austin says he understands, and gives Santino a copy of "the Condemned" as a gift. Santino throws it down, steps on it, and wants nothing to do with it. He catches the stunner (and sells it quite well). Stone Cold says he's not a doctor, but Santino looks thirsty. He puts the DVD in Santino's mouth, and leaves, saying he'll be right back.
Stone Cold is driving the Budweiser truck to the ringside, and he pulls out a hose. spraying the audience and Santino with some beer. Stone Cold celebrates as he's tossed a couple of beers and celebrates with the audience. The music stops, and Stone Cold turns his eyes towards Maria. He grabs the hose, as Maria begs him not to. Stone cold turns it on anyways, nearly spraying off her dress. He jumps on top of the beer truck and continues drinking as the crowd goes wild.
-commercial break-
VKM is in the back talking to Hornswoggle. He says he's not the Coach of the Philadelphia Eagles, but he knows a thing or two about Coaching. Vince tells Hornswoggle that he loves him, and because he loves him, he must have Hornswoggle stand on his own two feet. Vince says if size doesn't matter, then he won't mind his match at Survivor Series, the Great Khali. Khali shows up, and Hornswoggle just frowns and shakes his head.
HHH is in the back, and he says he's there to waste time, because Stone Cold ruined the ring and the Officials are trying to fix it. HBK comes out, and says he's found it. HHH says "ladies and gentlemen, the DX dancers." Big Dick Johnson comes out and starts dancing. HBK says he's sorry, and that as the father of two girls, he's not good at this; all he knows is Dora the Explorer and cartoons. HHH says it's okay, he's prepared, and introduces "The Girls Next Door," who come out and dance with HHH.
-commercial break-
Cody Rhodes v. Trevor Murdoch
Cody is accompanied by Hardcore Holly. Cade accompanies Murdoch, and Mickie James stops them and wishes him luck before he goes to the ring. Cade tells Murdoch that he needs to focus for this.
Murdoch starts off in control, slapping Cody around. Cody gets the upper hand for a minute, only to get caught with a boot by Murdoch. Murdoch starts wearing down Cody with a chinlock, but Cody starts to power out of it. He can't, but Murdoch throws him into the ropes and tries to give the atomic drop, but Cody gets out of it, hits a drop kick and a bulldog. Cody pulls his kneepad off, and hits a kneedrop on Murdoch. Murdoch gets the upper hand for a moment, but Cody jumps out of the way after Cade tries to interfere, sending Murdoch crashing into the turnbuckle. Cody hits a sunset flip for the win.
Your Winner: Cody Rhodes
Match Rating: B (This was a good back and forth match. Not much else to say, but it was fun and it served its purpose.)
JR then gives a eulogy for Fabulous Moolah, followed by a good video package that highlighted the career of the late Champion.
-Commercial break-
Hacksaw Jim Duggan is in the ring with Super Crazy, doing a "Hooooo" "Siiiiiii" back and forth.
Hacksaw Jim Duggan and Super Crazy vs. World's Greatest Tag Team
Haas brings it to Crazy, getting him down with a body slam, then tags in Benjamin. Shelton hits a few hard slams, and then tags in Haas. Crazy takes a few more hard slams. Duggan is trying to rally, by a "USA" chant, but Shelton is tagged in and hits a few more slams. Crazy tries to crawl to Duggan, and Shelton mocks him before hitting Duggan. Hacksaw is not too happy. Benjamin is taunting Duggan, and is rolled up by Super Crazy for a three count.
Your Winners: Super Crazy and Hacksaw Jim Duggan
Benjamin attacks the weakened Super Crazy, but is brought down by a clothesline from Hacksaw. Haas tries to assist Benjamin, but is scared away by the legendary Hacksaw.
Match Rating: C (Ummm...what?)
-commercial break-
Randy Orton and Umaga v. Triple H and Shawn Michaels
Umaga comes out first, soon followed by the WWE Champion, Randy Orton. DX comes out and goes right to it. HBK sends Orton out of the ring, and then DX double teams Umaga. Umaga tries to attack, but is sent over the top rope. HBK launches himself over the top into Umaga, and Triple H slams Orton into the announce table. Now the action goes into the ring, and Triple H tags in HBK. HBK works on Orton's arm, but Orton manages to hit a knee to the gut, and tags in Umaga. Umaga starts to attack, but HBK lands a sunset flip, that Umaga tries to sit down on. HBK dodges, and tags in Triple H. The Game goes at it, and hits some great moves on Umaga. Umaga manages to catch HHH in midair, and hit a sidewalk slam. Umaga hits a headbutt on the ground as we go to a commercial.
-commercial break-
Triple H is in the corner, being beaten down by Umaga. Umaga goes to do the running butt smash, but HHH dodges. Umaga tags in Orton, who runs at HHH. HHH hits a boot to the face, and clotheslines Orton. Both men try to get up, and HHH tags in HBK. HBK with a flying forearm, nip-up, and inverted atomic drop. HBK knocks Umaga off of the apron, and climbs the top rope to hit a flying eblow drop. Umaga slides in a hits a massive clothesline. Orton now tags in Umaga, who starts to tear HBK apart. HBK tries to fight back in the corner, but Umaga manages to knock him back down. Orton tags in, and hits a nice dropkick. Orton covers, but only gets a two count. Orton is not happy, and he starts to stomp at HBK. An "HBK" chant breaks out, and HBK starts to fight back. Orton hits a drop toe-hold, and tags in Umaga. Umaga crushes HBK with a splash, and then grabs a nerve-hold on HBK's shoulder. HBK fights to his feet, and starts to punch away, but a headbutt by Umaga sends him back down. Umaga climbs the ropes, and misses a diving headbutt thanks to HBK's quick thinking. HBK crawls to HHH, but is pulled away by Umaga. HBK hits an enziguri, and tags in HHH as Orton tags in. HHH starts beating both Umaga and Orton. HHH knocks Orton down with a knee lift, and then goes for Umaga with a knee-facebuster. HHH sends Umaga into the corner ring post, and hits a spinebuster on Orton. HHH goes for the Pedigree, but Umaga hits a samoan spike. Both men are down, but Orton crawls over HHH. 1...2...NO, HHH kicks out. Orton rolls over and tags in Umaga, who beats HHH in a corner, and hits the running butt-smash. Umaga cheap shots HBK, and goes to attack HHH, but gets caught with a low-blow. Umaga tags out to Orton, who immediately stalks for the RKO, but Triple H pushes him into Umaga, and tags in HBK. HBK ducks a clothesline, and hits some Sweet Chin Music for the win.
Your Winners: Degeneration X
HBK and Triple H celebrate in the ring, as Orton is out in the middle of the ring.
Match Rating: A- (A very solid main event. It reminded me of the old Nitro days, with the show going a good while longer than the time slot usually allows. HBK taking the win out of nowhere was nice too. A good ending, and a nice set up for Survivor Series in 2 weeks.
Final Grade: B-
It was entertaining, but that's about it. A pretty solid main event capped off a decent night of wrestling. The Kennedy/Finlay v. Rey/Jeff match was by far the highlight of the evening, and the DX segments were as good as they always are. The "Mystery" promo was toned down, and at this point, is almost an afterthought. Very little Vince, and very little storyline progression. That, along with 2 squashes, make this Raw entertaining, but ultimately forgettable.
Questions and Comments are appreciated, and can be sent to DonnyAnderson@gmail.com. Thanks, and have a great week!
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