Raw Results 9/17/07
Submitted by Donny Anderson on Tuesday, September 18, 2007 at 12:00 AM EST





Raw Report 9/17/07

Raw begins with a recap of the Cena/Orton feud thus far, including last night's encounter with Coach at Summerslam. Once that's over, Cena's music hits, and the Champ is kicking things off at Raw! He makes his way down to the ring and grabs the mic. He says that he knows some people are upset with him; that he hasn't been himself lately. He says he's sorry, and although he's had alot of pent up aggression lately, tonight he feels fabulous. The Champ says everything is going to be okay, because last night he lost to Randy Orton. Cena says thank you to his Dad, for being brave and making him the proudest son on the face of the earth. He also thanks Randy Orton, because Orton has made him put into perspective the things in life that are important, and that he's stupid enough to want a rematch. The most important Thank You is to Jonathan Coachman, who booked the last man standing match at No Mercy. While he's talking about No Mercy, Coach's music hits! Coach says Cena shouldn't be thanking him for making that match, he should be thanking him that he still has a job after his father attacked a WWE Superstar and Cena put his hands on him. Coach says just like Cena feels he got revenge last night, Coach is allowing Orton to feel the same. Tonight, Orton vs. Cena, right here, tonight! Coach met with Cena's father this morning, and informed him that he may have stripping Cena of the title. Cena's father pleaded with Coach not to do it, and told Coach that he'd do anything to prevent Cena from losing the title. Coach then says that tonight, it's not Randy Orton vs. the Champ John Cena, it's Randy Orton vs. Mr. Cena, John's Father! Cena is beside himself as Raw goes to a commercial...

After the break, Jeff Hardy's music hits, and we have our first match of the night!

Jeff Hardy (c) v. Shelton Benjamin, for the IC Title


Benjamin in control early with a suplex and a few blows to the head. Hardy into the ropes, but hits a reverse atomic drop and a low dropkick, and now he's in control with an armbar on Shelton. A series of armdrags by both men leaves Hardy in control once again, but Shelton stands up on it. Shelton breaks the hold and reverses it, torquing Jeff's arm. Hardy twists his way out of it and powers Shelton to the ground with a overhead wristlock. Hardy puts Shelton in the corne, but after an exchange, we end up with Shelton on the apron, and Hardy delivers a reverse mulekick sending Shelton out of the ring. Hardy then hits a flying crossbody over the top rope to the outside, and Raw goes to break with both men reeling on the outside.

We get back with Shelton in control over Hardy in the ring. Hardy starts to power out but gets caught with a face first back drop by Shelton. Hardy now down in the corner, and is hit with a running knee to the face by Shelton. Neckbreaker by Benjamin gets a 2 count, and follows that ujp with a few headbutts and a sleeperhold. Jeff powers out, but Shelton catches him once again, and gets a 2 count. Jeff stumbles to his feet, and ducks when Shelton goes for a kick. Both men clothesline each other, get an 8 count before they get back up. Hardy hits the whisper in the wind, and goes for the twist of fate, but Shelton gets out of it and hits a backbreaker for another 2 count. Shelton in the corner, but moves, and Jeff goes face first into the turnbuckle, only to turn around and be caught in a russian legsweep. Then, Shelton hits a reverse DDT on Hardy for yet another 2 count. Hardy to the top rope, Shelton pounces up there, but gets pushed off, and Jeff follows up with a Swanton for the win.

Your Winner: Jeff Hardy

Match Rating: B+ (This was an incredible match, but seemed to drag just a little long, and the commentary by JR and King was downright annoying during this one, which keeps the match out of A territory. Jeff sells just fine without JR having to put over every little thing.)

After the match we get a Find-a-whore 2k7, aka "Diva Search," commercial.

After that, we have Vince in a limo. Coach gets in the limo and tells Vince that it's going to be a great night. Vince doesn't care; he only cares about his predicament. Coach says it's not going to last much longer; he's taken care of everything, and after tonight, Vince won't have to worry about him anymore. They show Hornswoggle in a car-seat, and Vince says he has to sit there because he's an infant, and that's the law. Hornswoggle gets out of the seat and chases Coach out of the Limo. Pretty funny segment.

We come back from commercial to John Cena talking to his father. Cena is trying to talk his father out of wrestling, but Mr. Cena won't back down.

Then we have Santino outside of the Diva's locker room. Jillian Hall comes out, and they put in a plug for the Condemned, and say something about Britney Spears. Then Santino says he can't believe he used to pleasure himself to Britney Spears. ...god.... Okay, now they're planning on singing country music tonight. Santino comes up with what he calls a "better idea" and leaves.

Vince and Coach are walking in the back when they hear irish music playing. Vince says it's coming from his office; Vince's office is covered in Irish stuff. Vince says this was all on Coach. Coach says that when he finds him, he'll handle this. Vince tells Coach to find him. Hornswoggle shows up in the background, says "hi Dad!" and takes off running. Coach runs after him. Now, there's a Horse with a Unicorn attachment. Vince looks scared as Raw goes to break... that was like some sort of weird acid trip.

We come back to Lilian Garcia announcing a "Flag match" between Iran and USA.

Daivari v. Hacksaw Jim Duggan

Daivari goes for his flag, but Hacksaw pulls him down and delivers a bodyslam to Daivari. Daivari stops Hacksaw from getting the US flag, and then starts pounding away on Duggan. Daivari goes for the flag, but Hacksaw stops him again by holding his legs. This time, Daivari gets all the way to the top, but Hacksaw pulls him down and Daivari racks himself on the turnbuckle. Duggan heads over to his flag, and Daivari meets him at the top rope. Hacksaw knocks Daivari from the top turnbuckle to the outside of the ring, and grabs the flag for the victory!

Your Winner: Hacksaw Jim Duggan

Match Rating: B- (An Old School surprise! Gimmick matches like these are fun, and this was a cool way of mixing things up. For a Hacksaw match, this was a fun one. Daivari jobs, but looks good doing so.

In the back, Cody Rhodes begs Coach to let him fight Orton instead of Cena's father. Coach says no, and walks away, only to run face first into Cena. Cena says if he doesn't call off the match, he will not be held responsible for what happens tonight. Coach says that Cena will have a match tonight, against an opponent of Coach's choice. If Cena wins, he'll cancel the match between Orton and his father. Cena's fate is in his hands.

After the break, Vince's music hits and the chairman comes down to the ring and grabs a mic. He says that we are all surprised that his grapefruits produced Hornswoggle. He says that he doesn't want us to think he's not proud of his new son, and that he's compassionate. He says he wants to welcome his new son into his family, and he wants us to do the same. Vince introduces Hornswoggle, who comes down to the ring with an Irish jig theme song. He dances around the ring, and Vince is annoyed, telling him repeatedly to stop dancing. Vince asks if he's happy to be a McMahon. Vince says that when, if, he dies, that Hornswoggle will come into a lot of money. Vince tells him that money is not everything, and that life is really about love and compassion. Vince will open his heart tonight and do something that Hornswoggle will appreciate. Vince tells him that he has some legal papers, and that he's putting Hornswoggle up for adoption. Hornswoggle looks crushed. Vince announces the new parents, who come out to the ring with an attorney. Alice and Ed are their names, apparently. Ed says that they've waited years for a little boy, and that Hornswoggle is everything Vince said he'd be. Alice says that they'll love Hornswoggle so much. Hornswoggle looks like he's about to cry. Vince tells him, rather cruelly, to say hello to his new dad. Hornswoggle pulls Ed's pants down, and begins to attack him. Ed ditches the ring, and Vince tells him to come back and sign the legal papers. Vince tries to tell Alice that Hornswoggle has never done something like this before, but the little guy attacks Alice from behind, biting her in the...well...behind. Ed and Alice run away with their lawyer close behind. Vince flips out on Hornswoggle, telling him to get out of his life, and to stay away from him. He then tells Hornswoggle to crawl back under his rock. Hornswoggle slowly walks up the ramp, crying. Vince tells the crowd that they would have done the same thing in that position. Suddenly, Triple H's music hits, and the Game looks like he's got something to say. Vince asks what he's doing here. Triple H says that Vince seems mad that he's out here, considering he went through a lot of trouble to decorate Vince's office. He says it's not easy to find a unicorn in Nashville. He says that he knew Vince slept with some trolls in his day, but he didn't know Vince slept with elves, fairies, and hobgoblins too. Vince says that he doesn't sleep with fairies, to which Triple H replies that's not what he read on the internet. He wonders why Vince didn't see this coming, seeing as Vince is short-tempered, short-sighted, and has a microscopic penis. Vince asks if he's finished, and Triple H says that's what Hornswoggle's mom said to Vince. He asks if Vince did it with Hornswoggle's mom on the Yellow Brick Road or if he got her to Smurf Village first. He says that Vince is obviously upset, and that he just has one quick question. He asks Vince if Hornswoggle's mom was magically delicious. Vince says that he's got some problems, but not as big as Triple H's. Vince introduces Triple H's opponents for the night...Cade and Murdoch. We go to break as Cade and Murdoch make their way to the ring.

Triple H vs. Cade and Murdoch

We come back from the break to Murdoch with a side headlock on Triple H. Triple H is fighting out, but Murdoch manages to tag Cade, and they try a double team. Triple H lands a clothesline to both Cade and Murdoch and tosses both men out of the ring. Carlito now comes out and stands at the top of the entrance ramp. Cade manages to hit a swinging neckbreaker, and works over Triple H a little, before tagging in Murdoch. After a double team move Murdoch pounds away on Triple H, hitting some nice shots in the corner. Murdoch climbs the ropes, and hits a move that a man of his stature shouldn't do. Murdoch tags in Cade, who works on Triple H some more, eventually locking in a neck vice. Triple H fights to his feet, but Cade gets him in the corner, only to be met by Triple H's foot. Cade hits a nice heel kick on the rebound, and tags in Murdoch. Murdoch gets Triple H down, and goes to the top again, but is met by Triple H's foot as he comes down. Murdoch quickly tags in Cade, who goes on the offense, but Triple H begins to fight back. He manages to launch Murdoch out of the ring, and Cade gets hit with a spinebuster. Triple H makes the cover and gets the win.

Your Winner: Triple H

Carlito runs down to the ring and starts to attack Triple H with Cade and Murdoch helping out. As the Game looks to be in trouble, help comes in the form of London and Kendrick. The two chase away Cade and Murdoch, leaving Carlito alone with Triple H. Carlito turns around into a spinebuster. Triple H looks to do more damage, but Carlito ditches the ring. London and Kendrick now stand in the ring with Triple H, and extend their hands to him. Triple H looks as if he's about to say "why not?" and shakes their hands. He then lands a right to London and hits the Pedigree on Kendrick, before hitting London with a Pedigree as well. Triple H stands in the ring with London and Kendrick laid out in the ring before him as we go to a break.

Match Rating: B- (A good match, but brought down by the fact that we didn't see the beginning. The London and Kendrick angle was interesting, and I laughed when London and Kendrick got both got laid out. I don't know what that says about me, but I love that Triple H is back.)


Beth Phoenix comes to ringside, and she's hear to observe tonight's Diva's match.

Candace and Mickie v. Melina and Jillian

Mickie and Melina start things off, with Mickie in control early. Mickie with a back-kick, and she's climbing to the top rope. Jillian interferes, sending Mickie to the canvas. Melina tags in Jillian, and she drags Mickie by the hair. Tag in to Melina, who delivers a scissors kick to Mickie. Mickie struggles, but gets the tag, and Candace is in, giving clotheslines to Melina. Backbody drop by Candace, followed by a northern lights suplex. Jillian interrupts a pin. Melina tags in Jillian, but Candace nails an Unprettier for the win! Beth Phoenix comes into the ring and gives Candace the belt, along with a shove and a stare as the Glamazon leaves, keeping her eyes locked on Candace the whole time.

Your Winner: Candace and Mickie

Match Rating: B (A fair contest with some pretty good action. I hate seeing all this talent be wasted while Beth and Candace carry out their feud, but the Diva's division really only allows for one feud at a time. Phoenix is a legitimate threat to the title though, so I like this feud so far.)


After a break, Coach and Vince are in the back, and Vince is leaving. Coach says he hasn't seen Hornswoggle in awhile. Vince says "Take care of Cena tonight." As his limo leaves, the trunk opens up, revealing Hornswoggle back there, waving his arms, and saying "Bye Coach!" Coach tries to stop the limo, but it pulls away, and Raw goes to Commercial.


John Cena against Mystery Opponent: Santino Marella

Cena is laughing, and the fans are sighing. Yay, Cena vs. Marella. This is what we wanted to see. Cena starts off with a headlock and two shoulderblocks, follwed by a drop belly to back suplex. Five Knuckle Shuffle. Santino is trying to run away, but Cena grabs him and pulls him back in the ring. Orton hits the ring, and both guys start beating up Cena. Orton takes out handcuffs, and locks Cena to the bottom rope.

Your Winner: John Cena by DQ

Orton stands tall in the ring, waiting for the next match. Coach comes out and says there's a misunderstanding. Even though he won, he had to win by pinfall or submission. Since that didn't happen, Cena's father must fight Orton after the commercial. Orton heads back up the ramp as we head to break.

We come back, and this time Orton comes back out, this time to his music. So, basically, he left the ring, and turned around and came back with his music playing. O...kay... Anyways, Orton is here, and Cena's Dad comes out to no entrance music or anything. Cena is still locked to the bottom rope.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena's Dad

Orton grabs him by the head and kicks him in the stomach, sending him to the mat. Orton now taunts Cena, and delivers a few stomps to Cena's Dad's stomach, his hand, and then his legs. The whole time, Orton keeps an eye on Cena, as Papa Cena screams in pain. Cody Rhodes hits the ring, and makes a valiant effort to save Mr. Cena, only to get tossed out of the ring. Orton then irish whips Cody into the ringsteps. Orton back in the ring now, and RKO's Papa Cena. Cena took the turnbuckle off, and now rushes at Orton, but Orton steps out of the ring, and smiles at Cena as he leaves the ring. Cena tends to his father while staring down Orton, as Raw goes off the air!

Your Winner: No Contest

Match Rating: B (Sometimes a crowd can work to the disadvantage of an angle. This was one of those times. Look, whatever you might think, chanting "You Can't Wrestle!" as Cena is staring down Orton is lame. Meaning, don't chant that unless the guy is actually "wrestling." It was cool to see Cody come out and get involved, even if just to get buried. He'll have his day. Cena's Dad put up no fight whatsoever. It was almost sad.)


Final Grade: B-

It was a decent Raw, but a rather lackluster follow-up to a lackluster pay-per-view. Bad crowd tonight, as it seemed quiet, and when it wasn't quiet, it was the typical cynic crowd. Very anti-Cena, which is fine, but it seemed to take away from the excitement of the match. Boos and Cheers are fine, but the chants just seemed uninspired. Bad commentary tonight as well; JR and King were mostly a distraction, not an enhancement.

Match of the Night: Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin


Questions, comments, and concerns can be sent to DonnyAnderson@gmail.com. See you all next week!








*NEW GALLERY* Wow! The Amazing RED CORSET Bedroom Photos of WWE's Maryse!

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