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Submitted by Wevv Mang on Monday, February 12, 2007 at 3:49 AM EST
Ridin’ With The Bossman – NWO – 2007, A Different Story Greetings! Welcome to another edition of Ridin' With The Bossman. The column that Trump briefs his staff with on all matters of wrestling. And real estate apparently. I had a goods moment of cosmic whimsy this week. On Tuesday I got a special something in the mail. From Donald Trump. No joke. The returns address, Trump, New York City. Wow. Trump wants to meet with me! Unbelievable! Of course, it was just two tickets to attend an all day seminar for one of his cronies from the apprentice, and get an Amway pitch, but hey. I now can say that I personally correspond with Donald Trump. Not even Meltzer gets mail for Trump! Take that Dave! You may have your super secret sources, but I get mail from Billionaires! What next? Postcards from Vince? You never know, it could happen. I mean really, there are rumors of the Phoenix Raw turning into a Supershow. For Saturday Night Main Event, no less. That means a shitload of wrestling, and a butt load of sports entertainment. It could, theoretically, turn into a four or fie hour show. That’s a long time. Wow. Now THAT’S value. Pretty cool. Indeed. Well, we have a jam-packed column for you today. Wrestling is hopping. The ratings for WWE, on all three networks are climbing. It seems like everything is clicking into place, even ECW, though I will admit right now, I missed the show Tuesday. There’s competition crawling out of the woodwork, in TNA getting a special Monday night show, tonight as a matter of fact. Raw is getting pre-empted and will air on Thursday instead. Think of this, the first show WWE puts on this week, leading into a PPV, will be ECW. WWE TV – The Series Raw Recap info courtesy of Chad Matthews Undertaker Makes His Decision Undertaker comes out first. WE get the five-minute treatment. Cena then comes out. Then Lashley. Then Batista. Taker eyed each one, and then stared at Batista, and did the throat slice gesture. And Batista it is. HBK then came out. He wanted to face Cena. Orton then came out, and said he should face Cena. Edge then came out and said he should face Cena. Oh, and by the way, Batista, Taker, and Lashley are all still there, just watching this go on. Vince finally came out, and said there would be a #1 contender’s match tonight. Oh, and that since no one challenged Lashley, he would defend his title on Raw. Cryme Tyme and Carlito w/ Torrie vs The World’s Greatest Tag Team and Chris Masters Outside interference is the name of the game, and even thought they are outnumbered in that area, TWGTT and Masters manage to sneak the win. Kenny, Coach and Vince Coach and Vince are having a private moment when Kenny interrupts and says he will challenge Bobby for the ECW championship. Umaga vs Balls You know, since there is an overlap of the ECW Originals vs the Establishment, wouldn't it just fit better if Umaga was the champion? Armanado could speak for him, saying that these ECW rejects think they belong in the WWE? Umaga then crushes them. Fits like a glove. Oh, and Umaga does indeed, crush Balls. Mickie James vs Melina The Woman’s belt is on the line, and it’s an honest to goodness match. Melina has some solid skills. She has the charisma too. She’s like Trish Stratus, not quite, but the potential is certainly there. Mickie retains after a decent, if sloppy match. Melina just tries way too much stuff that I don't think Mickie knows quite how to handle. HBK and Cena, Best Buds Brief little exchange between Cena and HBK. HBK tries to speak for Cena, but Cena says in the end, they are the Tag team Champions. Together. Nicely done. Better than I tried to summarize. Jeff hardy vs Ric Flair Very nice promo from Flair earlier. The match was pretty good. Jeff retained and Ric shook his hand. Carlito, Torrie and Ric Carlito and Torrie are heading out for the night, before the main event, when they run into Ric pacing the hallways. Ric rips into them about leaving early. Ric says that losing and leaving before the main event, for WRESTLEMANIA is not cool! That sometimes he wanders these hallways trying to figure out who he is? Leaving? Not cool! Tangent Well, that was interesting. The backstage rumor is that there is a feeling that Carlito is just going through the motions. He’s not going all out, and is just picking up a check and doing enough to get by. I disagree with that, but I’m not an insider, just some guy watching the show. To me, Carlito isn't really being given the opportunity to shine. And then again, I don't think anyone was saying this to Undertaker and H, when they were just coasting. You know, just showing up for TV, and/or taking time off. The situation has changed with Taker, as he’s actually showing up, and is playing his role right now. But there was a time he wasn’t. Which makes this situation sound to me like a bunch of old veterans who now have to work, complaining about it. See, Shelton Benjamin is another person being named as a slacker. Shelton, who has tons of athletic ability, and when given a chance, takes it. Carlito is a guy who was raised in a wrestling family, and knows the drill. He knows that his time will come, and is waiting to be given something to really work with. Then, of course, there is the H factor. Yes, H does play a part in this. H is out. That means TV time for more people. It also means that creative doesn't have to focus on H. It means that young talent has a golden chance to rise up, not just HBK, Taker, Cena, or anyone else. It’s a chance for the undercard to make an impact. Carlito does have charisma. Shelton has the athletic ability. Give them a solid angle, and there’s no telling what could happen. Not necessarily together, but you catch my drift. Unless of course, it’s all just some angle being put together, where these guys will go “Ric was right! I need to work harder!” in which case, they will more than likely, promptly be jobbed out left and right. Just a case of wait and see I guess. HBK vs Edge vs Orton HBK wins. A solid match. Edge turns on Orton, and Orton turns on Edge, and HBK takes advantage to pick up the win. Final moments saw Batista come out, and then Undertaker. So, it’s an unfriendly alliance. Well, the show certainly has put all the pieces in place, and just a random observation. No H, ratings go up, and wrestling seems to be getting hot again. Coincidence? I think not. One last thought. Trump will be appearing at Raw this Thursday. The tease was given that Vince will try and make Trump join the kiss my ass club. I hope not. But I did thin of an angle that Trump and Vince could do. It will take some setting up, but I think it could pay off. Trump brings his Apprentices to Raw. No idea if the show is still going on, as I think they have taped all the episodes, but plants will work as well. There task will be to purchase tickets from the audience heading into the show. The goal, to get a section of seats on camera, where they can hold up Trump signs, maybe do one of those huge signs that are done in pieces. Maybe have it say Trump of something like that. That would be more humiliating that dropping money on the crowd. To have Vince’s very own audience turn against him. Now, to make it happen, it will take some planning. Luckily, there’s an easy way to do it. I do know that the local radio station has a block of tickets that they sell early to their listeners. I don't know if it’s on camera or not, but to make it work, it would have to be. A bunch of pre-taped skits will also be needed. It’s a way to cross promote both shows, and build to the feud. ECW Recap courtesy of Eddie Martin I didn't see the show, but here are the results. Vince is back Vince has a confrontation with the ECW originals. They’re going to have matches and there will be consequences if they interfere in each other’s matches. Kevin Thorn vs Tommy Dreamer Thorn wins after Striker costs Dreamer the match. Striker was the special guest referee. Bobby Lashley vs Hardcore Holly Bobby wins. Snitsky makes an appearance. Monty Brown vs Balls Mahoney Striker is the special guest timekeeper. Seems like a Striker heavy show, so I’m kinda of glad I missed it. RVD vs Elijah Burke Thorn rings the bell before the match is over, and Striker announces Burke as the winner. Match is restarted and Burke low blows RVD to get the win. What the fudge? Man, seems like a cluster of a show. But the ratings are going up, due to Vince. Huh. Funny how Dunn took over the website and it started to tank, and then Dunn took over ECW basically, and it started to tank. Now that Vince is trying to save it, progress was being made, but I think there’s still a long way to go. I’ll have to try and catch next week’s show. Smackdown Recap courtesy of Rudi Pavani Taker squashes Miz Yep, Miz does a good job of playing the reluctant, frightened heel. Taker just squashes him, and no sells his offense. Good for the angle, but hopefully it doesn't become a weekly thing. Just squashing people I mean. Greasers vs Kendrick and London Greasers win. Booker T Replay from last week, and the great Booker skit. Booker learns from teddy that he will be facing Kane at No Way Out. Matt hardy vs Joey Mercury Long match, and some great work. Mercury picks up the win. Solid match and angle advancement. Kennedy Speaks Great promo by Kennedy about Batista and how he should have won. The guy can really talk and he can wrestle. Time to let the guy do his thing with a belt. Boogey Man vs Finlay Odd match. Finlay tried and the announcers tried as well. Key statements ‘No one can figure the guy out in the ring”. True words. Finlay picks up the win after Boogey goes for the Leprechaun. Daivari vs Gregory Helms Solid match and HEY! Daivari is back on TV! And he’s going for the cruiserweight title! He loses, but HEY! He’s back on TV! Kristal and Teddy Matt Striker? Come on honey. Jeez, I want a job with WWE, so I can bang some Divas. If Striker and a freakin’ Spirit Squad scrub can land Torrie, hell, I’m in like Flynn. Oh, and there’s going to be a talent contest at No Way Out. Heaven help us, I hope there’s some bikini action. Kennedy vs Batista Batista wins in a long match. Not bad. A lot of wrestling on this show. Not many skits, and the ones we did get were quick and to the point. A bit replay heavy, but again, they advanced the angle and were quick and to the point. Still a solid show, but Raw has overtaken them in terms of planning and advancement. There’s a PPV next week, so that’s got to play a factor. There's a lot riding on this PPV, and a lot has been put into it to make it interesting. Raw, Smackdown, and who knows, maybe even some last minute ECW matches could be added. No Way Out is not just a throw away PPV, this year. I’m going to skip OAW this week. There’s two rumors I want to talk about, but I’ll save that for the end of the column. Because right now, I have something special for you. As you may know, I am a huge Bears fan. That’s the Chicago Bears, of the NFL for my overseas friends. This year, the Bears made it to the Superbowl, and well, they lost. Damn you Rex Grossman. I had placed a wager on the event with a post here at LOP. And the wager was that if he won, he would get column space. So, without further ado, I present: Well, well, well, look who got the chance to drivel on the main page that is Lordsofpain.net. It is indeed I, Slap, and I'm here today to give you, the good readers of LoP, a real view of what's going on in the world that is professional wrestling. I'm sure a lot of you are currently wondering what I mean by "real", which I'll go ahead and explain to you all before I ramble on to the point of dreariness.... If you're reading this column, chances are you're either reading it because word leaked out of my special guest appearance, and you want to see how truly bad I am at this, or, you generally read columns that are posted on LoP, by handpicked columnists, elected to the main page by the sites webmaster, Calvin Martin. For those of you who are reading this column due to the latter bounds, let me describe what I mean by "real". "Real", in this piece here, is the adjective being used to describe what's truly happening in the world of professional wrestling today. When reading columns here on LoP, and being apart of the IWC, I see a lot of anti-real talk, and I legitimately think it's moronic. An example of this, would be pre-royal rumble predictions made by some columnists, and internet wrestling messageboard posters. Look folks, if you're on the up & up of what's going on in the WWE at all, it was blatantly obvious that the winner of the royal rumble was going to be one of three different people; the Undertaker, HBK, or Randy Orton. I saw columnists, and internet wrestling messageboard goers, naming people like Kane, Carlito, Kennedy (who wasn't even in the fucking rumble for Christ sakes), Chris Masters, and even, I shit you not, Matt Hardy, as predictable winners of the royal rumble. Do you people see how stupid you look? It's one thing to come out and say "I want Snitsky to win the royal rumble", but it's a whole other form of doltishness to expel a line like "Snitsky is going to win the royal rumble." Obviously you watch wrestling if you're posting on an internet wrestling messageboard, and more/less, follow the news bits from the forums main page. WHAT IN YOUR RIGHT MIND WOULD MAKE YOU THINK SNITSKY IS SET TO MAIN EVENT WRESTLEMANIA 23!? Other crap I see spewed around by columnists, and internet wrestling messageboard goers, is farce WM23 matches. Hate to burst your bubbles, but Hogan vs. Austin is NOT going to happen. Stop whacking off all over internet wrestling messageboard threads about it already. Neither is a title unification, a Rock appearance, or a live castration going to go through. Now that we've gotten that shit out of the way, lets talk some wrasslin, shall we? Raw is Slap Monday featured one of the better Raws in awhile, but most WWE shows between the royal rumble and Wrestlemania usually are a step above the rest. Takers first appearance on Raw in the last 4 years was well put together, especially the way in which he made his decision on who he would face at WM23, as I was wondering if they were going to actually have him speak or not. Stare down Cena, stare down Lashley (like there was a chance in hell Lashley was going to be in the WM23 main event), stare down Batista, then start to head back towards Cena, only to quickly turn around and give Batista the slashing of the neck signal, symbolizing that Batista is the clear choice for Takers WM23 opponent. Very well done WWE creative. Didn't see Flair losing the non-title match against Jeff Hardy, for the chance to face Hardy at WM23 with the IC title on the line, but it turned out the loss had significance. Later on, Flair ran into Carlito, who also lost a match that night, and went off on him, questioning him for just packing his bags and leaving, while he was still there, doing everything and anything he had to do to convince the WWE that he belongs there. Good stuff again, although from what has been reported on the main page, I thought it was Shelton Benjamin who was the one just supposedly collecting checks. VKM vs. Trump is lame, even if it is some sort of long-term setup for Hogan vs. Khali (though apparently now the running match for Hogan is Hogan vs. Shane?). Just have Hogan make an appearance, have Khali come out and kick the shit out of him, and setup the match for WM. That's all that's needed. The main event was HBK vs. Orton vs. Edge for the shot at the WWE championship at WM. Orton and Edge worked together as long as they could, before they knew they had to turn on one another, which, of course, backfired in their favor, and allowed HBK to become the (obvious) challenger for Cena at WM23. Definitely the best option in the Raw roster, and better than HHH, who you know would have had said spot if he didn't bust his shit. Quick recap of ECW - While the originals vs. the new wave has a decent chance to bloom, the show still lagged. RVD is guaranteed on his way out, and WWE management now knows this, so it's job city for him until his last check. Quick recap of WSX - A lot better fed than I thought, but I honestly don't know any of the talent besides shit-pac and Vampiro, which makes it a bit hard for me to get into. Either way, I dig spotfests, which this fed is. Quick recap of Impact - We all know Angle has a stipulation in his one year contract, that says he'll get the NWA world title strap at some point, but for him to beat Christian, after Christian just picked up the strap last ppv, would be just another way for TNA to shit on the belt. Let him pick it up months down the road, not now, though his complete creative control may dictate different. Anyone who watches Impact, and has not been able to figure out who the special "attitude" counselor, or whatever, is going to be, should go and sit under the nearest tree with the local mongaloid, and help him eat the bugs off the bark. Not sure what Joe's ringside stance will be during that match, but I bet he screws one of the two out of the title. Quick recap of Smackdown - Remember what I was talking about with the "real" wrestling talk bit, well those of you who actually thought Kennedy was going to beat Batista, and go onto to WM23, are part of the anti. I'm getting sick of seeing those 50's style guys beat London and Kendrick every week, but you know it's just leading to London and Kendrick beating them at No Way Out, so whatever. Taker beating the living crap out of jobbers all the way to WM will bore me. Obvious staredown between Taker and Batista occurs at the end of show. Alright bunch, that's your Slapdown for the week. If I didn't entertain, annoy, or at least offend you, then at least I wasted your time. P.S. I'd like to give mad props to one Peyton Manning for making this happen. Well, I guess I could probably say the same for Rex Grossman, as he threw almost as many passes to the Colts as Peyton did, but whatever. Wevv who? Thanks Slappy, If you would like to share you thoughts on Slappy’s column, you can do so right HERE – The RWTB Feedback thread in the LOP forums Or you can email Slappy directly at:slappzilla@yahoo.com Now, for some news and rumors Hulk Hogan Out Of Wrestlemania 23 Hogan apparently tricked Johnny Ace’s secretary into releasing the names of possible Hall Of Fame inductees on the Bubba the Love Sponge show. In retaliation, Hogan has been dropped from WM23. I will honestly say that I think this sucks. I was looking forward to seeing Big Show vs Hogan. I know, there were rumors going around about the guy facing Khali or even Shane McMahon, but come on. Big Show is injured, but he’s taken time off to heal and there is a good chance that he will be ready by March. Hogan stole the show at Summerslam two years ago, and yes I do think he has another match in him. It’s Hogan. He will show up, the place will go nuts, and that’s all you really want from Hogan. Nostalgia and there’s nobody who can get the same reaction or work a crowd like Hogan. I know I’m in the minority, but I have no shame in admitting that I’m a fan of Hogan’s. That big orange bastard is the smartest man in wrestling, and well, I enjoy seeing him on my TV. In a wrestling ring. The guy can just play a crowd and that’s half the battle when it comes to angles and matches. Detroit is close to Canada, and well, after the fall out from Summerslam and add in Canadians, and well, there’s a good chance that WWE would get another monkey wrench thrown into their plans. Could be a bad thing, could be a good thing. One thing for sure, is that some fans have been complaining about WWE being too predictable and that scenario is one that sure wouldn't be. RVD Gone Well, not yet, but the rumor is going around that RVD will not renew his contract, which comes due this summer. If that is the case, it’s a big loss for WWE. RVD may not be a main eventer anymore, and only appears on ECW, but RVD was a fairly popular wrestler, and had a following. Losing RVD would immediately put a hit on ECW, as he is one of the guys that the old ECW fans cheer for. Finding a replacement will not be as easy as it sounds. RVD might go to TNA, and that, well, that more than likely means little, as from previous WWE wrestlers have shown. Slight bump in ratings, and then back to the level they were at. RVD would have some good potential match ups, but I think it’s more in the way he’s used. If Russo is still there, you just never know. He could have some pointy ears stuck on him and be the wrestling Vulcan. There’s still plenty of time to reach an agreement, so again, anything could happen. And with that, it’s time to call it an end. Quick Plugs and off to another thrilling week of work. Quick Plugs! LOP Forums Sports news! E-feds! Insulting strangers! Raging Politcal Debates! Video Game Discussion! Movie Talk! Oh, and Wrestling! Plenty of Wrestling! Sign Up Today! LOP Column’s Forum Wrestling columns and discussion. The Movie Bar! Movie news and clips! The Project Home of excellent writing, a forum for intelligent discussion about todays events. Social discussions as well. Very educational video about spiders is now on the mainpage. Check it out and learn something. The PWA Best E-Fed on the net. Period. That's all for today. Thanks For Readin' And Thanks For Ridin' Peyton Manning Please label all feedback as "FEEDBACK". Thank you. Email mrwevv@mac.com *NEW GALLERY* Very HOT and Up Close Shots of the WWE Divas! WOW!
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