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Submitted by Xan on Saturday, December 16, 2006 at 4:00 PM EST
 "People don't like the true and the simple; they like fairy tales and humbug."--Edmund and Jules de Goncourt Total Nonstop Action is now airing in a prime time spot on Thursday nights that is pretty much right in Smackdown's old timeslot, and yet I still hear some grumbling from time to time that Spike should give them a spot on Monday nights so they can go head to head against RAW and my response to this is always the same, "Um...why?" This would probably be suicide for TNA, so it certainly can't be because people think it would help the promotion. I think it's because people are buying too much into the myth that the Attitude Era in the WWF came about because of Eric Bischoff's and Ted Turner's decision to put a show on Mondays opposite RAW. Now, when I call it a myth, I want you to understand that I'm not saying it's inherently untrue. People have a misconception about what a myth is. Myths are stories we tell ourselves that we believe to be true. Are they true? Not always; it's the belief that's important. Personally, I don't believe that the "Monday Night Wars" are what led to the revival of the WWF. I know, that sounds nuts, right? Well, think about it. The other theory you always hear is that wrestling is cyclical, and, logically, both things can't be true. Either Vince McMahon caught lightning in a bottle once with Hogan, once with Austin, and will again; or there's only been one boom and the Attitude Era happened because of the competition with WCW. Since I believe wrestling is cyclical, the other simply cannot be true. That doesn't mean that the WWF didn't still wasn't better because of the competition with WCW; clearly it was more enjoyable once the brands were competing with each other, but that had less to do with the shows being on opposite each other than the simple fact that Bischoff was willing to steal stars from the WWF and run controversial, never seen before angles, so the WWF followed suit. I'm going to say this again, because it's important: The fact that Nitro and RAW were on at the same time had little to do with the competition between the brands. This is for a simple enough reason: they weren't on at the same time, and the way Spike is running their programming, neither would Impact! and RAW. I know you're all thinking I'm a crazy person right about now, but please, hear me out. RAW has always aired at 8 o'clock on Monday nights. Nitro didn't. Nitro always aired at 7 o'clock to the best of my recollection. I could be wrong on that; they might have actually gone head to head with RAW at one point, but I think they ran from 7 to 9 until they went to three hours. Either way, here's the point: Nitro always aired twice. Usually on TNT Monday nights it was Nitro/Thunder in Paradise/Nitro, so the choice was always easy for me. Why the hell would I watch Nitro at 7 when I could watch it at 11 or so? Impact! has the same issue right now. I happened to watch it this past Thursday night, but I didn't have to if I wanted to see it. "Allah obligeth no man to more than he hath given him the ability to perform."--The Koran Is this a problem? I don't know, but it certainly doesn't make for what I'd call a competition...much less a war, and honestly, in this day and age do we really care what time a television show is broadcast? With VCRS, DVD Recorders, DVRs, and most networks offering at least a handful of shows to be viewed on their websites, we can watch a show pretty much whenever we want to, so what difference could it possibly make to RAW's or Impact!'s ratings to be broadcast at the same time? If you like both shows, you're going to do one of three things. Either you tape RAW and watch Impact!, do the reverse, or watch RAW and catch the replay of Impact! It's not like you have to actually choose between the shows, and personally, as uninteresting as RAW has been lately, I can't see myself ever choosing to watch Impact! ahead of it. That could change if Rob Van Dam and/or Chris Jericho go to TNA and they get a two-hour program, of course, but as it stands now there's no chance. There's no such thing as a war between RAW and Impact! It would be like running the Arena Football League head to head with the NFL. Look, I'm not saying the AFL has terrible players and it isn't fun to watch. It is, but there's no way in the world it's ever going to compete with the NFL. It would get killed, easily. Same thing here. TNA's got guys with talent, but they're running up against the name recognition of the WWF, and even when its competition had Nash, Hall, and Hogan running the joint, no one ever really thought that the WWF was the inferior product, did they? The thing with Vince McMahon is he's always known how to turn wrestlers into stars; the other companies just know how to steal 'em. As I mentioned in Porridge, the WWF has done much better at turning another organization's failures or missed opportunities into gold than their competition has, and while they haven't taken much talent from TNA, TNA hasn't been able to do much with those they have acquired. So Christian's an undefeated former World Champion. How's that helped them? They signed Kurt Angle and have promptly done the best job of fucking up a dream situation since the Invasion angle in 2001. They had the tag team that I consider the best of all time and just broke them up about two years late with no foreseeable upside, and have managed to make what was their strongest selling point--the X division--look like absolute crap. "The way to prevent war is to bend every energy toward preventing it, not to proceed by the dubious indirection of preparing for it."--Max Lerner Granted, the WWF isn't gangbusters right now, either, but this is the company that the WWF is supposed to improve to compete head to head with? I'm sorry, but you have got to be kidding. I agree with the fact that TNA has a superior in-ring product to the WWF, for the most part, but as much as we hate to admit it, it isn't the in-ring stuff that sells us on the matches and buying the events--it's the story. As long as the WWF is able to tell us better stories than their competition, and thus makes us care more about their wrestlers at a quicker pace than TNA does, they'll never have to seriously worry about Total Nonstop Action, whether it's on Monday night or any other night of the week. There was a time I thought TNA really was the better organization, but since then I've seen them mismanage every one of their divisions, keep an aging wrestler who was never really a superstar to begin with at or near the top, overspend on a fading superstar who was unable to help their ratings or buys, and get rid of the weekly pay per views that made them so much fun to watch. There's no way this company wants a real war with the WWF, no matter what VKM's $1 Million challenge may say. In order to win one, you have to be able to stand and fight. After over 4 years, this company is still learning how to crawl. So, for those of you who want Spike to put TNA on Monday's directly opposite RAW, ask yourself why, because the only thing that move would do is sign TNA's death warrant and I don't think you really want to be back to the WWF having a monopoly on televised wrestling. On the other hand, with Kurt Angle and Christian taking up half of each Impact! maybe you wouldn't notice the difference. RAW's real war is with itself, because I only have so many recording devices and it's nearly time for 24 to start back up again. I play league poker most Monday nights and end up watching my tapes/discs of RAW, Heroes, and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip when I get home. Even though I've been a wrestling fan for just shy of 20 years now, you can bet your bottom dime that I'm not going to skip the best show on television for it; nor will I let Heroes or Studio 60 go by the wayside for the crap that RAW is turning out. The most interesting things going on there right now are the Eugene turn and the various tag teams reforming. Unfortunately, that's about 1/4 of the show--tops, so unless the WWF can find a way to make the rest of the show (read the DX/RKO segments and John Cena segments) as interesting as the midcard, they might as well not even bother gearing up, because the only war on Mondays I'm going to care about is the one Jack Bauer has been waging on terror for the last 5 years running. Long days, pleasant nights Points of Light El Dandy vs. XanMan You can vote for who you think was better by clicking Here. That will conclude today's voyage on The Northern Star. For feedback, please email me at XanManX@hotmail.com, with the words "Northern Star" or "feedback" in the subject line or click here to leave your thoughts in the LOPForums. The Northern Star will rise again.> Until then, Be well. *NEW GALLERY* Must SEE VERY HOT Pix of G4 TV's Olivia Munn! WHOA!!
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