DaveyBoy’s Wrestling Menu – ECW PPV Review + WrestleMania 23 Predictions
Submitted by DaveyBoy on Wednesday, December 6, 2006 at 12:04 AM EST
THE WRESTLING MENU #208
Welcome one and all to the 208th edition of The Wrestling Menu, the column that is sure to satisfy your taste buds when it comes to discussing all things wrestling.
On top of my review of the 'December To Dismember' pay-per-view, today sees my much-anticipated (going by the amount of emails I have received over the past month or so) booking of the WrestleMania 23 card in about 4 months time. It is actually quite strange in that I wanted to do it earlier than this, but didn't really have a great deal of ideas come into my mind. But then when I looked at the date I posted the corresponding column last year, it was practically exactly the same date (Dec-7, '05).
I can't say that my strike rate over the previous 3 years that I have attempted to book the WrestleMania card has been very good, but then I don't think anyone should expect it to be when I try to list the card some 4 months in advance. It's more a column to get discussion started amongst fans, as well as minds ticking over concerning what directions the WWE should or shouldn't head in.
But I sometimes hit the mark in amongst many misses. While it may have seemed like obvious match-ups to some, I got the Cena vs Triple H & Angle vs HBK match-ups correct last year. I also predicted that the Money In The Bank Ladder Match would be inter-brand last year, when it hadn't really been discussed at the time. I also am sometimes a little too futuristic with my foresight. A good example of this was the match I probably got the most negative feedback over last year; The Undertaker vs Ken Kennedy. I was about 6 months too soon with that one unfortunately!
As per usual, I am sure to get my fair share of positive & negative feedback. That is only to be expected due to the fact that a wide variety of fans want to see a wide variety of things when it comes to what is undoubtedly the biggest & most important event on the professional wrestling calendar. But I genuinely believe that my card outlined below in the 'Main' & 'Dessert' sections of this column is not only quite realistic, but one that would sell extremely well.
Anyway, I've probably crapped on enough. First, I'll review the first ever pay-per-view from the WWE's version of the ECW brand & then I'll get stuck into what I believe WrestleMania 23 should look like come April Fools Day next year!
On with the show.....
APPETIZERS
December To Dismember Review
For those that cannot recall my previous PPV review columns, this is the key that explains what the final PPV Rating means:
<50: Ask for a refund for not only your money, but also your time. [F] (Armageddon '04)
50-54: Mediocre & disappointing. [D] (EG: Royal Rumble '06)
55-59: Average. [C] (EG: Cyber Sunday '06)
60-64: Worth A Watch. [C+] (EG: No Mercy '06)
65-69: Good event that was worth the money. [B] (EG: Survivor Series '06)
70-74: Very good. [B+] (EG: Unforgiven '06)
75-79: Make sure you add this ppv to your video or dvd collection. [A] (EG: One Night Stand '05)
80+ : Make sure that the video or dvd is locked in a safe & cannot be erased. Memorable. [A+]
THE HARDYZ defeated MnM: While this bout would usually be the perfect opener, I wouldn’t have thought it would have kicked off proceedings here with the lack of a promoted card. While the crowd cheer loudly for the faces, Matt & Mercury begin at a methodical pace that tells me this is going 15 minutes plus. The Hardyz eventually get in some double-team maneuvers, until Nitro stems the tide with a nice jaw-breaker counter. Matt halts his climb to the top-rope though with a great Splash Mountain into a Powerbomb! Through some timely interference, Melina restores control for the heels, resulting in their turn for some solid double-team performances on an isolated Matt. Jeff finally gets the hot tag & the bout breaks down with all men taking turns in leaping to the outside. Back in the ring, The Hardyz go for their combo finishers, but Nitro saves Mercury in the nick of time.
MnM isolate Jeff next with some solid 1 on 1 & 2 on 1 action. A Whisper In The Wind out of nowhere allows Jeff to tag in his brother though & Matt cleans house with multiple side-effects & his middle rope leg-drop for a 2 count. Nitro stems the tide with an interesting hurracanrana, but The Hardyz regain control with simultaneous superplexes. Some Melina interference then backfires as Nitro perfectly dropkicks her & Jeff rolls him up for a super close 2 count. MnM then hit their snapshot finisher on Jeff, but Matt breaks up the pinfall at 2. MnM then go for a top-rope snapshot on Jeff, but Matt counters with a 2 man neck-breaker (almost a stunner) variation from the top, before Jeff finishes things off by hitting his swanton on both men at once at the 22 minute mark.
Old-school structured tag-team match (heels isolating a face in between periodic up-tempo moments) which seemed refreshing because we haven’t seen one for so long. Some fans may have felt this bout was too methodically paced or didn’t contain enough spots. That’s a fair argument, but the action was solid throughout & while the pace was practically never break-neck, the match was never boring. If anything, I would have preferred a touch less isolation work & a little more action, but I can’t be too hypocritical with the division. I also thought there was a very good mix of singles action & double-teaming over the duration of the bout. Jeff Hardy wasn’t in his greatest form here (he looked messy on a couple of moves, while totally missing another), but it wasn’t anything too bad to ruin the match. I still think this should not have been the opener (the pace & duration play a part there as well), but overall this was solid, involving & entertaining. Match Rating…8
BALLZ MAHONEY defeated MATT STRIKER: Prior to the bout Striker does some mic work where he stresses to the referee which rules are to be strictly adhered to. As a result, Ballz shows us some technical wrestling ability to begin with. The wrestling teacher then breaks some rules of his own to regain control, predominantly targeting Ballz’ arm. This doesn’t allow the face to piece together any successive offensive moves, with Striker close to getting a submission victory with a fujiwara arm bar. Following a succession of punches though, Ballz hits a powerbomb from nowhere & gets the pinfall at the 7 minute mark. Hard to care much for this match-up, but the 2 tried hard to put forward a story & it predominantly worked. The booking around Ballz’ lack of wrestling moves was wise & when the moves ran out, the match simply ended. Better than I expected, but the lack of a build-up really hurt it. I’ll be nice….. Match Rating…6
ELIJAH BURKE & SYLVESTER TERKAY defeated LITTLE GUIDO & TONY MAMALUKE: Hey, I predicted a match-up correctly! Burke schools Guido to begin with, but it isn’t long before Guido gains revenge by embarrassing the rookie. The FBI follows up with some double-teaming, until Terkay is tagged in & uses his strength to dominate. The heels then isolate Guido for a while, before the hot tag to Mamaluke who does decently in attempting to get the crowd back on side with a few crisp dropkicks. Guido is taken out soon after though & Mamaluke is easy pickings for the heels, with Burke getting the pinfall with the Elijah Experience (Stroke) at the 6 minute mark. Standard tag match that was basically a television bout. With no build-up, it was hard to get involved in, while there was no real story during the bout either. Burke showed some glimpses of talent (while Terkay wasn’t terrible), but this was very generic with the FBI getting hardly any offense. Not a passable ppv bout. Match Rating…4.5
DAIVARI defeated TOMMY DREAMER: The Great Khali’s presence alone is enough to allow Daivari to get in some offense in the opening minutes, although Dreamer dominates for the most part. Khali then gets directly involved & is ejected. Daivari takes advantage of Tommy being hurt by going for multiple restholds, but it always felt inevitable that Dreamer would counter something & then regain control. He does, but gets pushed off the top-rope allowing Daivari to perform a terrible looking missed cross-body block. Dreamer then hits a (slow) dropkick to Daivari’s face while he is tied in the tree of woe. Soon after, Daivari rolls Dreamer up for the pinfall in a ridiculously booked finish at the 7 minute mark! Started half decently, but totally fell apart after Khali was sent to the back! The terrible & unrealistic finish capped off unimpressive offense by Daivari, while Dreamer looked unfit to me. I expected more from these 2. Just bad! Match Rating…4
KEVIN THORN & ARIEL defeated MIKE KNOX & KELLY KELLY: Interesting match-up here with 3 heels taking part with 1 face that can’t wrestle! The 2 men begin with rather standard big man offense, with big lariats by each man being the highlight. The 2 slow it down further (if that was possible) until Ariel tags herself in, forcing Kelly into the ring. Ariel, who basically wrestles in a thong, dominates the blonde (who can’t wrestle at all). And when Kelly somehow makes it near a tag, Knox walks away leaving Ariel to sit on her face for the pinfall at a little over 7 minutes. The post-match beating of Kelly (what was the point?) is interrupted by The Sandman & numerous cane shots. Terrible match that totally wasted any skills that Knox & Thorn have. Meanwhile, Kelly has no place in the ring, while Ariel tried hard & dressed impressively. Just horrible… 1 point for the lariats & another for Ariel’s a$$! Match Rating…2
BOBBY LASHLEY defeated THE BIG SHOW, TEST, ROB VAN DAM, HARDCORE HOLLY & CM PUNK in an Extreme Elimination Chamber to Win the ECW World Title: Following an earlier backstage attack, Sabu is replaced by Hardcore Holly! Some mic work from Paul Heyman & the entrances take approximately 20 minutes before RVD & Holly kick things off. The steel ringside area sees most of the action in the opening 5 minutes with a rolling thunder variation the highlight. The first man to be released from his pod is CM Punk & he immediately brings some extra energy to the bout (through a combination of his actions & crowd response). Holly wisely stays down for a while allowing RVD & Punk to put on some nice offense (predominantly using the chair). Holly then counters a Punk hurracanrana into the chain links to get in some offense of his own, the highlight being a superplex.
The 4th man into the contest is Test with a crowbar, as he immediately targets a bloodied RVD. But Van Dam fights back with some chair-based offense & a Van Daminator combined with a 5 Star Frog Splash sees the opening pinfall on CM Punk at the 12 minute mark. Holly is eliminated soon after (in a botched pinfall) by a Test big boot. And then with a little help from TBS, Test flies with an elbow from the top of a pod on to a chair-covered RVD for the next elimination! Following about 90 seconds of Test waiting, Lashley is supposed to be removed from his pod next, but Heyman’s security prevent his release, until big Bobby uses his table to break the chain-links at the top of his pod. It’s high impact from both big men, with Lashley getting the pin at the 19 minute mark. More waiting precedes TBS entering with his barbed-wire baseball bat. The challenger seemingly takes control as he throws TBS through a pod & busts him open. But his offense doesn’t last long as Show lifts his intensity & sets up a chokeslam. Lashley impressively counters into a DDT though & soon after wins the title following a spear at the 25 minute mark.
For a 25 minute match consisting of 6 men, there was a little too much dead time in this bout (4-5 minutes). Having said that, the remainder of the bout was entertaining. The problem was that it could have been a lot more entertaining. The absence of Sabu (& addition of Holly) really hurt the match quality, because even in short bursts, Sabu would have added more entertainment. The opening stanza was solid if nothing special, while the action from Punk & RVD was terrific & they deserved to last longer in the match on that alone. I was fairly impressed with Test’s contribution, while the Lashley & Big Show encounter was decently handled, despite being solely 1 on 1 stuff & looking too rehearsed. The problem here was that it all should have been stretched out more. If they were worried about the stamina of the larger 3 men, it’s easy to book them to lie on the ground while the likes of RVD & Punk do more work. Hard to rate, as it was easily entertaining enough for a ppv main-event, but didn’t stand out from other EC matches, despite the possibility of it doing so. Match Rating…8
PPV RATING (32.5/60) = 54
Looking at the key, I have basically given 'December To Dismember' a 'D' grade & said that it was ‘mediocre & disappointing‘. I think that grade & comment is right on the mark, as while a good majority of the event would have put this right up there with the worst ppv events ever, there were 2 entertaining matches that took up 47 minutes of wrestling time. Sure, both those bouts could have been even better, but at the end of the day, they were still entertaining. Speaking of time & minutes, it was indeed a disgrace that the entire event lasted only 135 minutes & fans are entitled to feel short-changed here. If I had any sort of intangibles installed in my PPV ratings system, it would have surely marked low/negative because of that. But what really shone out with this card is (a) that the depth of the ECW roster is not deep (no-one really stepped up & impressed), while (b) it’s bordering on stupidity that the WWE think that it’s actually wise to only list & promote the main matches for any pay-per-view! Oh, and while I may be in the minority, I still disagree with having the long promoted tag match as the opener.
WrestleMania 23 Booking
While recent history makes me think that there may only be 9 matches on the WrestleMania 23 card in April of next year, I have booked 10 bouts & genuinely think that this quantity of matches can easily fit into the almost 4 hour duration of the event. As I said in the introduction to this column, I genuinely believe my card to be a strong one & have attempted to prove this by breaking the card down into halves. The first half listed in the 'Main' section is what I believe to be the 5 bouts that will arguably (for want of better wording) sell the card to a large extent. But then take a look at the other 5 matches I have booked in the 'Dessert' section & you will hopefully see the excellent depth & quality of the card I have put together.
MAIN - The 5 Main Attractions
JOHN CENA (with EMINEM) vs RANDY ORTON (with KEVIN FEDERLINE): I know the match-up of Cena & Orton is one that divides opinions amongst wrestling fans & I can clearly see why it would. Quite simply, the match quality may not be all that good. But if it was to be hyped up somehow, then I am almost certain it would be more than satisfactory. And this is where I have taken the liberty (only 1 of 2 on my whole card) of doing something that can be classified as against-the-odds come April. And that is to add both Eminem & Kevin Federline to the equation as corner men.
With WrestleMania 23 emanating from Eminem's hometown of Detroit & Mr.Mathers not being as hot as he once was in the music industry, I just feel that it's something that is too good to miss out on & can help both parties. He wouldn't come cheap, but could you imagine the mainstream attention that it would get the WWE!?!?!? It would blow what they have now with K-Fed out of the water, yet he too could play a very important role here as well. I seriously believe that with those 2 involved, this could main-event with no title on the line. Cena would get the win with a huge assist from Eminem of course!
EDGE vs TRIPLE H for the WWE Championship: I think this match will occur... It's just a matter of whether it is for the WWE Championship or not. If the Cena vs Orton match-up has the added attention of other parties, then the title only elevates this bout further... To the point where this could still be the main-event of the night despite the appearance of those "stars" in another bout. And it wouldn't be too difficult to get the title back on to Edge between now & April.
These 2 practically have a feud going as we speak, but because Orton & HBK are also involved, it is not putting the attention solely on these 2 main-eventers. Thus, this match-up will still appear to be relatively fresh come 4 months time. I have no reason to doubt that these 2 could also put on a good wrestling match come the night, with the result very much a 50-50 proposition. I'd probably have Edge retain the title myself, but it's much of a muchness.
BATISTA vs KEN KENNEDY for the World HeavyWeight Title: This was the match (which can arguably not be classified in the 5 main attractions) that I admittedly had the most trouble booking. I don't think the WWE can successfully keep the Booker vs Batista feud going until next April, although it's arguable that Booker (or even JBL) can take part in a triple-threat match here. The other option here is to have The Undertaker face Batista for the title, but I feel that unsettles the card a little.
So what I have done is gone against my own 'patience theory' here & thrust Ken Kennedy into a co-main event on the biggest card of the year. As I keep saying, KK continues to improve on his character & I am almost certain that the WWE love his progression right now. Meanwhile, he is fairly solid in the ring. Solid may not be good enough to drag a great match out of Batista, but let's be honest, with the short duration given to the corresponding bout at WrestleMania 22, then these 2 could easily put on something that is more than decent over 8-10 minutes. I probably would have Batista retain the title here, although I wouldn't be surprised if the upset win was to take place, as Kennedy is going places for mine.
HULK HOGAN vs THE BIG SHOW: While Hulk Hogan vs 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin will always be the dream match for many, it's going to be a difficult bout to put together with the 2 egos involved. Conversely, Hogan & The Big Show are good friends & still keep in contact from all reports. Seeing as though WrestleMania 23 is the 20th anniversary of Hogan's memorable bout against Andre The Giant (also held in Detroit), this match-up has history on it's side & can actually be put together easily enough.
With The Big Show being a clearly defined heel, fans will be in raptures for the legendary Hogan & the match pretty much books itself come the night. The set-up for the bout wouldn't take much imagination either, although I'm unsure how eager Hogan would be too appear on the 3rd highest rated WWE show. But the WWE would definitely like it & it may even get ECW's ratings up near the 2.0 mark in the United States once more. Sure, it wouldn't be a great match, but it would be very nostalgic in a way. Hogan wins I suppose... He usually does.
MICK FOLEY vs VINCE McMAHON in a No Disqualification Streetfight: This match-up has been in my mind ever since the "firing" angle involving Mick from earlier this year. It just seems to make sense to me & is a bout that you would have thought should have taken place already, but hasn't from memory. Well, they may as well take advantage of it while they still can (ie: while Foley can still walk & while Vince is still sane).
There wouldn't have to be a great deal go into the booking of this bout due to the past, while it would surely lead to some entertaining promos & segments leading up to WrestleMania. The only real problem is that neither of them would wrestle much in the weeks leading up to the event, but considering that the brutality of the bout would be put over huge, I think there are ways around that. For those that feel that 'Stone Cold' Steve Austin simply must be on the card (I have my doubts), then he could even be the special guest referee here. Without Austin, I think I would strangely prefer to see Vinnie Mac emerge victorious here!
DESSERT - The 5 To Add Depth
SHAWN MICHAELS vs CARLITO vs JEFF HARDY vs JOHNNY NITRO vs SHELTON BENJAMIN vs KENNY DOANE in a Money In The Bank Ladder Match: While the WWE will most likely play it safe & spread out the talent on this card better by once more having this contest be an inter-brand match, I actually feel that it would be better suited to once more go back to being a Raw only showcase. This is due to the changes in the rosters since last year. In fact, I would argue that with the possible exception of HBK (for other reasons), the remaining 5 combatants are the best suited to this match of all the WWE rosters! Sabu, Rob Van Dam & Matt Hardy definitely come into consideration, but not many others. Hell, it shouldn't be forgotten that Super Crazy is also on the Raw roster & would also fit in well here.
Although he might not, I like the idea of including HBK here & feel he may be involved in a feud against a protege of sorts in Johnny Nitro come mid next year. And for those of you who are bound to remind me that the InterContinental title has not been defended on a WrestleMania card in quite some time, you could even make this match for that title (any one of the 6 could enter as champion). If that was the case, I'd even throw Ricky 'The Dragon' Steamboat into the mix as the special guest whatever for this bout which would be taking place 20 years after his tremendous IC Title match against Randy 'Macho Man' Savage at WrestleMania 3.
KING BOOKER, FINLAY & CHAVO GUERRERO vs CHRIS BENOIT, KANE & A MYSTERY PARTNER (CHRIS JERICHO): It should be noted that I originally had this as a tag-team match that excluded Kane & Finlay... But they both deserve to be on the card. This is the 2nd of my against-the-odds booking ideas, but once more it is possible if the WWE were to chase it. The booking is vital here for it to work. Chris Benoit is currently feuding with Chavo Guerrero as we speak, so that history is there. In my opinion, he is most likely to move on to feuding with either Finlay and/or Booker in December or January. The positive thing here is that there is time for both feuds to take place within a 4 month timespan if needed. Kane will most probably be the face to feud with the wrestler that Benoit is not feuding with at the particular time.
I would go the mystery opponent route, but here is where it needs to be booked wisely. The WWE need to make out as if the mystery opponent will be Rey Mysterio. They can show him rehabbing at first in vignettes and then progressing through to his training as time moves along. Even a backstage segment involving Rey on the night would come in handy. But come match time, it would be Jericho that would emerge as the mystery partner & target all 3 heels (as well as Queen Sharmell) in his usual cocky & entertaining way. With those 6 involved, the match should definitely be quite good & it's almost irrelevant who would get the win.
BOBBY LASHLEY vs ROB VAN DAM vs CM PUNK vs SABU in a Fatal Fourway Match for the ECW World Title: With The Big Show kept busy elsewhere & no other heel in ECW (Test or Hardcore Holly) doing much for me, I've overbooked this match for the title. I just presume that if you are going to overbook the bout, then you may as well do it good & proper. So why not have 4 faces go at it? I'm not sure the dynamic would work to be honest, but it could be worth a try & if it was to be booked to be super entertaining, then it could work well on the card if kept away from the Money In The Bank Ladder Match.
I would probably take some variation to this bout without much trouble. It could be a triple threat match with one wrestler left off it. There may be a heel turn before April 2007 comes around. Or preferably, a combination of both may be the best outcome. This match in any format will most likely be kept short at approximately 8-10 minutes & I think that would be wise for the sake of match quality. This could also be the best time & place for CM Punk to be crowned ECW World Champion. Any time sooner may be too soon.
THE UNDERTAKER vs UMAGA: If this is the 9th best match on the card, then I think I have something going for my booking! After all, this bout could be between a wrestler that has been undefeated on WWE programming for almost a year against a wrestler that has remained undefeated at WrestleMania for over a decade & a half! While it realistically will not be the only true inter-brand match on the card, I think it is the most obvious inter-brand match-up to take place as the current rosters stand.
While the match quality would not be earth-shattering, I think the reason behind the match (battle of the streaks) will help it. While Umaga is also a wrestler that brings a fair bit more variety to the table than the average big man that The Undertaker tends to wrestle. I would like to see a close & competitive 10-12 minute match which would see the dead man remain undefeated at WrestleMania (with a possible match against Edge in another battle of streaks to take place at WrestleMania 24 in 2008)!
MICKIE JAMES vs MELINA for the Women's Title: I sort of listed a Women's Title match by habit initially, but the more I think about it, there is no reason why this cannot be left off the card. This is especially the case if the depth of the division continues to spiral downwards as it currently is. But this will most likely be on the card somewhere as a change of pace over such a long duration. As per usual, it will also most likely be placed following a long & eventful bout.
Mickie & Melina look to be at the top of the tree when it comes to women wrestlers, but that could change if Jillian Hall moves over to Raw & has her character tweaked a little. Beth Phoenix also shouldn't be forgotten if she returns from injury successfully. Whoever is in the match, it should be kept rather short & it's almost impossible to predict a winner this far out.
Ok, so there is the current WrestleMania 23 card according to me. There are a few unlucky wrestlers to not receive a spot on the card (& resulting pay-day), and I'm certain some of them will be placed into some sort of match prior to the event which will end up as a DVD extra. Amongst those that I have somehow chosen to leave out (who could have a strong case made for them) are the likes of Ric Flair, Matt Hardy, Cryme Tyme, Paul London, Test, MVP, Kevin Thorne & quite possibly Monty Brown. Apologies to all those wrestlers plus a few more.
So anyway... Am I dreaming that this is a good & realistic WrestleMania card...??? Let me know via feedback & if you have any better ideas, I will even include it in my column next week. Last year, a few match-ups came out of reader feedback that I really liked & chances are that will happen again this week. So get those ideas into me ASAP, whether it be individual matches or the entire card. My email address is DaveyBoy123@bigpond.com, but if you are an LOP Forums member, it would be much appreciated if you could leave feedback on my thread at http://www.lopforums.com/showthread.php?t=217&page=2 so other forum members can also get a few ideas.
Next Wednesday in 'The Wrestling Menu', I will obviously include feedback to my WrestleMania 23 card, as well as the best of your ideas for the big dance on April Fools Day. Furthermore, it's once more time for another pay-per-view event believe it or not, so I will have my predictions for Armageddon. As per usual, my column will be posted at the same Wednesday time on the same LOP channel. Until then, this is DaveyBoy signing off & asking you to remember that dinner is best served in 3 courses.
DaveyBoy’s Wrestling Menu. 2002-2006
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