DaveyBoy’s Wrestling Menu – No Mercy Review, Test + Booking Kurt In TNA
Submitted by DaveyBoy on Wednesday, October 11, 2006 at 12:42 AM EST
THE WRESTLING MENU #197
Welcome one and all to the 197th edition of The Wrestling Menu, the column that is sure to satisfy your taste buds when it comes to discussing all things wrestling.
Before I begin, thank-you to everyone who took the time to read my column from last Wednesday. It seems to have been a very popular one which proves that Kurt Angle’s move to TNA has indeed captured the imagination of professional wrestling fans. Either that or everyone was eager to see my ‘No Mercy’ predictions… LOL. But further special thanks go to all those readers that emailed me thanking me for writing a column each & every Wednesday for the past year. I really appreciate that & can only reply with “You’re Welcome”. If you have yet to read that column & would like to do so, you still may by clicking on the following link: http://www.lordsofpain.net/news/2006_/articles/1159944263.php
Speaking of my weekly streak, it is indeed continuing. But in further news regarding my insanity, oops I mean my column, I have roughly planned out my next 7 weeks worth of columns & guess what? You are going to get more than 7 columns!!! That’s right, not only do you get a column every Wednesday, but if you call & place your order now, you will get 2 bonus weekend editions of ‘The Wrestling Menu’ for free! What a bargain for you all.
Regarding column #200, I got a whole load of ideas for that milestone edition and while quite a few of those topics will most probably be used in the future, nothing really stood out to me for the big edition to be posted on November-1. However, I was very close to going with 2 of those ideas & I am planning on actually using one of them in 2 weeks time for #199. Well, a simplified version (to fit my column structure) of one of the ideas anyway. But for now, I will keep you in suspense on those plans.
Ok, this is going to be a rather long column, so I better stop waffling on & get… On with the show…..
APPETIZERS - Test
From memory, the weekly ECW show has been aired on Australian television for 5 or 6 weeks now. I can’t say that I go out of my way to view it, yet have somehow managed to see all but one of the episodes. The jury is still out on the brand for mine. There are improvements in some areas, but there is also a fair bit of work still to be done. But I don’t want to talk about the brand in general today. I want to talk about one specific part of it. One man in fact; Andrew Martin. More widely known as Test.
I remember reading of his re-signing by the WWE some 4 or 5 months back & it was rather ineffectual on me to be honest. I definitely wasn’t for it, but seeing as though he was being placed on the fledgling ECW roster, it didn’t bother me too much either. As I take many reports with a grain of salt to begin with, rumors of pushing him to main-event status on the brand were pretty much ignored by me & I simply figured he would be used in the midcard to predominantly elevate up & coming talent, if not ECW originals.
When I began reading the early recaps of him wrestling the occasional singles match, while tag-teaming with rookie Mike Knox, I thought that was perfect for him. As while Test has always struggled to break through to the main-event (or even upper midcard) in his previous stints with the WWE, he is not so bad that he shouldn’t be lurking around the midcard of a returning brand, whether it be in singles or tag-team action.
So when ECW finally hit my television screen early last month, I was more interested in Mike Knox than Test (partially because my Rookie Rankings were only 2 months away). But while Knox didn’t have much effect (positive or negative) on me, something in Test did. I actually couldn’t put my finger on it at first. He looked the same (maybe slightly better built if anything) & he was pulling off pretty much the same decent moves as always. But there was something that stood out positively to me. And in one or two other matches since, I couldn’t say that I worked it out either.
But then I saw Test in his main-event match against Rob Van Dam a week ago & I couldn’t help but be even more impressed. Seriously, this was a terrific bout that pretty much had it all. The combination of RVD’s athleticism, Test’s strength, some hardcore action, plus many nearfalls really impressed me. In fact, I would almost go as far as saying that I would rank this in the top 10 WWE television matches of this year. Kudos to all involved, including both competitors in the ring.
And with that match, I think I may have worked out what I liked more about Test; His attitude. And I mean that in both senses of the word. Firstly, his character is simply a no-nonsense type who doesn’t do much talking. And that character seems to have filtered in positively to his wrestling style. He is using big impact moves with better efficiency than previously. It seems to suit the style of the brand perfectly. Secondly, I’m going to take a guess & say that his real-life attitude has taken a change for the better as well. Whether it’s the second chance in the WWE or otherwise, Test seems to me to be doing what is asked for him for the good of the ECW brand. For mine, he is taking weapon shots & bumps that he may have refused to take in the past!
So, in conclusion, good on Test. He has been much-maligned in the past & still is by many fans. But he has come back on the WWE’s third brand & really made a significant positive contribution. As fans, we really cannot ask much more than that. And while I am handing out kudos, good on the WWE for identifying that Test could be a good thing for ECW & re-hiring him. It seems like a perfect fit for me & I’m wondering if his improvement now means that even diehard ECW fans wouldn’t be too upset with him being ECW Champion one day in the future.
MAIN
Booking Kurt Angle in TNA
I wrote a fair bit about Kurt Angle signing with TNA in my column last week (arguably 2 of the 3 topics) & one of the main things that I stated was how important the next couple of month’s worth of booking is for TNA. This is not only for their booking surrounding Kurt Angle, but also the promotion as a whole. This is due to the fact that Kurt Angle is most likely to get some WWE fans watching TNA to see him there, but one man can only hold such an audience for so long. It is the overall product that will keep them loyal in the long term.
For the most part, my general thoughts about Kurt Angle signing with TNA & my opinion of the talk of a war between the WWE & TNA being a little premature were shared by the many readers that emailed me over the past week. But some readers noticed that I didn’t go into any great detail concerning what TNA’s booking plans should be in the near future. That was for 2 reasons; (1) I am not an expert booker & do not get paid to do the job, and (2) I haven’t seen enough TNA over the past couple of months (let alone years) to know how best to use certain wrestlers & whatnot.
Some feedback suggested things here and there which sounded pretty good, but were clearly only one part of a large puzzle. But one loyal reader of mine went into great detail to outline 2-3 month’s worth of how Kurt Angle should be booked upon debut. I must be honest & state that it didn’t jump out at me too much initially, but after some explanation from the reader & more thought from me, I think the booking is so good that it deserves to be shared with you all. Those reading my columns for a while will know that I very rarely post other people’s writing, so high praise should go to StarkMan here for presenting his thoughts to me. All of the italic text below is the words of StarkMan. I will chime in with some of my own thoughts to end the topic following that:
Off the bat, Kurt Angle is NOT being booked right. He's insisting on the wrestling machine gimmick he had from ECW. Its fine for him to be the wrestling machine IN the ring, as the fans of TNA would demand no less. However he needs to go back to the "Its true, its true" gimmick to use what really got him over as a megastar; His incredible mic skills and somewhat goofy yet serious demeanor. He does NOT have to be a heel… He DOES have to be somewhat cocky and cut good promos to push up inferior talent (besides Samoa Joe and maybe Scott Steiner if fit… I think Kurt could easily carry someone like Steiner who has some technical ability behind the steroids).
If he could use his mic skills, face, heel or even Austin style tweener saying he's better than everyone, I think he's got a shot. Otherwise he’s going to be a whale in a goldfish tank, and when that happens the goldfish are crushed instantly and the whale dies slowly from lack of water. (For Example: Ric Flair in WWF take 1 or Hulk Hogan in WCW pre 96). He needs to be used to grow the talent in TNA, NOT be over it. This is done by selecting ONLY guys who are push ready and KEEPING them in that push. Which already gives us Mistake #2...Joe being pushed down into this hardcore feud with Raven, Abyss and Brother Runt.
This is how I would book Kurt Angle over the next couple of months: At the ‘Bound for Glory’ pay-per-view, his enforcer role should not be a heel turn, BUT should end up in a ‘No Contest’ of sorts.
On his ‘Impact’ television show debut, get a guy who can go 10 minutes with him in a competitive match, but not making him a weak opponent. I’d go with a Petey Williams or maybe even Senshi (although I do NOT want to devalue the X division by jobbing the champ so that depends on his BFG title match result). This should be a good paced, hard fought 10 minute match with Angle getting the duke by finisher (no run-ins).
Jim Cornette should then set up a 3 way match between Angle, Jeff Jarrett and Sting at the November ppv event. Over the next couple of weeks on ‘Impact’, have Angle cut those awesome promos, even going after TNA itself saying he's bigger than the fed. Now you go with a squash match or run in match to build the feud. Then, on the ‘Impact’ episode before the November ppv, have Kurt run in on Jarrett's match to save his opponent. This cements him as a bad ass face & making Jarrett tap afterwards would be the icing on the cake.
At the November ppv, I’d have Angle winning the title by pinning Double J. Sting then challenges the new TNA Champion saying he only beat one opponent & not the Stinger. The next week on Impact, let there be the second big title match in TNA within 7 days & during a good wrestling match (watch that groin… No Scorpion Death-Locks), have Kurt make Stinger tap to the ankle lock.
On the following weeks ‘Impact’, have Angle do the invitational gimmick, but with a twist; Make him state that “no TNA wrestler is good enough to go 10 minutes with him. He is bigger than the fed...” I think this would make him a bad a$$ tweener because in their hearts they know he's right except for one man. Enter Jim Cornette... Who introduces that one man... SAMOA JOE… His opponent at the next ppv in December!
But before then, we have the Invitational Matches. The first should be Angle making SharkBoy cry for his mommy in less than a minute (bye bye TNA's folk hero). The second should be against fellow tweener Eric Young. Kurt would make him tap after a quick back and forth match where he toys with Eric a little and lets him get a move in here and there. But following the match let Joe run out & choke out Angle to show that he is a threat.
In the third of his invitationals, have Cornette come out and introduces the face of TNA; AJ Styles! Let this be a 4 star match where Styles goes the distance with the clock running out while he is braving the ankle lock (watch the neck… No Styles Clash) to put over TNA and having Angle give some respect to the promotion (handshake and hand raise). Due to the 10 minute invitational format, no title change takes place. After the respect, he shoots a promo on Samoa Joe and they do a pull-apart brawl to end the show with the crowd now split between the 2 of them.
Finally, at the December pay-per-view, Kurt Angle & Samoa Joe wrestle in a 5 Star Classic. This has to last at least 30 minutes… Maybe even 45. I’m talking Flair vs Steamboat quality, with both men avoiding their opponent’s finishers time after time. Angle retains the title and embraces TNA as his new home with a heartfelt respect promo after the match. Now that he accepts TNA, he can be the face of TNA & the HeavyWeight Division can be lined up in whatever order TNA sees fit.
The likes of Jarrett, Christian (could be the launching pad he needs), Styles, Daniels & Senshi (I think the 2 styles could create a great match) could all take place, with the obvious Samoa Joe rematch in there somewhere. Let that run go as far as it can with QUALITY over quantity, so leave the Bobby Roodes and Monte Browns out of this. Also keep Abyss away, as I think that Angle doesn’t handle big hosses too well.
With all that, ratings should go up and you got a hit on your hands. Then, TNA need may only need one more guy to get the promotion all the way over... That man should be Jericho if they have enough bamboo in the Panda to get it done!
Just a little closing note or two on this, I deliberately left Scott Steiner out of the first two months worth of booking as I heard some injury news about him. If he is around & fit though, I would definitely put him somewhere in the early going. I'd likely use him as the run-in man in the ‘Bound For Glory’ title match and use that to start a mini-feud between him & Angle. If TNA so desires, this could even be used to push the rest of the booking back by (no more than a) month. Also if you notice, in the Invitational angle I intentionally put in guys who could be called "TNA originals" (Petey Williams, Senshi, AJ Styles, Eric Young). The idea would be to give a rub to these guys and break a little bit free of the WCW redux complex TNA is known to get.
Ok, it’s DaveyBoy back again. What did you think…??? Like I said, this booking didn’t stick out to me a great deal initially. I’m not altogether sure why, but I think it had to do with Angle getting the title so quickly & using the Kurt Angle Invitational. But the more I thought about it, the more I liked StarkMan’s booking. There is really good compromise between so many factors that come into play. Just the timing of Kurt Angle winning the World Title is one of those factors. I don’t think it should be rushed, but I can already hear the WWE fans rubbishing TNA if he doesn’t win it soon enough. StarkMan’s booking is a nice balanced compromise between the 2 points of view.
Furthermore, the booking does suggest that TNA as a roster of wrestlers would be put over sufficiently & it will be for the overall good of the promotion. This would occur not only from Kurt Angle’s terrific in-ring work that we know he is capable of, but also from his microphone work that played a major part in pushing Angle so quickly into the WWE main-event scene upon debut. I like the booking a lot & thank StarkMan once more for allowing me to use this in my column. I hope you all thought it was worthy as well.
DESSERT – No Mercy Review
<50: Ask for a refund for not only your money, but also your time. [F] (Armageddon '04)
50-54: Mediocre & disappointing. [D] (EG: Royal Rumble '06)
55-59: Average. [C] (EG: New Years Revolution '06)
60-64: Worth A Watch. [C+] (EG: G A Bash '06)
65-69: Good event that was worth the money. [B] (EG: SummerSlam '06)
70-74: Very good. [B+] (EG: Unforgiven '06)
75-79: Make sure you add this ppv to your video or dvd collection. [A] (EG: One Night Stand '05)
80+ : Make sure that the video or dvd is locked in a safe & cannot be erased. Memorable. [A+]
MATT HARDY defeated GREGORY HELMS: I really liked the beginning first few minutes of this opening match as it contained some crisp & well-paced back & forth action. It was a great mix of everything too, as it included some mat-wrestling, aerial action & brawling that was all used to sell the ‘good friends, better enemies’ storyline. Following a flurry of Hardy offense that gets a 2 count, Helms hits 3 variations of the Unprettier (arguably a very safe version of his VertaBreaker), but they only get 2 counts as well. Hardy then counters a top-rope move & continues the theme by hitting 3 Side-Effects. But when he heads to the top for a moonsault, Helms gets his knees up into Matt’s ribs.
Not long later, Hardy kicks out of a Shining Wizard kick & then somehow reaches the ropes after receiving a Reverse Shining Wizard kick from the top-rope! The finishing sequence then sees a nice little collection of counters resulting in Hardy hitting the Twist Of Fate at the 13 minute mark for the pinfall. Terrific opener that was well booked & performed. This should result in these 2 well & truly establishing themselves in the SmackDown midcard. Some may feel I have over-rated this, but I really liked it that much! Match Rating…8
PAUL LONDON & BRIAN KENDRICK defeated KC JAMES & IDOL STEVENS to Retain the WWE Tag-Team Championships: Super frenetic opening to this bout where you could hardly blink without missing a move from the face champs. James & Stevens hardly had to do a thing in the opening 4 minutes, as London & Kendrick flew around the ring with almost no regard for their own bodies. The heels logically & predictably slow the pace down & ground the champs, but it wasn’t too boring & didn’t last too long anyway. Kendrick cleans house following a hot tag, but a James Superplex almost gets the upset pinfall. A couple of close 2 counts for both teams (plus a wardrobe malfunction for Michelle McCool) kicks off a rapid fire closing sequence that sees some nice double-teaming by the exciting champs result in Sliced Bread #2 from Kendrick & a Shooting Star Press (off the back of his partner) from London to gain the pinfall at a touch under 10 minutes. Entertaining bout that delivered a little more than expected & was well put together to last 10 minutes, but feel longer. Match Rating…7.5
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIZ SEGMENT: Teddy Long introduces Mike Mizanin, who gets a lap-dance from Diva Search winner Layla, but then falls for the predictable blindfold trick as Raw’s resident male stripper Big Dick Johnson emerges from a gift-wrapped box to continue the lap dance. Nothing but filler that was passable… until we had to see the a$$ of Big Dick! Approximately 8 minutes in length. Segment Rating…4
MONTEL VONTAVIOUS PORTER defeated MARTY GARNER: MVP emerges with an interesting wrestling outfit (think a jumpsuit similar to the one Flash Funk used to wear, but cut off well above the knees) that gets some “Power Ranger” chants from the live crowd. Garner is some skinny jobber that I can’t recall having seen before & the crowd continues to treat this match with the disrespect that it deserves. MVP cockily dominates for just under 3 minutes & then hits a strange sort of OverDrive move (sorry, but I can’t recall who previously used it as their finisher, but I have seen it & think it was called the OverDrive) for the pinfall. Even more filler than the segment that came before it. Very disappointing as Garner has no place being on ppv & someone like Scotty 2 Hotty would have been better placed here. Match Rating…3
KEN KENNEDY defeated THE UNDERTAKER by Disqualification: Mr Kennedy does his usual mic work before the match, but with a little more intensity & less confidence than usual. He then tries to hit & run to begin the bout, but gets caught with a big boot by ‘Taker who proceeds to target an arm. The cocky heel does get in some offense after countering Old School with a top-rope arm-drag, but soon after falls victim to the patented move & more methodical domination from the dead man. The momentum finally swings to the heel when the phenom misses a running big boot & gets hung up in the corner. This results in a few minutes of Kennedy’s aggressive, if unspectacular, offense which ends with a piledriver out of nowhere for a 2 count!
Kennedy then heads to resthold city, eventually leading into some decent, if elongated, back & forth action. This sequence comes to a close when The Undertaker gets driven head first into an exposed corner & he falls victim to a top-rope Kenton Bomb that probably should have been the end of the bout. But this is ‘Taker & he kicks out at 2. The cheap ending follows soon after as The Undertaker gets disqualified for using the US Title at the 21 minute mark. Both Kennedy & referee Charles Robinson get a tombstone piledriver in the aftermath. Overlong & familiar Undertaker bout that had quite a few moments of decent action, but didn’t really work as a whole. Apart from actually winning the bout, I can’t see this really elevating Kennedy to main-event status just yet. My rating may be a little harsh, but….. Match Rating…6.5
REY MYSTERIO defeated CHAVO GUERRERO in a ‘Falls Count Anywhere’ Match: We predictably get some nice pace, intensity & wrestling to open up the bout & it isn’t long until they are brawling up the entrance-way, against the set & into the crowd. Rey hits some nicely controlled aerial moves, while Chavo occasionally counters cleverly using chairs & guard-rails to his advantage. The 2 combatants practically do a slow half-lap around the arena before they stop at another entrance-way & Rey hits a flying cross body-block from a stairwell at the 12 minute mark for the pinfall. Enthusiastically performed & I can see what they were aiming for, but the strange structure of this match didn’t do it any favors. Following such a lengthy brawl through the crowd, the bout deserved more time & a better finish than the premature ending we got. You can see why the WWE love Rey so much in this bout, but his controlled recklessness (if that makes sense) didn’t really fit the nature of this feud & match. Match Rating…6.5
CHRIS BENOIT defeated WILLIAM REGAL: Nice job by the WWE here as following some earlier backstage segments, it seemed a certainty that Regal would face Vito. But it was Benoit who returned after 4 or 5 months & got the crowd to their feet. Predictably a technical match-up for the most part, JBL described this well as a “human chess match”. Once they finally get vertical, Benoit hits some amazingly loud chops, a loud headbutt that busts Regal open & a Swan-Dive Headbutt for a 2 count. Some decent back & forth action follows before Benoit chops away at Regal’s bleeding forehead with (pardon the pun) no mercy. A failed Regal Stretch attempt turns into a surfboard-like submission hold, but Benoit eventually escapes, hits a Full Nelson Suplex & locks in the Crossface for the victory at the 11 minute mark. I’m not usually a fan of out & out technical matches, but the ferocity that these 2 brought to this impromptu match-up was hard to dislike. Not always the most entertaining bout, but it sufficiently held interest & then did a little bit more. Match Rating…7.5
KING BOOKER defeated BATISTA, BOBBY LASHLEY & FINLAY in a Fatal Fourway Match to Retain the World HeavyWeight Title: A couple of handy backstage segments before the bout see King Booker having trouble with both Regal & Finlay, as well as Batista & Lashley having a friendly chat. Some nice byplay begins the match as Finlay initially allows the 2 faces to double-team the King, but then picks his spot & teams up with Booker to take out both Batista & Lashley. Of course, at the first hint of no face resistance, Finlay double-crosses the champ & tries to isolate him for the victory. Batista returns to break up a pinfall attempt though, only to have his arm targeted by the Irish veteran.
What follows is many minutes of one on one action beginning with Booker & Batista, then Finlay & Lashley (with a cameo from the Little Ba$tard) & finally Batista & Lashley. It doesn’t amount to much though, except Batista getting accidentally busted open pretty badly. Following a slight pause because of that, Lashley cleans house, but falls victim to a Bookend & a close near-fall. The 2 then wrestle for a little while, before Batista cleans house with 3 Spinebusters & a huge Batista Bomb on Finlay. But Lashley spears the Animal from out of nowhere taking both men out & allowing King Booker to crawl over & pin Finlay at the 17 minute mark. Perfectly acceptable & solid main-event that too heavily relied on one-on-one match-ups & rehearsed set pieces. For the most part, that was fine. But after a while, I found myself craving some 4 man action. Amazingly, if anything, it was Finlay who came out of this bout looking strong. Match Rating…7.5
PPV RATING (50.5/80) = 63
Looking at the key, I have basically given the 2006 version of 'No Mercy' a 'C+' grade & said that it was ‘worth a watch‘. I think that grade & comment is right on the mark, even though some may argue that it’s actually a little harsh due to the fact that it was weighed down by one bad match & a failing segment. Despite the fact that all but one bout was easily passable & actually quite good, I felt the event still did not capitalize on the 2 terrific opening lower-midcard bouts that exceeded most people’s expectations. Kennedy vs ‘Taker & Rey vs Chavo were a little disappointing for mine, while the main event was satisfactory, but not brilliant. Unfortunately, this pay-per-view will fade from memory fairly quickly, despite not being that bad at all.
Ok, that’s #197 in the books. This was a longer than usual column, so if you lasted the distance of reading the whole thing, I thank you for that & hope you enjoyed another 3 mini-columns in one. I’m certain that at least one of the 3 topics would have interested you, so if you want to provide feedback on Test, No Mercy or StarkMan’s booking of Kurt Angle in TNA, you may do so by emailing me DaveyBoy123@bigpond.com. But if you are an LOP Forums member, it would be much appreciated if you could leave feedback on my thread at http://www.lopforums.com/showthread.php?t=217&page=2
Next Wednesday in ‘The Wrestling Menu’, the streak continues. Actually, to be honest, I still haven’t fully decided what to write about next week, but don’t be too surprised if you see a DVD Review, as I am currently half way through watching one. As per usual, my column will be posted at the same Wednesday time on the same LOP channel. Until then, this is DaveyBoy signing off & asking you to remember that dinner is best served in 3 courses.
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