The Wrath of Tito - Lots of RVD criticisms, SummerSlam picks, and reader feedback
Submitted by Mr. Tito on Sunday, August 20, 2006 at 1:13 PM EST
Get these motherf*cking snakes off this motherf*cking computer so that I can write today's Wrath of Tito. Geesh! Welcome back to the column that's either your weekly routine or the temptation that you just can't resist... excuse the delay. Lots of grown up stuff to deal with this week...
-So I caught ECW on Sci-Fi the other day... wow, what a piss poor show that's become. For one, seeing the Big Show/Test/Mike Knox dominating is rough on the eyes to begin with... But the ONE GUY who could SAVE THE DAY just never comes through. When you think about ECW, you mostly think of one man. This guy, back in the day, captured the fans' imaginations and had their full support once he was a dominant Television champion. When ECW was restarted, it was thought that this guy would bring a lot to the table.
However, Rob Van Dam has absolutely sucked. Watching his match against Sabu on Tuesday seriously made me want to throw up. Rob Van Dam wrestled what was the equivalent of a bad backyard wrestling match. Sabu brought his game, as he was as crisp on hitting his moves as he has since his recent comeback (not counting the ladder side spot, which was hard to accomplish). Rob Van Dam looked sluggish, lazy, and disinterested in that ring. Facing Sabu in the main event should be what Rob Van Dam wants... Instead, he failed to, once again, seize the spotlight and has once again sucked in the ring.
Rob Van Dam is unwilling to step up his wrestling game and earn his prominent spot on the WWE rosters. This is in contrast with two other key ECW guys, such as the Sandman and Sabu. The Sandman is in tremendous shape. Say what you want about his storylines so far, the guy is in his best shape ever. He knew that reopening ECW was a great opportunity, thus, he got in incredible shape. With Sabu, he's changed his attitude and has become more cooperative backstage and in the ring. The results? Some of his best matches in a long time and he's getting rave reviews. What about Rob Van Dam? He's wrestling the same match, over and over again, and he continues to have the same piss poor selfish attitude. He seriously believes that he's the "whole F'N show", and therefore, he fails to apply himself to improve his status in the WWE. Van Dam is so lazy and so assured of his "ECW legacy" that he believes pushes should be given to him.
It's time for Rob Van Dam to GROW UP and become a professional wrestler. Up to now, he's been unprofessional. Promoters have been paying him top dollar just to see the same match, over and over again. RVD does the same kicks, flips, and spots, all the while showing zero in-ring psychology. You could work on his leg the entire match, for instance, and RVD will just instantly jump to the top rope without hesitation. Just horrible!
It's time to teach Rob Van Dam a lesson. If he wants to be a "main eventer", then teach him how to wrestle. That's right, I'm calling for a DEMOTION for Van Dam to wrestle at Ohio Valley Wrestling for one year. Within that year, he must be taught in-ring psychology. Mixing psychology in with his long list of flips, kicks, and spots, could sure up RVD as a wrestler. While he's down at OVW, get him on a strict drug rehab program. It's time for RVD to rid pot from his life. It's time to grow up. You can't smoke dope all of your life, especially when a corporation pays you a good 6 figures to produce in an athletic venue. It's time to change the look. Gone are the stupid airbrushed tights and in tights without the stupid look. Shave the damn ponytail. That haircut wasn't even that popular during the 1990's, so why continue it? Cut the damn hair or at least let the sides grow to match the rest!
I'm sure Rob Van Dam is a swell guy to be around. Fellow wrestlers probably like him and fans, at autograph signings, will probably say he's a nice guy. If I met him in person, I guarantee that I'd say the same thing. However, he's providing a service to we, the wrestling fans, and he's failed to provide that service with a few exceptions since his WWE arrival in 2001. It's time for him to step up and it's time for the WWE to realize that he needs some serious maitenance before he fully stops caring.
By the way, with ECW on Sci-Fi... nothing says that RVD/Sabu are not title worthy by having Kurt Angle taken out of the match. The WWE elites continue to rule that roster while hardly any new ECW talent is being introduced... Yep, it's being run by Vince McMahon.
The email address is wrathoftito@yahoo.com for all of you RVD lovers out there.
Speaking of mail...
PHAT MAIL
Busy week... still in catch-up mode for news... I'll answer email instead.
Dear Tito: What do you think about the rumors of Monty Brown leaving NWA-TNA and maybe joining the WWE?
For one, Monty Brown has YET to leave the TNA roster. And secondly, what makes you so sure that the WWE wants him or would take him?
I said it from day one about Monty Brown... TNA would misuse him when he was growing as a face and they did by turning him heel to side with Jeff Jarrett. Since then, I don't know if injuries have played a factor, but you don't hear of Brown since before that heel turn. With guys like Brown, AJ Styles, and Samoa Joe, those are guys you should build around as opposed to the constant parade of old WCW stars.
Would the WWE take him, if available? I think Vince would chance it. Vince is better off financially these days and he would enjoy the risk. Heck, he's tried to recreate Monty through Bobby Lashley, though Lashley has turned out to be a much different style of wrestler. According to stats, Monty is 6'2", which is roughly the size of the point where the WWE will take you seriously. I think it's worth the risk, although Vince will probably just job him out.
Dear Tito: In your next column, could you please explain why you hate Randy Orton so much and why do you think he can't wrestle?
First thing, I don't HATE Randy Orton. However, there are some things that he does that absolutely disgust me, especially given how he's been provided pushes that wrestlers fight their entire careers for.
With Orton, it's more based on ability. When he was first part of Evolution, I got to see him wrestle more on RAW. He didn't impress me. His moveset is weak, no psychology, and I get the feeling he feels bored when he's out there in the ring. What I sense about Orton is that he feels that it's his God-given-right to wrestle and be a main eventer, based on his dad's past career and involvement in Wrestlemania 1. Orton doesn't try. He's lazy and there haven't been too many matches since 2003 that have impressed me. His good matches have been from his opponent carrying his ass more than anything.
I think he's got some character issues, as well. Somehow, he's a good friend to HHH, and that has enabled him to further push his dad's legacy for undeserved pushes. Now, his issues with drugs and sexual harassment only prove what I have said about Orton all along. Orton feels that his big pushes should be handed to him based on who he is, and because of that, he feels bulletproof. He hasn't earned a damn thing to warrant being a World Champion because his wrestling ability still sucks, he's a horrible person, and he doesn't care enough to deserve being champion. The trouble caused by Orton is only due to his own actions. He should have held the title longer and for more times if he wasn't such a lazy ass (which opens him up to injury) or a primadonna.
Dear Tito: In a previous column, you suggested that Booker T should survive Summerslam against Batista and save the big rematch until Wrestlemania 23. Furthermore, you suggested that Batista should win the 2007 Royal Rumble. Why is that? Batista, in my opinion, hasn't been a draw since his comeback and he didn't justify his world title reign.
For one, I heavily disagree with you about "being a draw". He's wrestling on Smackdown, a show in which the WWE rates as #2 on their "care" chart openly. Smackdown drew modest when he was champion and sunk further below when he wasn't on the roster. Want proof? I took averages of Smackdown from when Batista joined the roster as champion and when he lost his title due to injury in early January 2006. When Batista was on that roster, the ratings were 2.83. Since then, Smackdown's ratings have been 2.54. Granted, Smackdown's ratings woes have continued since Batista has returned, but again, this is UPN and Smackdown. Nobody cares. Sure, Batista should make them care, but enough people cared about Batista to see him wrestle the Big Show on a recent edition of ECW on Sci-Fi!
I honestly believe that time will tell. I think if Smackdown builds up Booker T to be a huge arch nemesis for Batista, he'll draw. Batista lacked a rival back when he was champion before and that hurt his title reign, in my opinion. It's not like Edge who always has John Cena as a thorn in his side, and vice versa. I think that a Batista vs. Booker T program for Wrestlemania would be huge. That's my opinion, as I think Batista isn't done yet on proving that he truly can be a draw.
Dear Tito: Based on your recent comments on the teen violence/wrestling article, don't you think that professional sports contributes to that as well? Especially extremely violent ones such as boxing and ultimate fighting?
No. No chance in hell. With professional sports, it's perceived that they are REAL. Want proof of that? With baseball, hockey, basketball, and football, you can play those at the high school level, and in my opinion, participation in those sports creates more positives than negatives. Additionally, following those sports (ala fantasy football or just being a fan) has also created more positives than negatives. With boxing and real fighting, it's still perceived that they are real and you do see injuries up front.
Wrestling is different. While it's openly fake, the product, through its storylines, tries to tell you that it's not. The domestic violence, pushing of racial tensions, sexism, and other lewd behavior don't just happen by accident or random occurrences. They are placed in the storylines to get a reaction and the envelope is pushed purposely to strike those reactions, no matter how detrimental to society they may be. I think that the extremely violent backyard wrestling witnessed a few years ago proves that and the open following that Steve Austin had (heavy drinker, woman beater) was even worse. Based on the way that the wrestling business is pushed (through SHOCK value), it definitely creates higher violent feeling among ignorant teenagers than professional sports would.
Good question asked on LoPForums.com: What deceased wrestler would you bring back?
While I'd like all of those wrestlers back, one guy comes to mind. Owen Hart. In my opinion, he's the best wrestler to never hold a World Title. Period. I still think that he had yet to peak as a professional wrestler and that he probably would have been a foe for Triple H in 2000 had Owen not died in 1999. With Owen, he was a great character and I don't mean on-screen. Wrestlers respected him, Owen never did drugs, and he was a family man. Outside of Steve Austin, you'll never hear a single wrestler badmouth the guy. He was the first to have a show dedicated to him after his death and even the other promotion, WCW, had multiple tributes to the guy. That's respect!
Most of all, the World Title thing probably sticks the most. He should have been on his way to a World Title push. Instead, he was placed in the ridiculous Blue Blazer costume and told to fly down to the ring from the rafters. Most unfortunate.
QUICK SummerSlam Predictions!
Sabu vs. Big Show
Based on the way the Big Show has dominated ECW talent, I just can't find myself to believe that Vince McMahon would let anybody but Kurt Angle defeat him. With Sabu as champion, however, it would be interesting to see him as the main event every week and maybe getting a chance to wrestle crossover matches as well. However, I think the Big Show will win and feud more with Angle. Joy.
Tito's Pick: Big Show
Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero
My lack of Smackdown viewing has me puzzled on this, but I'll go with the face in Rey Mysterio for the win. WWE has a long track record of not caring about Chavo Guerrero.
Tito's Pick: Rey Mysterio
Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair
Wow... both wrestlers have expressed their desire to lose this match, WHICH IS GOOD. When it comes down to it, bitterness that dates 10 years ago, has come to pass and two professionals are willing to do business. I'll go with Foley, given Flair's desire to put wrestlers over in the past few years and based on the "shoot" promos, Flair tended to hold back more than Foley. I got the sense that Flair felt bad for maybe holding Mick back in 1994 (noting, however, that Cactus Jack wasn't a draw as much as Mankind would be years later when Vince tweaked the character) and about "glorified stuntman" comments. I also get the sense that Foley is serious about slowly becoming a full time wrestler again.
Tito's Pick: Mick Foley
Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton
Hogan's injury is the only thing giving Randy Orton a chance. However, based on last year's SummerSlam and how Hogan politicked to make Shawn Michaels look bad, I'll never pick against Hogan again in this type of big Pay Per View setting.
Tito's Pick: Hulk Hogan
Degeneration X vs. the McMahons
I've got a feeling that an injury angle might occur on Michaels to enable the McMahons to win, but at the same time, it might be an extended squash like Michaels vs. Vince from Wrestlemania 22. I'll go with the latter and it will probably be an entertaining humiliation of the McMahons.
Tito's Pick: DX
Booker T vs. Batista
Booker T deserves a longer reign and Batista should be built up better to take a bigger swing at Batista. I would still book Booker T to win and let Batista get his Wrestlemania rematch through the Royal Rumble. King Booker works and he should have the title longer to establish himself in the WWE, for a change.
Tito's Pick: Booker T
Edge vs. John Cena
I'm picking Edge for the reasons that John Cena is a better title chaser than champion and that Edge's last title reign was too brief. I also believe that Edge needs this win more than Cena at this point in their careers. In my opinion, both guys, however, need to put on a strong match to open fans' eyes to caring about their rivalry for future bouts.
Tito's Pick: Edge
I will be catching the show, but given my time lately, I'm unsure if I'll get a full blown review posted. Enjoy your week.
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