The Raw Report (07/31/06): HBK vs. Umaga
Submitted by Chad Matthews on Monday, July 31, 2006 at 11:12 PM EST





The Raw Report (07/31/06)

The show opened with Vince and Shane McMahon coming to the ring. Vince said that despite recent occurrences on Raw, the McMahons can’t stop smiling these days due to Stephanie having her baby...a baby that is more intelligent and rich than the entire audience put together. Vince continued, announcing that he and Shane would face off against DX at Summerslam in a tag team match that would be dedicated to the newest McMahon. Meanwhile, the beginning of the DX theme was played to disrupt them…it was only bits of the theme, though. Finally, DX made their presence felt at the top of the ramp. HBK congratulated the McMahons w/ the Jewish maseltoff…Trips pointed out that they were not Jewish, but then made another Jewish reference. HBK talked about their match at Summerslam, briefly, but then turned his attention back to the baby McMahon. He said that Triple H was there at the hospital last week and had acquired the entire McMahon family scrapbook/photo album. Trips took the mic and promised to show the very first photo of Vince, but that we’d have to be patient because they didn’t have color film back then. He introduced the photo on the Titantron…it wasn’t really Vince, but a baby body w/ Vince’s face on it. Trips said the photo was taken just before Vince started the “Vince McMahon Wipe My Ass” club. HBK then showed the first Shane McMahon photo…another fabricated concoction. Vince had enough, but Trips showed a picture of the newest member of the McMahon family w/ his (HHH’s) face on it and wearing DX clothes. HBK commented on how familiar the little girl looked. Shane called them both babies and said that at Summerslam…he fumbled with his words and said they’d change their diapers. Trips closed the segment with some advice for the new baby girl…Suck it…(CMV1 note- tell me…is this flawed logic or not: 5 young wrestlers can’t even score one fall on DX, but two non-wrestlers, one of which is older than 60, are supposed to be able to? Only in wrestling…Anyhow, decent opening segment. It’s a good thing Steph had that baby, as it’s given DX something to joke around about and keep themselves from getting too stale)

Backstage, Mike “The Tool” Mizanin showed footage of Jen saying she thinks JT should be eliminated from the Diva Search.


Match 1: Intercontinental Champion Johnny Nitro (w/ Melina) vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Carlito
-(CMV1 note- title was on the line…JR mentioned Trish and Carlito being a major item). As Nitro tried to make his patented entrance thru Melina’s legs, Carlito poked Shelton in the eye and hit Nitro with a baseball slide. As we went to a dreaded mid-match commercial break, Shelton came flying to the outside and onto Johnny and CCC w/ a leaping somersault plancha. Back from the break, SB had a chinlock on Nitro, while Carlito was laid out on the floor from a Shelton front kick. Carlito tried to get back in the ring, but Shelton knocked him back down to the floor. Benjamin then missed a dropkick on Nitro, but Nitro proceeded to miss a standing Shooting Star Press. Nitro went on to counter a Shelton powerbomb attempt into a sunset flip. He got a near fall, but Shelton quickly made a cover of his own, holding Johnny’s shoulders to the mat and folding him up like an accordion. Carlito broke it up with a sunset flip that took Shelton out of his cover and into a pinning predicament. 1…2…No! Nitro managed to break up the pin attempt! Eventually, Carlito tried a monkey flip on Shelton out of the corner, but Benjamin landed on his feet and ran over to try the same move on Nitro in the opposite corner. Nitro flipped 180 degrees onto his face, leaving Carlito and Shelton standing. Carlito clotheslined Shelton and hit a hurricanrana on Nitro. He tried to follow with a high impact move on Shelton, but Benjamin countered into a DDT. Shelton did not capitalize, though, thanks to Melina. The finish came when Carlito tried to take advantage of the argument going on b/t Shelton and Melina, but Nitro came back, knocked Shelton out of the ring, and rolled up Carlito for the win. Nitro retained at 7:43. (CMV1 rating- ** ½) (CMV1 note- good match, but too short. They had some really nice sequences, though…give these guys more time)

Diva contestant Layla made her choice for who she wanted gone…(CMV1 note- didn’t catch it)

Randy Orton came to the ring and declared that he was going to kill Hulk Hogan’s legend at Summerslam. Orton said after he does that, his career will take off…he’ll be in movies, he’ll write books, and star in his own reality to show. He then introduced the cast of what he liked to call, “Orton Knows Best.” Four people, all pretending to be members of the Hogan family, came to the ring to Hogan’s theme music. As the fake Hogans waved to the crowd, Orton thanked them all for being there. Randy asked the fake Nick what he wanted to be when he grew up. The fake Nick said he wanted to be a wrestler just like his Dad, which Orton responded to by telling him that he needed to lose some hair and get used to this (getting kicked in the nuts). Orton threw him out of the ring and turned his attention toward the others. He called the fake Brooke beautiful and kissed her hand. The fake Hulk didn’t like that and admonished young Orton with Hogan-esque banter. Orton said that in three weeks, he planned on killing the Hogan legend and that there’s nothing anyone can do about it. He then made out with fake Brooke and hit the RKO on fake Hulk. (CMV1 note- decent segment, but this feud fails so mightily in comparison to the fantastic feud that Hogan had with HBK last year. It would’ve been a good segment had the WWE actually done a mock episode of “Hogan Knows Best” starring Orton). Before he walked away, Orton sucker punched Jerry Lawler, setting up a match between the two for Raw in Memphis next week.

Backstage, Armando Alejandro Estrada thanked the McMahons for giving Umaga a match against HBK and congratulated them on their new family member. AAE gave them a bunch of Cuban cigars.

Tomorrow night on ECW, the least extreme of any of Big Show’s many WWE challengers to his ECW world title will make his debut on Sci-Fi...in the form of Batista!!! (CMV1 note- there are ECW superstars, you know)

Diva Search contestant Erica wants Rebecca gone…

Match 2: Trish and Candice vs. Women’s Champ Mickie James and Victoria
-(CMV1 note- Torrie was special guest referee…anyone else think she is extremely annoying? Damn, Candice was such a natural heel…why they turned her is beyond me). Candice and Victoria started off against each other. Candice took early control with a full-nelson into a fireman’s carry before pinpointing her arm with a leg a drop and knee smash. Vic gained momentum and tagged Mickie, who connected on a double axe handle from the top rope. Fast forward to later in the match, when Trish scored a near fall when she countered a Mickie hurricanrana attempt into a sit-out powerbomb pin. The finish came when Trish hit an awkward looking Stratusfaction for win. Trish and Candice got the victory at 4:15. (CMV1 rating- ). (CMV1 note-)

Backstage, Nitro, Melina, and Mick Foley had some basic chit chat going. Foley asked Melina to introduce him when he made his first live Raw appearance sine a few weeks ago. She agreed, Nitro was cool with it, and it was on…

In the ring, Melina introduced Foley, who decided that he was going to give the fans what they wanted: Flair and Foley in the ring. However, he joked that they were going to be tag team partners and go after the tag belts. All kidding aside, Foley said that he and Flair had a few things in common despite all their differences, citing that they both took young superstars under their wing (Orton w/ Flair, Melina w/ Foley) and they both have famous friends (the President for Flair, a porn star for Foley). Foley ran down a few things from his list of non-wrestling accomplishments, while bad mouthing Flair for his road rage incident earlier in the year. Flair then came to the ring and told Foley to shut his mouth. After taking off his jacket, Flair said he’d been waiting for three weeks, a long time in his life, to get Foley in the ring, face-to-face. Flair questioned Foley’s persona and took a Flair flop in response to the notion of the Cactus Jack character. The Nature Boy got heated (and cheap), comparing Foley to A-Rod. He continued by comparing their books, which Flair said he wrote after drinking a lot of wine. Flair then spoke of imaginary badasses like someone was talking about that, and mentioned some real bad asses, including Harley Race and Dusty Rhodes. He said he wanted to taste Foley’s blood in a hardcore match (essentially). He asked the crowd if they wanted to see “Flairy” and Foley in a hardcore environment. Flair hinted that he wanted to take all the major bumps that Foley has taken and finalize their issues in the ring. He got personal after that, talking about how much nonsense it was for Foley to talk about his family, but then changed subjects out of nowhere to Melina and how he could go all night with her 15 years ago. Foley then talked about Flair’s view toward women and how his differed from it. He then bashed Flair for losing three wives and being a bad father to four kids. Flair made a move towards striking him, so Foley backed up. Foley tried to calm him down by bringing up the flight that the two shared a few months back and how it touched him that Flair would call his kids after getting off the flight just to say hello. He said he’d never know how it felt to have to tell your kids, “Daddy, I’m in jail.” Flair decked Mick at that point, but Jonathon Coachman came out and made a match b/t the two for Summerslam, courtesy of Vince McMahon. Foley denied the match and reminded everyone that his contract allows him to wrestle when and if he wants. Since Foley thinks he’s only got a few good ones left in him, he doesn’t feel the need to waste his time on Ric Flair. Have a nice day…(CMV1 note- a rather disconcerted promo from my point of view. I thought Flair was downright nonsensical for the most part, as he was all over the place w/ his promo. Foley was better, but not quite as on as he’s been in recent weeks/months. Frankly, it seemed Foley was trying to make the most out of all the craziness that Flair was spewing…still an interesting storyline that’s building nicely to their eventual match, though)

JR and King announced Cena vs. Edge for the WWE title at Summerslam…


Match 3: Matt Striker vs. John Cena
-(CMV1 note- Striker cut a pre-match promo, running down Cena). Before the match, WWE Champion Edge (w/ Lita) came to ramp before walking over to their Rated R announce table up where the WCW-style one used to be. Striker tried to capitalize, but Cena clotheslined him and gave him a belly-to-belly suplex. Cena then used the seldom-seen Throwback before catching Striker with the Prototype spinning back drop. Johnny hit the 5-Knuckle Shuffle, followed by the FU. The finish came when Cena defeated Striker via submission w/ the STFU at 1:08. (CMV1 rating- no rating) (CMV1 note- not much furthering of the Edge-Cena feud tonight, huh?).


Match 4: Johnny (w/ the Spirit Squad) vs. Rory McAllister (w/ Robbie)
-(CMV1 note- the Squad did a pre-match cheer). Rory with a headlock to start, which he followed with a headbutt. The Squad then got involved and tripped up the Highlander. The boys w/ spirit had some fun passing around the megaphone, but it backfired when the ref tossed four of them from the ringside area, leaving Johnny to fend for himself. Meanwhile, Rory recovered and hit a back elbow smash. His offense was short-lived, though, as Johnny tripped him up and sent him face-first into the bottom turnbuckle. Johnny then hit a nice neckbreaker over his knee and scored with a jumping knee drop. Rory fought back with a running sledgehammer and a backdrop. He then hit a nice Rock Bottom into a backbreaker. He tried to follow with an atomic drop, but Johnny flipped over, landed on his feet, and hit his spinning front wheel kick finisher. The finish came when Johnny failed to make the cover, allowing Rory to recover again and roll him up for the win. Rory defeated Johnny at 4:21. (CMV1 rating- *) (CMV1 note- solid action)

JT made her selection for who should get ousted from the Diva Search…

The Diva Search contestants came out to ramp. The crowd was dead for this…Rebecca got canned…

JR and King introduced footage of the Wrestlemania 23 fan rally in Detroit.

Backstage, the police came into the DX locker room and found those Cuban cigars that AAE gave Vince in Triple H’s bag. They said those were contraband and proceeded to escort Trips out of the building. On his way out, Trips bumped into the McMahons and told them if they wanted to play, then they (DX) would play…


Match 5: HBK vs. Umaga (w/ Armando Alejandro Estrada)
-HBK connected quickly with knife-edge chops and a boot to the face. He then reversed an Umaga attempt at Snake Eyes in the corner and pushed Umaga into the turnbuckle. HBK stayed hot, reversing an Umaga powerbomb attempt into a sunset flip. He couldn’t bring him all the way over, so Umaga jumped up and tried for a rear (butt) drop. Umaga missed his attempt, as HBK moved out of the way. Michaels then baseball slid between Umaga’s legs, sending himself to the outside. As Umaga looked on in anger, the McMahons showed up at the ramp. We then got a dreaded mid-match commercial break, but I guess that was to be expected. HBK was fighting back w/ punches and chops. Umaga maintained control, though, with a clothesline and a running head drop. He then kicked HBK in the face, sending him out of the ring. On the outside, Umaga smashed HBK’s face into the announce table. Eventually, Umaga threw HBK over the top rope and back into the ring, where he leveled Michaels with a running knee lift. The Samoan Bulldozer proceeded to stomp away at HBK before locking him in a neck vice. Michaels fought back to his feet and punched Umaga in the gut. Umaga came right back with a headbutt and a body slam, followed by another running head drop. HBK backed up into the corner, putting himself in perfect position for Umaga’s running hip smash in the corner. Umaga went for it, but HBK moved out of the way and then came roaring back. Michaels hit the flying forearm and went for the nip up, but AAE got involved. As HBK argued with Estrada, Umaga came running at him. Again, though, Michaels moved out of the way, sending Umaga right into Armando. HBK was unable to get any offense going, though, as he was quickly tossed into the air and caught on the way down with a Samoan Drop. Umaga became enraged at that point and went to the outside. He threw all kinds of foreign objects all over the place. Vince convinced Umaga to get back in the ring and finish him off. Umaga did just that and went for the Samoan Spike, but HBK ducked and hit a low blow while the ref was distracted by McMahon. HBK hit the top rope elbow drop and went for Sweet Chin Music, but Vince grabbed his foot and prevented it. Michaels decked Vince and then fended off Shane when he got in the ring. The finish came when Umaga drilled HBK with a running Samoan Spike. Umaga defeated Michaels at 11:42. (CMV1 rating- * ¾). After the match, Shane and Vince double-teamed HBK and eventually laid him out with a Shane superkick into a chair that Vince was holding, further into HBK’s face. Vince taunted HBK as the show faded to black, alerting him to the fact that next week, Trips would face Umaga. (CMV1 note- Well, this was Umaga’s first test in the ring, as he went over 10-minutes with one of the best in the business. Argue that it was the way the match was booked, but I wasn’t impressed. This was his chance to shine and he ended up being unimaginative. I wonder if the WWE officials thought similarly...The show closing beatdown on HBK was much needed to give the heels an advantage and give us a reason to want to see DX vs. McMahons)



All in all…it was another average Monday night from where I sit. I thought it was nice to see the McMahons gain an advantage on DX and I enjoyed the triple threat IC title match, but outside of that I was fairly unimpressed. The segments hyping the Orton-Hogan and Foley-Flair feuds were decent, but not up to snuff…everything else surrounded around that horrible Diva nonsense and filler material…Thus, I’m giving this a 5/10, a generous rating, and calling it a night. I’m surprised I haven’t gotten any “you’re too negative emails, yet”…





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