I Got To Tell You Something #47: Too Much Love (Main Page Column Debut)
Submitted by Big Brother on Wednesday, July 19, 2006 at 5:58 PM EST
I Got To Tell You Something 47: Too Much Love
Hi there little brothers and sisters. How are you doing today? I hope you are good because I, for one, am in a great mood. Why shouldn’t I be with this column being the official debut of my Main Page tenure. I hope to make a good impression to all of you and that my column will be part of your weekly wrestling pleasure.
I think I should talk a bit about myself and what to expect from me. Well, I’ll simply outline what to expect from me. I’ll talk more about myself in upcoming editions. For now, suffice to say that my columns don’t have a set format as they are changing from time to time. I also have a tendency to try new stuff every once in a while and I think that the readers of the CF enjoyed my creativity. You’ll have the time to see it in due time.
Yes, I was a writer from the Columns Forums. If you haven’t checked them out, you should as there are numerous extremely talented columnists over there. I’ll try to plug some of them in upcoming columns. For now, let’s say that the “CFer” of the week has to be Degenerate who just posted his Column Of The Month which was posted on the same date as his first year anniversary as a writer for this website. Pretty cool if you ask me and his column is just great.
Anyway, more on that in the upcoming weeks. For now, it’s time to talk about some wrestling. I am trying a different approach to a subject. In this column, I will try to show wrestling thought the eyes of various wrestlers. Hope you recognize each of them…
“Too Much Love Will Kill You” – Queen.
I'm just the pieces of the man I used to be
Too many bitter tears are raining down on me
I'm far away from home
And I've been facing this alone
For much too long
I started in this business four decades ago. For now 40 years I’ve been in the ring. During these years, I made some bad decisions. Not for my career, as I’ve been a staple of this industry for all this time. Even at my age, fans still mark out every time I strut down to the ring. Whenever my music is played, I’ll hear hundreds of them answer with my classic “Wooooo!”.
No, the bad decisions were regarding my own personal life, about my family. I took upon me to let them down, to leave them on their own to pursue my dream. I preferred the company I worked for, the co-workers who, just like me, wanted to make it big, the long traveling and the warm touch of sexual workers and drugs to the presence of my own family.
There are days when I tell myself that this is over, that I can’t continue like that, that my body gave enough but every single time, I get back in the ring and just can’t resist the high that 20 000 screaming fans can give to me.
I might be old, but I can’t leave wrestling. Those fans and their love are the only things that make me still feel young.
I feel like no-one ever told the truth to me
About growing up and what a struggle it would be
In my tangled state of mind
I've been looking back to find
Where I went wrong
I remember my first match in the WWE. It was against Kurt Angle. I did everything I could to show Vince that I could be a Main event player one day. I had sort of a mini-push to begin my career but, it really was a simple Halloween skit that got me over with the fans. Funny how a little rap can make you over as a wrestler.
Since then, I tried to improve as a wrestler and as a performer. I wanted to thank the fans because without their support, I wouldn’t be a two-time World Heavyweight Champion. Everything looked fine for a long time. My merchandises were selling, my matches were getting better and the crowd loved me. But then all of a sudden, things changed.
I was supposed to face the biggest heel in the industry but the fans started to turn their back on me. Oh, on camera, I made it look like I could handle it all but it’s been really hard and depressing. I don’t know what I did to earn all those boos. I was showing intensity, giving good promos and working with the best of the best to give them a great match but they still booed me.
What the hell happened? How could their opinion of me change so fast? How can I make them love me again?
Too much love will kill you
If you can't make up your mind
Torn between the lover
And the love you leave behind
You're headed for disaster
'cos you never read the signs
Too much love will kill you
Every time
There isn’t anything I didn’t do for those fans. There isn’t a single part of my body that didn’t suffer for their enjoyment. I was cut by barbed wire, fell on thumbtacks, jumped from the hell in a cell onto the announce table and nearly killed myself all around the world. I lost an ear in Germany, was in a C4 match in Japan and bleed profusely all around the United States.
But I had to quit. I understood at one point that my body couldn’t follow that path anymore. I also understood that my family needed me and that it was hurting them to see me get hurt. I decided that my family was the most important thing in my life.
But I just couldn’t. There simply isn’t any thrill like coming down to the ring as fans are standing on their feet, trying to get a picture of me. The feeling when I perform a dangerous move and pull it off successfully is unique in the world. It’s not that I love the pain, it’s that I love to hear the fans gasp in unison, amazed that I could fall into a pile of thumbtacks or being speared through a flaming table.
I tried to quit because I love my family. I had to come back because I love the fans. I don’t think I could live without either of them.
I'm just the shadow of the man I used to be
And it seems like there's no way out of this for me
I used to bring you sunshine
Now all I ever do is bring you down
I was called “The best there is. The best there was. The best there ever will be.” That was a long time ago. In those days, I was a big part of the company. I gave the fans some of the most memorable moments of the 1990s. My feud with my brother Owen, with the British Bulldog, the Iron Man Match with Shawn Micheals, the Wrestlemania 13 match with Stone Cold…
But since then, a lot changed. I was screwed by Vince and my brother died. I became biter and I said some things that I regret today. Then I was injured by Goldberg and, just life that, my career was over. My stroke, 3 years later, gave me a different look to life itself.
I’m nearly 50 years old now and I am in no shape to perform anymore. I know some fans disliked what I became, stating that I complained too much. I know that others disliked the fact that I refused to appear on Raw, even after being introduced into the WWE Hall of Fame. Some of them ever hold a grudge against me because I can’t wrestle anymore. Clearly, some of the older fans that loved me stopped. The newer fans don’t understand why I was so good or important to the WWE.
I can’t believe that I went from being loved and even adulated to being a mere afterthought. After all these incredible memories. After I gave my life to wrestling. I wish I could change their opinion of me again…
How would it be if you were standing in my shoes
Can't you see that it's impossible to choose
No there's no making sense of it
Every way I go I'm bound to lose
I have so many memories tied to wrestling. My ladder match at Wrestlemania X, my first title victory, my hell in a cell match with the Undertaker… But there are these other memories. The ones that, today, I can’t be proud of. The ones that, as a born again Christian, I am ashamed to admit I was a part of. The night I screwed Bret Hart with Vince, the fake injury not to lose the title cleanly… and the bad example DX was for a generation of young fans.
At that time, I thought all of it was funny. Now myself a father, I know that I don’t want my son to act like that. Ever. But on the other hand, I know how much it means to the fans to have me back to a more edgy persona. I saw their reaction when I gave the crotch chop salute before leaping from that 20 foot ladder last Wrestlemania. I know they want me back to what I was doing many years ago but I just can’t do it all over again. I have a troubled conscience already and I don’t want to do any more things that I’ll regret in the future.
And here lies my problem. I love my fans and I want to make them happy but I love Jesus, my wife and my kids too. I had to take a decision and I decided that, to help the company, to help Hunter get over as a babyface, I would let them bring back DX and I would be part of it. I can’t believe I am doing it against my own beliefs.
Is there way to have me as a part of DX without going against my religious self? This is a line so hard to find and so easy to cross… but I’m willing to give it a go if it can make the fans happy.
Too much love will kill you
Just as sure as none at all
It'll drain the power that's in you
Make you plead and scream and crawl
And the pain will make you crazy
You're the victim of your crime
Too much love will kill you
Every time
All of these men gave it all to wrestling. Not only them but also so many others that just can’t all be listed in a single column. They entertained us on a weekly basis and take risks to get injured, even killed, for my own little pleasure. They do that because they love us, but also because they need to be loved in return.
Love is a strong word. Love has some strong consequences too. It can make you do the craziest thing for the loved one. If you ever fell in love, you know what I’m talking about. You would do anything for the person you love. I, for one, would give my life for my son if needed. But there is always the other side of the medal; the pain it can cause when love goes wrong. Again, if you’ve ever been in love, you know what I’m talking about.
Have you ever wanted so bad to be loved by someone that you risked your life? Or made you act in a way that you feel ashamed to admit? The need to be loved by one person is one thing but those wrestlers feel the need to be loved by millions and millions of fans. Sometime it can go too far and they pay the price.
A good example that I haven’t really touched in this column is when wrestlers take risks with their well being by taking drugs to enhance their physic. They do it because they think it will get them to be more appreciated and loved by the fans. Or, in the wrestling jargon "be over”. But we all remember way too many wrestlers who died before their time because of those drug abuses.
Rick Rude, Davey Boy Smith, Road Warrior Hawk, Crash, Brian Pillman, Eddie Guerrero and just too many to list them all. Not all of them died directly from overdose. Eddie, for instance, just abused them too much in his life. And at one point, years after he stopped taking drugs, his heart failed. But don’t make the mistake to think that these two events were unrelated… they weren’t.
It seems like wrestlers nearly all die young. Way too young. In rare cases it’s from an incident in the ring, sometimes because of the drugs they took and other times it’s just that their body suffered enough. But even with all those deaths and injuries, the wrestling industry continues to grow strong. The wrestlers continue to give everything they can to make it big. Why? Because they love their sport. Because they love their fans. Because the rush of having a whole arena scream your name is just too damn inviting.
Love is a strong word that may make you do crazy things. It can make you take risks or got to lengths that you shouldn’t not or even don’t want to. All these performers loved wrestling. Some of them loved it too much. For some of them, it was their downfall.
Too much love will kill you
It'll make your life a lie
Yes, too much love will kill you
And you won't understand why
You'd give your life, you'd sell your soul
But here it comes again
Too much love will kill you
In the end...
In the end.
You can leave feedback at bigbrother_lop@hotmail.com
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