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Submitted by Wevv Mang on Monday, March 20, 2006 at 12:32 AM EST
Ridin’ With The Bossman – The Week In Wrestling Reviewed Greetings! Welcome to another edition of Ridin' With The Bossman, the column that demands Vince be drug tested. It’s been a huge week of wrestling. The sheer volume of wrestling has been staggering. Two TNA shows, three WWE shows. 10 hours of nationally broadcast wrestling, with some change left over. That’s like stepping back in time to 2000, and the good old days of WCW and WWF. Only WCW got better ratings. Not that TNA doesn’t have talent, they just have a love of Russo Swerves of Doom, and Jeff Jarrett. So, there’s a lot to cover, and that’s what will fill this column. I may be able to fit in a Not Kane’s House, as Wrestlemania is getting close, and you know WWE will step up their efforts to get Brett Hart to appear at WM itself, not just the Hall Of Fame. Which sold out as well. No big surprise there. Think about it. I figure that at least half the tickets sold for WM are going to some one who doesn’t live in Chicago, and that’s being generous. The Rosemont, I mean Allstate Arena, is a small place. Maybe 30,000 tops. 15,000 out of town visitors is a small number to guesstimate for WM. Yet Wrestlemania is in TWO WEEKS! There wasn’t much news this week, but what we got was pretty big. Let’s take a look and see how it affected the two biggest companies in the US today. Destination X Recap info credited to Mike Johnson Dave Sahadi, you still got it. The video package to set up the PPV was a really cool, if artsy take off of early cinema. Opera, grainy effects, and yes, it was Jeff Jarrett. No wait, according to the recap, it wasn’t Jarrett, but Eric Young. Still, I really liked it. Great, innovative stuff man. Alex Shelley defeated Jay Lethal Lance Hoyt defeated Matt Bentley, with a bullshit finish. Team Canada (Eric Young and Bobby Roode) defeated The Naturals James Gang (Road Dogg, Billy Gunn, and Bullett Bob Armstrong, I kid you not) defeated LAX (Konan, Homicide, and Machete (which is the correct spelling, I always thought it was with two T’s, but it’s not)) International X – Chris Sabin defeated Sonjay Dutt, Petey Williams, and Puma Jeff Jarrett, Abyss, and America’s Most Wanted defeated Team 3-D, Rhyno, and Ron Killings X-Division Championship - Christopher Daniels defeated Samoa Joe and A.J. Styles NWA Championship – Christian defeated Monty Brown It was a long PPV. I miss the first 15 minutes of the first airing, and waited for the West Coast Replay. So, it didn’t start until 9 pm. It went to nearly midnight. Practically three solid hours of wrestling. The first hour was excellent. The International X match was the match of the night. Those guys put on a hell of a show. Awesome match. Lots of spots, but they took the time to sell them, and man, it was great. The second hour started to drag down. Bullet Bob Armstrong looked like a grandpa, and there’s no way that dude should have been in the ring. Flair looks young next to that guy. And Bob doesn’t have near the ability left that Flair does. The third was strong, with a weak ending. The finish to the Matt Bentley- Lance Hoyt match was total bullshit. Now, when I saw Lance Hoyt, WWE instincts kicked in, and I though Matt was going to lose, because Lance is a big, tall, blonde dude. But this is TNA, so that shouldn’t mean anything, right? Bentley has got the hot chick and the Bentley Bounce. But no. And it’s due to Jarrett hijinks. Alex Shelley and Eric Young were sent looking for Sting by Jeff Jarrett (Counter moves to 1). So, the match isn’t over yet, and it’s still anyone’s game. They drop flyers on the crowd. Traci picks one up, and is so enthralled, that she calls over Matt to look at it. Bentley gets distracted, and loses. What is on the flyer? Nude pictures of Gail Kim? No, a Sting warning. Bull-Shit. That’s worse than WWE. BUBBA SPEAKS! And it’s a damn good promo with a weak tag line. Still, it was short and easy to forget, while the gist of the promo still carries it. Jarrett Speaks! And it’s not good. Mitchell saved it. The Jarrett vs The World match Well, there was a really weird spot. AMW had one of the naturals I believe in the corner. They were all hunched over, and then AMW went flying for no reason. Then Jarrett grabbed the guy and got the pin. It just seemed like they had to remind the guy that Jarrett was supposed to get the pin, and it was time to wrap it up. Just through the match off. Samoa Joe Speaks! Joe brings up Goldberg and does his catchphrase one better. “Who’s left?” Man, that guy has talent. He’s got charisma, and skill. And now that he doesn’t have the X title, he can go after the NWA one. And take out Jarrett’s army on the way. Honestly, all through the PPV it was ridiculous. Christian Speaks Your champion gets only a few minutes to speak at a time, and he’s been hurt somehow, but he still gives it a hundred percent and it’s good. Christian Wins? The ending to the main event was a total cluster. And not in a good way. Just horrible. Everyone and their mother ran out there for. We had, Jarrett, a chunk of his “army”, Sting, and Scott Steiner. In short, Christian, Rhyno and Sting got beat up, and the end was Big Poppa Pump standing with Jarrett. You know, I want to like TNA. I really do. But Jarrett ruins it for me. In recent news, TNA lost their Thursday night prime time slot to UFC. Rumors also suggest that ratings didn’t play a factor, but that’s bull. TNA ratings have been stagnant and on the lower side. They used to get 1’s, but now they’re getting .7’s. What changed? Jarrett all over TV. Again. Look at it this way. Jarrett has about 16, yes 16, people trying to get him over. Let’s count them. A1, Scott D’amore, Petey Williams, Bobby Roode, Eric Young, Alex Shelley, Monty Brown, Austin Ares, Gail Kim, Jackie Gayda, James Storm, Johnny Devine, Chris Harris, Roderick Strong, and now he has Scott Steiner, Abyss, and James Mitchell. Mitchell at least keeps the focus on the Monster Abyss, but he’s standing right next to Jarrett. When you can see him. Now, Impact is only an hour long, and three popular stables (Team Canada, AMW, and Generation Next) and two out of the three hot chicks, are all with Jarrett. If there wasn’t backstage pressure for Jarrett to stay away from the X-Division, Samoa Joe would be Jeffy’s lackey as well, and now that he’s lost the title, well, he better start rehearsing his “Jeff Jarrett is the Greatest!” speech, without cracking up. Oh, and the entire listed roster on the TNA website comes to 49 people. That’s including Kevin Nash and Jeff Hardy, as well as managers and chicks. Still the first hour and a good chunk of the other two hours were entertaining. The International X match tips the balance to “Worth The Money Spent”. Raw Recap info courtesy of Carl Walsh Quick results and then opinions. Trish beat Vicki Edge beat Goldust Spirit Squad beat HBK in a Steel Cage match Shelton beat RVD to keep the IC title. Cena, Kane, and Big Show defeated H, Masters, and Carlito. Is that it for matches? Yes, it is. And Edge vs Goldust was over quick. Yes, Raw was about skits, lots of them. We started off the show with a drug test for HBK, which ended with “piss” thrown on Vince and Shane. Cowboy Troy For those of you who don’t know who Cowboy Troy is, I looked up a few facts. Cowboy Troy is the man who claims to have invented Hick Hop, the blending of rap and country music. Troy has had some individual success, but I believe it’s safer to say that most of his notoriety comes from working alongside Big and Rich, the multi-platinum selling bands, as well as Gretchen Wilson, Toby Keith and Trace Adkins. In other words, Cowboy Troy is a name in the Nashville scene, mainly due to his success with others. Still, he is one of the hottest producers. So, he appeared on the show, sitting at the announce booth. He was lucky to be able to plug his show. He came out, sat down, said a couple of sentences, and that was it. An actual celebrity appearance, squandered. So much for working with USA. Thanks for coming, get the F out. Crazy Lesbo Stalker Mickie I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy this angle. It’s pretty good. Of course, it could all go downhill very quickly. For the moment, I like it. Trish is absolutely fabulous, and Mickie has something about her. She’s good. And frankly, all the chicks have looked good. All it needs is another shower scene, and this time, let’s have it be Lillian. Edge and Foley Edge has been top notch. His skits are funny. Foley came out hot, and brought the hardcore. Nice. Cena and H, Contract Signing CHAOS!!!!!11!!! Yes, it was a contract signing and that means excitement! Not really, as I just don’t think any contract signing is exciting. H pisses on Cena, so nothing new, but I do have a thought. The Road To Wrestlemania is a big time for WWE. The mania hype draws in viewers, and not just for one guy. It’s the event, not a person. So saying, I don’t see a problem pushing H. Aside from personal preferences that is. It’s after Mania, when all the hype has done it’s job and folks are paying closer attention to the shows, both Smackdown and Raw, that the problem may arise. Let’s say H wins the belt after Mania, when the interest starts to die off. All the old fans that come back see H with the belt. Again. So, H needs a hot feud. H vs Edge is the one I would go with. Now that H is being pushed to the moon, look at the ratings. Stable. Which isn’t bad normally, but with the hype machine on full throttle, they should be going up, not staying the same. H is not a draw. A main eventer, yes, but not a draw. In fact, a case could be made that he tanks ratings. But Edge is a draw. Highest rated show in years for those two, three weeks he was champion. He revived Cena, while H is sucking the life out of him. So, if pushing H now means that H will be jobbing later, then no problems. Smackdown Recap Info courtesy of Chad Matthews Quick match results: Finlay defeated Lashley Burchill and Krystal defeated Regal and Jillian Booker T defeated Jobber Matt Hardy defeated Animal Benoit defeated OJ Kurt Angle, Rey Mysterio, and Randy Orton defeated MNM and Mark Henry Six matches compared to five. Two were short. Still, more wrestling per hour than Raw. Smackdown also had better skits. Booker and Boogey Man is gold. Booker and Sharmell crack me up. MNM Likes to Spank It MNM are leering over Candice’s Playboy, when Melina enters and gushes over Vince on the cover of ROIDS magazine. Yeah, Wrestling Court can be a bitch. Angle, Rey, Orton Interview Great job. Best interview I’ve seen in a while. It was Angle and Orton for the most part, with Orton getting the bulk of the lines. Rey chimed in here and there. But great work, and when Randy has a script, he can be solid. It’s when he has to improvise in the ring that he falls apart. Road Warrior Animal. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You have GOT to be kidding me. Mark Henry Speaks Good job by Mark. I was afraid that WWE had forgotten about him, after he came in big and then jobbed all over the place, but nope, he’s still got some life left in him. Good job on the mic. Was it stellar? No, but it was solid. It also made me think. Mark has been in the WWE for ten years. Straight. He’s done a lot of jobs, and most of his runs in the middle were a month or two. But he’s been going strong for a while now, and his work has gotten a lot better. He’s no Benoit, but he’s better than most of the goofs they drag up from OVW. Now Mark’s contract expires this year, probably very soon. The question is, do they resign Mark Henry, while he’s gotten momentum on his side? Because you know, if they do the old fire him, wait a year or two and then resign him, there’s a good chance that he won’t be spending that time improving. Now that WWE is bringing back Test (How? After what he said and the way he was fired? It must be to silence a lawsuit, that’s the only reason to bring Test back), Chuck Palumbo, who I always liked, and Henry Freakin Godwin. Who’s Henry Godwin? Some big goof. He’s not Mideon. Another Johnny Ace screw up? He did sign the wrong one-legged guy before he signed Zach Gowan. Lightening does strike twice sometimes. And this is Johnny Ace we’re talking about. Finlay So, you got a guy who has been praised for in ring technical skills, fans seem to like him, and he has plenty of experience working with rookies. So, what do you do? Make him wrestle? No, you give him a stick and that’s how he wins. Overall, I thought Smackdown was a really good show. That interview segment really boosted the show in my mind. Saturday Night Main Event Recap courtesy of Tito….Tito? Oh wait, it was grabbed from the Torch, but Tito put it up. Still, gave me a pause. Thanks for putting it up Mr. Tito. OK, here’s the deal. The audio for the show went out ten minutes in. It could be heard on the NBC affiliate, Channel 12, but over the cable system you got silence. Cox, you bastards. So, I got SMNE on tape. With no sound. You want a trip? Watch the show on mute. Just goofy. So, I watched the first twenty minutes in dead silence. There’s JR! He’s back on TV! What’s he saying? No idea. I saw the Booker T skit in silence, and it was still great. I could follow what was going on, and was laughing as well. That’s talent. So, a crawl started up on NBC letting people know that the audio was out, and when I called Cox, they knew what I was calling for, and it seemed like they got a lot of calls. Damn drunken techs. Here’s the quick results. Cena and H beat Angle, Rey, and Orton Bradshaw and Austin beer Drinking Contest went to a….No Contest. Trish and Mickie defeated Candace and Victoria Shane O’Mac defeated HBK -Incredible match. Shane, you are one crazy son of a gun. So, for a two-hour show, you had three matches, and one beer-drinking contest. And skits. Lots and lots of skits. Boogey and Booker This is pure gold. Booker is the right guy for this. He’s hamming it up and making it fun. Which is a good thing. Booker is a great character, and Boogey is well, a worm eating weirdo. Seriously, the guy shows down on worm. Week after week. And that’s just on TV. It can’t be good for you to eat that many live worms. It just can’t. Edge and Foley Serious brutality, and kudos to the guy with the fire extinguisher. He was right on it. Thumbtacks, stiff shots, and chairs. Nice. Vince and HBK Way too much stuff about this, and it doesn’t make a lick of sense. JBL and Austin Great bit. Hilarious and some great mic work from both men. They work really well together, though I think Bradshaw needs to show more courage. Undertaker and Mark Henry Not bad, not bad at all. Taker beat up Daviari on the casket. Mark didn’t run away, Taker took him out. Which is a world of difference. Shane O’Mac That guy still has his moves. The ending was just an excuse to relive 1997. In other words, egg Brett hart on. Still a solid match. A couple of things to talk about from this show. Let’s Be Friends NBC! WWE went all out to suck up to NBC. They hyped upcoming shows like there was no tomorrow, giving them lots of TV time. “Screw USA, we wanna be on NBC!” seemed to be the mentality. Funny thought, when the audio went out. Lorne Michaels: So, Wrestling is going to be on NBC? On Saturday? They better not fuck up the beginning of my show like they did with that retarded football abortion! NBC Guy: No problem Lorne, we’ll put them on in prime time. Lorne: OK. That’s fine. (A ringing is heard) Hold on a second. Hey, it’s Vince McMahon! I wonder what he wants? On Lorne’s Phone: No hard feelings? Love Vince. A naked picture of Vince then appears. Lorne: What the? That son of a bitch! Lorne dials a number. Lorne: Hey Tony! It’s Lorne. Do me a favor, and kill the audio? Thanks Tony. That will show that son of a bitch who he’s dealing with. Good luck Vince! But since it was only Phoenix that leaves only one person. Albert aka A-Train. He lives out here. That or a fan of Eddie Guerrero was getting revenge. They lost their house Vince! Way to take care of them. You pissed on Eddie for months, and the main excuse was “it’s for Eddie’s family”. Now Eddie’s widow and his kids are homeless. Way to go. Took real good care of them. I’m sure Johnny Ace called them up and offered one of his sensitive speeches. “Hope you saved your money.” The rating for the show came in, and it wasn’t good. A 3. Ouch. Now, the NCAA finals drew a 6.1, So that excuse doesn’t carry much weight. At all. One thing to consider is that for most of the week, I thought the show was in the old time slot. 10:30 to Midnight. Now, I’m sure there were some other old crufters like me who thought the same thing. Not many, as we can work technology to some degree, enough to find out when the show is on. But I’d be interested to see if SNL’s rating went up a bit. NBC didn’t really hype the show that much. A few spots here and there, and maybe some print ads I missed, and of course radio, but still, they could have done more. By the same count, WWE could have done a lot more as well. Not on Smackdown, that probably wouldn’t have made much difference, but they could have really hyped up the show with appearances, print ads, and so forth. But they didn’t which is understandable. WM is coming up. Save the media blitz for that, since that is the goldmine, and SNME was a freebie. Oh, and NBC, if you want wrestling on your network, there is an alternative to WWE. You could get a whole season, 12 ninety-minute episodes, for a fraction of the price. For say, five million total. TNA They’ll be more than happy to accede to your standards, and will keep the content risk free. Chip in on productions costs, and they’ll job Jarrett to whomever you want. You could put them on Saturday mornings, as part of the teen block. Disclaimers every ten minutes, no problems. Watch this show, no problem. We love you Bob! You’re the greatest! They’ll know who’s doing who a favor, and frankly, they didn’t cost your company $50 million dollars in a previous endeavor. NBC could cover the expense in ad revenue and not worry about trying to score ratings. Hell, TNA would probably get the same numbers. Yeah, that rating is going to be a problem. I wonder if it snapped management out of their nostalgia trip yet? Probably not. They’re too busy coming up with ways to blame RVD. Why RVD? Uh, he’s there? Hello! Oh, and for the record, Smackdown drew around a 2.6 for Friday. And that was with pre-emptions. So, it’s not UPN’s fault for Smackdown’s rating. Friday is the new battleground, as a bunch of networks are trying to create a night “Must See” night. So that was the week in wrestling. Oh, minus Impact for 3-18. I’ll get to that one eventually, But not this week. Man, this column is late. Not Kane’s House? No, not this week. Let’s give Brett Hart the week off. I’m sure WWE is hatching some crazy plan to bring him in, whether he wants to go or not. He had a stroke people. His health is better, because he’s NOT in the ring. That’s how taking time off to heal works. Ask Undertaker and he’ll tell you all about it. So, I think I’ll wrap this column up. It’s a new week. And I’ll be back next Sunday. Or this Sunday, depending on where you live. QUICK PLUGS! LOP Forums! LOP Columns Forum The PWA, best E-Fed on the net, period. DVD Fanatic, the Ultimate DVD Resource Feeling Creative? Check out The Project. They're looking for submissions. Until next Time, Thanks For Readin’ and Thanks For Ridin’ Wevv Mang mrwevv@mac.com *NEW GALLERY* AMAZING!! More Uncensored Kelly Kelly Bikini Photos! Very Rare!
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