Wrestling in a Bottle: Dear Santa...
    Submitted by Snapple on Sunday, December 25, 2005 at 1:20 AM EST



    Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone. If you don't celebrate Christmas, that's okay, too. The Snapple man wants everyone to be in a good mood here in the final week of 2005.

    Nothing says holiday spirit like letters to Santa Claus. Because I'm a fink, I did an inside job at the post office and have been able to intercept some letters from famous wrestling personalities so that I might share them with all of you. It's always interesting to see what people are wishing for this time of the year.



    Dear Santa,

    Please help Steph put on a few extra pounds. She's still too skinny. I even jobbed to a few guys this years, so you OWE me. Also, feel free to talk to Vince about another Wrestlemania main event.

    Sincerely,
    Hunter



    Dear Santa,

    Hey man, can I get some... Cheetos? And some... Funyuns? Oh, and some of that good Columbian stuff. You know what I mean. Also, please don't let the WWE stick me in another throw-together tag team.

    Sincerely,
    Rob



    Dear Santa,

    Hey yo. Spot me a drink, and see what you can do about this probation thing. My officer has some kind of grudge against people having fun.

    Sincerely,
    Scott



    Dear Santa,

    Please give us some credibility.

    Sincerely,
    The WWE Cruiserweight Division



    Dear Santa,

    I'M COMIN'... TO GETCHA! (drooling worms)

    Sincerely,
    The Boogeyman

    PS I'd like some Beanie Babies.



    Dear Satan,

    Thanks for everything once again this year.

    Sincerely,
    Vince



    Dear Santa,

    Please don't let Steve hit me anymore. I promise I'll keep his dinner warm this time.

    Sincerely,
    Debra



    Dear Santa,

    Joanie won't let me leave the house anymore. SEND FOR HELP. SHE'S COMING BACK IN THE ROOM RIGHT NOW.

    Sincerely,
    Sean



    Dear Santa,

    I want to be bigger than that roody-poo candyass Vin Diesel. :(

    Sincerely,
    Rocky



    Dear Santa,

    I want to have a job next year...

    Sincerely,
    Nunzio


    DEAR MR. CLAUS,

    QUIT CORRUPTATING THE MINDS OF THE CHILDREN WITH YOUR LIBERAL QUEER PROPANGATION OF DESTRUCITY. ALSO, I WOULD LIKE AN XBOX 360.

    ALWAYS BELIEVE,
    WARRIOR



    Dear Santa,

    Please just give me a chance to meet Randy Orton. I would gladly give myself to him to do with whatever he wants. I would be putty in his arms.

    Sincerely,
    Snapple



    Err... I don't know how that last letter got in there. It must be some kinda prank. Pay absolutely no attention to it.

    Happy holidays, everyone.

    -Snapple

    tasteless@gmail.com




    *NEW GALLERY* AMAZING Recent Pix of Candice Michelle Soaking Herself for Diggnation! WOW!

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