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Submitted by Wevv Mang on Sunday, June 26, 2005 at 6:45 PM EST
Ridin’ With The Bossman – The Long Goodbye Greetings! Welcome to another edition of Ridin’ With The Bossman! The column Triple H doesn’t want you to know about. Well, we got ourselves a slow week in wrestling. Not much news, not many rumors, but apparently, a lot of people still have something to say. Interviews galore this week. But that doesn’t mean that there’s nothing to talk about. You see, it’s going to be a big week of wrestling. We got a PPV, the final week of “randomly” selected lotteraft picks, the Divas Search gets into swing, and then there’s long plane ride, and those are always good for hijinks. So, let’s get cracking. Oh, and there’s an announcement at the end. But first, WWE TV – The Series Before we start this off, there’s one observation I’d like to make. Is there any sign of ECW being incorporated into regular WWE programming? There’s none that I can see. Some of the guys have shown up on TV. But other than that, the lesson that the ECW PPV taught is being soundly ignored, and in some ways, I’d say rebelled against. Instead of putting on high quality matches, we’ve been bombarded with crappy drama, and silly angles. The good news is no angles have been created for the creative geniuses of WWE to FUBAR. The bad news is that no ECW based matches, which means really good wrestling, have been used. In other words, the template for an ECW match has not been used. Instead we got plenty of punching and kicking, but no real show stopping spots. On the other plus side, the longer ECW stays away, the better. See, if WWE was serious about ECW, then they would rush it back and it would suck, because frankly, as we’ve seen so many times, WWE has no clue. I mean, really, WWE’s idea of good is not what others would call good. Raw Recap info provided by Carl Walsh I was LIVE! At the America West Arena! SO, I’ll compare live reactions to that of the taped. I did get to see the show, that to the miracle of tape delay on the West Coast. First, it was fucking hot. JR even said it was 111 degrees. He wasn’t lying. It was that hot. Nothing like standing in line outside for 45 minutes. Whew. That sucked. Inside, it was a good crowd. The upper level was blacked off on the camera side. But the place was packed and ready for some wrestling. A lot of young kids with parents who had never seen the show. Since it was on at 9 PM and on cable. So those poor suckers had no idea what was in store for them. Kids love Cena. Heat looks like it will be a good show. Tajiri vs Conway, Hurricane and Rosey. Of course, Masters was there too, and that guy may be good some day, but he has a way to go. Place went absolutely nuts when Cena came out. Easily the biggest pop of the night. I liked Cena’s line “ Spankings! Ah, glorious spankings!”. Nice one. Folks were shocked when Carlito came through, as I heard a lot of people hoping it might be Big Show or Undertaker. The wedding just killed the crowd. Very nice job of editing out the huge “Boring!” chant during the wedding. Some “ We want matt” chants, but not huge. When the Matt Hardy intro played, people were on their feet, but not going nuts. After the wedding, and the Cena vs Hassan match, the crew came out to fix the middle rope, which is why the match may have been short. Took them quite a while to fix it, and then every other match was short. Except the main event. I knew when the wedding stated, as a bunch of people fled out to concession stands and bathrooms. NO ONE was looking forward to it. From the show itself, the Victoria attack on Christy was bad. And cheesy galore. Viscera and Lillian were amusing and yes, the guy is now over and getting H-like pops. Quick H observation. Five years, millions of dollars, dragging the biggest names back to get H where he is and Viscera does it in three months with some Nachos. Main event was decent. Angle and HBK were over more than Batista, though I was sad to learn that Angle’s awesome in ring promo was dropped from the broadcast show. Great job from Angle and if he hadn’t done it, Batista entry pop would have been embarrassing low. Overall, a pretty lame show. It was god to see live, but the wedding sucked the life from it. Two things to take from this show. If Kane had grabbed Edge’s briefcase, he would have had the “money In the Bank” and it could have made the feud something other than Management’s pissing on Matt Hardy. Instead of the lame ass “I’m Back!” when he didn’t go anywhere, we could have had “ You took something from me, now I take something from you!” Which could have had Edge torn between his slut and his title shot, and made for some interesting angles. It was clear as day, and we were yelling for Kane to take the briefcase. The other thing is this. The Matt Hardy situation is a work. Matt has been “fired” but what if it’s all just a work on the internet crowd? Key things to consider. Hardy could sue the WWE for wrongful termination. While WWWE does own the Matt Hardy intro, Vince is a very vindictive man, and would never give away free pub if he can help it and he can. And last thing on the Matt Hardy situation. If he does show up on TV, what then? One night of “Oh MY GOD!” and seven weeks of “this sucks ass!”. Matt Hardy isn’t going to make this angle any better, in fact, it will get worse. That’s my call. So brace yourselves. And prepare to be disappointed. Nothing wrong with hoping for the best, but there’s a good chance you’re going to get the worst. It’s how I can still watch wrestling. Smackdown Recap info provided by Brandon Scott Berthelot Show opened with more on the Eddie vs Rey bit. Orton Shows Some Fire Orton explains why he is happy to be on Smackdown. He is a Legend Killer and will end the Undertaker’s career. Taker then shows up and Randy runs off. Not completely pussylike, but with a purpose. For one brief second it seemed like some one would stand up to Taker, instead of pissing themselves when he shows up. As Randy stops at the top of the entryway, for one last taunt, Lightning strikes, and Randy is DOWN! He’s DOWN! - I really do hope that Randy shows some balls in this feud. Some one needs to grows a set when they face Taker. Joey Mercury vs Heidenreich Joey wins, and Nitro almost kills himself. Well, Tommy Dreamer did once say that Joey Mathews and Christian York were the future of tag team wrestling. But that wasn’t the scariest part of this match. That was when the crowd supported Heidenreich. That is just terrifying. JBL, Suck Up JBL goes to teddy’s office and sucks up to him. He says that he should just be given the new title, like H. I mean, it worked so well, didn’t it? But later, Bradshaw is in the ring proclaiming himself to be a wrestling God, when Booker comes out and says he will be champion. Benoit comes out, and says make it a three way. Big Show then comes out and says there are two ways this could happen. Benoit, Booker and he could just beat up Bradshaw and then have the tournament, or it could be a Fatal Fourway. Nice job, Show. Teddy then comes out and Bradshaw sucks up to him. Teddy then says it will be a Fearsome Fiveway, when Hassan shows up , the New Lotteraft pick. Hassan gets into the tournament. Since Taker has the other spot, it is now a Sinister Six way. Well, we got ourselves another tournament. I’m really starting to get burned out on these, since the last couple meant absolutely nothing in the end. Mexi-cools OK, this is just stupid. I have a ton to say on the topic,. It’s going to be my OAW. Big Show vs Hassan Yes, I’m jumping around in the match listing. Big Show loses to Hassan. That’s all you really need to know. Eddie vs Rey Next week is the final battle. Finally. From a wrestling standpoint, this was a solid match. I really didn’t expect anything else, but it’s something I’ve seen before and I just can’t get behind the story. Eddie is a promo god, no doubt about that. Rey has been doing well, but these constant flashbacks are killing me. The guy who does the video packages needs to be replaced. His constant use of repeating over the spots is not helping the angles, instead it’s the hammer to head approach and is actually weakening them. I miss Dave Sahadi. It’s too bad he works for TNA now, where his talent is wasted. Back to wrestling. Well actually not. It was a painful week to watch wrestling. I’m really bummed on the product now. I’m seriously thinking of just walking away for a while. Maybe now is a good time to start those side projects I have been putting off…. Over-Analyzing The Draft, Week 3 Raw John Cena Kurt Angle And the Draft Picl This Week Is Carlito The addition of Carlito is puzzling. Carlito had a good angle going on Smackdown. Yes, Matt Morgan was involved, but that could be over looked. Granted the last few weeks have not been good, but there was hope he could rise back to this popularity. In other words, there was plenty for Carlito to do. By moving to Raw, Carlito does have some nice feud possibilities. Christian, Jericho, Ric Flair, and so forth, and his feud with Shelton could be really good. But, it will all be background noise, since the show is already stacked with angles waiting to happen. On Smackdown, Big Show wasn’t finished, Orlando waited, and of course, there was Eddie and Rey, Chavo, and more that haven’t even been tapped yet. His popularity had room to grow, especially in light of the recent defections. But there may be more at work here. The Mexi-cools just showed up, and Carlito may have been moved as a protective measure from an out of control Bradshaw. But the fact is, Raw just got a true star in the making, and the Raw roster is already bloated with talent. Smackdown Benoit Randy Orton And the Pick This Week Is: Hassan and Daviari This isn’t a plus. While Hassan was getting some good heat on Raw, his move to Smackdown doesn’t help at all. His quick pin was not the way to send him off, and really did nothing for Cena, pother than become a blip on the stat sheet. On Smackdown, what does he have to look forward too? Endless abuse from Bradshaw is what. And that’s not good. While Davairi does fit in with the cruisers, he’s not the main guy, and frankly, isn’t even close to being a main guy. The cruisers are not a priority or even thought of when it comes time to book matches. In WWE eyes, they are filler. Period. So, that leaves Hassan out in the cold. In fact, on Raw, a new angle was being taken with his character, that was about to keep him fresh and interesting. The Asshole American line. It was catching on. Now, he has to start from scratch basically. See, Hassan had people who expected to see him on Raw, and there were angles waiting to happen. While in management’s eyes, Hassan is a big deal, to fans he’s not. This move just reeks of politics. I can see Bradshaw sucking up to Vince to get hi over on Smackdown so that he can squash him. Taker will have no problem squashing him. To Orlando, anything that takes the heat off him is a plus. No, angles that may happen on Smackdown would have worked better on Raw. Frankly, there is no potential for Hassan on Smackdown. If it was a push they were looking for, then Raw was the place for that push. On Smackdown, he really is out of place. Kane’s House Will go on hiatus. I’ve hit a dead end, and frankly, I thin kit best just to stop this tale now and go back to the drawing board. Oh, there are some ideas to still use, but I think I’ll just work them into separate stories sometime down the line. It’s just too damn hard trying to top the McMahon Mart saga. Hey, at least JR got lit on fire again. Besides, I have some news bit to cover Over-Analyzing Wrestling Today’s Topic: Bad Drama During the NBA finals, a curious thing happened. Rasheed Wallace had his WWE titles at game six. He got interviewed with the belt. The announcer wouldn’t say the WWE’s name. He wanted to desperately avoid talking about wrestling. Why? Because WWE will do something stupid with it. A couple of years ago, during an NFL game, Clinton Portis had a WCW championship belt on his shoulder. The cameras panned to Portis and the belt was seen and remarked upon by the commentators. I’ll never forget Greg Gumbels comment. “Wrestling? That’s worthless” Again, WWE has tried to live up to that standard. You’ve heard it before. Wrestling has a bad reputation of being lowbrow entertainment, which is a polite way of saying that WWE is crass, crude, and rude and has no taste what so ever. A few years ago, there was a crusade against the WWE. The Parents Television Council went after wrestling saying that the violence was too much. That there were sexual overtones that were unsuitable for children and the program should be taken off the air. Fans rallied. See, most of the fans were not young kids. Some were, but the majority was a bunch of teenagers, with computers and the ability to use them. Fans fought back. Dirt was dug up, and thrown around. Eventually, the PTC apologized and had to pay restitution. However, the flip side was, WWE went off the deep end and threw even more crap at us than ever before. Stalkers every few months. Racist angles. Incest. Just weird crap. Bad crap. It was and still is, bad drama overload. The goal has been accomplished, WWE is now a soap opera, and not a good one. What’s funny is that even REAL soap operas are struggling to survive on TV. Here’s a link: History Of Soap Operas But the racist part was usually played down, until it would flare up. Usually not too high, but now, it’s going on overload. Long gone are the days when you could ignore either Rodney Mack or Mark Henry’s White Boy Challenge. Even Booker T’s brutal crushing at the hands of H was quick, and over in a month. Eddie and Chavo made a huge success out of Lie Cheat and Steal, and then were broken up and cast to the winds. Because it was never the plan to get them over. Remember the talk about Rey challenging for the title around that time? Both are pretty far from the main event scene. Now, you got two guys from the ECW PPV, who had high profile matches, and this is how they get debuted? Super Crazy was immensely over. Oh, and just wait until Bradshaw gets to cut his promo on Hassan. Holy fuck, is that going to be bad. Moving Hassan to anywhere near Bradshaw is just idiotic. The Mexi-cools coming out on the lawnmower, was amusing, but in the long run, come on. This is just sad. Let’s cut the crap and just say it. Call them spics and beaners. Have folks call Booker and Orlando niggers and have down with it. Call Akio and Kenzo gooks. And at last, just turn Bradshaw into the Wrestling Nazi, whose mission is to ethnically cleanse Smackdown. There’s your fucking racist angle WWE. The one you keep pussy footing around. Just go ahead and pull the trigger already, you stupid fucks. And you wonder why Viacom doesn’t want to spend time and money on WWE? You wonder why other networks won’t mention the WWE? Why wrestling, while the number one cable programming had trouble getting on other networks? You really think USA won’t, at the last minute, put a bunch of restrictions on WWE? Of course they aren’t going to bring it up now, or when negotiations were going on, but it will happen. I hoe WWE realizes that the only reason USA signed the deal was so that they can get the 3 million views wrestling brings with it hooked on other USA programs. That’s the part that kills me the most. You think USA is happy to see stuff like the Mexi-cools? Hell no. It just lives up the bad image wrestling has. So why do it? The answer is simple but complex. 1) To rally the fans around the product when those bad old censors come calling. How dare these outsiders tell us what we want on TV? Much like the fans rallied around the WWF when the PTC attacked. But there is a huge difference. Fans don’t like that shit any more than the censors do. In fact, fans have been telling WWE to cut the crap for years. But it a hope that the Us against Them mentality will assert itself. In an interesting contrast, this may be what ultimately gave WWE the edge back in the day. Fans rallied to WWE because they needed out help. Now, fans are smarter, and know that if problems with content do occur, that WWE has only itself to blame. 2) Vince Loves To Stick It To The Man If Vince can stick it to an old enemy, Vince will. Those networks snub WWE? Fine, regardless of cost to self, he will go out of his way to make them look bad. If it takes putting crappy content on TV, then by god, we’ll have Mark Henry for 2 whole hours while Rikishi sings “Put a Little Ass On It”, and makes a video. No lengths are too far for Vince to go. 3) At This Point, Any Press Is Better Than None Notice, I didn’t say good press. WWE will go to great lengths to get people talking about the product. The Necrophilia angle was driven by this rational almost entirely. It was just a bonus that it humiliated Kane. WWE wants its name in the paper, and if the news is bad, and people become outraged, well, see point one. WWE is hoping that people will tune in to see this “shocking” behavior. It’s been the style for the past four years, and frankly, it hasn’t worked. See, the problem is, folks may tune in once, but getting them to come back, well, let’s get even more outrageous, more shocking, more tasteless. Like next week on Smackdown when Bradshaw rips into Hassan. 4) It Worked For Vince Russo, Didn’t It? Really more of a comment on the whole process than a rationale. It’s a downward spiral. It tanked WCW, with endless swerves designed to be shocking. It did keep ECW afloat for a while, but over time, it couldn’t support everything. WWE lived it’s Attitude Era until the only Attitude left was Apathy. No, this latest round of racism is being used officially for the above reasons, but the secondary reason is to kick a kick out of humiliating talent. Orlando being called Buckwheat, not for a good reason, but for kicks. Mexi-Cools, to drive away any recollection that these guys can wrestle. Sure, they will, but if you’re expecting a repeat of ECW, well, you’re going to be disappointed. “Asians? What Asians? We have Asians working for WWE? Oh yeah, that guy, well, I got an idea for him…” They are going to Asia soon, so just wait. And WWE wonders why the mainstream press won’t cover them. It’s even simpler. It’s because of crap like this that proves that the general impression of wrestling, being crappy TV, is proved 100% right. And every “shocking” and “despicable” act just reinforces the fact in peoples mind. Do you tell other other people you watch wrestling? Or do you say: “Wrestling? That’s worthless!” Yep, a short one today. But that could change quickly, Time for a plethora of newsblurbs, and links. TNA Going to Spike TNA may have to pay Spike to appear on their network. That is just so funny, and really shows where TNA stands. If Spike is willing to give out shows to Lance Krall, John Henson, and so forth, but make TNA pay, well, you get the point. Poor TNA. See, Jerry may be able to schmooze these money people one on one into giving him cash, but when it comes to TV, there’s a huge difference. See, Network execs gets schmoozed all the time and don’t fall for any of the shit that Jerry may use. So they schmooze right back. They know the game, probably better than Jerry. Network TV won’t keep TNA alive. See, here’s the deal. Let’s debunk some numbers. Spike TV reaches, oh let’s say 70 million homes, though the number is higher. Raw, the #1 rated show on Spike hits about 4 million viewers. So, that’s 5% of the market. 5% for the biggest name in wrestling. With a worldwide presence. Understand this. Reaching 80 million homes is a good thing in theory only. It doesn’t mean shit, if only a fraction of them are actually watching the network. Period. It’s not going to magically transform into money for your company. It is not the magic bullet that will make your company a success. Use the $30,000 dollars per episode you may have to pay Spike to syndicate in markets where people actually watch the show. For maybe three grand a pop you can put the show on in Philadelphia, Memphis, or Chicago. It may be cable access. It doesn’t matter. TV is exposure. If you’re not going to get paid to appear on TV, you may as well make that money work for you. Grow the fanbase. Sell the merchandise. Come back with numbers. Solid numbers. Make your case. Survive. And most importantly, TELL PEOPLE WHEN THE SHOW IS ON! Only when you get a distribution plan should you start work on fixing the product itself. In terms of story. Free doesn’t mean good. But it doesn’t have to mean crap either. Lauren Jones Bio Removed Randy Orton shows up on the show and one week later she’s gone. Coincidence? I think not.  “Hi Randy.” Yep, didn’t take long did it? The Big News, JBL JBL is apparently bullet proof. Why? Because Vince has been sucked up to like that since the late Eighties. Before the scandals hit. JBL, Old School! And you thought the lube was just part of his gimmick way back when…. Links Of the Week There’s a new guy on the main page. Who is he? Well, you can find out here. All About the Game – FAQ Welcome aboard YourAyatollah. Bryan is a classic. The Movie Bar Forums! They’re all new! Put your stamp on them now. Oh and Speaking of the Movie Bar, Movie Bar Trivia – Play Now! Looser! AFI 100 Top Movie Quotes Loads of fun. PWA Owners Cup Round 2 Results, Complete with Flacon Twist And before we get to the standard plugs, the announcement. Folks, it’s hot in Phoenix. Really hot. That drains me. Add in a TV show that has hit the skids, and well, I think I’m going to take some time off. Two weeks to be precise. Oh, I still have plenty to write about. It’s just that all the shows are doing is just pissing me off when I have to think about them. So, I think I’ll start work on those two side projects I’ve been meaning to get to. Wait, three. No, four. Let’s see, movie script challenge, and then there’s the script I want to start about Big Show and Kurt Angle. I can’t let Gerwitz ruin that pairing. It’s too good. Then there’s IWC Coast 2 Coast, and I’ve been invited to take part. I haven’t been invited back after my try out, but that’s no reason to just give up. Then, there’s the script I’ve been working on forever. You get the point. So, I will be back. But for right now, wrestling is no longer going to be my priority. I’ll just have to let some one else complain about H. I think there are plenty of takers. So, check out the LOP forums, and main page for all your wrestling opinion needs. And like Kane, I will be back, only I’m actually going away. QUICK PLUGS! LOP Forums! LOP Columns Forum PWA – Best E-Fed On The Net The Movie Bar Is Back! New Reviews! New Trivia Contests! Go Show 'em who's Boss! Wevv Mang's Archive! Until Next Time, Thanks For Readin’ And Thanks For Ridin’ Wevv Mang mrwevv@mac.com MUST SEE: Dawn Marie Showing What Made Her Famous! WOW!
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