The Wrath of Tito - Monday Night RAW review, WM 21 buyrate, more Hardy/Edge/Lita stuff, more
Submitted by Mr. Tito on Tuesday, April 26, 2005 at 6:54 PM EST
You must've given up on hairplugs cause now you're going toupee... Welcome to the Wrath of Tito, the column that brings the thunder (not WCW) every Tuesday or Wednesdays. I actually have a bunch of column ideas stuck in my head right now, with one looking at Spike TV and another looking at Hulk Hogan, thanks to reader responses to my column last week. Today, we'll look at Monday Night RAW and review the latest in wrestling headlines...
-The BIG NEWS OF THE WEEK is the successful buyrate of Wrestlemania 21. Close to 1 million buys and pretty much beat expectations by several hundred thousand buys. Congrats to the WWE. After many embarrassing buyrates since Wrestlemania 20, the WWE needed some sort of good news to prop them up and give them a sign that they gave wrestling fans what they wanted. The WWE deserves credit for what I thought was a well compiled show. Several matches didn't pan out, but at least the WWE went with one-on-one matches this year instead of making multi-wrestler clusterfucks like the years before.
What drew the big buyrate? Several factors... First, I personally feel that many hardcore WWE fans wanted to see Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle. I'd pay for any Pay Per View with THAT first time match up, and I know many others who would as well. Secondly, 2 newer stars going for Gold. Cena and Batista are both new babyface superstars going for their first titles. They were up against two superstars whom the people wanted to lose (HHH and JBL) and people were willing to pay to see their title victories (even though I felt both matches sucked). Randy Orton vs. Undertaker was a unique match-up and I'm sure a few bought the show for those guys (not as much as Angle vs. HBK, by any means). The appearances of Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper, and Steve Austin definitely drew fans... I'm sure many Hispanic fans wanted to see Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero on such a grand stage. And ladder matches have been great, historically, on Wrestlemania shows. Plus, this show had great commercials hyping the show up.
It was a well put together show and the WWE hyped it well. The show, as a whole, I felt was a 2 trick show with a good series of endings to Orton vs. Undertaker. HBK vs. Kurt Angle and the Ladder Matches were the only real strong points to the show. I felt that Batista vs. HHH and JBL vs. John Cena sucked as a double main event feature, while Guerrero vs. Mysterio was disappointing because Mysterio had to fix his mask the entire match. I don't know where people are getting the idea that Undertaker vs. Orton was a good match. You had Orton's VERY limited offense going against a guy who no-sold every move? You call THAT a good worked match? The ending, though, was very good with Cowboy Bob Orton interfering and Orton countering the chokeslam with an RKO. As I said a while ago, don't let a fantastic finish dictate how bad the entire match was. Hemme vs. Trish sucked and I wonder if working with Hemme has injured Trish's neck?
I'll definitely give Wrestlemania 21 another shot once it comes out on DVD on May 10th. However, I doubt things will change based on previous opinions, THOUGH I disliked HBK vs. HHH vs. Benoit on first viewing but really enjoyed it on second viewing (Wrestlemania 20 was too long...).
-Hey, what would a wrestling column be without Edge/Lita/Matt Hardy love triangle stuff? Matt Hardy seems to be making the rounds on talkshows these days, where he seems to be very critical of Edge and Lita (especially Edge), but he holds back on criticisms of the WWE. Hey, Matt was stupid for airing dirty laundry out in public, but he's not stupid to rip the WWE Empire a new one. He said he enjoyed his WWE experience, repeatedly, and didn't take the bait to bash someone like Triple H. Given the nature of comebacks in the WWE (Sable after suing the WWE, Hogan after testifying against the WWE and being their competition, Goldust after bashing the WWE, Paul Bearer after bashing the WWE, etc.), I wouldn't doubt that both Matt Hardy and Jeff Hardy would return to the WWE someday. The simple fact is that the WWE is the ONLY wrestling promotion in America with a prime-time cable slot. Until that fact changes, you don't dare bite the hand that fed you.
Matt was on "Between the Ropes" and "Opie & Anthony" this week and outside of ripping the WWE, Matt Hardy didn't hold back, especially on Edge. With Edge, or as Matt is quick to mention, Adam Copeland, Matt has been repeating what soon-to-be-ex-wife Lisa Copeland said in her statement about Edge taking steroids. With the sports world getting ate up by steroid allegations, if the media wants to restart a steroid fire with professional wrestlers, it's allegations like this that could fuel it. Secondly, Matt stated that Edge cheated on BOTH of his wives. I can't remember reading if Edge admitted to cheating on Lana Morley, his first wife and sister of Val Venis in his book? I don't think so, which makes me wonder what's up with the book? Plus, Matt is suggesting that the majority of the WWE locker room is currently against Edge for what he did to Matt and how this personal situation helped to get Matt released. Jericho speaking out on the subject, I feel, backs that up.
This is going to get uglier and uglier unless the WWE does something about this situation. I am NOT suggesting that Edge or Lita get punished. Why should a personal life matter reflect your work status? Neither should be depushed. As I've said before, Lita could have said "NO" to Edge, told Matt about it, and Matt could have went to the WWE road agents or McMahons to report the situation. Instead, Lita cheated on her boyfriend of 6 years, lied to Matt repeatedly to piss him off, and Matt aired his frustration publicly on the internet after a build up of lies. Now, we have "WE WANT MATT" or "YOU SCREWED MATT" chants, that in my opinion, will forever haunt Edge and Lita for the rest of their wrestling lives! The news of this situation is spreading like wildfire... As I've suggested before, maybe 10% of wrestling fans check out the internet... However, I believe that the chants and signs in the crowd have sparked more interest into this story than before. I see the stats on LordsofPain.net on Hardy/Edge/Lita stories and the hits are CRAZY! I believe that crowd members are spreading stories of Lita & Edge at the shows, and thus more chants are happening. Hell, I believe that chanting or heckling Edge and Lita is actually drawing fans! I'm sure it's fun to ruin Lita's segments with chants and to boo Edge even more at the events for what he did to his former friend, Matt Hardy.
As I suggest in my RAW rant even further, turn Lita heel and make her valet Edge. It might not be professional and may be insulting to Edge, but this is the company who kept insulting Bret Hart after he left the company due to a behind the scenes problem, too. And hey, that screwjob helped build the WWE into an empire, believe it or not, for it created a grand heel in Vince McMahon for Steve Austin to feud with.
-I'm TIRED of people ripping Shawn Michaels because he doesn't want to turn heel. First of all, who would jeer him? Look at old veterans like the Undertaker or even Hulk Hogan. Hogan tried to be a heel in 2002 with the NWO but got CHEERED! The Undertaker heel turn a few years ago was a total embarrassment, as live fans cheered for him anyway. If Shawn Michaels is wrestling a face whom I think is worthless, I'm cheering for Shawn Michaels if he's a heel! HBK isn't what he used to be, either. His attitude has changed and I believe he's not the cocky bastard as he once was in the 1990's under drugs and heavy into backstage politics. He's a born again Christian, and you can tell that by demeanor. I saw him in person during late 2002 and he was very nice to everyone at the signing. You can see it in his face that he generally enjoys performing, unlike many current WWE superstars who are currently going through the motions.
HBK is a face and nothing should change that. He's not the same person who did crotch-chops 8 years ago and fans won't honestly boo him... unless he wrestles in Canada and sometimes in New York City. Why turn a guy heel when chances are it won't work anyway? The WWE would be better off giving HBK new match ups, like a move to Smackdown, or feeding HBK newly turned heels and having HBK put them over. I would respect HBK's wishes not to turn heel because he's one of the absolute best performers that the WWE has right now. That's not treating him like a primadonna, but it's a matter of respect and HBK has earned that by putting his back on the line every night. Do you even realize how dangerous it is to take a beating with a fused spine? I actually do...
-Rumors suggest that Chris Jericho appears to be re-signing with the WWE. His contract expires around in November. While the WWE contract probably pays the overall best on the market, especially in a guaranteed sense, it proves to me that Chris Jericho is going through the motions. I'm saying this as a personal and longtime fan of Chris Jericho's work. Since winning the Undisputed Title in late 2001, Jericho's career has been in shambles by the WWE creative team. Jericho just looks overall unhappy when he's in the ring. You can just see it in his face and the energy Jericho once had wrestling, especially in 2000 and 2001, his best years, is long gone. He's unappreciated by his employer yet Jericho wants to keep working there? This is definitely a consequence of the WWE monopoly of the cable television market, and a very sad one at that. Jericho HAS the potential to go further with his career but the WWE chains are keeping him down in the midcard. Yet he wants to re-sign with the WWE instead of maybe becoming the major help NWA-TNA needs instead of the dinosaurs they are currently bringing in?
-Surreal Life 4 finally wrapped up. Despite its 7 or 8 pre-emptions, this WAS the best cast ever. I am not looking foward to the next show which will no doubt spotlight the primadonna from the Apprentice. Chyna seemed to really connect with this cast and was very emotional leaving the house. Sean Waltman has tried to call 3 times since his appearance, which is somewhat sad. Seeing Chyna on Howard Stern after this show was taped was truly sad, for she's an emotional wreck and she needed some sort of family support. Surreal Life 4 oddly gave her that, but it's hard to say if anybody will keep in touch. Marcus Schakenburg (sp?) was a good crutch for her and he has been seen hanging out with her outside of this show. That's good and VH1 has gave Joanie Laurer a side job commenting on several celebrity shows as well. She needs something that will kick her in the ass and get her motivated to get clean from drugs and alcohol.
Whether she likes it or not, she's a wrestler... I would suggest entering some sort of rehab clinic, get cleaned up, and hit the indy circuit. I'm sure she could make a decent living at wrestling again if she tried. She's currently trying to act, sing, and model... all 3 are failing. What made her the most money in life? WRESTLING! Wrestling is one of the few places where freakish or not-so-pretty women can actually make good money. For Christ's sake, the late Sapphire did well for herself as Dusty Rhodes's manager and she was no beauty. Even Nicole Bass made money in wrestling... See what I mean? And maybe, just maybe, the WWE might give her a second chance... NAH!
I have nothing more to say... Let's get RAW!
RAW is TITO
The show started off with Batista coming out to the ring for a promo. FINALLY, the focus of the show begins with its new champion. See, the continuous problem with Triple H is that RAW is either about Triple H's dominance as champion OR Triple H's chase to get the world title back. It's NEVER about the guys who actually defeat Triple H, as Bill Goldberg, Chris Benoit, and even Randy Orton have learned about. Batista, with poorly scripted lines, introduces Jim Ross and we are supposed to care about him defeating HHH last week? While I believe Jim Ross deserves all of the props in the world for the 10+ years of hard work that he's put into RAW/WWE, the WWE has gone to the "wrestler attacks Ross" well too often. I mean Jesus, every time they are in Oklahoma.... This would prompt Triple H to ruin the segment, as if it could get any worse... After badly scripted lines and articles of clothing removed later, Batista and HHH never squared off. What will be funny is how the real draw is Hogan & Shawn Michaels tagging up and that will give creative member HHH reason to think that HIS match was the draw at Backlash. The WWE needs to either give Batista better scripted lines to say or let him speak from the heart. Utterly pathetic seeing him talk.
GREAT use of Viscera here, as he took Trish Stratus out to dinner. The first segment had him saying he was late because he had to stop at the drug store, but not for drugs... He then pulls out a whole strip of condoms. These segments were killing me, as Viscera played it cool and Trish freaked out the entire time. The WWE is using Viscera perfectly as an enhancement talent. People knock how bad this match will be... But the point is to advance the Trish vs. Lita storyline as well as giving Kane a convincing win over a 500 pounder. It's always suggested that fatter people are harder to kidnap, as I'm sure they are harder to wrestle.
Next, we had our first match between Sylvain Grenier vs. Chris Jericho. Short match and somewhat of an easy victory by Chris Jericho, despite Rob Conway ringside. Afterward, Conway attacks. I find that Hassan and Daivari have taken La Resistance's heat away... Anyway, you can guess who made the save here, as Shelton Benjamin makes the save. Jericho, however, was upset at the save and Benjamin then slams him with his finisher in response. Their match could be solid at Backlash, but I fear nobody will know who to cheer or jeer for? I'm still insisting that Shelton Benjamin should be turned into an Evolution member. Oh wait, that would mean he'd have to be a close friend of HHH's to get into the group (which Batista and Orton actually ARE). Whoops....
Funny stuff with Viscera ordering an entire page of a menu while at dinner with Trish. Based on what I've heard Big Show's diet was, I wouldn't doubt that's true for Viscera. I actually patted Viscera on the back at an indy event in 2002. It's like a really hard flab, at least on the fat that's on his back. Despite being that big, he seems to be one who is somewhat naturally large with his frame. I doubt he could lose much weight if he tried.
And now, we see Christian making strides before our very eyes! He had a great backstage segment with Ric Flair. See, they are cutting Christian loose on his promos again, much like they did in 2000 with the famous Edge & Christian team. He's being more of himself instead of the stuck-up prick they were portraying him as. Christian even shot on Triple H and then kicked Flair out of his lockerroom.
Next, it even gets BETTER when Christian hits the ring and grabs the mic. He talks some good smack on Batista, but the best material was him shitting on John Cena. He's done this for a few weeks and I wonder what the very cautious creative team is doing? Usually, the WWE tries to protect their top faces, especially avoiding another guy from another roster ripping on them. Christian could actually get over as a face based on these comments, because in my opinion, I believe that John Cena has lost SOME steam as a babyface as of late... I think Cena's shitty in-ring performances and toned down rhymes aren't helping... After a very good promo by Christian, Kane, for some reason, runs down and attacks Tyson Tomko while Christian runs away. Did I miss something? Why did Kane run down?
Backstage, we get MORE of Christian, as he first talks to Ric Flair at the Evolution door and then talks to Triple H. Both were pissed about earlier comments made by Christian, but HHH wanted to talk business since Christian was wrestling Batista later that night. I could take and accept Christian as an Evolution member... Christian is RED HOT tonight, based on his promo-cutting skills alone! Did the WWE just miss 3 years or so by ignoring such potential?
Chris "I go from suck to blow" Masters comes out for a 1000 pound (or about $1,904 based on the current currency rate of $/pound... damn weak US dollar!!!!) challenge. He picks an obvious plant, once again, who is another guy in shape and just standing around in the crowd. How the fuck is this supposed to draw a dime? Masters has zero charisma, terrible mic skills, a very plain look outside of extra bulk, and the WWE has him using 1980's techniques in order to get over as a heel. What's wrong with this picture? Once again, the plant couldn't get out of the "Masterlock". How predictable. You'd figure that a face wrestler would get sick of Masters already and actually come out during this segment already. But the WWE wants to drag this stupid shit out...
"Backstage" or so we're led to believe, Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels cut a promo... That's great, now the British knows how I feel. Everytime I've expected to see Hogan live, both in 2002 and 2003, I've been denied by Hogan not being there. To make the promo even more oldschool, Hogan drags in Mean Gene, to which I mark out. This was a very fun promo, as you can see both Hogan and HBK having loads of fun with it. Jesus, put the tag titles on these guys and let them draw money! Why let the titles rot on a tag division that the WWE openly admits is a joke? Let HBK and Hogan tag up as champions and let them wrestle La Resistance, Hassan/Daivari, Regal/Tajiri, and other teams on a regular basis. Why not?
Next, we had 3 Diva Contestants and Stacy Keibler to come out and dance with 4 British females (all very large breasted... not that I mind). They introduced William Regal and Tajiri and then danced with him while pimping Regal's new autobiography. That could be an interesting read, based on Regal's WCW stuff and when he hit the wall on drug use. Though, I fear it will have very low sales...... This celebration would prompt Muhammad Hassan and Daivari to come out and shoot on the British culture. They eventually challenge Tajiri/Regal to a match, which SHOULD have been a title bout. In addition, they probably pissed off a lot of fans with the ending result...
Hassan/Daivari vs. Regal/Tajiri was next... The crowd was very hot for this match but then was completely gased after the match, based on the result. The heels, in the end of what was somewhat of a short match, destroyed the World Tag champions and more or less beat them cleanly. Daivari, I must say, appears he can go in the ring. Hassan is the guy the WWE groomed while Daivari is the guy they picked up off the indy circuit. Yet, who is the better wrestler? It's no wonder why OVW deserves as much criticism as it does for preparing WWE wrestlers. Afterward, Hassan and Daivari attacked Regal and the fans chanted "Hogan". Why would a guy cut a backstage promo but not come out to attack Hassan/Daivari when opportunity knocks? The WWE apparently didn't think things out and they just shat on the British fans by embarrassing William Regal. Oh yeah, they shat on the World Tag titles, too. I'm all for making Hassan and Daivari look strong, but give them the titles if you're going to let them destroy the tag champs like this. It's called having credibility for your titles.
Back at the restaurant, Trish says she'll knock out Christy Hemme so that Viscera can violate her necrophilia style. However, Viscera wants Trish, which shows Viscera has actual good taste.
The next match was Edge vs. Val Venis. I wonder if this was the WWE's way of winking to fans who know about Edge's love lifes? Matt recently revealed that Edge cheated on his first wife, which was Val's real life younger sister... This match had no crowd heat, either thanks to Regal losing earlier or the fact that it had "SQUASH MATCH" written all over it? Some faint "You Screwed Matt/We Want Matt" chants were heard here, as the great tale of Edge/Lita/Matt Hardy has travelled overseas. I suspect that many British fans follow the WWE mostly online, so I'm sure they came across the story. If the WWE had any brains right now, they would have Lita turn on Kane as soon as possible and have her valet Edge. If this behind the scenes story is spreading like wildfire, it's useless to have Lita as a face. Have her turn heel and make her a TOTAL SLUT. Be sure to have her giving porno kisses to Edge, too, to drive up some major heat. Why not embrace the heel heat that Matt Hardy helped start when he aired dirty laundry in public, which ultimately lost him his job? It would heavily benefit Edge as a heel while giving Lita some much needed new life. I'm sure the Lita/Edge pairing on screen wouldn't be perceived well politically by those backstage, but fuck them. Lita's role as a face is forever ruined and her "marriage" to Kane in the storylines is forever lost by this tabloid story.
Straight out of the McMahon and his stooges era, we now have a corrupt referee in Coach, Ric Flair as the timekeeper at ringside, and Triple H as Christian's new enforcer for the upcoming match with Batista. Not that the WWE is against recycling old angles.... oh no!
Back at the restaurant, the hilarity finishes up with Trish Stratus getting strict with a very horny Viscera by telling him he'd get NOTHING until he defeats Kane. Nice finish... She then flashes Viscera (though you can clearly see Trish with a bra still on) to give Viscera a motivated look on his face. Funny stuff and good segments to actually build up Viscera as an opponent for Kane. Seriously, wouldn't you wrestle your balls off if you knew that you were going to fuck Trish Stratus later that night?
The main event was decent with Christian vs. Batista, but hindered with all kinds of overbooking with the loads of interference surrounding the ring as well as the heel referee. Coach wouldn't count after a while, to which Batista eliminates the referee and defeats Christian with the Sitdown Powerbomb by counting himself. That type of win, though, actually keeps Christian somewhat strong after a good talking night (good job, WWE). Afterward, HHH hit the ring and actually nailed a Pedigree on Batista. OH NO, Batista is doomed this Sunday!!!!!!!! Actually, he'll probably kick out of the move, even though I'm leaning towards a Triple H win this Sunday. Something just doesn't feel right and I feel the WWE doesn't believe in Batista as champion yet.
LAST WORD: Decent show overall, though it had lackluster wrestling. But for storylines sake, Christian was built up quite well and Viscera's stuff with Trish was fantastic. Batista taking the Pedigree but maybe kicking out of it this Sunday will hopefully get the HHH monkey off of Batista's back, or so we'll hope? Batista needs to go unhinged and NOT be held back by a weak WWE creative team. Hassan/Daivari were built up well, though at the expense of the tag champions... Shit like Chris Masters, squash matches, and some other deadweight performers need fixed, heavily. I'll go [ C+ ] on this show...
Mr. Tito's BLOG - Tito opinions on Non-Wrestling Stuff!
LoPForums.com - Message Boards to discuss Sports, Music, Movies, and much more!
Mr. Tito Column Archives
Black Diamond Wrestling.
XWF Inc. Wrestling
Willygoat Valley Wrestling
@If you want to send an e-mail to me, my mailing address is wrathoftito@yahoo.com and please put something in the title to tell me it's not spam, such as "Feedback on the Wrath of Tito" or something to that effect. Please note that my email account gets pounded with emails, whether it's readers or spam. If you receive no reply, sorry, but the majority of the emails are at least read.
Mr. Tito © 1998 - 2005 LordsofPain.net/WrestlingHeadlines.com
*NEW GALLERY* Amazing! RAW's Melina Taking a Shower Backstage!
Quick Links - 
