The Return of LOP's Fact or Fiction: Taboo Tuesday, Kane/Lita, and More
Submitted by Phantom Lord on Monday, September 27, 2004 at 6:27 AM EST





Greetings conversationalist’s all across the fruited plain, It is I your personal Harvester of Sorrow Phantom Lord and this is the ORIGINAL Wrestling’s Fact or Fiction. Yes it’s been a while since I last presented you all with a Fact or Fiction, but I noticed certain other sites that shall remain nameless have been stealing this column. Granted we “borrowed” it from ESPN and made it all our own, but if they think they can do it…then so be it. Just remember, if you want it done right, then come to the best…And your looking at it.

Unlike in past editions, this F.O.F. will not be as length as it will just be me and LOP Columns Forum Mainstay and LOP Forum Legend ValleyBoy. Fear not, the next F.O.F. will have Da Ref back…I just have to make contact with him again when he comes out of his bunker somewhere in South Carolina. This week you will get a small taste of things to come as LOP’s Fact or Fiction is back and it will be better and HOTTER then ever.

Now enough of the small talk…Onto the questions.

Taboo Tuesday will be viewed as a true marker for the power of the Internet and the fans who are on it

Phantom: The way I see it, it will be the ultimate test to how much power the Internet really has. I mean as it is, Joshua Grutman over at Inside Pulse has made the case that we on the Internet should use our collective power to get Ric Flair that title shot against Triple H at Taboo Tuesday. If we can pull that one off, then it will finally show that we on the net do want to see something good. So yeah this is with out a doubt a FACT and hopefully they will give us some real interesting stuff to vote on. Let’s just hope this even goes off as advertised, because I remember WCW trying to do an Internet show way before the advent of Cable and DSL and it was a trainwreck for the few that ordered it. Hopefully the WWE has put more planning into this then some of their recent work.

ValleyBoy: Fiction. It seems that for months now, WWE has been subtly acknowledging the existence of the IWC as a cynical entity during television broadcasts, and not so subtly in their own online columns and commentaries. For the most part, this has been the extent of any Internet power exerted by Vinman & Company. With the exception of the Raw Diva Search, the Internet has been nothing but another medium to shill their shirts and magazines. Now they're coming out with Taboo Tuesday and hyping it as some kind of interactive PPV, where the fans get to decide what happens. Well as I said in a previous column of mine, if the WWE fans pick PPVs the way they pick Raw Diva's then WWE is in trouble. Taboos Tuesday is going to be nothing more than a tease... a little grope under the dress of those gullible Internet marks out there that think that they have a hope in hell of having their dream matches appear on a PPV. Maybe if WWE wasn't going to heavily corral the choices of fans when the voting actually comes around, they might have a shot of making the Internet a more useful tool. This PPV is going to nothing more than a gimmicked ploy to entice some fans that might otherwise skip the fee of paying for the show. It's like Raw Roulette... It's only a gimmick to draw in some buys. If Vinman gave a chipmunk's nut as to what the IWC thought about their product, they might have a more open dialogue with them. Taboo Tuesday is smokescreen from the fact that the Raw storylines have stalled and they need to regroup... fast.

The heat between Eddie and Kurt could build into the next Bret/Shawn episode

Phantom: Wow this is a tough one. I mean on the one hand I can see Eddie becoming the new Bret Hart in the sense that the poor guy seems to be falling apart piece by piece. Kurt Angle is in the HBK role that he can be hurt at any moment and much like HBK did back in the day, he decided to milk an injury and come back when it was good for him and as we’ve seen on Smackdown it is now that he’s gonna have a huge feud with a very re-juvinated Big Show. But as for Eddie and Kurt, supposedly they came to blows at a show last week and with Eddie supposedly being a few french fries short of a happy meal these days who knows what could happen if say Eddie is in a bad mood and Kurt does something to tick him off in the ring. But on the plus side it will lead to many classic encounters and Kurt vs. Eddie will always be a good thing. Lets just hope they work off their anger in the ring. So this is a FACT…lets just hope it doesn’t turn out like the real Bret/Shawn.

ValleyBoy: Fact. It's sounds far fetched sure, but when you think about it you can see that tensions are continuing to mount in WWE. Back in the day when Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels were at eachother's throats in WWF, the company was in a downturn and seriously in danger of losing more core fans. Politics became very rampant backstage and Bret ended up on the losing end of the stick because Shawn played a better game of politics than him. Fast-forward to today and you see that WWE is in a downturn and seriously in danger of losing more core fans. Politics are once again becoming more prevalent backstage (allegedly) and whose name is being bantered about as the instigator of it all? Kurt Angle... that's who. And who's not playing the political game and paying for it? Eddie... that's right. Eddie is getting sent down to slaughter by the politics of Smackdown, while Kurt is choosing to play the game and ensure his place at the top of the heap. If this trend continues, then I see these two butting heads on more than one occasion until one gets sent to Raw or maybe even out on his ass... and it WON'T be Kurt Angle.

Can the angle between Kane and Lita get anymore worse from a moral standpoint or have we seen the bottom of the barrel.

Phantom: Ah my favorite angle ever…Kane and Lita. Just when you think it cant get dumber they go and do a Miscarriage. I think morally speaking they have reached the bottom of the barrel unless we find out the that IWC’s version of The Black Messiah Gene Snitsky was hired by someone to intentionally cause the miscarriage…I don’t think it can get any worse then here. I just hope we don’t end up seeing a funeral for the baby on RAW tomorrow. When it comes to baby’s, Funerals tend to really depress the hell out of people. Hell on the season premiere of ER this week…I got a bit depressed watching Dr. Carter and his girlfriend dumping the ashes of their dead baby into the Chicago river. I don’t think we need to see anything like that on RAW. So yeah it’s a FACT that they have hit the bottom of the barrel…but I knowing the WWE I wouldn’t set that fact in stone.

ValleyBoy: Fact. This is Vinman's company that we're talking about here. Moral standpoint? *hawk pewie* Vince has no morals when it comes to getting ratings. You can take all of the critical lambasting that this storyline has taken from the IWC and flush it down the toilet, along with the backlash of the Katie Vick angle, HLA, and "Pepper" steak. Kane and Lita have managed to pull in some of the better quarterly ratings per show than any other segment on Raw. It escapes the logic of any IWC mark, like you and me, but the trailer park royalty out there is eating it with a rusty spoon and asking for more.
Miscarriage? Nope... just another plot twist to help keep this dead horse twitching a little longer for Vinman to hemorrhage one more dollar out of it. If WWE can pop Max Mini out from between Lita's legs with a coat hanger around his neck and a grin on his face... and avoid backlash from the FCC, then they'll do it. And it'll spike the ratings a good 0.5

Billy Gunn has seen his last moment in the sun on WWE Television

ValleyBoy: Fiction. Billy Gunn likes having a steady paycheck. You can forget about any rumblings of Billy being unhappy with not getting a sizeable push or secretly negotiating with TNA... Billy has it good right now. And that's whether he's willing to admit it or not. Despite being in midcard hell, despite being an aging wrestling, and despite being one of the least talented in-ring performers on the roster, Billy Gunn has a job for life... if he wants it. And he does. What does Billy Gunn have waiting for him outside of WWE? Not much, that's what. Hollywood? Forget about it... he's barely got the acting skills to stay on Smackdown. Indy promotions? Chicken feed compared to what he's been making for the past ten years. He'd have to work twice as hard out there in the "real" wrestling world just to keep up the paydays that he's making now. The man is nearing 40 and his wrestling mortality is catching up with him. If he keeps in Vinman's good graces, then he will certainly have a place behind the scenes along side all the other retired midcarders.

Phantom: Oh God I hope so. For people who don’t know, it looks like he’s been yanked off the active roster. A couple months ago Billy showed up at a TNA Show and somehow in his warped mind he thinks he can easily pull the kinda of money Raven does on the Indies since he’s easily as big a draw as him. But yeah, Billy is what you call a Tag Team Specialist…meaning he sucks on his own and he will never get over on his own. As it is, I’m convinced that anyone could have been given the Bad Ass gimmick back in late 97-early 98 and they could have easily went on to have the same amount of success in the role as the fifth wheel of the group. So yes this is a FACT. Billy…your days of sucking up heat are over. Take a road agent job and never come back onto my television especially with a theme song that sings the wonders of gay sex.

HEIDENRICH will be this years Nathan Jones

ValleyBoy: Fiction. Even though Nathan Jones was a Neanderthal with minimal in-ring talent and even less charisma, he left WWE because he couldn't hack the hefty work schedule and ditched them while in his native land of Australia. The key difference here is that unless WWE starts touring laboratories and artificial insemination clinics, Heidenreich isn't going to be feeling homesick enough to want to leave WWE. Heidenreich seems to have no problem with the schedule. His problem seems to be controlling his fits of self-loathing rage for constantly fucking up his matches. If WWE ever had a candidate to start picking off Funaki look-alikes from the top of a watchtower - it's Heidenreich. Nathan Jones left WWE on his own volition... Heidenreich is going to be carried out kicking, screaming, and blubbering like an eight-year old from a grocery store after being told that he can't get the Fruity Pebbles. DAMN IT, I WANTED THOSE FRUITY PEBBLES, MOTHER!!!

Phantom: Saying he’s this years Nathan Jones is being to nice to Nathan Jones. I mean Jones was just a klutz who took to much roids before he went on camera. HEIDENRICH is nothing more then just another big generic muscle-bound white guy in a long line of muscle bound generic white guys. I don’t know if it’s because Vince really sees potential in them or it has something to do with a fetish him and a few others in power in the company seem to have for BIG men…but in any event this is FICTION. HEIDENRICH has all ready set a new standard is sucking and I’m pretty sure he’s all ready got a spot waiting for him in the Wrestlecrap Hall of Shame after the Michael Cole incident.

Miss Jackie will overshadow Torrie Wilson as Smackdown's top Diva

ValleyBoy: Fact. You can see it happening already. Torrie Wilson still gets great pops from the frat boys just by stepping down the aisle, but she hasn't done anything worth mentioning since Big Show gave her car the Samsonite treatment back in the spring. Meanwhile, Miss Jackie has been shaking her ass next to Charlie Haas and Rico nearly every week. And you can notice that with each week, her stock is rising with the all-important demographic of WWE (horny teenage boys). Will Torrie get cast aside? No, of course not. As long as her tits stay above her waist then she's got a job in WWE. Miss Jackie is a new fresh face though that Vinman would love to mark his territory on. I imagine he's already envisioning the Playboy spread for next year. It's not official, but just you wait. Not even an engagement to Charlie Haas is going to slow down Jackie's rise to the top of the skank heap known as WWE Playboy alumni.

Phantom: It all depends on how much they push the team of Rico and Haas. I think it was a mistake to take the belts off them even though Rico was injured so they did have a reason. I mean if the rumors are true, Ms. Jackie sucked and fucked her way to getting that contract. Torrie on the other hand by all acounts is pretty damn wholesome. That works for her. Unless Ms. Jackie is offered a Playboy spread sometime soon (odds are she wont since Christy the new RAW Diva will get that), she’ll never jump over that hump so to speak. If anyone should be over shadowing Torrie…It should be Dawn Marie. Dawn is much hotter and she pulls off all these stupid gimmick matches a lot better then Torrie. Meh…who cares really as long as we get to see a lot of cleavage, great legs, and the occasional piece of ass. FICTION or something.

This will be TNA's PPV to mark their territory as a legitimate entity for WWE to worry about, otherwise it will put them two steps back in climbing the ladder to success

ValleyBoy: Fact. TNA are basically saying, with this Victory Road PPV, that they are every bit as deserving of monthly PPV buy-rates as WWE. Now what they need to do is deliver. Weekly PPVs are a thing of the past and Impact is now their flagship for television broadcasts. With a monthly format beginning, they need to hit hard and strong with a card that makes previous efforts look weak by comparison. If they fail to get a respectable buy-rate out of this, then they aren't only going to stall slightly... they'll flat out come to a screeching halt. Maybe I'm over-reacting to this event, but everyone should remember WWA's PPV atrocities from a couple years ago. That company wanted to make a go of it, but folded quickly after releasing a couple of the worst PPV’s in history. If TNA cannot give wrestling fans the impression that they have a good quality product, and they end up just getting some mediocre number in the buys then they can pretty much cash in their chips because they have failed with nowhere else to go.

Retro: Next to The Undertaker, The Big Boss Man had the best "career" gimmick ever devised by Vince McMahon & Company

ValleyBoy: Fact. If not him, then who? The Repoman? IRS? Duke The Dumpster? I just can't think of anyone else who comes close to having a gimmick revolving around an actual career that was as successful and as well-received as The Big Boss Man. The Undertaker is really the only other one to overshadow Boss Man's gimmick. Normally, those "working man turned wrestler" gimmicks fail horribly, but Ray Traylor had the know-how to make the character come alive. Maybe it was as simple as life experience, since he used to be a prison guard. Heck... I don't think Mark Calloway ever embalmed anyone, and I don't think Barry Darsow processed paperwork for someone's '84 Cutlass to get towed in real life. Fans connected with Boss Man like few other characters both as a face and especially as a heel. Who better than an officer of the law to despise in the ring?

Phantom: This is a FACT. Ray Trailer will forever be remembered as The Big Bossman. Sure the old school fans loved his work as Big Bubba Rogers, but in our heart of hearts he will always be The Big Bossman. He had the look and the talent to pull it off and because of that he is one of a few wrestlers who went their who career with basically the same gimmick with out numerous gimmick changes. What you saw was what you got and that’s what was best about him.

With legends like The Midnight Express reuniting, it proves that older wrestlers can still draw and a get a huge buzz

ValleyBoy: Fiction. When you look at ads for Midnight Express with Jim Cornette coming to a town near you; Hillbilly Jim, The Warlord, and The Mountie all coming together for a "Wrestling Reunion"; Nash and Hall in negotiations with TNA to reappear on our TV screens; Jerry Lawler lacing up to wrestle Kid Kash. All this proves is that older wrestlers are looking to cash in on nostalgia in any way they can. It was one thing to see Hogan back at WrestleMania, but it's quite another to look for Stan Lane or Jacques Rougeau to work some high-school gymnasium in front of a few hundred disillusioned teens and a handful of wistful grandpa's. I can't speak for anyone else, but these veterans are getting my money just because they used to be great wrestlers. Hell, Ric Flair USED to be great, but he's not getting my money either. Next thing you know, good ol' Tom Zenk is gonna drag his sorry ass out of bed to work a match with whatever "used to be" that's looking for a quick pay day.

Phantom: I think this is a huge FACT. I mean lets face it, the only real wrestling fans left are die hard fans. People like me who grew up watching in the 80’s. We had favorites back then and we still consider them favorites now. I think with The Midnight Express of Bobby Eaton and Denis Condrey reuniting after all of these years it’s proof that people want to still see them perform. Sure some wrestler’s will use their name recognition and milk it well past their prime. No one will deny that, but the fact remains they still will draw money and in the case of The Midnight Express, not only do they still have drawing power…but they also can get more buzz and interest for a one off show then the stars of today get for an entire tour.

And now the Plugs



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