Raw Report 9-20-2004
Submitted by Steven "Rommel" Schaeffer on Tuesday, September 21, 2004 at 12:34 AM EST





With no hesitation the show began with the Chairman of the Board entering to his entrance music. He referred to his announcement, and immediately called down the General Manager of Raw, who entered with a cane. Vince talked about how Chris Jericho had a novel idea for letting the fans decide recently, the idea of fan participation. He liked the idea so much; he wanted to allow WWE fans to participate by choosing everything that happened on a given night, on a Pay-Per-View no less, the matches and the types of matches. Vince says he has set aside a special night for this that he has dubbed Taboo Tuesday. Eric Bishoff thought it was a great idea on paper, but in reality the fans of Raw relied on the GM to make decisions for them. He requested that they sleep on the idea for a week and that Eric would present a better idea than Taboo Tuesday. Vince speculated that he was being patronized. To further his point against letting Bishoff come up with an idea, he said there is a reason that Eric is the General Manager of Raw and that he is not the General Manager of Nitro. He speculated also that Bishoff was really just scared that he'd lose all his powers to the fans - and at that PPV he would not be the General Manager but an active wrestler! Bishoff was frightened visually, referring to his injury (Hence the cane) and the fact that the fans would pick some monster to rip him to shreds. Vince said he took the liberty to choose his opponent for the show, another injured opponent. Eugene came out, his arm in a sling. Vince asked the fans what type of match they wanted to see between Eugene and Uncle Eric, and gave a long list of possibilities such as a slave for a week; loser wears a dress and a hair match. The fans liked all the possibilities. Eric tried to weasel his way out by sucking up to Eugene, saying how much he loves the special young man and that he could never fight with him. Eugene appeared to buy the ploy and hugged his uncle. Then, Eugene decked Bishoff and hugged Vince McMahon instead. Afterwards both men left, with Eugene imitating the infamous swagger of McMahon. The main event between Shawn Michaels and Chris Jericho was announced. A brief replay of Orton humiliating Evolution was shown.

Last week Stacy defeated Molly Holly in a dance off. Then she scored a cheap victory over Holly in a three way tag match. This week, Ms. Kiebler paired with Victoria to take on the duo of Trish Stratus and Molly. Stacy looks very good as always, that is all. Victoria started the match with Molly, and attempted a giant swing. She did not quite get all of it. Victoria wanted to tag in Stacy, but Stratus interrupted with a kick. When Stacy did the tag with Trish down, the diva attempted a near fall to no avail. Molly came into the ring but was unable to get a grip on the long legs of Stacy. I know how she feels. Stacy, why don't you return my calls? Molly was distracted with Victoria in the face corner, and for a second straight week Stacy Kiebler capitalized by rolled her up in a backslide for a surprise victory. Stacy Kiebler and Victoria defeated Women's Champion Trish Stratus and Molly Holly via pin fall. After the match, Stacy and Victoria celebrated with some very lucky male fans at ringside while the heels growled at them.

The Diva Search contestants were backstage, preparing for the big moment when one would be chosen to win a $250,000 WWE contract. Backstage, Randy Orton was reading the latest addition of Raw magazine with Triple H gripping the former champion and taunting him with the championship. Vince approached, and told Orton that sometimes life sucks. Orton swore that next time he will be the one standing over Triple H's broken body. Orton said it was destiny. Vince reminded Orton that it was the fans who would be choosing who faced the World Champion at Taboo Tuesday. Regardless, Randy promised that tonight's match would end in the sweetest letters in wrestling: R-K-O. The Superstar Billy Graham was shown to be in attendance. I hope his health has improved since his transplant surgery. A replay of Kane falling on Lita, courtesy of Gene Snitskey, was shown. The announcers had an interview with Gene Snitskey via the TitanTron. Gene denied any fault or wrong-doing last week. He said he was there to do a job and he did it. JR asked Gene if he was sorry at all for what happened, and once more Gene said it was not his fault.

At the hospital, Grisham said that Lita was fighting for her baby and that Kane consented to an interview. Before that, we had a match. Stemming from Rhyno's victory over Rosy on Heat, the Hurricane took on the Japanese Buzz saw. Another quick match ensued. Tajiri dominated the match almost entirely, hitting his swift kicks and a hurricane inverted DDT from the second rope before Hurricane hit a counter for a pin attempt. When it looked like the super hero not from Paragon had it won, Tajiri countered the pin with one of his own and landed the three-count. Tajiri defeated the Hurricane via pin fall. The Hurricane was livid after the match, and he stole the mask off the face of a young fan at ringside, who smiled through it. At the hospital, Todd Grisham interviewed Kane on the condition of Lita. Kane said that there was only a fifty-fifty chance to save the baby and seemed depressed. Todd asked about Gene Snitsky's lack of remorse and denial of guilt. Kane said that it was clearly intentional, and called Gene a dead man. The Intercontinental Title match was announced as next.

On this season premiere of Monday Night Raw a mere forty-eight minutes had passed and Shawn Michaels came out for his scheduled bout with the champion Chris Jericho. Captain Charisma, Christian, came to the announcer's booth to watch the match between the two competitors. Lock up to start, with the two fighting over an arm bar. Shawn countered the hold into a snap mare, and Jericho escaped with a scissor lock. Shawn rolled on top and Jericho rose out of it, failing to finish the back-slide pinning predicament. Chris Jericho through HBK over the ropes, but Shawn was in the process of skinning the cat. Jericho caught his legs and attempted to throw him back over, but again Shawn held on. Shawn blocked a shot to the turnbuckle while on the apron and deliver on of his own. An attempted cross body by HBK was rolled through for a near fall, and the men split. They came together again, with Jericho taking control with chops in the corner. Chris went up top with Shawn for a super-plex but was thrown off. HBK capitalized, landing the elbow from the top rope. Christian announced that he was the real show stopper, and claimed it was time to stop the show. Christian rushed the ring but was interrupted by Michaels, who threw Christian from the ring before he could land a punch. In the meanwhile, Jericho had recovered and landed a running enziguri when HBK turned his attentions back to him. The official left the ring and ejected Christian from ringside as the show went to a commercial break.

When the show returned, Shawn Michaels had recovered during the break when he used a back body drop to take Chris Jericho out of the ring. Shawn continued the momentum, tying the Intercontinental Champion's legs up in a figure four. Jericho could not turn it over before Shawn released the hold. Shawn tried to apply the stretch again, but Jericho fought out of it three times before rolling Shawn up in a small package for a near fall. The champion seized the momentum, pounding Shawn to lead into a face plant. The lionsault was dodged, and though Jericho landed on his feet his sold an injured knee. When Shawn tried a second cross body attempt Chris once more rolled through. Jericho tried the lionsault a second time, and hit it. He was too stunned from his own maneuver though, and could not get the pin in time. Lightning fast, back and forth action was to follow, with near falls and immediate counters. The crowd was really hot for it, too. Both men were down, and like all good Shawn Michaels matches HBK kipped up and tuned up some sweet chin music. Jericho countered though, locking on the Walls of Jericho in the center of the ring. Before Shawn could submit, however, Tomko hit the ring and Jericho had to release the hold to land a springboard drop kick. When he turned around, a super kick was his reward. Shawn landed far from the champion; he had to strain and crawl to the body of Chris Jericho and cover the champion. Before the official's hand could hit the matt a third time Christian broke up the pin fall. The official rang the bell, and the "Problem Solver" and "Captain Charisma" beat upon the fallen bodies of both men. Shawn Michaels and Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho wrestled to a no-contest. The Smackdown Rebound began to run, but the show suddenly cut to Todd Grisham at the hospital for an "Emergency." Todd was forced off the scene by a nurse, and Kane screamed "No!" from off camera.

La Résistance was in the ring, waiting for there opponent. Enter Maven, who squared off against Rob Conway. In an extremely short match, Maven out maneuvered Conway with counters and out paced the interference by Sylvain Grenier. Maven hit a picture perfect top rope cross body. Rob had finally taken control but was show boating far too long. Maven rolled Conway up from behind and scored a victory. Maven defeated Rob Conway via pin fall. The show cut to Todd Grisham back at the hospital, where a doctor announced that Lita had lost the baby. Kane went nuts, screaming and pounding walls. Kane wailed into the side of Lita, who stared off into space without a peep from her bed.

JR and the King wished Lita and Kane condolences, and I was celebrating the death of a pregnancy angle with noise makers and confetti. In the center of the red-carpeted ring the Coach announced that it was time to eliminate the last Diva in the $250,000 Diva Search contest. Jonathon Coachman introduced Carmella and Christy, and told them that whoever wins both made an enemy of the Coach last week in the Seattle Slugfest. Trish, being the Women's Champion came to ringside in a short skirt and high heels. It was nice to actually see her reveal her legs. Trish congratulated both women on making it this far, as it was so hard after all. Trish asked about the money, and pondered what they would do with the cash. Trish said Christy should invest in decaf and Carmella in a personality. The Coach opened the envelope, and revealed that Christy was the winner of the $250,000 Diva Search! Christy said how proud she was, and that the energy was all natural. Carmella was visibly disappointed, and congratulated Christy rather earnestly. The main event was next, between Evolution and the team of Chris Benoit, Randy Orton and Shelton Benjamin.

The competitors entered and the clock gave them nearly twenty minutes of show to fill, including a modest amount of over-run. The game was in with Benjamin, controlling the young man and killing his hope spots appropriately until Shelton hit a big back body drop. The announcers brought up how the only man who has not defeated Triple H was Randy Orton. Triple H recovered and took Shelton to his corner for a beating, but mistakenly sent him to the face corner where Chris Benoit tagged himself in. It was Benoit and Flair in the ring together, and Ric struck first. He took the rabid wolverine to the corner in a huge mistake and began to chop him. That was a mistake, as Benoit through the nature boy into the corner and chopped the living daylights out of him. He would not even let him fall before Irish whipping him and landing a back body drop on the greatest of all time. Chris called for the flying head butt, and landed it perfectly. That would have been all, but Evolution interrupted the count. All the wrestlers were in the ring at once momentarily, and then outside the ring. While there, Randy Orton attempted an RKO on Hunter but was thrown shoulder first into the ring post. Before he could fall Batista ran him over with a sick looking lariat, living him unconscious. While Shelton saw to his teammate Benoit and Flair were back at it in the ring, but ran into one another head first. Bodies were down all over the ring as the show went to break.

We can back to action suddenly, right in the middle of a Chris Benoit suplex on Triple H which allowed the hot tag to Shelton Benjamin. Shelton was a house of fire, running over the combined might over Evolution. A drop kick for the Heavyweight Champion and a pair of stinger splashes for Flair and Batista. Unfortunately for the All-American, Triple H killed the comeback with a blind-side clothesline. Of course, Evolution took turns beating on Benjamin with every dirty trick in the book as we now had a handicap match. Flair applied the figure four, and before the maneuver was countered HHH interrupted and the beating continued. Finally, Benoit got the hot tag and proceeded to knock Batista and Triple H out of the ring. A troika of German suplexes for Flair and an applied crippler cross face before a shmozz proceeded. Shelton tried to help Benoit but was too hurt from before. Benoit would then go on to suplex every member of Evolution one by one, before succumbing to the overwhelming odds. Randy Orton ran to ringside though, and tagged himself in. The fresh former-champion cleared the ring of all but Ric Flair and delivered the RKO for the victory. Chris Benoit, Randy Orton and Shelton Benjamin defeated Evolution via pin fall.

Alright, who is the man that booked this edition of Crash TV? Most weeks’ the opening segment is thirty minutes long and contains no actual news. This week, the first three segments took thirty minutes and actually had substance that could have been exploited. Everything seemed rushed tonight, from the matches to the actual dialogue. Any acting coach will tell you that slow and steady exposition, along with pauses in ones speech, builds drama and allows for impact. Attempt to read each segment of tonight's report aloud with one breath and you have the pace delivered tonight.

Mail:
Nice column. As usual. Heres a question for you. I dont know the answer, maybe you do. Why did last nights crowd chant U-S-A during the Christ Benoit-Rob Conway match? Dont people know that Conway is American and Benoit is not? Or, how about the 8 man tag last week? Rhyno, Tajiri, Regal and Benoit vs Flair, Batista, Conway and Grenier. They chanted U-S-A for that match and the faces only had 1 American on the team while the heels had 3. Not a real question and if it was I know the answer, its just a chant to rile La Resistance, but come on. Its ridiculous.

As you say, you already know the answer. I would like to think that the fans recognize that only Conway is an actual American by blood (There is such a term, it refers to the attainment of citizenship) but I am afraid that I do not. The average audience member of the WWE believes as it is told, and thusly chants "U-S-A" against any heel or team of heels that are either against the nation or in support of a face that is supposedly for the nation. Whether or not it makes sense in the context of the moment is irrelevant.

One of your best reviews so far. Loved the RPG references!!!
Cheers

Anyone who knows me in private life will attest that with the possible exception of following the news with a fine-toothed comb, I enjoy nothing better than an RPG. I am an avid Dungeons & Dragons player, and am absolute in love with video games. My current title of obsession is City of Heroes. Find me on the Virtue Server under Rikti Infused, level 39 Force Field/Dark Blast Defender.








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