|
|
|
|
|
Submitted by Pt2 on Saturday, June 5, 2004 at 7:09 AM EST
Welcome once more to the column that proudly proclaims that it was me all along Austin, Take up thy wrestling boots and walk. Back once again in a mediocre effort to entertain and enthrall, I’m Pt2, and this week, I’d like to debut a new feature of the column. At the end of the nightI was reading a thread over at the LOP forums, called “Lay down and stay down”. It basically talks about how ridiculous the finished of some matches have become, with multiple finishers being hit before finally, the opponent stays down. It’s something that rarely happened in the days of the attitude era. Any time that it did happen in the old Attitude or Next Generation era’s, there was always a pretty good reason for it, but now, it seems that the finishers just aren’t enough. In 1996, Bret Hart kicked out of the Stone Cold Stunner. Did it make sense? Yes, because Austin wasted time pulling Hart away from the ropes instead of going for the pin directly. If someone was hit with a finisher and it wasn’t the end of the match, something similar would generally happen - either the man hitting the finisher would waste time or be unable to capitalize on the move, giving his opponent time to recover, or the man who was hit with the move would by knocked outside the ring - like Yokozuna, after Lex Luger hit him with the big forearm. And remember, you can’t get the pin outside the ring. But these days they seem to have lost the “intelligent” way to use their finishing moves as spots without having them end the match. The finishing hold is, psychologically, the biggest move in the whole arsenal, and if that move can’t get the job done, then nothing else should be able to. It’s the move that the wrestler has perfected, the move they do better than anyone else, and it limits the options of the match if the opponent kicks out of it, without some kind of “back story”. I’m not saying it’s bad for it to happen once in a while. The Ultimate Warrior kicked out of Hogan's leg drop. A year later, Bret Hart kicked out of The Perfect Plex. A year later, Bret kicked out of the Bulldogs Powerslam (although that tied into the psychology of the match). When used sparingly, the whole system is fine. Hogans leg drop, despite being a weak finisher, never suffered because Warrior kicked out of it. But look at recent years - Wrestlemania XIX is a fine example. Almost everyone seemed to need three finishers before they were beat. There was no real thought gone into it. It almost seemed to be a desperate ploy to bring the dead Seattle crowd into it a little more. But it was “finisher, kick out, back to another move” for most of the match. And eventually, the move would get the job done. I don’t think this multiple kick out strategy makes the wrestler who kicks out all the time look good. Quite the opposite. If he could kick out once, and go on to win, that would give him some credibility as a wrestler. What it actually does, if he gets caught in the same move three times, is makes him look a bit dumb. Kind of like the guy who calls a hells angel fat three times, he didn’t learn from the first ass kicking. Not only that, but it hurts the credibility of the move itself - anyone remember when the Angle slam was one of the top finishers in the company? Look at it now. It pinned the Rock in 2000 with one, and now it can’t do anything unless he strings together about eight in a row. It’s strange to think about it. I hope a bit of logic comes back into the way these spots are planned. It’s almost as if they forget they are telling a story in the ring, when you look at what it can become. and now.... You be the BookerThe moment you have all been waiting for! (all two of you). If this is well received it may come up every now and again in the column. Today sees the first, and it’s a truly international affair - a battle across the pond as it were. Will the first victor hail from Fair England, or the green plains of the U.S. of A.? There’s only one way to find out Allow me to introduce today’s competitors. In the Red Corner, from Nottingham, England, he is the author of the controversial Let it Snow, he is Winter! And in the blue corner, from Pittsburgh, PA, She is the LOP TNA recapper, author of The XY Files and has interviewed Bruno Sammartino and AJ Styles, she is Tinaali! Let me take you through the structure and rules of the contest. 1. Each participant is presented with 3 challenging booking scenarios. 2. They must provide a solution to the scenario that is no more than two hundred words in length 3. Points are awarded by an impartial referee - a friend of mine, a casual wrestling fan, who will give it the “man off the street” perspective 4. Penalties are awarded for failing to answer the scenario completely, exceeding word length, and by ignoring previous storylines - unlike the current WWE writers, our bookers have to make it fit with whats already happened. Edge and Christian couldn’t turn up on the same side without an explanation, for example. And that’s basically it. The winner of each scenario is the person with the highest mark, and the overall winner is the one who wins 2 out of three. Easy, eh? So, here it is: Scenario 1 The WWE wants to implement a new rankings system based on wins and losses on the Smackdown brand. The current number one contender, Booker T, has lost too many matches to be considered number one contender. You have 8 shows and 200 words to blow off the Booker feud, set up the new system in the fans mind and create a new number one contender in time for the PPV. Winter: One the first show Booker T comes to the ring but is attacked by a masked man. The following week the general manager announces that Booker will be out of action for several weeks, and says there will be a new number one contender. John Cena and The Undertaker both have equal points, and must face off to decide who gets the title shot. They face each other the following week, but the match ends in a draw. After the match the masked man comes down again, this time with an accomplice and they both take out Cena and The Undertaker. The general manager announces that he will hand pick one of the top 5 ranking wrestlers to get the title shot. The following week the masked man comes down to the ring with his masked friend. He pulls off the mask to reveal that he is none other than general manger Kurt Angle, and his assistant is Luther. Angle names himself the number one contender. Tina: Booker and Undertaker are at the Great American Bash. Taker is about to annihilate Booker with a Tombstone but wait! Mordecai runs in. Hitting Taker with his signature move, Welcome To Hell, a shocked Undertaker loses his grip on Booker who hits the mat hard. A loud crack echoes and the PPV suddenly ends. Heyman announces that due to injury Booker is forced to retire. The only fair way to determine a new contender is implementing a rankings system. The top twelve wrestlers are randomly drawn setting up the matches- one each week until Summerslam, culminating in a no DQ Blood Battle. Six men enter the ring and are eliminated by first blood until two remain. The winner, by pinfall or submission, faces Eddie that evening. Haas, Bubba Ray, RVD, Cena, JBL and Chavo enter the ring. RVD eliminates Bubba first by tossing him into the metal stairs. JBL exposes the turnbuckle shoving Chavo’s face as blood drips from his neck. Cena attacks JBL with a European Uppercut cutting him with his ring. RVD, from behind, executes a forceful shining wizard lacerating Cena’s head. RVD goes Coast to Coast but Haas moves. Sunset flip rollup by Haas and it’s done. Judges view: Both are good ideas. I like the originality of the Blood battle, so high marks for that. Although Winter’s idea doesn’t have the same originality, it isn’t bad - I wouldn’t have a problem with seeing it. High marks all round, here I think. Pt2’s analysis: There’s a couple of points coming off here. Winter, you lose 5 points for failing to set up the rankings system. Instead of setting it up, it’s not there one minute and there the next. Tina, you seem to have forgotten that Paul Heyman isn’t the Smackdown GM anymore. It’s now Kurt Angle. It’s only a little thing, but hey, rules are rules. Minus 2 for a storyline error. Final Scores: Winter: 82% Tinaali: 94% So Tina moves 1-0 up in the best of 3 series, and Pittsburgh rejoices. They haven‘t seen scenes like this since the Steelers won the Superbowl. Lets move onto the second scenario.... Scenario 2 Eddie Guerrero has defected to NWA-TNA and rubbished the WWE title, two weeks prior to Summerslam, leading to a huge rise in the TNA ratings. WWE needs a strong Summerslam to prevent another all out wrestling ratings war. Vince demands results. With the undertaker as only a part time wrestler, you must re-establish the credibility of the WWE title before Summerslam and create a main event using only the mid-carders available to the current Smackdown roster. Winter: John Cena comes to the ring and does a rap trashing Eddie Guerrero and NWA-TNA. He says that Eddie was never 'street' and was a faker all along. Booker T comes out and agrees that Eddie was never 'real', but says that neither is Cena. The two get into a confrontation which is broken up by Rey and RVD. Angle comes out says that their will be an elimination tag match later in the show, with Booker and Rey teaming to face RVD and Cena, and the last two men in the ring will face each other at SummerSlam for the title. In the match RVD is first out being pinned by Rey. An exhuasted Rey goes to tag Booker, but Booker refuses, hoping that Cena will pin the weakened Rey, meaning it would be Cena v Booker at SummerSlam. After 15 minutes of being beat down Rey finally gives up, meaning Cena and Booker will face each other for the title. The next week GM Angle names Rey the guest referee for the match at SummerSlam, which leaves both Cena and Booker panicking, as they are now both enemies of Rey, leaving an unpredictable main event for SummerSlam. Tina: Heat has been advertised as a once in a lifetime event. We start out with Vince on the mic. “Eddie has done a terrible deed. He’s brought great shame to his familia by his actions. I’m going to right this wrong…tonight! Immediately effective, the cruiserweight and heavyweight belts are gone. There will only be one. The Ultimate Survivor championship belt!! It’s your continued loyalty that made this business and now it’s time to give back to you. No longer will I decide what you want. In honor of our men and women fighting for democracy, I’m going to do this the American way… by a vote.” He then directs us to vote at www.wwe.com or for those without internet, 1-800-993-7897 but only until the end of the show. The top ten wrestlers are booked for a Survivor Series next Thursday. The winner becomes the Ultimate Survivor Champ. Vince ends the show by saying, “ For all of you who doubted me when I said I was going to make some shocking changes around here, well I hope that tonight I restored your faith in the WWE product. Thanks for your loyalty through the years and… God Bless America! judge’s view: Not a bad idea from Tina here, but I think Winter definitely takes this one. I think his does the better job of setting up a great main event that I’d want to see, and makes me care less about Eddie’s defection - which makes me want to stick with the WWE. Pt2’s analysis: No penalties here. Judge’s scores will stand. Final Scores: Winter: 88% Tinaali: 70% So, Winter ties the score, and I’m sure somewhere distant I can hear “Rule Britannia” ringing out. Whether I can hear it or not, we’re at one each going into the final scenario. Will the first victory go to the Englishman or the American lady? Like any real bastard, I’ve kept the hardest one for last. But did you expect anything less? scenario 3 Your promotion has only 12 wrestlers active, and the owner demands on having a 16 man tag team tournament. The "eccentric" Owner insists on their being little repetition in the matches, and your job as booker is on the line. You must complete the tournament using only twelve wrestlers, and never using the same situation twice. Winter: First round matches: Eddie Guerrero defeats Chavo Guerrero Jr, The Undertaker defeats Charlie Haas in a casket match, Rey Mysterio defeats RVD in a hardcore match, Cena wins a match when his opponent no shows, Bubba Dudley defeats Bradshaw in a flag match, Booker T takes out his opponent backstage and wins by forfeit, Mordecai defeats Rene Dupree in a street fight and both men in the final match and destroyed by Eddie, Rey and Cena before the match even starts, eliminating them both. Eddie defeats The Undertaker in a 'grab the urn' match, Cena defeats Rey by DQ when he turns heel and levels Rey with a chair, Booker defeats Bubba Ray when Heyman accidentally nails Bubba with the ring bell and Mordecai gets a bye. Eddie defeats Cena in a 30 minute Iron Man match by 3 falls to 2, and Booker defeats Mordecai in a 'ghetto street fight' with help from The Undertaker. On PPV Booker defeats Eddie in the finals in a first blood match to win the tournament. Tina: Round One Match #1 AJ Styles & Christopher Daniels vs. Low ki & Elix Skipper Winner: Styles & Daniels Match #2 Eric Young & Bobby Roode vs. Rey Mysterio & Tajiri Winner: Mysterio & Tajiri Match #3 RVD & Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman & Paul London Winner: Kidman & London Match #4 Elix Skipper & Eric Young vs. RVD & Mysterio Winner: Skipper & Young Round 2 Match #5 AJ Styles & Christopher Daniels vs. Rey Mysterio & Tajiri Winner: Mysterio & Tajiri Match #6 Billy Kidman & Paul London vs. Elix Skipper & Eric Young Winner: Kidman & London Round 3 Match # 7 Rey Mysterio & Tajiri vs. Billy Kidman & Paul London Winner: Mysterio & Tajiri Judge’s view: This wasn’t answered as well as the first two, but a good effort considering how tough this one could be. I like the sound of Winter’s tournament, but he doesn’t actually make any reference to it being a tag tournament in there. So even though I’ve only heard of half the guys in Tina’s, she gets the nod. Pt2’s analysis: Yeah, this one was pretty tough. Just the one penalty here. For leaving out any mention of it being a tag tournament, Winter loses 5 pts. Which means that the final score for this round is: Winter: 58% Tinaali: 70% And Tinaali takes the first contest 2-1! I’d like to thank Winter and Tinaali for taking part in my little experiment today. If you’d like to get in touch with either of them, you can contact Winter by clicking here, and get in touch with Tina by clicking here. And that’s it from me this week. Take up thy wrestling boots and walk will be back in it’s usual form next week. All Feedback is appreciated, whether it is about the finishers article or the Booking contest, and I will reply to all mails received. If you have any opinions or suggestions on the new segment, I would love to hear them. You can send them and other feedback to me by clicking here. Until next week, Take up thy wrestling boots and walk. Pt2. *NEW GALLERY* An XTREME Catfight with Sunny, Payton Banks and ROH's Lacey! WOW!
[Back to LOP] [News Archives] [Results] [Columns] [Forums]
|
|