WWE Raw Results 5-24-2004
Submitted by Steven "Rommel" Schaeffer on Monday, May 24, 2004 at 11:03 PM EST



Steven “Rommel” Schaeffer can be reached via E-Mail and at AIM screen name “Winged Mystery.” So I was down on Fisher Island over the weekend, soaking up some sun and swimming off a few vanity pounds. My father has been taking lessons from Ernie Els’ trainer, and he has been nagging me to be his partner. So we went out for a round and I had my very first par on a true course on Saturday. Who’s better than me right now? Quite a few people I admit, but I still rule! Oh yeah, it is plug-riffic! Ridin’ with the Bossman, because I have more hits than people far more talented than me.

Last week on Raw, the interview package details, Shawn Michaels screwed Triple H and gave Kane the number one contender ship for the World Heavyweight Championship at Badd Blood. This week, Hunter complains in the locker room about HBK. They agree on reinstating HBK for a match between the two at Badd Blood, though HHH promises that Shawn will not even make it there after tonight. Hunter then complains that Evolution was not there for him. He demands unity for Flair’s match with Edge, but keeps Batista with him just in case Michaels shows up. Before the match, Edge’s continuing rivalry with Evolution is briefly shown. Flair entered to strut immediately in the face of the Tag Champion, and not getting paid back for it either. Edge used his power to overwhelm Flair, but auspicious interference by Orton and a thumb to the eye by Flair turned the match out of his favor. Three Ultimate Warrior clotheslines, however, would temporarily take the veteran off his game plan. He tried to regain momentum by going to the top rope for… whatever it is he is going for when he goes up there, and was speared mid air for a two count. Edge himself went to the top but was given a stun gun on the top and was almost pinned himself. Shelton Benjamin ran down to attack Randy Orton, and Edge was able to nail a clean spear in the middle of the ring for a pin fall. Edge defeated Ric Flair. Backstage, Batista kicked a crew member off a chair, and Triple H sat down.

Vince McMahon gave a taped segment, surrounded by beautiful women, to announce the quarter million dollar Raw Diva search. WCW did that towards the end too. Todd Grisham tried to interview Lita over the question she answered last week. Matt Hardy interrupted, and he and his dame had some private time concerning how hard he looked for her all week. She tells him that she realized during the week they she loved him. They kiss sweetly, and then she promises to show him how much. She steps into her locker room, and finds Kane waiting. Heavy breathing and she begs that it is all supposed to be over. He appears, stroking her all the while. She is allowed to leave the locker room, and she walks off with Matt v. 1. Apparently the WWE writers have been hanging in various parts of Rhy’din lately.

Triple H and Batista pulled a man who that thought was Shawn Michaels from his car and beat him in a Dustin Rhodes fashion. Unfortunately, it turned out to be Stevie Richards in street clothes. Batista went to go check on Flair and Orton and Hunter continued the beating for the hell of it. The Frenchman took on the Super heroes. I saw someone playing a very convincing Hurricane Helms in City of Heroes, proving his popularity to me. Alas, the WWE does not play online games. La Résistance used some surprising tandem offense on the cruiserweight, and the announcers pondered whether the team was really beginning to gel. They worked on his knee, slowing him down enough that after Rosie helped enough to set up the Shinning Wizard, he was unable to connect. A cheap roll up ended this match, if you can believe it. La Résistance defeated Hurricane and Rosey. Outside, in the street, Triple H paced back and forth. When his back was turned, Shawn jumped him. They brawled for a few moments before referees, who were outside the building for reasons unknown, pulled them apart.

In the ring, Jericho was ready for his Highlight Reel. He talks about injuring the CLB, or Crushed Lower Back, of Christian in their brutal Steel Cage match two weeks ago. Then he introduces his guest, the Intercontinental Champion Randy Orton. Jericho strokes the young man’s ego, and I realize that no one ever sits in his chairs. It all ends when Shelton Benjamin is brought up, including Orton turning his challenge down. Of course, Jericho begins to taunt the “Living Legend,” calling him a coward and an ass-clown. Orton tells him to watch his mouth, or else the first ever undisputed champion is going on the killed legends list. He slaps Chris, and eats a perfect enziguri for his trouble. Batista runs down to turn the tide, but Shelton Benjamin runs down to even the odds. Eric Bishoff hits the stage, announcing again to refuse to lose control of his show. He makes a match between the four to ensue immediately.

We join the match already in progress, with Jericho firmly in control of Randy Orton. He nails a surfboard, and the All-American wants the tag. He gets it, but Orton wants none of this type of people. I feel dirty just typing that. Batista comes in, and Benjamin attempts to work the arm. Batista keeps his vertical position though, and manages to keep his arm bent during attempted submissions. He powers out repeatively, dazing Benjamin in the progress. Orton comes in to attack the weakened Shelton briefly, and quickly tags Batista back in who continues the punishment. Shelton counters into a hangman’s noose neck breaker, and gets the tag. Jericho is on fire, taking both members of Evolution out. He misses the lionsault of course, but locks on the walls. When Batista attempts to break it up he dodges and tosses the big man from the ring. Orton goes next, and Jericho hits a pescado on both men. Benjamin comes in shortly after, and is firmly in control of the match.

We return and Jericho is in a bad way in the corner. Evolution works him over, and Trish joins the announcers. A replay shows that Trish’s arrival distracted Jericho to kill his momentum. In the ring, Randy Orton uses a step-over toe hold with drops on Jericho’s arm. That is very impressive progress from the young man, showing why he is getting so much heat from the crowd and so much love from the front office. Batista comes in to wrench the limb around the ropes while the comely Trish watches on and promises to reveal why she is out here. Jericho attempts to fight out, but a short arm scissors is quickly applied from Randy. Orton hits an arm bar take down, one of my favorites. Jericho nails a drop kick while in another arm bar, and makes the hot tag to Benjamin. Speed takes Batista down, getting a pair of quick two counts, Batista power slams into a near count of his own – and Jericho comes in for the slobber knocker. All participants are all over, with Jericho sending Batista flying outside. Randy tries the RKO, but is pushed into Shelton’s modified suplex for a three count. Chris Jericho and Shelton Benjamin defeated Evolution. That was an absolutely fantastic match ripe with psychology.. When Jericho is leaving Trish calls him over to the announcer booth, and Tomko attacks from behind. He tosses Jericho into the stage, and then power bombs him through the announcer table. Trish taunts over the fallen super star. In porn there are no actors, only stars. In wrestling there are no stars, only super stars. Seems like the further you go down into the dregs of social acceptance the more prominent the titles.

A replay of the carnage is shown, leading into Kane’s appearance. Kane announces that he is envious that Benoit is the champion, lives a normal life and is living his dream. Kane talks about his life, which is a nightmare. I too saw the Katie Vick angle, so I concur. Kane wants Benoit’s World Title, and he always gets what he wants. In Bishoff’s office HBK makes sure he has his match at Badd Blood. Triple H attacks him from behind, and the two brawl into the Japanese screens that make up the set. Officials, hanging out in the General Managers office off screen for some reason, pull the two apart while Eric yells.

Victoria has a new hip hop entrance theme, complete with some air humping at the stage top. I know quite a few writers on LOP who were very happy for that. She takes on Molly, wearing a brown wig this week. Gail Kim accompanies the former Women’s Champion, and she quickly gets involved in the match up. Molly is on top of Victoria the whole match up, and the porn references continue. Victoria begins a come back, testing some new “Face” offense to play to the crowd. Gail distracts her, but cannot prevent the Widow’s Peak and the victory. Victoria defeated Molly Holly. After the pin fall, Gail Kim attacked – and ate a Widow’s Peak of her own! On the Smackdown! Rebound! Rey Rey (Yes, that is one of his nicknames.) and Eddie Guerrero teamed to face the Dudley Boyz. Eddie would pass out, obviously still reeling from the loss of blood suffered at the hands of JBL. In Bishoff’s office, Johnny Nitro held his head (He was knocked aside during the brawl) while Bishoff yelled about the blatant disrespect he suffered. He has his apprentice gather every man in the company.

In Bishoff’s office, the gather roster of Raw was asked to pull Hunter and Shawn apart to regain their show. Benoit was there, embarrassingly playing second fiddle to another story line, standing next to some one I have never seen before. Bishoff threatened to fire the entire roster if they did not help him. A replay of the Rock and Eugene segment was shown, and Grisham got an interview with him. Eugene of course fooled around, before delivering a certain someone’s change phrase. Grisham announces his match tonight, and Regal is excited to be tagging up with him. Johnny Nitro announces that Regal is not reinstated, so he cannot go out with him. William tries to stand up for the special young man, but is shot down. It would seem Eugene needs to find a tag partner or face a handicap match. Regal gives him a pep talk, the retarded wrestler journey’s off.

Garrison Cade and Jonathon Coachman took on Eugene, all by his lonesome. Or was he?! The World Heavyweight Champion, the World Tag Champion – Chris Benoit! Coach attacked Eugene before the match started, but it was a tale of jobbers with the Champion. Dynamite Kid take downs and suplexes led for the very over Eugene to work over Cade. He ducked a right from the apron by Coach and knocked him off the ring. A criss-cross spot! Eugene tricked Cade into stopping, looking up and then hit him with a Chief Jay Strongbow chop. The crowd loves it. Benoit was in and gave Cade a little office, long enough for Coach to come in and get crushed. Eugene came in for the air plane spin to take Cade outside, and Benoit took Coach for a triple suplex ride. He called for the head butt, and knocked Coach clean out. The crowd wanted Eugene, and Benoit tagged him in. Before he could get in, Chris Benoit led him to the top rope. Eugene hit a head butt of his own, and got the pin! Chris Benoit and Eugene defeated Cade and Coachman. Triple H was talking to Evolution when HBK attacked in time for another pull apart. You know, Nintendo’s booth at E3 was less redundant.

Hunter came to the ring to call out HBK. He answered that challenge, and the two brawled in the center of the ring. Michaels had the better of the situation, A super kick to Flair and fists to Orton and Batista kept him there until Edge and Benoit pulled Evolution away. HBK continued to pound Triple H, but then the rest of the Raw locker room came for the Monday Nitro finish to the show. Albert and that guy I never saw before were a part of the giant brawl. Shawn hit a pescado until finally the twenty or so men subdued them. Bishoff announced that this was enough. At Badd Blood, it would be Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels… Hell in a Cell.








9/3: HUGE Update on The Undertaker's WM Streak! Which WWE RAW STAR Is Going To End It, Storyline, TONS MORE!! Read Now!

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