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Submitted by Pt2 on Saturday, April 3, 2004 at 11:48 AM EST
Welcome to the main page debut of the only column that gets more pops for Paul don't live here no moreIn an attempt to keep Kurt Angle active all though he can barely wrestle anymore, the WWE have shifted things around on the Smackdown brand. Paul Heyman resigns as the general manager of Smackdown when he is drafted by RAW, and Kurt Angle gets appointed to take over his position. At first I was dubious about Heyman leaving the job. After all, you can't deny he did a great job (all right, you can, but that doesn't mean I have to agree with you). But the more I think about it, the less I dislike the idea. Angle is one of the most over heels in the company right now. The booking in the past few weeks has shown Paul Heyman lose control over the Smackdown locker room. Who better to appoint than Kurt Angle to sort it out? If anyone can win back the massive advantage that you get if the Big Show is your henchman, it's the man who has been one of the most charismatic and high profile main event wrestling stars since the summer of 2000. If anyone can quell the locker room revolt (or at least an on air one), it's Kurt Angle, the multi time WWE champion and a man who holds a victory against... well, everybody at some point. Even the Undertaker. And that man doesn't lose that often. Ask Kane. It also gives a new dimension to the show. Kurt, to my knowledge has never acknowledged to the mass audience that he is done with wrestling. Unlike when Steve Austin became co-GM of RAW , when it was announced to the world that he wasn't medically cleared to wrestle, Kurt can be shown as a man who just accepted the job to try his hand at something new. Unlike Austin, who was the hurt man destroying the healthy future talent, he doesn't have to be shown as the man who does it because he can't do anything else without snapping that brittle neck of his. And with him now cleared to work in the ring occasionally, if any of the stars get out of line, he could get into the ring with them and make them fall into line without denting their credibility. Austin, as big a name as he was, was injured when he attacked people and should not have been shown to be stronger than healthy talent. Angle doesn't have that to deal with. After all, there is no shame in losing to an Olympic gold medallist who has been near the WWE title through practically all their pro wrestling career now, is there? That seems like a plausible enough reason for Angle to become GM to me. I'll be honest, my initial hesitance had nothing to do with them acquiring Angle as General manager, it was more to do with them losing Paul E. The man who made Smackdown respectable again after the Stephanie and Vince fiasco. Yeah, I'll confess that losing Heyman didn't seem like the best move at first. And I'll also admit that when I found out that it wasn't Stephanie taking his place, I felt a lot better. I don't usually mock the afflicted, but that feud with Vince was pretty damn retarded. But the absence of Paul as GM was still worrying me. Since he took over as GM, the quality of the show had improved and stayed at a very high level. But then, my friends, I had an epiphany. As William Shakespeare once said on the subject, "Woe was me, until I realised that this certainly is his impending return to management". Imagine if Paul was to take over the management of some of the weaker heels on Smackdown. Yes, I know I'm supposed to oppose the weaker heels doing ANYTHING and throwing the stronger names forward, but while they have a job they might as well do something to entertain us. Imagine how the Bashams Brothers could do if they had a decent mouthpiece, for example. They have come on as a tag team in ring, and look at Paul's record so far. Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin came in with Paul Heyman and WWE Champion Kurt Angle in their corner, virtually as no-bodies in the pro-wrestling major leagues, and look at them now. Shelton was probably one of the biggest names in the draft (behind Hunter and Edge), and everyone is looking at how he and Charlie will do apart on the different shows. Brock Lesnar could never really have had the same impact without Paul guiding him and speaking for him in the first few months, so what's stopping Sean O'Haire doing the same thing with Heyman there? . Alternatively, you have Akio and Sakoda, a tag team who have now lost their front man in Tajiri. A ride with the very recognizable and over Paul Heyman could do a lot for those two gentlemen. Matt Morgan as a Batista style Muscle man/enforcer, the number of people Heyman can work with is nearly endless. It's also got an in-built storyline there. What happened the last time we saw Paul Heyman on Smackdown? He was punishing people for their turning on him a week earlier. If Paul was to represent a star just drafted from RAW (say Mark Jindrak, for example, although he looks to be Teddy Longs new man) and use him to get back at some of the stars who turned their backs on him, it could make for some interesting television, and could lead to a high profile feud with whichever dashing young Smackdown face is selected to stop him. All right, it doesn't sound like much now, but I'm no WWE writer. The basic principle is there, and it is staring them in the face. Throughout his entire reign he was shown to be a bitter man not averse to taking revenge on people when he saw fit, and since he arrived he has been shown as the genius, who could come up with the plots that his henchmen could carry out. What's stopping him using those plots to advance the career of his new protege? Its well known that to succeed in the WWE, you need a number of things, and one of the most important ingredients is a certain level of competence on the microphone. When you look at the number of people on Smackdown who just flat up shouldn't be allowed near a microphone, Paul Heyman is the answer to their prayers. And as I look down the list of Smackdown stars, that is one hell of a lot of prayers to be answered. The WWE consider him to be one of the greatest of all time, and with good reason. I'd put the man up there with the very best. I'll still take Bobby Heenan out of them all, but Heyman is there with some very prestigious names. He's done a lot for Brock Lesnar in his short run as his manager. Truth be told, I found it really hard to give a shit about Lesnar when he didn't have Paul with him. Oh, stop shouting Blasphemy, he's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy. Whether he takes over managing Mark Jindrak, Sean O'Haire, Matt Morgan, The Full Blooded Italians, Akio and Sakoda.... the list goes on. Paul can benefit them all, in one way or another. Just by acting as a mouthpiece for them, he can get them some TV time, and that can do wonders in the making of a star. If the rumours concerning his linking up with Bradshaw are true, then he might make that little run a bit more tolerable. Bradshaw can talk, but for gods sake, talk about a channel changer. I've seen his as Justin "Hawk" Bradshaw, Blackjack Bradshaw the heel, Blackjack Bradshaw the face, Blackjack Bradshaw against Barry Windham, Bradshaw with the Ministry of Darkness, Bradshaw with the APA, and now this John Leyfield Bradshaw or whatever the hell his name is. I think I might have given a shit through all that time for a grand total of about 8 minutes. 8 minutes in as many years is not a great record. Paul could at least make him slightly interesting in his short (that's just a fervent prayer) run at the top. Paul Heyman's logic is the one responsible for his heel turn after all. It was Paul Heyman who said he spoke highly of Bradshaw, and Paul Heyman's logic that told Bradshaw he had to think of his own career before his friend. It would make sense, at the very least, for this "new" Bradshaw to acquire the help of a man who makes sense to him and thinks highly of him now, wouldn't it? President Vince?No, I'm not suggesting that in 2008 Vince will be Jesse Ventura's wrestler in the White House. I'm not that perverted, and I'm sure that's an image we don't need. Although it would be interesting to see his campaign trail. Vince and his unique brand of "Political entertainment". Can you imagine the backlash if he had Kane tombstone Hilary Clinton? But I digress. And besides, Kane will probably be out of a job by 2008. Vince has played the "evil owner" of the WWE for the past six years, since his feud with Steve Austin began prior to Wrestlemania. Yes, that feud. You could even say that the seeds were sewn at the tail end of 1997 for the Mr. McMahon character, as opposed to the friendly, commentating Vince that we saw before that. The Vince McMahon of the " BAAAACK Body drop!" and other gems of The Next Generation, which now looks like a hall of fame. For any fans that don't remember the WWF before the "attitude" era, on air there was a figure head president who was seen as the authority figure in the company. Much like the commissioner, while they were seen to be powerful on air, they had no actual power in the company. But they were generally fan friendly, and while they occasionally made unpopular decisions (like stripping Shawn Michaels of the Intercontinental title in October 1995), made the matches that the fans wanted to see and upset the heels for the most part. In short, they were the complete opposite of what the Mr. McMahon character was. You kinda liked them, in their own way. I still remember the huge pop when the late, great Gorilla Monsoon started chopping Big Vader in 1996. Right up until Vader beat the man out of the company for two months. That brought us Roddy Piper as president and the overtime Iron man match and Goldust in Ladies under-wear. Yes, Vader does have a lot to be responsible for. Vince has been shown rather differently in the past few weeks. With a few brief exceptions, he has spent the past 6 years as a heel. But in the build up to Wrestlemania XX, he was shown as the face in a little spat with the former president of WCW, Eric Bischoff (and lets be fair, Bischoff will always be the heel). Although it appeared he was going to make an unpopular decision by not giving the fans Lesnar vs. Goldberg, he set it up in a very official way. He set it up as being too volatile for a WWE ring, not just using "the fans want to see it, so I won't give it to them" tack that he used throughout his Mr. McMahon run. And at Wrestlemania, where it all begins again, he appeared to the crowd as Vincent McMahon, not as Mr McMahon and thanked them all for helping to create the legacy that is Wrestlemania. Not a very heelish thing to do, but I decided to ignore it for the time being. After all, it was Wrestlemania XX, A special occasion. Better to wait and see. But with the way Vince announced the lottery, I am becoming more and more convinced that for the time being at least, we will see Vince play the role more even-handedly. I don't think he will show the huge heel partiality that he has for the past few years. While he may remain a heel himself - you don't shed off the heat he has had for the past few years without a complete turn - but I think it will be interesting to have the man in overall control as a fair (or fairer) boss, at least until he gets bored or the ratings go down a bit and he panics. That seems to happen from time to time. And on the real plus side, we have someone who can actually TALK into a microphone without sending me to sleep every time they turn up - with Vince turning up as the fair guy, it will put a limit on Linda McMonotone's time on TV. And that's not a bad thing. That's a GOOD thing. Shelton the SuperstarThe worlds greatest tag team got split in the draft, and you know what that means folks? Singles competition. And this past week on RAW, Shelton Benjamin picked up a big win on his RAW debut against probably the biggest heel name in the business right now, Triple H. Now, I'm not going to suggest that this means Shelton will be thrust straight into the main event of RAW just yet. I'm not naive enough and have seen enough youngsters get big wins to know that it takes more than one win to make a star. The 1-2-3 Kid never held the world title, and for that I am truly thankful. But I will say that Hunter doesn't lose that often to someone as un-established in singles competition, and this is a good omen for Shelton. The WWE are supposedly very high on the young man, and he could be a very bright future prospect. With his partner Charlie Haas, the man was one of the better performers on Smackdown throughout 2003, which really is impressive considering it was his first full year in the big league. Not many others who have a debut year that impressive. All right, don't point out Angle to me. Or Lesnar. I know about them, and they are exceptions to the rule. The man seems to have the natural charisma that the WWE likes, and he is a product of the WWE's own developmental system, which some people consider to be the green light for a push. There really doesn't seem to be anything holding Shelton back right now except one thing. The number of Faces on RAW. With Chris Benoit as a face world champion (although rumour has it only in the short term), Shawn Michaels as a face, Chris Jericho recently turned face, Edge returning on RAW... all established names who will all be ahead of the youngster in the queue for the top spot, the chances of Shelton becoming a genuine main eventer this soon after arriving on RAW are slim. The odds are that Hunter will pull back a victory in the coming weeks over Shelton, but this win over "the" Raw main eventer will put him towards the top of the card straight away. People will remember that Shelton beat The Game on his RAW debut, and look at him as at the very least a future star. Who knows, once the high profile program with Foley is out of the way, you may be watching Shelton vs. Orton for the Intercontinental title. And with what will probably be the deciding bout coming at Backlash, it could be very soon that Shelton Benjamin claims his first Intercontinental title reign. I think I'd like to see that. Due to what can be called something approaching popular demand (in that someone asked me to do it) it's the return of the TUTWBAW awards. It's not complicated really. It's just two people from the past week; One who has impressed gets told to Take up thy wrestling boots, and one who has been.... less impressive (I'll be nice about it. For now.) gets told to walk. Take up thy wrestling boots, Booker T. Booker T was the biggest name RAW gave up in order to regain Triple H, and out of the three definitely the one who will have the most impact on Smackdown. Unless the Dudleys change their act, of course. And since appearing on Smackdown, Booker T has turned Heel. Although Bradshaw will likely be the first one in line, I think Booker T has got a great thing going here. It's a believable heel turn. The man has wrestled on RAW for a long time. RAW is the older show, and is the show that beat Nitro. It's genuinely possible that the Book could consider RAW the better show. And that's why the Smackdown fans will hate him. He called their beloved show "Minor League". With some big wins in the coming weeks to gain momentum, he can keep referring to the Smackdown stars as not in his league, Book will stay in the public eye and be the obvious choice to take over for when Bradshaw gets pushed to the back burner. Then, we could see a feud. Eddie Guerrero meets Booker T for the World title at Summerslam? Could be something there, with the proper planning. Lets just hope that the Undertaker doesn't completely ruin that. ..... and walk. The walk award this week goes to the flight attendants that are suing WWE stars in Maricopa county, for sexual harassment during the so-called "flight from hell". Now, I know sexual harassment is a serious issue, and if they were harassed by the wrestlers then they have every right to sue them. That I don't have any problem with at all. What earns them this award has to be that they accuse "nature boy" Ric Flair of wandering around the plane, wearing only a jewelled cape. Now, as funny as I found this idea at first, of the 16 time world champion running around doing his stylin' and profilin' routine wearing only his cape of doom, on reflection, that is a mental image I don't need. Really don't need. So for giving me that rather frightening image (Woo!), they take the cake this week. Anyway, that'll do it for this week. Hope you liked this one. Before I go, there is just time for me to give props to some great writers. Check out the latest work by Tinaali, Xanman, SteJ, The Standard, WnWmickeydragon420, Double Helix, Robb, Lonewolf, read them all at The LOP Columns forum! And don't forget to check out this month's Column of the month - AdamG talks SEX, coming soon to the main page! All feedback is appreciated, please feel free to send it to me here. Tell me what you liked, tell you what you didn't like, or give me recipes for apple pie. Whatever you want, and I'll get back to you. Especially with the pie. Have a great week, Pt2. *NEW GALLERY* AMAZING Recent Pix of Candice Michelle Soaking Herself for Diggnation! WOW!
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