Wrestlemania XX Results 3-14-04
Submitted by Steven "Rommel" Schaeffer on Monday, March 15, 2004 at 9:04 PM EST



Singing the National Anthem, which is apparently America the beautiful, the world famous Harlem Boy’s Choir - complete with patriotic video package and confetti. A Wrestlemania video package started the show, formerly. The announcers introduced to the show in Raw and Smackdown! English and Spanish. A quick note: The set was excellent, featuring an excellent light set up in the shape of the NY Skyline that morphed as necessary for every entrance.

US Title Match: John Cena versus The Big Show©
Cena, wearing a Patrick Ewing jersey, welcomed the crowd right with a rap complete with New York and penis references. I haven’t watched Smackdown! lately, when did they change the US title mold? The match started with The Big Show overpowering the smaller Cena, with the announcers talking about Show’s history at the Garden, which they claim includes retiring Hulk Hogan. The Big Show really took it to Cena, using his weight and strength to pound the challenger. All the submission holds were kept animated thanks to some good selling by Cena, so the crowd kept in the match. Cena had a few come backs, but was quickly squashed by the Giant. Finally, the master of Thuganomics had a spur of action which included a drop kick to the knees to send Big Show face first into the top turnbuckle. He hit the F-U, which the crowd went wild for, but the Giant kicked out. Cena was in shock, a loss for what to do next, so he grabbed the chain. The ref argued with him as the crowd popped huge, especially when Cena told the official “You can’t see me!” Finally, Cena tossed his chain across the ring. When the official went to clear it, Cena grabbed his full-fist rings and used them as knucks. Another F-U, and John Cena is the new United States champion! ***

Backstage, Jonathon Coachman waltzed around backstage to greet the FBI and Theodore Long. He went into Bishoff’s office, and was given a mission to find the Undertaker to scoop Smackdown! The Coach was hesitant, but agreed. The Intercontinental Champion Randy Orton, with Evolution, gave an excellent previously recorded promo from the stairwell he threw Mick Foley down with video from their feud.

Sudden Death Fatal Four way Raw Tag Titles Match: La Résistance versus Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrack versus Booker T and Rob Van Dam
Four teams, eight men, quick tags and total chaos! Well, it was chaos at first anyway. Rob Conway slowed the match down, stretching Booker T’s back for a while before Booker got to his feet and reversed into a Spine buster. Van Dam came in on fire, and took out nearly everyone single-handedly with a variety of kicks. Say, why they don’t make Garrison Cade and Mark Jindrack either “The New Strike Force” or “Strike Force II?” Rob went for the 5*, only to be pushed to the outside. The match then quickly deteriorated, with all participants coming into the ring in rapid succession. Booker T hit his axe kick on Rob Conway, and off the ropes came Van Dam for the win. **

Backstage, the Coach looked for the Undertaker. What he found instead was Mean Gene Oakerland and a well thin and raspy Bobby the Brain Heenan having sex with Moolah and Mae Young in a utility closest. A video package for the Jericho, Christian and Trish love triangle feud is shown. Hey guys, it’s not the OC! Actually, maybe I should say Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, as the package caused me to notice Jericho does the so cliché half tuck.

Christian versus Chris Jericho
Right off the bat the two Canadian Blonds fought a high impact, vicious match. Jericho seemed as intent with beating Christian as he did with hurting him. Early on, Chris back body dropped Christian over the top rope, and then delivered a springboard cross body. Christian regained the upper hand back in the ring though, using a belly to back suplex to toss Jericho outside head over heels. The two began battling back and forth, trading impressive spinning heel kicks, enziguris, Northern lights suplexes and even a tornado scorpion death driver. Christian went up top and Jericho ran the ropes to try a superplex. Christian reversed it into a flap jack, and went for a cross body – which Jericho rolled through. Christian locked on the Texas Clover Leaf, which Jericho rolled through and locked on the Walls. Christian got the ropes, so Jericho took him outside and locked the Walls on there. Jericho, after a failed attempt, landed a double underhook suplex from the top rope and began selling his knee. Trish ran down to ringside as Christian took control. He landed a perfect jumping DDT for only a two, and saw Trish. He pulled her into the ring and began attacking her, so Jericho could clothesline him out of the ring. When Chris went to check up on his pet Diva she thought he was Christian and elbowed him in the face. This gave Christian enough to run into the ring, roll Jericho up, and score the quick pin fall. ***

After the match, Trish went to her man to beg forgiveness. Christian ran to the ropes, and Jericho made to go after him. Trish grabbed him by the arm, however, and began smacking him. Christian then hit the unprettier, and the pair celebrated together over the fallen Y2J. They walked away together, and necked on top of the stage while Jericho spat curses at them both. A Monday Night War DVD commercial was shown. Backstage, Lillian Garcia interviewed Mick Foley in preparation for his first match in four years. The Rock burst in as Mick talked about restraining his emotion. He told Foley that everyone, including the Hamburglar and Grimace (Hurricane and Rosey) and Jimmy Snucka with Don Muraco, knows that tonight is Mick Foley’s night.

Evolution’s Batista, Ric Flair and Randy Orton © versus The Rock and Sock Connection
I miss the “Hollywood Rock” entrance greatly. The faces ran in together and cleared the ring, before Flair and Rock squared off. Rock back body dropped the Nature Boy while outside and Foley jumped him out of no where. Bang bang! Orton got the tag, and so came in Foley. He placed the Intercontinental Champion in the Tree of Woe and dropped a running elbow onto Orton’s face. Rock came in and took him out of the turnbuckles with a blow and to the “Lower abdomen.” Batista pulled the rope down under a running Rock, and dropped him head first on the barricade. Flair took Rocky to the corner, and the movie star sold the famous chops like he had been shot. Rock got a clothesline out of the corner, but Ric really has to stop trying to go to the top rope. Batista came in, but Foley would get the tag to attack all of Evolution. Mick went after Orton outside for the mandible claw, but the numbers game was not on his side. Ric attacked him from behind, so Randy could throw the Hardcore Legend into the ring steps. Evolution began working over Foley stiffly. Finally Foley got the hot tag, launching Evolution all over the ring until Batista hit a spine buster. Ric begged for the opportunity… and went for the Ric Flair Strutting Elbow! Rock knipped up though, and knocked Mr. DVD right out of his red boots to resume his hot tag. He landed his own People’s Strutting Elbow on Flair for good measure. He nailed a Rock Bottom on Orton, but Flair pulled him off the pin. Batista grabbed Rocky up for the sit out power bomb, but Flair couldn’t get the pin in time. Now it was Foley’s turn for a hot tag. He down Evolution, hit the double underhook DDT, and readied Randy for the mandible claw. Before he could get it Orton pulled an RKO out of thin air for a three count. ***1/2

After the match, the crowd applauded the return of Foley. A video package for the Hall of Fame inductions is shown. Tastefully, it ended with the Brain wishing Monsoon was here with him. Mean Gene came out to formerly introduce the WWE Hall of Fame, Class of 2004. Bobby Heenan, Tito Santana, Big John Studd post humorously, Harley Race, Pete Rose, Pete Rose, Don Muraco, Greg Valentine, Junkyard Dog post humorously, Superstar Billy Graham, Sergeant Slaughter and Jesse Ventura were all introduced by name to the Hall. A Smackdown! advertisement aired.

Playboy Evening Gown Match: Sable and Torrie Wilson versus Miss Jackie and Stacey Kiebler
The ladies looked absolutely gorgeous, but of course my darling Stacey got the loudest pop, deservedly so. Sable took the microphone to announce that she and Torrie were uncomfortable, so they decided to start the match with their gowns already off. In turn, each team stripped themselves while the announcers verbally masturbated. Miss Jackie refused, however, so the three women forcibly removed them. Then I think the match started… but I really wasn’t paying attention to the whole “Wrestling” part of it. After a reversed roll up Torrie pinned Miss Jackie. Of course, we the fans are the real winners. 0*

Earlier today, some foreign fans talked to a camera. Backstage, Eddie Guerrero went to see his old friend, Chris Benoit. Chris was pacing while Eddie tried to hype him up. Benoit was having none of it. Win or lose, Eddie said he was proud of his friend. Of course, no one expects him to win. Chris blew up and said he believed, and that’s all that mattered. Of course, Eddie was only trying to fire his friend up.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open.
The rules were listed before hand, and indeed the match was gauntlet style with the wrestlers readied at ringside. Chavo Guerrero was automatically chosen as number ten.
Ultimo Dragon and Shannon Moore started the match. Ultimo eliminated Shannon Moore to bring in Jamie Noble. Noble eliminated Ultimo Dragon to bring in Funaki. Noble eliminated Funaki immediately to bring in Nunzio. Jamie Noble eliminated Nunzio to bring in Kidman. Kidman eliminated Jamie Noble to bring in Rey Mysterio Jr. Rey Mysterio Jr. eliminated Kidman to bring in Tajiri, Rey Mysterio eliminated Tajiri to bring in Chavo Guerrero. Chavo Guerrero eliminated Rey Mysterio Jr. to retain the Cruiserweight Title.
A video package detailing the now-meaningless feud between Bill Goldberg and Brock Lesnar was shown.

Brock Lesnar versus Bill Goldberg with Special Guest Referee, Stone Cold Steve Austin
Well listen to the cheers of “You Sold Out!” Look at the signs of “You Sold Out!” Damn this heat is major. “Na na na na… hey hey hey, goodbye.” The announcers even start talking about the “Rumors” of the resignation of Brock Lesnar for the NFL. The two attempt to prove which is stronger with collar and elbow tie ups. Then, they bounce off one another with shoulder blocks – which brings out boos from the crowd. The two knock each off their feet finally, and Bill hits the first actual move of the match. He lifted Brock up in the military press, and dropped him into a modified spear. Bill went for the spear, but missed and flew out of the ring. Lesnar pressed the assault, and the crowd began commenting what the match does, in the realm of sucking. Goldberg got the spear, but Brock kicked out. Bill argued with Austin, long enough for Lesnar to set up and deliver an f-5, which Bill kicked out of. Brock went for his own, unsuccessful spear, which Bill followed up with another of his own. The jackhammer was delivered, and Bill got his pin fall. *

After the match, Lesnar stared menacingly at Austin. The crowd bid him adieu, and Lesnar flipped them off. The Texas Rattlesnake stunned Lesnar out of the ring. Goldberg came to celebrate with beer, for which Austin would stun Goldberg. An ad for Wrestlemania 21 from the Staples center is shown. Vince McMahon and personally thanked the fans for making Wrestlemania.

Sudden Death Fatal Four way Smackdown! Tag Titles Match: WGTT versus APA versus the Basham Brothers versus Rikishi and Scotty 2 Hotty©
It is sad that both brands need to have one of these for their Mania tag matches. Still, the last one was a fairly decent match, so maybe these should be a tradition – but not at this Pay-Per-View. This was a much more controlled match-up than the prior. There were more individual and tandem spots, and less instances of chaos. That is, until Rikishi got the tag for his big man spots. After that, every man would come in turn to fight the big man. Bradshaw cleared the ring, but missed the clothesline from hell. With every competitor down, Rikishi sat on one of the Bashams for the win. **

After the match, the Tag Champs danced. “Edge is coming” the vignette claimed. Jesse Ventura came out to give an interview someone. New York’s own Donald Trump was there for an interview. They chatted a bit, before Ventura mentioned that in 2008 they may need a wrestler in the White House.

Hair versus Women’s Title Match: Molly Holly versus Victoria
Molly was in control for the majority of this match. The announcers talked about everyone but the match and I chatted with a few friends about sex and Dungeons and Dragons. Molly tried to hit Victoria with her own finisher, only for the Champion to escape the Widow’s Peak and get a backslide victory. *

After the match, Molly ran away and ambushed Victoria on the ramp, and nearly cut off her hair. She recovered with some hairspray to the eyes, placed Molly in the chair, tied her down and shaved off her hair. A video package for the Eddie Guerrero and Kurt Angle feud is shown. When we came back, Molly was nearly completely bald. Good for Molly, really selling the angle.

WWE World Championship Match: Kurt Angle versus Eddie Guerrero©
This week the announcers are basing the feud on Eddie being a drug addict. For the record, this is my Main Event. The two teased psychology with some headlocks (They are that good) before Eddie fired up and knocked the Olympian outside. Back in the ring, the two teased wearing the other down with various submissions. Then the two began trading something else, suplexes. They teased a German off the apron, but Eddie held onto the ropes to avoid. When Eddie went up top and splashed outside, however, Angle nimbly dodged and the Challenger was in control. As Michael Cole stated, Angle put on a clinic on how to work over a body part, attacking the midsection of Guerrero with just about every move in the book. Eddie nearly had a Froggy Splash, but only connected with canvas. Kurt began to simply punch Eddie, which only fired Latino Heat up. The match went to a back and forth format, with both Angle trying both his finishers before Eddie countered them. After a Belly to belly off the top, Angle locked the Ankle Lock on. Eddie would reverse that as well. A belly to back suplex was turned into a DDT, and Eddie connected with the frog splash for the closest two-count you have ever seen. A third Ankle Lock left the Champion in agony, and he tried to flee before the fourth one. The Ankle lock pulled Eddie’s boot off, allowing Eddie to escape and roll the champion up – but right in the ropes. Rematch! ***3/4

A video package of Kane versus the Undertaker is showing.

Kane versus the Undertaker
Kane’s entrance featured the false skyline burning behind him. A still-fat Paul Bearer led some torch wielding acolyte/druids to the ring, before Undertaker’s Ministry entrance proper. ‘Taker looked and wrestled like the American badass with slightly longer hair, but he had a hat and super powers! At first this looked like a Saturday Morning Superstars squash match, but soon Kane started getting in some offense. A big boot brought the Dead Man back to control in time for the top rope walk – jumping into the palm of Kane. The pair held each other’s throat, but Kane would be the one to land the choke slam. The Undertaker sat up, however, and began no selling. He hit a choke slam of his own, and called for the Tombstone pile driver for the three-count. *

A video package for Chris Benoit, Shawn Michaels and Triple H’s road to Wrestlemania is shown.

WWE Heavyweight Championship Triple Threat Match: Shawn Michaels versus Chris Benoit versus Triple H©
From the get-go it was obvious there would be no pact between Benoit and Jericho… I mean Michaels. To describe this match, realize that no one held back anyway. Michaels hit a moonsault to the outside. Benoit was tied up in the Tree of Woe, and Hunter Irish whipped HBK into that corner. From there on, the men wisely fought one another, with one man always on the outside taking a breather. This kept the match from turning into a mess. Oddly enough, despite the bad booking, the crowd was firmly behind Benoit, even booing Shawn Michaels. Even when he had hit the flying elbow drop and landed Sweet Chin Music the crowd clearly wanted Benoit to be the winner. At one point Benoit had Triple H a top the three announce tables, but HBK came and Hunter helped him suplex Benoit through the Smackdown! announce table – which also took out a cameraman. While Hunter and HBK wrestled in the ring the crowd still chanted for Benoit. Somehow he got up and got back in the match. Triple H went for the pedigree when he returned, but Chris reversed it in the sharpshooter. The crowd went wild at that. HBK gave Benoit the super kick from his blind side to break up the hold though. The Rabid Wolverine got his shoulder up though, so Shawn set up Sweet Chin music yet again. Benoit ducked it, and took Shawn out the ring. Hunter grabbed Chris for the pedigree, but Benoit reversed it for the cross face! Chris rolled him into the center of the ring, and after a long fight… Hunter tapped out! ****

After the match Eddie Guerrero came to celebrate with his friend as the Radicals hold all the gold. A video package of the show we just watched wished us fair well, and I passed out trying to recap this monstrous show.









• Jeff Hardy Skips Court Appearance & WWE Hall of Fame Class of 2010 Rumored Names (think FACEPAINT)
  

• Quick Links -
  [Back to LOP] [News Archives] [Results] [Columns] [Forums]