WWE SmackDown! Results: 12/25/2003 (Christmas in Iraq)
Submitted by Justin "Locura" Pratt on Friday, December 26, 2003 at 1:16 AM EST



WWE SmackDown!
Date: 12/25/2003
Venue: Camp Victory
Location: Baghdad, Iraq

Happy holidays, everyone!

Welcome to SmackDown! from Iraq! A soldier holding an American flag opens the show, as the National Anthem is played outdoors in front of thousands of American troops.

Your usual commentators are Michael Cole and Tazz, who are not at ringside.

Vince McMahon makes his way down the ramp and into the ring. He says that, on behalf of the WWE, Americans, and freedom-loving people, we have come here in Iraq to say “Thank You.” He says thanks for the privilege to perform for them, for serving in the armed forces, for providing the sacrifice, for protecting our great nation, defending our freedoms, and for having the courage to fight for what we believe in. For kicking ass, taking names, and capturing Saddam. Even though they can’t be at home with their loved ones, the WWE decided to bring a slice of Americana to them today, and that’s know as the WWE. So, let the celebration begin! One more thing… Christmas-themed music plays, and out walks Santa Claus carrying two big bags. Santa waves to the crowd, as Vince thinks he’s here to give him his Christmas present. Santa says no. It’s for somebody else, so Vince asks him to open them up. He takes the bag and goes through the crowd, throwing out a bunch of WWE apparel. Meanwhile, Vince says he wants the biggest present Santa’s got. Santa finishes making his rounds and heads up the ramp, but Vince calls him back. Vince says he forgot the most important thing, as Santa gets back in the ring. Vince wants his present. Santa apparently doesn’t have a present for him. Vince doesn’t like that. He wants an explanation. He said Santa always passed over his house when he was a kid, and he wasn’t a bad kid! He tells his fat ass to get out of the ring. Santa waves to the crowd, then Vince decks him from behind. Vince warns the soldiers… but Santa takes his wig off to reveal… Stone Cold Steve Austin!! Vince turns around to meet two middle fingers and a Stone Cold Stunner! Austin celebrates by downing several beers. After the replay, Austin gets the mic, saying he’s hoarse singing Christmas carols. He thought he’d come out and sing a few songs, but after a few beers, he’d hold back on signing, go back and get some more beers. The crowd says “Hell Yeah!” to getting more beer three times. He says on behalf of himself and the WWE, it’s been our pleasure and privilege to come out and hang with them. He’s always supported the U.S. Armed Forces. He appreciates the sacrifices they make and he is behind them 100%. He wants them to display their middle fingers, and the soldiers do so. Austin says Saddam Hussein could take those and shove them up his ass, to which the crowd enjoys. “And that’s the bottom line, ‘cuz Stone Cold said so!”

Maj. Newlander and Sgt. Palmer go over with the WWE superstars safety precautions in the event of an attack.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 1 ~

A video package shows the setup of the ring and set for the event.

Match #1: The World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. The APA
Bradshaw wears some army gear coming to the ring. Cole says Bradshaw will stay in Iraq to visit some more troops. Faarooq starts out with Shelton Benjamin. Lockup. They push each other to the corner, with Shelton getting the advantage first. A couple of boots, but Faarooq comes back with a 2nd rope tackle. Bradshaw in. He throws Shelton in the corner and knees his midsection. Shelton rakes the eyes and tags in Charlie Haas. Bradshaw with a forearm to the back. Haas fights out of a backbreaker, but Shelton runs in a gets booted. Slam to Haas for 2. Faarooq in. Dominator misses, and he gets clotheslined down. Shelton is in. Right hands, cover for 2. Haas in. They nail a double suplex on Faarooq. Haas covers for 2. Snapmare into a rear chinlock. Body slam. Faarooq comes back with a back body drop. Both men are down. Bradshaw gets the tag, and… HE’S ON FIRE!! Shoulder takedowns, big boot, DDT on Haas for 2. APA hit a double shoulder block on Shelton. Haas gets caught up top and Bradshaw nails the fallaway slam from up top, called the Last Call. Shelton comes in with a superkick, but Faarooq comes in with a slam. Haas misses a charge on Bradshaw, allowing him to nail the Clothesline From Hell! Bradshaw salutes the troops then covers Haas for the victory. The troops were completely behind the APA in this match, and they put on an okay bout.
Winners: The APA
Match Rating: 4.5/10

Austin asks Chris Benoit if he’s ready for his match with Eddie Guerrero. Benoit says he’s ready, and he has a little something for Eddie. Austin wants him to go out there and whoop some ass.

Yikes. Rikishi is doing squats backstage, and off course we gotta zoom in on his backside.

Sgt. James Robert Duke is driving a truck, talking about his daughter and how he’s handled being away from his family.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 2 ~

A few soldiers say hello and happy holidays to their respective family members.

Torrie Wilson is suiting up in the back in a sexy Santa outfit.

Match #2: Rikishi vs. Rhyno
Rhyno looks to Gore Rikishi when his back was turned, but he backs off. They face each other. Rhyno shoves Rikishi, and Rikishi shoves him down. Lockup. Rhyno can’t shoulder block Rikishi down, so Rikishi does it to him. Rhyno with a headbutt. He evades a rollup squash, then kicks him in his big ass. Rhyno with a shoulder charge in the corner. He tries it again, but takes a LOUD superkick from Rikishi. Rikishi goes up to the second rope, but Rhyno gets the knees up. Rhyno attempts the Gore, but Rikishi catches him in the Samoan Drop and gets the pin. Short match.
Winner: Rikishi
Match Rating: 4.5/10

Rikishi isn’t finished, as Rhyno stumbles into Stink Face position… and he gets one! After celebrating, Rikishi gets ready to leave, but then stops to get back in the ring. He tells referee Brian Hebner to pick some soldiers to join him in the ring. Two young female soldiers stand beside Rikishi and dance with him.

The superstars arrive at Camp Victory and engage in a little meet ‘n’ greet. Col. Span gives Vince an honorary gift, which he says 13 men died for.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 3 ~

Spc. Conroe takes several superstars on a ride in a helicopter. They arrive in Camp Anaconda to greet more American troops.

John Cena makes his way out to the ring. He grabs the mic and gets ready to cut a freestyle. In his rap, he says being with them is a dream come true, he’ll bust up Big Show to bust up Saddam’s mug shot, the real big show’s in his crotch, Show beating him is like getting the French to fight, Saddam never had a chance which troops like them, they should’ve buried him in the hole they found him in, and he finishes by speaking from his heart, calling the troops the real heroes.

Eddie Guerrero gives Austin a hug, saying he’s happy to see him. Austin asks him if he brought in a lowrider, but Eddie says they wouldn’t let him bring it. He says it’s probably because they were afraid he’d jam a hydraulic into Saddam’s head. Austin says that Benoit will lie, cheat and steal a victory, but Eddie takes offense to that, saying that’s HIS gig.

A few more soldiers give their best wishes to their familes.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 4 ~

At Camp Anaconda, a soldier is busting a rap to the troops as Cena watches on and laughs.

Match #3: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit
They lockup. They shove each other to the corner, but they break up. Lockup again, Eddie in a headlock then eats a shoulder takedown. Lockup again, Eddie with a wristlock into a headlock takedown. Eddie attacks Benoit’s left arm, then hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Cover for 2. Another cover for 2. Eddie nails a few right hands, but Benoit nails a monkey flip. A few takedowns and chops to Eddie. A pair of helicopters are making their rounds above the camp. Eddie puts on an army vest, which referee Jim Corderas tells him to take off. He shoves the jacket into Benoit’s face then dropkicks him! Eddie hits a pair of chops on Benoit. Benoit with a kick to the midsection, then he back suplexs Eddie over the top rope and gets pulled outside with him.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 5 ~

We come back to Eddie fighting out of a submission hold, but Benoit bends Eddie’s arms back. Eddie fights out by ramming Benoit’s head into the turnbuckle. Eddie goes up but gets caught by Benoit. Eddie botches a top-rope rollup, or something. Eddie plants him with two vertical suplexes, but Benoit latches on the Crossface before the third one even starts. Eddie gets to the bottom rope. Benoit takes control. Two knife-edge chops. Eddie rakes the eyes and hits his own top. Benoit sails Eddie sky high, falling face first. Benoit hits two German Suplexes, but Eddie fights away from third one, but Benoit holds on and nails a shoulder breaker. Benoit goes up top, but he misses the Suicide Headbutt! Both men are down. Eddie is up first, then goes up top. He goes for the Frog Splash… but Benoit rolls out of the way! Benoit can’t hit a German, they reverse moves several times before Eddie rolls up Benoit, grabbing the ropes and getting the pinfall on Benoit. Well, looks like Benoit’s officially back at the midcard. Poor guy. These two put on a great performance, as usual.
Winner: Eddie Guerrero
Match Rating: 7/10

Eddie puts his flak jacket back on along with a helmet. He gets back in the ring with Benoit. Benoit stares down Eddie as the ref confronts him about using the ropes, which he denies. Eddie turns away to rally a “USA!” chant. He wants a handshake from Benoit, and he gets one along with a hug.

More soldiers give shout-outs to their families.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 6 ~

More soldiers, more wishes.

In another video package, Eddie goes over how awesome it is to be here with the troops. Austin along with several other superstars expression their feelings about being in Iraq. Bradshaw says America hasn’t seen a terrorist attack since 9/11 because of the troops. Benoit says, in his 18 years of wrestling, this is the most memorable experience he’s ever had.

Some more soldier give their blessings to their families.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 7 ~

A soldier tells several superstars how to handle weapons. They engage in some target practice.

Non-Match: Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie vs. Sable in a Santa’s Little Helper Contest
As expected, each woman is wearing their very out sexy Santa suit. Ring announcer Tony Chimmel says that each girl will dance for them. Whoever gets the biggest response from the crowd will be declared the winner. Sable goes first, gyrating her pelvis and strutting around the ring, constantly lifting her skit up. Dawn Marie is next, bending over and shaking her bottom, revealing her cleavage, then pulling her shirt open to reveal her bra & panties. Finally we see Torrie Wilson, throwing her hat into the crowd, undoing her belt, then taking her suit completely off. Is that a thong or dental floss? Sable gets a mild response, Dawn gets a slightly better one, and Torrie gets a rousing applause. There you have it, Torrie wins it. Sable and Dawn jump Torrie from behind. Torrie gets up and blasts both girls with her combat boots. She rips off Sable’s shirt as both heels hightail it up the ramp.

Task Force Officer Mike Hester is taking the superstars into downtown Baghdad, the “Green Zone.” They will get into buses as they are protected by gun trucks. After they arrived, the superstars visit the wounded soldiers.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 8 ~

General Art Meyers is reflecting on the performance of the WWE superstars and how it’s positively affected the troops.

Some more soldiers say hello to their families.

Match #4, The Main Event: The Big Show vs. John Cena in a non-title bout
Cena rushes the ring to attack The Big Show. Cena punches Show repeatedly, but Show instantly nails the Chokeslam! Cena rolls out of the ring as he lay motionless. As the ref counts, Cena struggles to his feet. Cena hangs Show up on the top rope. Cena gets in but eats a clothesline. Show with a hard slap to the chest. He tosses Cena. Headbutt. Cena fights back with some punches to the gut, but Show knees him in the midsection. Another headbutt. He applies a chokehold on Cena as he’s in the ropes, so he breaks it up at the count of 4. He applies the abdominal stretch. Cena rakes the eyes to get out, but eats a headbutt. Show boots, but misses and hits the ref. He nails Cena with a sidewalk slam, but the ref is out. Show grabs Cena’s steel chain. He misses the chain shot, and Cena hits a low blow! He grabs the chain and clocks Show with it. He covers Show as the ref comes to, but Show kicks out at 2. Cena evades the chokeslam, then nails the FU on Show! 1-2-3! Pretty short for a main event, as Cena AGAIN goes over Show cleanly without getting a title shot or the title itself. Show controlled this match, and Cena didn’t do anything until the ref was knocked out, and that wasn’t much. I’m half-and-half on this match.
Winner: John Cena
Match Rating: 5/10

Right after the match, Steve Austin comes down to the ring as we cut to commercial.

~ COMMERCIAL BREAK 9 ~

Austin and Cena stare face to face. Cena does the “can’t see me” gesture, so Austin stuns him! Show finally gets back to his feet, but turns around to eat a Stunner! He’s still standing, so he takes another one! Austin puts some shades on and gets a mic. Austin wants the Santa’s Little Helpers to come out one more time, and all three females from the previous contest come down. Austin wants them to give them all a dance, then calls out all the WWE superstars, including Vince McMahon. They all come down the ramp and fill the ring. Austin says he’s not his favorite person in the world, but Vince is the guy who made all this possible. Austin promises not to stun him if he’ll come to the ring. Show stumbles towards Austin as he tells him to keep his hands off him. Austin starts saying something, then hits Show with another Stunner! Austin gives his thanks to everybody. Austin starts distributing beers to all the superstars.

To the music of Creed’s “Weathered”, an excellent video package airs, highlighting the superstar’s entire trip to Baghdad. This closes the program.

Final Thought: Austin, naturally, was the star of the show tonight, and I was surprised to see him there. With all the various videos about Iraq, the soldiers, and the superstars, along with the four good matches and the entertaining segments, this was a solid outing. While providing sports entertainment, the real focus of this show was the show’s dedication to the troops, and the WWE pulled it if spectacularly. My hat’s off to all the courageous superstars who decided to make the journey to Iraq to put on a show for the American troops. However, nobody is braver than the thousands of men and women who are halfway across the world defending our great nation, and I salute and support each and every one of them.

Thank you all for reading, and feel free to send me any feedback you may have. Until next week!

~ Justin Pratt
God Bless America









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