WWE SmackDown! Results: 10/30/2003
Submitted by Justin "Locura" Pratt on Friday, October 31, 2003 at 2:08 AM EST



WWE SmackDown!
Date: 10/30/2003
Venue: The Arena at Gwinnett Center
Location: Atlanta Georgia

What will happen between Undertaker and Vince McMahon tonight? How will Paul Heyman continue his reign as SmackDown! GM? What will the SmackDown! side of the upcoming Survivor Series PPV look like?

We start with recaps of last week’s show, including the induction of Paul Heyman at General Manager and the Undertaker earning a Buried Alive Match with Vince McMahon after defeating Brock Lesnar and The Big Show in a handicap match.

And now, welcome to SmackDown! Your hosts as always are Michael Cole and Tazz.

We open SmackDown! with the entrance of Kurt Angle, your Olympic Hero. Cole announces that it will be Angle’s Team vs. Lesnar’s Team in a Survivor Series style match at the PPV. He’s followed by Chris Benoit, who will be Angle’s partner for tonight. Both men stare each other down as their opponents, John Cena and A-Train come down, where Cena a rap consisting of Angle and Benoit being gay, and he even compared A-Train to a wookie!

Match #1: Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit vs. John Cena & A-Train
Cena and Benoit start it, and they lockup. Cena drives Benoit to corner, then back to the middle where Benoit locks in a side headlock. Cena breaks free only to get taken down with Benoit’s shoulder. He executes a school boy on Cena for 2. Cena hits Benoit several times in the back with his forearms, but Benoit answers with an armdrag as he takes control. He tags in Angle, where he punches the daylights out of Cena, chops him, and hits a snap suplex for 2. A shoulder takedown also gets 2. Cena rakes the eyes, allowing him to tag in A-Train. Angle with right hands to Train, but Train answers with a knee to the midsection. Angle then manages a German Suplex on Train. Cena runs in but takes a backdrop, then he’s clotheslined out of the ring. Angle then walks into a strong clothesline by Train. Train lifts Angle up for a backbreaker, then connects with the 2nd rope splash for 2. Train stomps on Angle in the corner, then hits some knees to his chest. Cena gets the tag and nails Angle with a double axe handle for 2. Cena tries to distract Benoit, but Angle comes back with the Ankle Lock! Train comes in but meets Angle’s fists. Cena clotheslines Angle down. He misses a vertical suplex, and Angle turns it into a DDT! Both men are down. Benoit is itching for the tag… and he gets it! He tries to take down the newly-tagged Train, but can’t knock the big man down. Benoit hits a flying clothesline which finally takes down Train and gets a 2 count. Benoit hits a German Suplex, then goes up top for the Flying Headbutt, but Train rolls out of the way! Both men are reeling, but Train attacks first with a bicycle kick. Angle runs in a hit Train with the Angle Slam! Then Cena runs in and hits the F-U on Angle! He tries the F-U on Benoit, but he chops out of it. Train charges Benoit, but accidentally hits Cena! Benoit plants Cena with the German Suplex Trifecta, get goes cutthroat. He goes up top and connects with the Flying Headbutt! 1-2-3! It’s over! A good match, which was a bit better than their encounter last week.
Winners: Kurt Angle & Chris Benoit
Match Rating: 6/10

Angle and Benoit shakes hands, then head up the ramp. Meanwhile, in the ring, Cena and Train are having a major verbal dispute. Train shoves Cena, which Cena obviously didn’t like. Train then pie faces him, and Cena kicks him square in the groin. Cena lifts Train up on his shoulders and nails him with an F-U!

A very pissed off and grunting Vince McMahon destroys a backstage room as Paul Heyman watches on in horror. Vince wants to know if Heyman realizes what he just did to him. He put him in a Buried Alive Match, of all the asinine, stupid and idiotic things he has down. Heyman pleads for Vince to calm down, to which he respond by irate screaming. He goes over Heyman’s bargain to the Undertaker, then promises that there won’t be a Buried Alive match because he guaran-damn-tees that Taker will be walking into the arena last night for the very last time. Heyman confesses that he gave Taker the night off, and every other night off until Survivor Series. Vince screams and tugs his hair, then goes into sadistic mode. Vince says that terrorists will burn down Taker’s house, his children will be kidnapped, and his wife will be raped by a motorcycle gang right in front of him (oh God, that was completely uncalled for), and Heyman is gonna be in charge of doing it. If Heyman doesn’t, he’s gonna choke the life right out of him.

In the shower room, Torrie Wilson comes out with only a towel on to go over some kinky outfits to where for the Trick or Treat Match with Dawn Marie tonight.

Benoit is walking backstage where he is approached by Angle. Angle says they haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, but says that, together, they’re unstoppable. He wants Benoit to be a part of his team at Survivor Series. Benoit warns Angle that there’s a chance he’ll rip his head off, but Angle insists. Benoit says he’s in, but tells Angle not to make any mistakes because they’re not friend. Angle says he doesn’t want a friend, he wants a win.

Heyman walks into Vince’s office, and Vince asks Heyman what he’s gonna do. “Nothing!” screams Heyman. Vince slowly gets to his feet and glares a hole into Heyman’s head. He says that, being a man of his word, he’s gonna put his hands on Heyman, drag him out to the ring and will enjoy choking the life out of him. Then, after he’s dead, he’ll be fired. Heyman gets into Vince’s face and tells him that he wants to be fired because he’s not gonna get smacked around, like he did to Zach Gowen and Stephanie McMahon. He wants to work for the Vince who used to run companies out of business, that threw in his guts, brains, and balls to run WCW into the ground. He wants to work for a Vince that stared a federal indictment straight in the face and believed in himself. Heyman inquires where Vince’s ruthless aggression went. He adds that Taker can bury him alive at Survivor Series, and that will probably happen unless Vince gets out of this jam. He says Vince was always at his best when he was boxed in. He always showed them that when they try to take him down, they find out the hard way they got no chance in hell. Vince storms out of his office.
In the first segment, I hated that comment Vince made about raping Taker’s wife. There’s no need for that on a wrestling show, even if you are Vince McMahon and your character is madly evil. Vince, however, did do his typical evil madman mode well, and Heyman’s pep talk that included Vince’s lost edge and his history was sensational.
Segment Rating: 3.5/5

Cole talks about the SmackDown! live events in the south.

Tajiri join Tazz and Cole at ringside along with the Japanese Mafia. Tazz wants to know who they are exactly, to which Tajiri retorts in Japanese.

Match #2: Rey Mysterio vs. Ultimo Dragon
The winner of this match will be the #1 Contender for the Cruiserweight Championship. Rey Mysterio locks up with Ultimo Dragon. Dragon with an armlock then a headlock. Both flip around for a while and Dragon hits a shoulder takedown. Dragon misses a clothesline, which allow Rey to hit a springboard off the 2nd rope for 2. Dragon starts a kick fest all over Rey’s body. Rey drops down and Dragon covers for 2. Dragon runs into a boot by Rey, then runs into a back elbow and takes a head-scissors. Rey legdrops Dragon’s knee, then hits the wheelbarrow bulldog for a near fall. Rey counters a vertical suplex and sets Dragon up for the 619. Dragon gets to his feet before Rey can hit it and flips Rey over to the outside. However, Rey lands on the apron and leaps over the ropes at Dragon, but Dragon answers with a hard kick to the gut. Rey shoves Dragon away, causing him to accidentally stumble into the referee. Dragon tries to help the ref as Tajiri rushes to the ring to deliver a stiff kick to Rey’s head. Dragon takes advantage and gets the pinfall over Rey. This match had something going until the abrupt ending. Way too short, as Dragon looked good here and shouldn’t been given a better chance to shine, especially since now he has a title shot.
Winner: Ultimo Dragon
Match Rating: 4.5/10

Tajiri and his two cronies come into the ring ready to attack Dragon… but they bow instead. Dragon backs away and leaves the ring.

Brock Lesnar and The Big Show are in their locker room, bickering about their loss last week. Lesnar told Show to be on top of his game, and Show said he was. Lesnar was the one knocked out by the chain. Lesnar fired back, saying that if Show wasn’t such a big clutzy giant, to which Show says “Screw you” to Lesnar. Lesnar says he’s the WWE Champion. He doesn’t need to make excuses. They bicker back and forth until a stagehand comes in to tell Brock that Heyman wants to see him.

Heyman walks out with two giant men… and aw shit, one of them is Nathan Jones. After rightfully being gone for so long, I hope like hell he actually learned some wrestling. I don’t know who the other man is. Heyman starts by saying time is money and money is time. None will be wasted on his show. He introduces us to Nathan Jones, going over his criminal background. He then introduces the other man, Matt Morgan, the #1 draft pick for Heyman’s SmackDown. Just like Lesnar was the Next Big Thing, now Morgan will assert dominance on every athlete that falls before his greatness. Getting down to business, he calls out Lesnar. Brock stands outside the ring as Heyman laughs. Lesnar tells Heyman to shut up. He hasn’t forgotten about Heyman, and Heyman obviously should not have forgotten about him. He’s not stupid. He knows Heyman is gonna make both men beat his ass. Heyman proclaims that he just wants to talk business. Lesnar says that’s fine and dandy, but if he’s gonna get in the ring to talk business, he’s gonna be accompanied by a friend. Cue Big Show, who, along with Lesnar, get in the ring and stare down Jones and Morgan. Lesnar tells them to back off. He admits he’s nervous because of the history he’s had with Heyman, but then declares he can make history on two men tonight. He tells Heyman he hates his guts, and he always has. He says if Heyman wants to talk business, then talk fast. Heyman goes over that it was his idea to give Lesnar his own team to face Angle’s team as Survivor Series, and says that Show, Jones, and Morgan will be a part of his team. Brock says he likes it. Heyman adds that some people think Lesnar makes a lousy WWE Champion, and Show makes a lousy U.S. Champion. They’ll be made an example out of tonight, as Heyman sets up tonight’s main event as Lesnar & Show against the APA. Brock likes the sound of that, but asks Heyman why he should trust him. Heyman says he’s not supposed to. He’s supposed to trust his greed as a businessman and greed to have the best main event on SmackDown!
This segment told the Heyman/Lesnar rivalry well, as both heels reluctantly join forces. We saw a proper introduction of a new talent, overlooking the fact that he’s a hoss and not subject to being squashed in his debut ::coughpaullondoncough::. We have 4 giant men for Team Lesnar, and it makes you wonder how Team Angle (no, not the former Haas/Benjamin Team Angle) will respond.
Segment Rating: 4/5

Backstage, Orlando Jordan and Paul London and playing Wrestlemania X9 on GameCube, when Dawn Marie. She flashes them her outfit and asks if they like it, to which they give very positive (and excited) reactions.

Another Hardcore Holly video shows. He taunts Lesnar and promises to make him suffer for taking away 12 months of his life.

Match That’s Not Really A Match: Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie in a Trick or Treat Halloween Costume Match
Funaki is in the ring, wearing a multicolored shirt and an afro wig. In broken English, he introduces Torrie, who comes out in a sexy bunny costume. Dawn comes out next, wearing a Wonder Woman costume. Funaki goes over the rules, making sure we can’t understand what the hell he’s saying. He says the crowd will pick the winner, and then tells Torrie to go first. Torrie throws a carrot into the crowd, shakes her ass then prances around the ring to moon both sides of the arena. Funaki begs Dawn to go. She does some seductive posing, gyrating her pelvis in those very, VERY short blue shorts while Funaki’s mouth is gaped wide open. The crowd gives their reactions, and although I personally think they both got an equal reaction, Tazz calls it a landslide and Funaki declares Torrie the winner. We all knew that would happen, right? Part 2 of this event is the Trick or Treat contest, which involves bobbing caramel apples in a tub of chocolate sauce. Dawn insists that she goes first. She has Funaki take off her boot. She gets into tub, covering herself from the neck down completely in chocolate. Then, she removes her top and stands up to reveal chocolate-covered naked boobies! Hey, whatever doesn’t make censorship! As Dawn gets out of the tub, Tazz grabs a mic and gets in the ring. He says he just saw the treat, but says Funaki just isn’t down with Halloween, so let’s show him the trick. Torrie sticks her carrot in Funaki’s mouth, throws off the fro, takes off his colored shirt and asks him for trick or treat. Funaki eagerly wants treat. Tazz looks ready to push Funaki into the chocolate tub, but Torrie pushes Tazz in instead! Tazz is rollin’ in chocolate as Cole calls him a Hershey Kiss, then a peanut butter cup.
This T&A was mildly entertaining with the usual Torrie/Dawn stuff and Torrie winning as usual. Tazz getting soaked in chocolate was entertaining enough for me to give this an extra point.
Segment Rating: 3/5

We see a video of Ernest “The Cat” Miller bustin’ a move. Seems like Miller is ready for an in-ring return. Somebody call my mama!

Cena is approached by Lesnar backstage. Lesnar congratulates him, Cena wants to know what for. Lesnar says there’s talk going around that Heyman might name him as the fifth man for Team Lesnar, but he doesn’t know for a fact. Lesnar walks away as Cena stares straight-faced. Something suspicious about this, methinks….

WWE Slam of the Week: Tazz getting shoved in the chocolate tub moments ago.

Tazz is back in his announcer’s seat at ringside, covered in chocolate. He then gives Cole a big hug, smearing him with chocolate!

Chavo Guerrero is upset at his uncle, Eddie Guerrero backstage. He’s disappointed in Eddie because he not only lost the U.S. Championship, which is fine, but he lost the tag team titles, all in the same week. Chavo’s title, his bread and butter, is gone now. He says Eddie let himself, his family all latinos, and him down. He tells Eddie he’s sinking really low, just like when he was on drugs and alcohol (ouch). It makes him sick. He can’t even look at him. He wants Eddie to publicly apologize to him and to everybody else, because he owes one. Chavo walks away as Eddie collects his thoughts.

Eddie comes out to the arena, without his lowrider but with his head hanging low. He gets in the ring and grabs a mic. He says Chavo is right for demanding an apology. He has a lot to be sorry for because he lost two titles in one week. He let Chavo down, he let la rasa down, and he let la familia down. He says he’s sorry. When he comes out in front of the people, he always gives them his heart, and if that’s what he hasn’t done then he apologizes. Massive “Eddie!” chants start. Eddie continues by saying what Chavo said about his past drug and alcohol problems hurt. This isn’t a game and it’s not a match. This is life. Apparently, a fan at ringside yells “You suck!” at Eddie, which causes him to look at the man and tell him he’s right, he does suck. He can bring himself to understand why Chavo would say something like that to him, because maybe he is in a weak state. Eddie pauses for a moment. Maybe it’s good that he brought it up, he continues. It brings back what he did when he was down in that hell. He didn’t get out of that hole by feeling sorry for himself. He sees hope and maybe that’s all he’s got, but he’ll take it and hold on to it. His father told him that the character of a man is not defined by how he’s on top, but how he picks himself up when he’s down. He will not give up because it’s not the Latino style. He’s gonna fight! At this point, Eddie starts getting himself and the crowd fired up. He has faith that he will be a champion and the Guerreros will stand here proud again! Eddie looks up the ramp to see Shaniqua come down, holding both tag belts. Eddie calls her a mamacita wannabe. He says she should think twice before stepping into the ring, because if she does, she should be ready to take on his LATINO HEAT! The Basham Brothers rush in from behind Eddie, but Eddie seees them and starts taking them both out. Eddie hurls Shaniqua into the ring. He hits a back suplex on Doug, then one on Shaniqua. Eddie feels froggy and goes up top, but Danny knocks Eddie down to the outside. Both Bashams start wailing on Eddie, and they launch him into the steel steps. The brothers go into the ring to check on Shaniqua as Chavo runs out to Eddie’s side. He helps Eddie up the ramp as he points and yells at the Bashams.
Eddie showed us why he is the hottest superstar currently in the WWE. Great segment, which not only saw Eddie fired himself up but enhance Los Guerreros’ feud with the Bashams.
Segment Rating: 4/5

In the back, Eddie refuses medical help as Heyman walks in. Eddie demands to face the Basham brothers. Heyman says he knows how badly he wants the, but new General Manager, new rules. Everybody has to earn his way with him. He’ll let Los Guerreros earn their way next week, as Eddie will face the Bashams next week. If he wins, he gets a title shot. Eddie gets excited, but Heyman informs him that it’ll be Eddie only, as the match is a Handicap Match. Eddie is furious.

John Matthews interviews Angle backstage, going over Lesnar’s massive team. Angle agrees that Lesnar’s team is enormous, but admit he likes his team’s chances. He has Benoit and he has a new teammate, who has waited over a year to get his hands on Lesnar: Hardcore Holly. He says his two other guys are over there… showing two fat men scratching their ass. Josh looks confused. No, not there! THERE! In walks Faarooq and Bradshaw, shaking hands with Angle. They head off for their match, as Faarooq looks at the fat men and says, “Damn!”

A pre-taped interview with The Undertaker is shown next. Since Thursday, he keeps getting asked the same two questions: Was the beating he took worth it? Why Vince? As far as the beating goes, sometimes in life gotta take a few beatings to get what you want. He wants Vince because there’s nothing more he wants right now in life than to become a 5-time WWE Champion, but that won’t happen as long as Vince is around. He says the whole match was Vince’s idea because of his words. He subconsciously planted the thought into his head. If he’s gonna get a fair shot at the title as long as Vince is breathing, then he guesses it’s time he stops breathing. When all is said and done, he can use the old cliché on Vince, “You dug your own grave.”

Match #3, The Main Event: Brock Lesnar & The Big Show vs. The APA
Lesnar and Bradshaw start, with Lesnar getting in an offensive onslaught, including the shoulders to the gut. Bradshaw quickly fights back with a clothesline, then some clubbing blows to Lesnar’s back. Lesnar misses a clothesline and Bradshaw hits a shoulder takedown. Lesnar pushes Bradshaw into his corner and tags in Show, who headbutts Bradshaw down. He gets up and hits some hard punches on Show, but Show plants him with a sidewalk slam for 2-count. Show with another headbutt, followed by big chops in the corner. Bradshaw boots Show’s face and pushes him away enough for him to get the tag to Faarooq. He knocks Lesnar off the apron then throws right hands to Show. Show answers back with a big boot. He goes to lift Faarooq up, but out of nowhere comes Bradshaw with the Clothesline From Hell! Faarooq quick into the cover! 1-2-NO! Bradshaw goes outside to get Lesnar, but ends up being whipped into the steel steps. Lesnar runs into the ring with a chair and cracks Faarooq across the spine for the blatant disqualification. Short match, DQ ending, and the only exciting part was the near-fall, but that didn’t help much.
Winners: The APA via DQ
Match Rating: 4/10

Mandatory aftermatch beating ensues. Show hits the Chokeslam on Faarooq. Lesnar then whacks Faarooq’s left knee with the chain. Lesnar places the chair on his knee, and Show gets up on the 2nd rope to hit a leg drop across the chair onto his knee! Lesnar then hits a LOUD chairshot to Bradshaw’s skull as he tried to rush in. Lesnar tries to take out Bradshaw’s knee, but Angle and Benoit run in to make the save. Angle hits the Angle Slam on Show and Benoit hits a German Suplex on Lesnar! Angle then locks Show in the Ankle Lock while Benoit locks in the Crossface on Lesnar.! In comes Jones and Morgan to boot away Angle and Benoit. Morgan hits a sitdown powerbomb on Angle as Jones hits a gutwrench powerbomb on Benoit. Lesnar, Show, Morgan and Jones raises their arms in celebration as SmackDown! comes to a close.

Final Thought: The major problem with tonight’s show was the fact that there were only 3 matches. 3 matches! Neither of those there were high quality, but the opening tag bout was pretty good. Paul Heyman dominated the show, but I thought he was used effectively, and Vince’s airtime was minimal. Scripted or not, I didn’t like Vince’s rapist and terrorist comments at all. As great SmackDown! needs to have a balance of sports and entertaining. Very few matches and a crapload of segments didn’t make this a great show, but it was entertaining enough. This show gets the mediocre rating.

As always, comments and feedback much appreciated. Until next week!
~ Justin Pratt
You talkin’ to me?
Website Plug









*NEW GALLERY* Very PRIVATE Shots of Maria & CM Punk MAKING OUT!!

• Quick Links -
  [Back to LOP] [News Archives] [Results] [Columns] [Forums]