Stuck in the Middle With You - Meet the WWE's Newest Hoss!

Stuck in the Middle With You - Meet the WWE's Newest Hoss!
Submitted by Da J-Train on Sunday, October 19, 2003 at 1:15 AM EST

Hey everyone and welcome back to my column. It's been three weeks since my last column and I know that you are all so eager to fall into my little world of wrestling opinion, so let's not beat around the proverbial bush. Ha Ha Ha.. I said bush.

Anyway, what is on tap for this column? First of all, I want to allow you fans to SOUND OFF. I have been told that some of my columns are long, and I am considering cutting the Feedback O Rama section out. However, I know that some of you like seeing your letters answered, so I am giving YOU the power. KEEP IT OR LOSE IT… OR EVEN A SUGGESTION ON HOW TO SHORTEN IT… OR MAYBE YOU THINK THE COLUMN IS FINE THE WAY IT IS! Either way, send me an email telling me your opinion and/or vote. In the mean time, our column today will focus on Jon Heidenreich, the latest “hoss” to be on the WWE’s main roster.

BUT FIRST...

Letters! I get Letters! I get sacks and sacks of Letters! LETTERS!!! That's right; it's time to answer some of my Love, Hate, Kind-Of-Care-For, and I-Only-Like-You-as-A-Friend-Mail… After all, this is better than sex with Bette Midler… although, she does have some nice cans on her. Ugh, I am in a weird mood, so, here we go:

Feedback O Rama

Letter 1 :

you have a vey good article jericho is by far THE COOLEST GUY EVA so make a part of you article tword him please if not i,ll cry

covenantraider

Well covenantraider, I do take requests for columns and I do like to fulfill readers’ requests, but I mentioned in my first column that I don’t do Bio-Columns, which is what you are asking of me. I don’t want to shame you, but judging by your letter… are you, by any chance, 8 years old? I mean, I hate to make fun, but damn. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, I was 8 once. It’s the confusing teenage years you have to look out for.

P.S. I Kid, I Kid

Letter 2

Hey Champ, it's your old buddy WHAT667 from LOP forums here.

Really enjoyed your column on WWE's hit and miss but you really got me to think on Triple H. It's no secret that since he's comeback from his quad injury that he's become so political.Not saying that it's wrong to look out for yourself but it seems that thats the only thing he cares about nowadays......himself. But why? Is he still bitter about how he got blackballed for participating in the Clique farewell party at MSG? Is he jealous of the fact that both Austin and Rock became bigger stars than him in the WWF as well as mainstream crossover stars (Rocky especially)? Has his constant string of injuries and the fact that he realizes that he was never that great caused him to become a bit paranoid? Has he lost confidence in himself?

What is with Paul Lesvesque?

WHAT667, you have always been one of my favorite readers and you are the best person to verify that I take requests. Anyway, to your question, I think that Triple H’s problem is a mixture of all 3 of the things that you listed. However, I think that the simple fact is, he acknowledges that he CAN do this, and there is nothing stopping him. With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility. Unfortunately, the reality is that some, who have to power, don’t use the responsibility the way they should. It’s simply a reality that we have to accept.

Letter 3

Hey, I used to write columns myself and be a big internet wrestling fan from about 96-00, but I started to grow really enraged with all the stupidity that was going on everywhere. Quite frankly, I was growing upset in about '01 with the angles that the WWF was going at. I thought that I would tell you that your column was the most entertaining column that I have ever read in all of my years as an internet wrestling veteran. Mixture of wit, comedy, and factual information. What really caught my attention was Chris Jericho. I have been a Jericho fan since he debuted in 1996 and like many others, I have observed the charisma that he possesses that is matched by no one else. The WWE has no idea what to do with him. They hype him up for this big match against Shawn Michaels and have him lose at Wrestlemania once again, only to beat him what, like a week later? Shawn Michaels did not need to win that match. Chris Jericho was over allready, true, but Michaels should have done what was right and went into management and said, "let him beat me. I don't have anything else left to prove in this sport." Chris Jericho may have not been the success that he potentially could have as the champion, but I would like one to take into consideration that he was basically feuding with HHH the whole time. We are all so burned out of him. For the past five years or so he has been at top, coming out all roided up (look at him in 96/97 and you will know what I mean) and pulling the same routine; matches over and over again. They haven't had anyone hold the title for more than six months or so since the early ninties and they have him hold it for a year, boring the fans to death, spitting his water, and wearing his pseudo-gay outfits. I consider myself a wrestling fan. I prefer the matches over the angles and other ronchyiness that exists in the wrestling world today. I know that there are many of us out there. I don't see why the WWF sorry WWE doesn't make an attempt to draw to those fans more. Having Goldberg as the champion won't please anyone but children and drunk college kids. WCW in the mid-ninties was my favorite wrestling period to watch and as soon as Goldberg came along, and observing the push for him, I knew that WCW was going to rise and fall. It virtually did. I guess that that the wrestling world has changed and there is nothing that we can do about it, but I must conclude that it is not too late for the WWE to go back. – FEMAagent3

Thank you very much for being a reader and for giving me one of the best compliments that I have ever gotten. I truly agree with what you had to say on the issues of Chris Jericho, HHH, and especially Goldberg. Make no mistake about it, there is no wrestler that I dislike more than Goldberg. Also yes, you are right, it’s not too late for the WWE to go back. The only way, I feel that they will save themselves, is to realize that their style of wrestling and entertainment is dated, and they should allow some alternatives. Like… A.J. Styles maybe? I am glad you like the column.

Letter 4

Hey man,

cool to see a letter get answered. Two topics I wouldn't mind seeing you
tackle--

1) Angle VS Hart. The possibility of this happening, speculation on match
quality, etc. I think that this would be the Rock VS Hogan for the wrestling
purist. Where Hogan and Rock were sports entertainer vs sports entertainer, this
would be wrestler VS wrestler.

2) The constant rookie angle the WWE uses. I've noticed this angle is
terrible to a fledgling wrestler's career. It seems that if you're a rookie, you
tend to get beaten up most of the match and then win via fluke roll up pin or you
just get squashed. Look at Maven--he's no longer a rookie at all, but he is
still treated as one by booking. And besides, what self respecting veteran would
want to get beaten by a "rookie"? It makes the veteran look bad and gives
nothing to the "rookie". IMHO, this rookie angle is unneccesary since the WWE is
the big leagues, they can just act like he's been around just not on WWE tv.
If they wish to create new successful wrestlers, they need to go the Brock
Lesnar and Undertaker route. Bring in a new guy with some hype and some
credibility.

Great column, tito's got some competition! Joking aside, keep up the good
work.

- JAMES

Congrats James, you are officially the first reader to make Feedback O Rama twice! Go out and treat yourself to a nice expensive dinner on me! My credit card number is… Anyway, on to your questions. I would truly love to see Hart vs. Angle at Wrestlemania. It truly is a shame that he can no longer wrestle, because that match would be a guaranteed classic… more so than Hogan and Rock. It is also good to see that they talked it out like respectable men and didn’t create rap CD’s about each other. As for your rookie question, I don’t know what’s going on with that. I truly don’t think the WWE know how to market a new wrestler anymore, after Sean O’Haire’s AWESOME build up, and then no follow up. So, they are stuck in rookie hell with no build up. It’s disappointing. Thanks, and sorry for cutting your letter down a bit.

Letter 5

Hey, been reading LoP stuff for awhile now, I used to just read spoilers and news, but after reading columnists Tito, DaveyBoy, and Snapple, i came back for the columns as well. I think yours have caught my attention because you don't review things (which is nice, but when two reviews say two different things, and i haven't seen what they are reviewing, it makes it hard to draw my own conclusion), and you talk about the system behind the big bad WWE (get the F out, boy i wonder how many t-shirts they sold on that one). I think the developmental system for wrestling is increasingly more difficult to achieve success than it ever has been, because you can take a Garrison Cade or Orlando Jones, who did well down below, and throw them in the spotlight, and get nothing but crowd silence. The WWE's want of reality, mixed in with creating life-like characters, almost makes you wish Garrison grew an alter-ego of a pirate and walked down the ramp with a parrot on his shoulder, or that Orlando Jones claimed he was Ahmed Johnson's long lost brother.
As for the signing of Yang, when was the last time they signed a cruiserweight, and actually did something with him? The cruiserweight division is still alive because the dorks behind the curtain have to sheepishly admit that people enjoy watching Tajiri vs Rey Mysterio, or a tag team of Spanky and Paul London, or the secret acknowledgement of how entertaining the X-Division is in NWA TNA. Hell, AJ Styles is champion, what do you think the WWE would do with him? Notice how when Vince was not as involved in Smackdown, Rey Rey's debut had him facing the likes of Benoit and Kurt Angle. Now that there's no time for it, because Vince needs time, Rey is pushed back into his 'natural' division.
I agree with you, there are positives, and despite being negative at times, i think it has been that positivity that has kept me watching, the hope that it will not get worse, that the product i have watched since childhood will still do things to surprise and entertain me. I know there are performers out there who can achieve that. It's just up to the big-thinkers backstage to actually let them do it. Have a good one.
Addie

Thanks for the feedback and the kind words. I feel that what would happen with A.J. Styles is that in his first match, he would hit lots of his impressive maneuvers, and thereby forcing the crowd to cheer for him because there is no way that you can’t. In the mean time, in accordance to please the crowd the WWE would allow him to work that way because they see that the people like it. The same thing happened with Rob Van Dam... however, I see Styles going farther than RVD in that situation because he can work the mic relatively well. Yes, he will never be used the way he should be if he were in the WWE, but all I am asking for is some mainstream exposure in the WWE, and that’s what I will get. It’s up to him and the fans how far he goes then, because no matter how much the fans don’t want to admit it, I think if a wrestler is popular enough and there is no way to deny him stardom, the WWE will grant it. Thanks again for your feedback!

Alright, enough of this whole whoo hah, it's time to get to the topic of my column:

Meet the New “Hoss”

This past Monday commemorated the second time that former UPW wrestler and OVW Developmental Wrestler John Heidenreich appeared as a fan of Stone Cold Steve Austin on WWE Raw. I, for one, recognized him right away, however, I know that there are fans that are not as familiar with the WWE developmental system as I am, and didn’t know who he was either time. However, it kind of saddened and disappointed me to read in the Lords of Pain forums that Jon got such a negative reaction.

Many fans were talking about Jon as just another hoss for Vince to shove down our throats. In many ways, they were implying that being a hoss, he has no talent, and is just a waste of money and a waste of TV time, without ever actually seeing him wrestle. I would have hoped that the posters in the forums would be a little more open minded and would have at least acknowledged the fact that we all know very little if anything about John Heidenreich and that it is wrong to make a blind judgment about a wrestler with such little knowledge about him. However, who can blame them right? After all, the WWE does have its fair share of “hosses” that get unwarranted pushes and undeserved wins. People like Albert certainly come to mind. However, it’s usually the stigma these days for a big wrestler, that he is called a hoss. Personally, I hate the term. It’s like the word “Mark”. I can’t stand either one of those terms because not only are they thrown around too much, but there is also a huge negative connotation to both terms. It’s almost as if just because Jon Heidenreich is a certain height or has a bigger build, he is a “hoss” and is therefore untalented, again, a waste of time. I, for one, refuse to pass judgment on John Heidenreich before I see him perform. And I understand why some of you want. You are concerned about the product that you take time out to watch and support. It is totally understandable to show concern about a new wrestler who seems like he may damage the credibility and entertainment value of the shows and product in general. However, let’s, for a second, weigh John Heidenreich’s chances of making his WWE stint a worth while experience:

First off, one of the major things that Heidenreich has going for him is his training. Not to sound repetitive to my last column, but Heidenreich is one of the many people from UPW to make it to the main roster of the WWE. Now, that may not work in his favor, because as I proved in my last column, the UPW and WWE relationship is very hit or miss. However, two of the latest UPW alums that have grown into respected, well received wrestlers: John Cena and Victoria. Also, there is one major miss, but we’ll come back to that guy later. The point is, based on where he is coming from; he does have a fair chance of making it, and being a worth while wrestler in the WWE. Another thing he has going for him is his size. Unfortunately, because he is 6’7”, 300 lbs, Jon Heidenreich will likely get a decent sized push to begin with. That is a thing that goes in his favor. Vince McMahon tends to favor the larger wrestlers, that’s no secret. So, in the beginning, he will probably get a decent sized push. What I urge is that you watch a few of his matches and get to know his character before you label him and claim that he is being “shoved down your throat”. There is no avoiding it, due to his size; he will probably get some attention. Deal with it. In the mean time, think about this… Big Bad John, as he is called in OVW, has been a mainstay on their shows and have evolved into a legitimate enforcer character in the Bolin Services faction… a faction which once employed the services of Rico, Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, and yes, even John Cena. In the mean time, the fact that he such an enigma to us, lends the fact that his character has many different possibilities that can be presented. My personal hope is that he adopts a psychotic fan type of character, much like Kathy Bates’s character in the movie Misery. Make him the slightly psychotic fan of Stone Cold Steve Austin, and allow him to harm Steve when he does not live up to his expectations. Anyone who outright attacks Steve Austin is bound to be booed. In the mean time, the fact that he is such a big guy can work to the advantage of the character. If he attacks Stone Cold, it’s believable that Austin will be hurt, or at least hurt enough to not fight back.

Finally, Heidenreich has a finely tuned athletic background. There was once a day that when it was laughable for a legitimate athlete of the NFL to become a wrestler. Now, not only is it conceivable, but hell, you could be the World Champion! Heidenreich has played in 4 different professional football leagues: The NFL, The CFL, Arena Football, and NFL Europe. Not only that, he also has a background in martial arts. He has a black belt in Shotokahn karate. He has earned his slot on a Super Bowl winning Washington Redskin team, and is a former teammate of Mr. William Goldberg… the champ. So, Jon Heidenreich is carrying along with him a fair amount of legitimate athleticism.

HOWEVER

There still is a distinct possibility that Jon Heidenreich may be a bust. Like I said, the UPW way is not a guaranteed hit! After all, the last hoss the UPW has sent along to the WWE was a major miss, and that is Nathan Jones. If history repeats itself, we could easily see Heidenreich as a major bust. That very well could happen. What leads me to believe that it could happen is the fact that Heidenreich has a tag team history with Nathan Jones. Perhaps they were paired together because of their size, but what I fear is that it’s because of similar styles… which does not fare well for Heidenreich. Also, Heidenreich is one of the only people I can remember who was released from his WWE developmental contract at one time, only to be re signed. What does that say about Jon Heidenreich? In some ways, it means that he has improved considerably from once being not good enough to be kept on the developmentals, to being a part of the main roster. However, I really think it says a lot that he was released in the first place. That’s definitely something you don’t want on your resume.

I don’t want to come off as the representative for Jon Heidenreich, and I have clearly showed that he has just as much chance of succeeding that he has at failing and becoming just another “hoss”. I simply urge you readers to at least give him a chance. It disappointed me that fans of our forum were passing judgment on a wrestler that they have never seen. So, in the mean time, watch him. If you don’t like him, fine. If you do, don’t be taken back to admitting that you like a “hoss”. Similarly, if he ends up being a bust, I will acknowledge that. I am not for or against him, simply clearing the air and trying to give him a fresh start. It is up to him to take his ball and run with it.

Random Stops Along the Way

I enjoy playing my NCAA Football 2004 Dynasty. In that game, if you are a lower ranked team, and you are beating a high ranked team at home, the crowd begins an O-VER-RA-TED chant. It led me to wonder, why we don’t use that kind of a chant in wrestling. I think the Overrated chant is funny, and to be honest, I think the best wrestler for this chant, is Goldberg. It’s not that Goldberg is overrated (he is), it’s just that he is a wrestler who, in storylines we are told to BELIEVE THE HYPE. Hell, if the fans aren’t buying the hype, the only logical chant is the overrated chant. Hey, if you can think another wrestler is good for the chant, be my guest, and chant it, but I am still sticking with Goldberg.

I think Mark Jindrak should be traded to Smackdown or Sean O’Haire should be traded to Raw to reform their tag team. No matter how successful they are, Jindrak and Garrison Cade just doesn’t seem natural to me. I feel that O’Haire and Jindrak should reform their team (preferably on Raw to join Evolution) and Garrison Cade should then be put in the role that he SHOULD be in right now and that he has been portrayed as many times, the protégé of Shawn Michaels. That would at least give him some personality. Speaking of no personality, why is Maven now stinking up my Raw on a permanent basis? I can’t stand Maven.

I love the way the WWE has built up the cruiserweight title match for the No Mercy pay per view. Instead of having Tajiri and Rey Mysterio constantly fighting each other, exposing each others weaknesses, they have fought in separate matches where each other’s strengths were featured. Also, the whole mist being seen as a deadly gimmick is a great way to instill fear into Tajiri’s character, leading into a possible Japanese Mafia (I agree with the forum members, they should be called the Yakuza). However, where will Ultimo Dragon fit into that storyline, because there really is no avoiding him? Will he be the lone wolf face, who helps Rey and other cruiser faces defeat the faction, or will he join and fit into a respected heel mafia leader role, based on his international notoriety? I am looking forward to seeing this one progress.

Rest in Peace Stu Hart. That’s all I have to say to that.

TIME TO RANT… AND YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS! This has gotten lots of positive feedback and it’s always good to stick with what people like. So, let’s go back to another round of….

Free Flowing Hostility: 5 minor cultural items I am Bored With, Tired Of, and Pissed At.

1. Christmas. Let me get one thing straight before my little rant here... I don’t hate Christmas itself. I think it is a very magical holiday and it is one of my favorites. The reason that Christmas made the infamous list of 5 is because I was walking in my mall a few weeks ago, heading to Best Buy to purchase a DVD, naturally. It was a brisk, yet comfortable September 28th in Syracuse, NY. As I walked toward the store, I looked down to the floor below us, and I saw something that infuriated me. There already was a store selling Christmas trees and all lit up and shit! That is SO fucked up. Look, I know that our economy is pretty much tied to Santa’s ass, as Lewis Black once said, but to have a store dedicated to the sale of Christmas items before September is even over is a little psychotic. Besides, instantly we have bypassed two of my favorite, and in my opinion, two of the most important holidays… Halloween and Thanksgiving. Halloween is the day where anyone can be whatever they want without fear of persecution from society. Thanksgiving is a day where we commemorate the peace offering between the people who were here first, and the people who eventually stole and raped those people of their land. But hey, let’s not get political. There should be no mentioning of the Christmas Season in a capitalistic or profit gaining way until the day after Thanksgiving, or, Black Friday. Again, I love Christmas, but the season keeps getting longer and longer and it’s really getting ridiculous

2. These people who think its cool/funny/controversial/anything else to commemorate the Olsen Twins becoming legal. Anyone else getting sick of this shit? I know I am. For some reason, the Olsen Twins becoming legal became some kind of sick phenomenon in this country. I ask this… what’s the big deal? You all knew that this was going to happen someday, and what do these people think… that once Mary Kate and Ashley become 18, they are going to go on a nationwide tour giving all of these people hand jobs? Don’t get me wrong, it’s not the thought of someone younger having potential of being hot when they are legal that I find sick. I just don’t understand the appeal of the Olsen Twins. I mean, I grew up watching them grow up on Full House. It would be like fantasizing about my sister. Same goes for that Raven chick on the Disney channel. In the mean time, it’s not funny or shocking to me to be a big jail baiter, so please... stop this shit.

3. People who wear their watches on the under portion of their wrist. I saw this for the first time when I saw Sandra Bullock in the film Speed, and guess what, I have hated Sandra Bullock ever since. But don’t worry; it’s not because of her watch wearing thing… I’m not that shallow… it’s simply because she sucks. But, I just don’t understand the logic of putting your watch on the underside of your wrist. A wristwatch was meant for easy access to the time by simply looking at your wrist. Why would you need to bend your wrist in an uncomfortable and unnatural looking way in order to look at the time? Then again, this may be a fashion statement, and one thing I have never understood was modern fashion… which is why I just have my own look.

4. Customer Service I just think that the whole principle of customer service has gone to incredible and ridiculous lengths in this country. The whole “customer is always right” concept has made lots of people in this country spoiled assholes, and it goes to ridiculous lengths. Here’s an example, and this is a true story. On Sunday, August 24, 2003 (I remember the date because it was Summerslam), I was working and a customer returned a video and demanded his money back. I asked him what was the problem, and he told me that the movie was full of black people. I thought about it, and I didn’t think that anyone would be THAT ignorant to demand a free rental due to such a reason, so I asked him if the color was off and made all of the faces black. He told me no, and that the movie was full of black people and rapper talk. Needless to say, he got the free rental, because I work at a place that excels in “customer service”. That is just wrong. Sure, I expect to be satisfied with the good and services provided for me, but there must be a limit… conscious and ethical limit to these customer services. If something a customer asks is just plain wrong, then a manager should have the right to say no, without the paralyzing fear of losing that customer. Is that making sense to anyone else?

5. Halloween Cards. I start and end up with a holiday grievance. Again, I love Halloween. It’s my favorite holiday. However, I don’t understand the point of Halloween cards. I get Christmas, Valentine, Anniversary, Birthday, Graduation, and other cards, but the existence of a Halloween card really baffles me. Think about it people… who wants a card for Halloween? No one! It’s not even a card worthy holiday! People want candy or something else. To be honest, the last thing I would want on Halloween, and I personally don’t know anyone who would want one. That, right there, is WHY it’s TRICK or treat. I guarantee someone got two things in his bag for Halloween… toilet paper and a Halloween card, and he looked at the toilet paper and finally began to notice the assortment of trees in that person’s front yard. In the mean time, his friend didn’t get TP and a card; rather, he got eggs and a card. Suddenly, the first friend was an outdoor decorator and the second wanted to work on his aim. Thus, the beginning of the tricks. I guarantee that that’s what really happened.

NOTE: I know the story behind Halloween, so don’t email me telling me that my theory is wrong. I was being facetious.

Well, it certainly feels good to vent. Phew! Anyway, I’m spent, so let’s wrap this up.

The Caboose

Well, four columns done and I am still here. Calvin must be nuts... or maybe I’m just catching on to ya’ll? Anyway, what did we learn today?

1. Give Jon Heidenreich a chance at least… then judge him unmercifully as much as your little hearts desire.

2. Stu Hart, again, Rest In Peace. Your passing hit a tone with us all.

3. Fuck Christmas, The Olsen Twins, under wrist Watches, Customer Service, and Halloween Cards

4. I am looking forward to seeing the proposed Japanese Mafia, and look for Ultimo Dragon’s role during this.

Alright guys, thanks for reading and as always, Feedback is appreciated, and remember, keep your heads high, keep standing up straight, keep reaching for that star... and for God sakes, don't drop the soap.

Da J-Train

merlinJAP@hotmail.com (If you email me, put FEEDBACK in the email subject or it will be deleted)

AIM: JPAW101…. Feel free to talk to me, I am friendly and give good hugs!

*NEW GALLERY* Photos of BATISTA With His HOT NEW GIRLFRIEND!

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