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Submitted by Wevv Mang on Sunday, September 21, 2003 at 2:05 AM EST
Ridin’ With The Bossman - The Payoff Greetings! Welcome to another edition of Ridin’ With The Bossman! It’s a PPV weekend, and you know what that means? Absolutely no predictions about the outcome what so ever! Yep, I don’t like making predictions, since I’d rather just watch the show. I’ll leave that to Davey Boy and his crystal ball. He went 100% last time, so it works. We have plenty to talk about without going into who’s going to win, and who’s not. Well, to be honest, I do have one prediction, and it’s that Goldberg will loose. At least, that was my line of thinking before Raw and some news tidbits. So let’s see what the WWE is up to this week. WWE TV - The TV Series Raw -Recap info by Dustin Tigue, Hardest Working Man In Recapping Christian and Jericho, The Real Show Stoppers A protest in the ring, that was some entertainment. I completely agree with them about Austin. Austin really isn’t helping things on Raw. I did like Jericho getting in Austin’s face with the sign. That was good. Since they don’t have matches at Unforgiven, they are given one. A #1 Contenders match tonight for the IC belt on Sunday. Hm. The IC belt gets the honor of having a #1 Contender, but the Big Belt doesn’t. Go figure. I didn’t like the fact that Jericho and Christian had to back down from Austin. An impasse would have been better, and then Austin should have had to the confidence to turn his back and walk out of the ring, while evil thoughts crossed Jericho’s mind. Prolong the feud, you know, instead of making one a coward right off the bat. RVD vs Jericho Quick match, nice work, standard ref bump and then Christian nails both with the belt. Austin emerges again, and makes the tile match a Three -Way. Why? Well, it’s not like people are flocking to see JR in action now, is it? I expect this match to go a looong time, since the rest of the card could be done in 5 minutes. At least I hope the rest only go that long. Goldberg Clips WOW, Vince actually dipped into the WCW archive and used footage. Amazing. 3 months too late, but still amazing that he would even go that far. What’s really amazing is if Vince had watched this footage back then, Goldberg would be a huge star right about now, instead of a guy sitting on the fence, ready to fall if the slightest change in fan temperament occurs. Rob Conway vs Spike Dudley Um, OK, that’s one way to to injure Spike for the PPV. I think last week’s bump would have done just fine, but now Spike can make a MIRACULOUS recovery and interfere in the match this Sunday. Moolah vs Victoria Well, Vince did promise her a match after her 80th birthday, and now she had one, so hopefully we will never see her again. It’s amazing that you and Mae were still wrestling, but I’d rather not have seen any of it. - Victoria does the job, and Randy comes out and does his best work to date. Very well done. - There is something worse on TV than seeing announcers wrestle, and it’s 80 year old women wrestling. I do respect Moolah for having a match at her age, but I don’t want to see it again for a looong time. Rodney Mack and Mark Henry vs Lance Storm and Goldust Still here? Lance Storm is trig out his his new gimmick. Mark Henry is called by JR "The most powerful, athletic 400 pound man in the business today!" Big Show takes offense to that. Mark Freakin Henry? Strongest, yes, most athletic? No. The man barely moves and wins by Goldust walking into him and getting thrown around. Workrate Reducing Sports Entertainment Michaels ends his solid promo by slapping Orton. Rosey calls some one and tells them his name is SHIT. Terri talks with Molly and Gail and we get the low down on the match, and confirmation that Gail did have sex with Bischoff. Nice moving segue into each bit. Gail and Molly vs Trish Not too bad a match. Both girls beat up Trish, and when about to finish her off, Lita returns and cleans house. The division gets even better looking. You now have five women, six if Jazz is ready, who either have talent and/or heat/ interest to make angles people will pay attention to. Too bad it’s in the hands of the Raw creative department. I’m sure Lita will become crazy at the PPV. Val Venis vs Test Coach and Al come out dressed like JR and King, only in a mocking fashion. They pull JR’s mics, and call this exciting match. Stacy helps Val win, interfering against Test. Test is upset, and starts to menace her, when Big Poppa Pump comes to the rescue. Test drags Stacy from the ring. Coach and Snow weren’t bad, having some nice heel moments. King vs Al Snow King wants a match, and Al accepts. Coach goes up to "help" JR and winds up being the target in a shooting gallery. Damn JR sounded pissed. Coach was stunned,a nd made a lame comeback. The action is never called, but King beats Al with a roll up. Coach leaves, and then comes back to whack JR. But he’s fine by the time the commercial break ends. Triple H’s Little Part Came out strong, quickly faded to silence. H couldn’t even get a Goldberg, one of the easiest chants in the world, going. That is sad. Ric and Randy weren’t with him, he was solo, and he bombed. Big Time. His manner was good, but the material was death. Confetti fell, balloons were realized, but the energy was gone. H’s mic went dead. The feed to the truck was still good, but the replay back to the house was dead. So that’s why the house mic came in. So the audience could hear what he had to say. Also, and added crowd noise from the truck could not be added in. Nope, the only feed after that was the mic for the crowd, and JR and King. Goldberg runs in, gives one Powerslam, and H is out, and the show ends. The last 10 minutes or so summed up H’s reign as champ very well. No one seems to care anymore. H seems to be a strong heel, but only when his opponent is strong. When he’s dominant, it just doesn’t have the same impact. He’s the David Spade of wrestling. The reign of H is a copy of the Iron Sheik's run, where he held the belt forever and folks come from miles around to see if he would get beat. Now, folks ain’t gonna pay squat, when they can be just as happy finding out that H won on the following nights free TV show, Raw. Times have changed. Smackdown There was only one reason to watch Smackdown this week. Sure, the rest of the show was solid, Eddie and Chavo getting the belts, Tajiri and Rhyno vs Benoit and Rey, but it was the Iron Man match that was the show. It was fantastic too. Nice use of strategy, and an emotional roller coaster. I thought they lost it at the half way point, but man, they cranked it up to 11 in the last few minutes. That was one hell of a match. I’ll call it a match of the year. It fit my bill. It was something new, had great emotion, solid work, and sucked me back in after I was ready to leave. And delivered in spades. Two guys who wanted to have a great match, and went out and did it. And ended it the best way for both guys. Bravo. Wevv’s House (Next To The Cemetery) Living room Bossman: OK gang, settle down. Now last week, we had a little problem with communication. Puppet, you were supposed to go into the NEW ENGLAND locker room and cause trouble. Not PHILLY’s. So this week, I’ve come up with this diagram, and given everyone specific instructions on where they’re going and what to do. Any questions? The large gaggle of midgets is still fidgeting on the coach and not paying very close attention. One little person raises his hand. Bossman: Yes, you there. Midget #1: Do I really have to spike Detroit’s gatorade? I mean, come on, this is Detroit we’re talking about here. Bossman:Stick to the plan. They beat Arizona pretty badly. Midget #2: HAHAHAHA! That was Arizona! I could beat Arizona! They totally suck! Bossman: SILENCE! You want some of this? Huh? Do ya?!?! That’s what I thought. Stick to the plan. Any other questions? Midget #3: I have one. Where’s Big Show and Wevv? Bossman: I have cleverly distracted them with a fiendish scheme. Midget #3: You sprang for ice cream didn’t you? Bossman: Yes, fiendish and clever. I asked them to pick me up some Gold Medal RIbbon, only there is no such flavor! They’ll be gone for hours! Midget #3: Uh, Boss, there is a Gold Medal Ribbon flavor. Bossman stops his evil chuckle midstream. Looks around, quickly composes himself and leaps into action. Bossman: Quickly! You all have your assignments, now get going! I’m not paying you to sit here! MOVE! Midget #4: We get paid? Bossman: SILENCE! MOVE IT! BEGONE MY MINIONS! Ah Bossman, I thought it was strange you offering to pay for something. But at least Big Show ain’t complaining, and his limo is comfy... Over-Analyzing Wrestling Today’s Topic: Can’t Forgive OK, I’ve been thinking about the PPV this weekend and trying to come up with some predictions. The funny thing is, I was basing my predications not on who the better wrestler was, or in terms of angles, but mainly on backstage power. That got me thinking about the situation of Raw and Smackdown and how really different the brands are. Not just in talent, but in planning. The current pattern for storylines on Raw is 4 weeks (if that) and out. Once the PPV is over, so are all current plans and it’s time to come up with something new. It’s something that has been talked about before, and probably will again, and soon. Now, it’s painfully obvious. Let’s take a look at the main event situation shall we? If H wins, who’s his next opponent? Anyone? Any one at all? There’s nobody. Granted, it’s a long six weeks for till the next PPV, but the champ gotta be on TV during that time. Now factor in that he’s injured and can’t physically wrestle. Oh, by the way, I fully expect H to win. Why? The WWE has said Goldberg was a disappointment, and to cap it off, he stole H’s spot in a movie. Goldberg is a WCW character, and always will be, and that is another reason Vince won’t give him the belt. If Goldberg wins, his next opponent is H, even if he doesn’t ever wrestle him until November, it will be H. So even if he wins, it’s like he didn’t. lots of "That’s my belt you’re holding" "Oh yeah, you’re right" type of dialog. The level between main event and midcard has also been firmly drawn again. I think some one noticed that Jericho had snuck back into their ranks again, and promptly set him back down to midcard. Consider this. The Highlight Reel is gone, he’s in a duel for the IC belt, the Forgotten TItle, and wrestling against RVD, who ain’t getting a push anytime soon. Just because it’s wrestling that you and I may enjoy, it’s not a push. Once they realize that folks are enjoying it too much, they’ll squash it by injecting it with Test. The tag team title is dead. It’s not even being defended at the PPV. That is just plain sad, but then again, if it was, and hanged hands, who they new champs face? Each other for the next six months. Of course, waiting in the wings is Rodney Mack and Mark Henry. Oo-FAH. The Woman’s Title is the best laid out angle on the card. It may not have the energy or entertainment value to most fans of Jericho/Christian/ RVD, but this one has been building for months, and has a lot of back story going into it. Go figure, the Forgotten Division is in the best shape. The announcers, well, it is a way to make the transition format he old guard to the new guard a little more exciting, and also bring some of the Monday regulars to watch heat. Now, if heat was watchable, and I could remember to turn it on, then it would be OK. It’s still on MTV isn’t it? That’s how much I care about Heat. Of course, if they don’t win, then it was all pointless. Correction, even more pointless. This is a match that could just as easily take place on TV and have the same effect. The only reason, and I do mean the only reason, it’s happening on a PPV is so that JR and King can get a PPV payoff on top of their pay for calling the matches. You know, this line up was really the best that the WWE could come up with. Seriously. It could just as easily have been Mae Young and Moolah having an honest to God match. Like 3 minutes of old ladies wrestling, and winning. The the next candidates for PPV airtime are Rodney and Mark. So, a slim chance of seeing some good wrestling vs a slim chance that the announcer fracas might be entertaining. I’ll take the announcers and pray it’s over quick. Actually, if I see JR get whomped, I’ll be satisfied. My expectations for this match are not high. The real frustration for me is that I look over at Smackdown, and see how it could be. Some one knows what the fudge their doing. It may not always be good, but it has a consistency that lasts beyond the crap. Is it the talent? Well, that helps, but the angles are generally better. The parts I don’t like I can point to and ignore, and focus on the rest of the show. I’ll go back to my analogy of " Smackdown was good, except for (blank), while Raw sucked except for (blank)" Two similar sounding views that couldn’t be more different. When it comes to contenders and angles, there is always some one ready to step up and fill a spot. Look at the World Title scene. Brock Lesnar is injured and may have to take some time off. Angle is in the same boat. Both have nagging injuries. If one of them goes out, they have a clear foe waiting in the wings. Undertaker is there, so is Big Show. Now, both have faced these opponent fairly recently, so if a decision is made to shake things up, there is a handful of options. There’s John Cena, who has a past with Taker, and has yet to face Show. Benoit could step up. If the WWE really wanted to shift things around, they could throw Haas in there, since he’s now without a partner. The Tag Titles are up in the air at the moment, but again, there are options. Chavo and Eddie can face off against the APA, though I’m not looking forward to it. But there is hope, in the form of Ultimo Dragon and Noble. The FBI could make a return. heck even Shannon Moore and Matt Hardy could step up. The US title also has a lot of contenders. Tajiri, Matt Hardy, Rhyno, and the list goes on. Same with the Cruiser belt. Lots of options, and the entire rooster has had some matches, and "unfinished business" that could be made into a feud. Not one wrestler has been buried beyond salvage. Even Sean O’Haire, though I hope he comes back with some pants and not just his Pervert Trenchcoat of Fun. Smackdown has so many possibilities for good wrestling, and there’s always a good chance that you’ll get something you like, and more importantly, the chance that you’ll sit through some crap to get it, because you WANT to see it. Unlike Raw where if you get up and step away from he TV, you’ll miss the part you wanted to see, and can only hope that it gets replayed on Heat. Of course then you have to sit through endless repeats of the Real World waiting for it to come on. Now, I know that Heat has been moved to TNT some time ago. It’s a joke. But Heat has completely dropped off my radar. I don’t feel like watching a replay of crap that I saw once already and didn’t like it then, why would I like it now? Unfortunately, it’s still what I’m getting in prime time. Well that’s all for today. I still have some random thoughts to throw out there, and Bossman is on the phone, so Show and I have to wait for him. I’d drive, but if we’re going to get pulled over, I don’t want to be the one behind the wheel. I’m just a victim. That’s the ticket. Overheard backstage "Hey Kev, how was your movie gig?" "Great, it was a lot of fun, but I’m looking forward to getting back to wrestling and those cushy paydays." "Well, we sure have some great things lined up for you. We have this one idea for you and Test. You’ll love it" Slaps Nash on the back. "AHHHH! My back! I think I threw a disc! Back on disability for me!" Failing to find anyone is Hollywood willing to give H a leading role, WWE has thrown out the plans for the movie division of WWE to create a Steve Austin movie and instead gone with a Triple H movie. Why am I not surprised? When’s that wedding? Word has begun leaking out about H’s bachelor party. I figured it would take two weeks or so, but the news is already out there. Not much. Yet. Most interesting thing I read was who arrived with H. Nash, Vince, Shane, and Taker. Folks not there, no excuses, Kane and RVD. I imagine that if Kane had shown up, Vince would have made him stay in kayfabe, and lighting the strip club on fire would have been bad thing. Also, dead chicks don’t give lap dances. Ready Bossman? FInish up, I’m up to the plugs. Show, go take care of things. I must say Show, you’re doing a great job as Vince’s henchman. Those tips from Bossman are working out. Mr. Tito come sin twice this week, in his usual excellent style. Check out his reviews. Wrath Of Tito(RAW) and Wrath Of Tito(Smackdown) Snapple makes a long awaited come back and does it twice in one week. My all time favorite quote of Snapple's? "Who says Kevin Nash isn’t funny? I laughed my ass off when he fell down in the ring and cried like a little girl." Not an exact quote but the wit behind it still lingers with me. I loved it. Wrestling In A Bottle - State of Raw Wrestling In A Bottle - Unforgiven and Ask Triple H Davey Boy checks in with his predictions for Unforgiven. read it now, and place your wagers accordingly. The Wrestling Menu Jim Forzese talks about the Real Alternative to wrestling. You know, I never thought of it that way. That’s why I love Jim’s work. The Forzese View The Phantom Lord checks in and Hypes Unforgiven, and bashes Mark Henry ( I caught it too, glad to see I wasn't the only one). How can you resist? The Rant Of The Week OK Bossman, let’s roll. We have to get to the bar for the PPV and also catch some football action. Come on Moss, work your magic! Until Next Time, Thanks For Reading And Go Cubs! Wevv " Don’t Blow It You Bastards, 100 Years is Long Enough!" Mang mrwevv@mac.com *NEW GALLERY* Must See! Torrie Wilson Out PARTYING HARD in the Clubs!
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