WWE SmackDown Results: 7/17/03 - Angle takes on Show/Haas/Benjamin
Submitted by Dustin Tingue on Thursday, July 17, 2003 at 10:34 PM EST



WWE SMACKDOWN! - 7/17/03

Location: Columbus, Ohio (taped 7/13)
Announcing: Michael Cole & Tazz

Vince McMahon hit the ring to begin the show and talked about people needing to learn their lessons. McMahon said Kurt Angle learned his lesson last week when he was barred from the ring during the handicap match with Brock Lesnar taking on the Big Show, Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin. McMahon told him if he interfered, he'd be fired. McMahon then booked Angle against Show, Haas and Benjamin and a three on one handicap match with falls count anywhere. Brock Lesnar interruped and stormed out to the ring. Lesnar confronted McMahon who warned him not to cross the boss. Lesnar said he didn't want to cross the boss, he wanted to beat the boss. Lesnar challenges Vince to a match and Vince accepts, but not for tonight. Vince said he wanted Lesnar to be at 100% since he knew his ribs were still hurting him from the chokeslam he took last week. Lesnar said he couldn't give Vince an F5, so he gave him an FU instead, (no, not Cena's finisher, FU as in... you get it).

Chris Benoit defeated Matt Hardy (with Shannon Moore) in a semi-final United States Title Tournament match. Moore got himself involved, only to have Benoit lay him out. Hardy escaped an early Crossface and came up with a bloody mouth. Hardy tried to pull a page out of Benoit's playbook and went for the swandive headbutt, but missed. Benoit took advantage and hit the three consecutive German suplexes but still couldn't put Hardy away. Hardy went up to the top where the two struggled and eventually both came down with Benoit locking in the Crossface which Hardy eventually tapped out to.

Backstage, Stephanie McMahon confronted Vince and wanted to know where Sable was. Vince told her he had Sable in a safe location, for Stephanie's sake. Before Stephanie left, Vince said Sable had a little something for her and he held up a bottle of Midol (PMS pills). Steph slapped the pills out of his hand and walked off.

Meanwhile, we saw Lesnar on his way out of the arena when Kurt Angle caught up to him to ask him where he was going. Lesnar explained the situation to him and compared it to Angle's similar situation last week. The two joked around and as Lesnar left, he told Angle to watch out for the chokeslam.

Jamie Noble and Nidia made their way to the ring and Noble grabbed a mic. He said he was out of line last week with his indecent proposal to Torrie Wilson. He said he got a little carried away and then offered to double his previous proposal. This caused Nidia to walk out on him. After that, Ultimo Dragon made his entrance.

Ultimo Dragon defeated Jamie Noble. Dragon took control from the start and hit the Asai moonsault but back in the ring, Noble attempted a tigerbomb when Billy Gunn and Torrie Wilson walked out. This distracted Noble long enough for Dragon to get a rollup into a nice bridge for the win.

We then saw a shot of a cemetary as John Cena walked into the picture. Cena rapped on the Undertaker and said he was a dead issue. He then proceeded to take a leak on a gravestone. Nice guy, that Cena.

Backstage in the arena, the APA were handing out fliers to their first annual barroom brawl set for Vengeance. They handed one to Spanky (who, for some reason or another, had a balloon hat on his head and a balloon animal to match). Spanky said he'd be there. Simmons and Bradshaw then invited Kanyon who said he couldn't make it because he was having his cable installed that day. Eventually, the APA got him to reschedule for that so he could make it to the brawl.

Rey Mysterio & Billy Kidman defeated Los Conquistadores. Mysterio and Kidman took on Conquistadores 45 and 47, according to Tazz. Nothing special here, Kidman scores the pinfall after a Shooting Star Press on uh, hell, who knows, who cares. Afterwards, Kidman seemed a little too excited about the win.

Once again, Vince swaggered out to the ring and revealed the "safe location" of Sable which was a skybox. We see Sable relaxing and sipping some wine. Vince then made mention of his sexual escapades with her and then John Cena came out to save the day. Cena cut another rap and insulted Zack Gowen quite a few times. He finished it up by saying they both had handicap matches at Vengeance. The Undertaker had heard enough so he wheeled on out. Vince bailed and Cena cut off Taker's trek around the ring by chucking the steps at him. Taker rolled into the ring, Cena stomped away but Taker landed the big boot and Cena took off.

Rhyno vs. Sean O'Haire was a no contest. The two brawled for 30 seconds and then fell to the outside. The APA's music fired up and they came out to hand out more fliers. That was productive.

Eddie Guerrero defeated Billy Gunn (with Torrie Wilson) in a semi-final United States Title Tournament match. Guerrero looked good as usual, Gunn was nothing special. Late in the match, Jamie Noble ran out with a chair in his hand. Guerrero then shoved Gunn into the ref, grabbed the chair, plastered Gunn and then laid down as if he was the one who got hit, that ruled. Guerrero slowly rolled over for the pin and then took off in a pimped out Coupe DeVille. I don't mean "pimped out" as in "tricked out," well, I mean, it was tricked out, but, they borrowed this one from a pimp, no doubt. Nice ride.

Up in the skybox, Josh Mathews tried to get a word with Sable who was asking for another glass of wine at the time. Stephanie then showed up dressed like a waitress and dumped the glass on Sable. The two then brawled with Sable tossing Steph on the food table. These chicks cannot act, or sell, or be entertaining. I'm usually never opinionated in my recaps but this segment gets my award for "Worst Segement of the Year." Horrible. Sable and Steph are only good for four things: titties. Anyway, some security guys eventually ran in to break it up. Oh yeah, Sable cracked Mathews across the face for no apparent reason. Ha. Take that, buddy.

Kurt Angle defeated The World's Greatest Tag Team & Big Show in a three on one falls count anywhere match. Angle dominated early and was able to hold his own for a little while but eventually the heels beat down Kurt pretty good. A lot of the match took place on the outside with a few nearfalls here and there. Towards the end, Zack Gowen ran in and took out Haas and Benjamin with dropkicks but then turned around into Show who threw him to the mat like a ragdoll. Back on the outside, the steps got involved again and were set up next to the announce table. Show went for a repeat but Gowen came back and jumped off the top, only to have Show catch him and drop him on the rails. This gave Angle enough time to grab the steps and clock Show with them and send him into the audience. In the ring, Haas held Angle as Benjamin wound up for the superkick but Angle ducked it, spun Benjamin around which led him into hitting his own partner with a spinning heel kick. Angle then caught Benajamin in the anklelock and got the win. Afterwards, Angle and Gowen celebrated as Show stared menacingly, and uh, drooled.

Feedback: dustin@wrestlingheadlines.com








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