WWE House Show Results from New Haven, Connecticut 8-26-02
    Submitted by Calvin Martin on Tuesday, August 27, 2002 at 12:42 AM EST


    Report by Steve Ellington AKA Nokturnal

    For the record, this was the final event EVER in the New Haven Coliseum.

    Show opens with an announcement and some great pyro.

    Tajiri vs. Funaki
    The match began with a posedown. Nobody cared. Back and forth offense between the two. A series of chokeholds applied by Tajiri. Boring match, crowd was absolutely dead. Tajiri defeats Funaki via Buzzsaw kick.
    Match Rating: 3/10

    Reverend D-Von vs. Randy Orton
    D-Von gets on the mic and calls all of us idiots. I nearly cried I was so hurt. Orton showed some great offense, and even a few high flying tricks. Again, a slow matchup, nice flying cross body reversal by D-Von into a rollup for the pin. They continue to brawl after the match, Orton gaining the upper hand.
    Match Rating: 5/10

    Hardcore Holly vs. Albert
    Knife edge slaps delivered to the chests of both men. Nice medium paced action, definitely delivering more to the crowd. Holly wins via Alabama slam, but to our disgust, after Holly exits the ring, Albert moons the crowd. God, I really did not need to see that. Funny though, the only thing that that man shaves onhis body is his ass.
    Match Rating: 7/10

    Batista vs. Bull Buchanan
    All I have to say about this match is that it gave me a chance to take a piss break and grab some pizza. Booooorinng! Send these two back to OVW PLEASE!
    Match Rating: 4/10

    Hurricane/Shannon Moore vs. Bitchy and Chick
    Actually I have nothing to say about this match except that it was good. Rico interfered, accidentally knocking out his style clients. He got the Doomsday Device for his troubles then we saw some classic Billy D-X taunting.
    Match Rating:8/10

    Chris Benoit vs. Rikishi
    SLOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!!! I'd have rather been watching grass grow. I guess Benoit did the best he could, but I just couldnt believe that Rikishi could take the Crippler Crossface for a full minute without tapping. He tapped 2 seconds after the second crossface was applied.
    Match Rating: 5/10

    Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie in a Bra and Panties Match w/ Special Guest referee Nidia
    I guess it was some ok action. Mostly just cheap jerk-off material. Torrie won, then continued to assault Nidia, which prompted an angered Jamie Noble to come out and get clotheslined not once, not twice, but THREE times before running away like a bitch. Are they trying to tell me that Hurricane can't beat this man while here Torrie is beating the living hell out of him? Puh-leeeeaase.
    Match Rating: 5/10

    Jamie Noble vs. Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guererro for Cruiserweight Title
    What can I say, Kidman looked amazing tonight. Reversals, high flying, he was smooth as silk in that ring. Damn shame he got pinned by Noble who used the ropes for assistance. Damn rollups.
    Match Rating: 8/10

    Matt Hardy vs. John Cena
    First Matt comes out to huge pop, Cena to....well...none. Then Matt gets on the mic and brags about how the people like him so much better than Cena. This angers Cena who lays the smackdown on Matt. Unfortunately a twist of fate put him out of his misery. This story has a good ending though, as Cena left to a huge pop.
    Match Rating:8/10

    Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle/Eddie Guererro
    Wow. That's all I have to say. Wow. There are two things you don't appreciate about Rey Mysterio unless you see him live. 1 is how fast he is. 2 is how short he is. Amazing action the entire match. And even some short jokes courtesy of Kurt Angle. Angle however gets speared by Edge for the easy pin.
    Match Rating:10/10

    The pleasure continues as Edge suggests that the Coliseum go out with a bang, so he and Rey should do a 5-second posedown from the E+C playbook. Rey agrees, but Angle comes out and suggests something even better. He suggest that each one imitate another wrestler's catch phrase. Eddie Guererro is first.

    Eddie: What you gonna do essa? What you gonna do when Latino Heat run wild on you?

    Kurt Angle: Lets try english this time buddy.

    Eddie imitates the Booker T spinerooni (no spin. damn).: Can you dig that HOOOOOOOMES!?!?

    Kurt Angle: That was good, but it still Kinda sucked.

    Rey Snatches the mic: I got a impression (bounces around the ring) You Suck! It's true, it's damn true.

    Angle chases Rey around the ring: Yeah well at least i have a catch phrase. Angle then does an impression of someone (couldnt understand over the What? chants) then Edge takes the mic.

    Edge does an impression of the Rock to enormous pop and then offers up a toast to Angle and Guererro.

    Edge: What do you say we toast the Coliseum off with a couple of brewskies?

    Angle:.....Got Milk?

    Edge: You know what, I'll just get you some water.

    Beers and water are tossed in the ring. They toast...and then Edge and Rey attack. Edge hits Angle with the Spear and Rey hits Guererro with the 619.

    Show rating: 9/10 simply put, it was an amazing main event.

    Biggest Pop:
    1)Edge with Rock impression
    2)Rey with multiple 619's
    3)Matt Hardy
    4)John Cena
    5)Bra and panties match

    Biggest Heat:
    1)Kurt Angle (obviously)
    2)Eddie Guererro
    3)Rico
    4)D-Von
    5)Everyone else got no reaction




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