WWF Smackdown Results 3-28-02
Submitted by Mick on Thursday, March 28, 2002 at 10:24 PM EST



WWF SMACKDOWN report for 3/28/02

Well, it's the final major WWF TV spectacle featuring the full roster...which probably won't sink in until I see the seperated roster. Thankfully I ended up with the stronger roster. Although I'm not the least bit happy about having the Rock or Hogan, I'm thrilled to death about having Benoit and Angle. I would like to have the nWo, but I guess I'll just have to read about them, as I go to BU and my rediculous amount of money doesn't buy me cable. Lucky me. One more note before the report begins, I'd like to thank Mr. Tito for his kind shout-out in last week's Phat Daily Column, which I highly suggest you all read daily.

Ok, "on with the chlorophyll!"


There will be no pre-show recap of RAW, as we go right into the Beautiful People....THE BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!!!! sorry, no sing-alongs.

Live from Philadelphia, PA.

Your announcers are Michael Cole (hopefully for the last time) and Jerry Lawler.

The main event: Hogan/Rock/Kane vs. the nWo is announced.

SUCKA!!!!!!!!!! Which is my way of saying that Booker T makes his way to the ring for singles competition to likely job to DDP in retribution for pinning him on RAW Monday.

Singles Competition: Booker T vs. Diamond Dallas Page
Booker starts off by working Page into the corner with the standard chops and kicks. Page gets up and throws Booker into the corner and does the same. Page with the irish whip, Booker reverses and catches Page in the teeth with a kick for a near fall. Page gets up and reverses an irish whip into a neckbraker. Booker recovers and goes for a scissor kick, but Page reverses and SITDOWN POWERBOMBS?! Booker T. Page eventually Diamond Cuts Booker, who has the wherewithall to get the hell out of the ring when Brock Lesnar hits and decimates DDP in typical Lesnar style (massive spinbuster and that awesome twisting press thing that I can't describe very well).
Winner due to Disqualification: Diamond Dallas Page

Note: during the match the WWF ran the draft crawl-line, bringing people up to speed on Monday's draft

{commercial}

Kurt Angle's music hits and the White Trash Chorus breaks out with a rousing rendition of "You Suck"

KURT: You know, considering that I risked my life wrestling in the Olympics with a broken frickin neck for you people, the least you could do is show a little appreciation. ANd you know what? You suck too! You people are pathetic! Almost as pathetic as what happened last Monday night on RAW when Stephanie McMahon was forced to leave the WWF. Oh you people like that? Why don't you have a little compassion? I thought this was supposed to be the City of Brotherly Love. Stephanie was like a blossoming flower, she brought joy and happiness to people every day. What I would like to do right now is take a moment of silence for the many wonderful memories she brought us and you people will show her the proper respect...starting now.
{picture of Stephanie sad is known}
You people are jerks, Stephanie if you're listening don't listen. You people show the respect that Stephanie deserves or I'll beat it out of you.

{Vince's music hits and he makes his way to the ring}

VINCE: First of all, you desecrate my daughter's name, that means you desecrate my name. Quite frankly my name is worth a hell of a lot more than all your names combined. In fact this entire fiasco wouldn't have happened if it hadn't been for one man, HHH. What a model citizen he is. First he seduces her, then he marries her, then he publicly embarrasses her and then last Monday he beats her up. HHH you're a son of a bitch. I admit my daughter wasn't ideal, but she was as close to ideal as you could possibly get. {Vince goes on to say that he's happy that HHH will be on both shows and that he will make HHH's life a living hell on Smackdown}

{HHH's music hits and he comes to the entranceway}

HHH: (one of the only HHH chants I've ever heard) Is that what you think Vince? You think that I'm a bad influence? You think that I'm selfish, that I'm rotten, that I'm horrible? That I'm a son of a bitch? Well let me set you straight, you ain't seen nothin yet. And I tell you what Vince, if you screw with me, I promise you, I will make YOUR LIFE a living hell. And, I'll tell you what, since you miss your precious daughter so much, maybe Kurt's right, we should honor Steph. No, no, she deserves it. Let's honor the last few remaining moments of Stephanie McMahon in the WWF.

{The end of RAW is shown with HHH pinning Stephanie and her being dragged away}

KURT: That's it, I've had it. I want a match with that big ape tonight, I don't even care if the title's on the line.

VINCE: You know what Kurt, under normal circumstances I'd be happy to oblige, but I want some of that ingrate myself.

HHH: You two want a shot at me? I don't care, I'll take you both. Game on.

VINCE: It'll be us vs. you in a handicapped match tonight.

{WHOOO, Flair's music}

FLAIR: Hey McMahon, did I hear you making the rules again? Tonight I'm still 50% whether you like it or not. And it's not gonna be a handicapped match, HHH the world champion is gonna have a partner tonight. And HHH, since this is my last Smackdown! And we are in Philadelphia, when I was a world champion I used to party here ALL NIGHT LONG. And I think tonight it should be HHH and the Nature Boy, side by side. Do me one favor, I'm gonna put everything I have into being right beside you. You keep Angle off me so I can kick Vince's ass all myself.

{commercial}

The Dudley's are shown talking about how it comes down to their match tonight. If they beat Billy and Chuck tonight, not only do they become WWF Champions, but they stay together as a team. It's been a hell of a run, but if it has to end, where better place than right here, good old hardcore Philadelphia. We've been WCW Tag Team Champions, 8 time ECW Tag Team Champions and WWF Tag Team Champions.

{Billy and Chuck come out....get it?}

WWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: Dudley Boyz vs. Billy and Chuck(c) w/Rico
Bubba and Chuck start off. Chuck works Bubba into the corner, but Bubba turns the tables. (get it?....sorry) Bubba whips Chuck into the ropes and hits a dropkick?! D'von comes in and double teams Chuck, much to his delight. D'von comes as Chuck tags Billy and D'Von runs house on Gunn. Lots of jumping attacks, flying forearms clotheslines and spinning elbows from D'Von in what has to be a bid for a singles push. D'Von tags in Bubba and Billy tags in Chuck. Suplex from Bubba to Billy, then a DDT and a nearfall on Chuck. Bubba bomb to Chuck and he heads out fo the ring. Rico holds up D'Von on the top rope as Chuck goes for the superplex. Bubba comes from behind and they do the Doomsday Device. D'Von heads out of the ring after Rico but Billy comes in and hits the Fame Asser on Bubba for the pin. D'Von comes back as Chuck and Billy dispense beatings, but the Dudleys reverse for the 3D on Chuck and then the Wazzzup Flying Ball Bite from D'Von. Then it's "D'VON GET THE TABLE!!!" And for some nostalgia as the fans chant ECW! (I love Philly crowds) MASSIVE 3D through the table on Billy Gunn for what may have been the last time.
Winner and STILL Tag Team Champions: Chuck and Billy...because there is no God

After the carnage the 'greatest tag team of all time' the Dudleys embrace.


The APA are shown playing cards. Faarooq said it didn't seem the same playing cards, now that they would be separated. They said they'd always be 'brothers'. THey decided to go in the same way they came out, drinking beer. Then they saw Tajiri and Torrie and called them over and told Tajiri to tell everyone they were throwing a big party. Torrie went to leave but they told her to stay and play strip poker, she agreed and they happily dealt her in.

Lilian interviews Matt Hardy and Lita. She congratulates both on ending up on RAW. Lita said it felt great to be Flair's 10th draft pick, and she was thrilled to still be with Team Xtreme. Matt said he was thrilled too. Jericho comes over and says that they make him sick, it should be about him. He should be on both shows because he should be the champion. Matt said he could understand why Jericho was unhappy, since nobody wanted to be a has-been. As Matt and Lita walked away, Jericho attacked the two, and screamed that he was not a has-been!


Hogan is shown as Rock comes in. They talk about how it is the very last night they have a shot at whooping the nWo. Hogan talks about how they have a partner Kane. Kane scares the hell out of Hogan, can he be trusted? Rock says don't worry, he aint King Kong Bundy and he aint Kamala. Rocks says Kane is a big ass kicking machine. Kane enters. Rock asks if he's ready to kick ass. Kane asks Rock if he's ready. Rock says that...KANE SCREAMS THAT IT DOESN'T MATTER IF ROCK IS READY!! Kane proceeds to cut the longest promo of his career. Ripping off Rock and Hogan's catchphrases and movements in what has to be the most awkwardly funny thing I've ever seen in my life.



Stacker 2's Burn of the Night is a recap of the match from RAW where Kane interfered and beat up the nWo.

Six-Man Tag: Hogan/Rock/?Kane? vs. nWo (Nash, Hall, X-pac)
Rock and X-Pac start. Rock starts it with a big shoulder block and a pair of arm drag takedowns. After an escape by X-Pac, Rock catches a moving X-Pac in an overhead belly to belly suplex for a near fall. X-Pac tags in Hall. Rock works Hall into the corner and clotheslines him as he emerges for a nearfall. Hall catches Rock in motion and hits the fallaway slam for a nearfall. He then tags in Nash. Nash fights Rocks into the corner. Rock fights back and Nash tags Hall back in. Hall and Rock trade punches, irish whip, spinebuster by Rock and both men go down. Rock tags in Hogan who clears the ring of the entire nWo. Big boot and the leg drop to Hall. Nash breaks up the pinfall. Nash comes in and hits a big sideslam on Hogan for a nearfall. X-Pac is tagged in and he lights up Hogan with a vengence. Hall comes in and hits Hogan with a sleeper hold. Hogan goes nighty-night for the two count but then, GASP, he Hulks Up and fights out of the sleeper into a back suplex. Both men down, Hogan crawls toward his cornerand tags in Kane who goes right to the top and hits the flying clotesline on Hall, the tilt-a-whirl slam on X-Pac and knocks Nash down. Nash comes in and boots Kane into the corner. X-Pac goes for the Bronco Buster, but Kane catches him and chokeslams him for the pin.
Winner Via Pinfall: Kane/Hogan/Rock


{Commercial}

Chris Jericho vs. Matt Hardy w/Lita
They start off full tilt punch for punch, jumping clothesline. Matt then catches Jericho trying to dropkick and slingshots him. Hardy to the 2nd rope for the JUMPING LEG DROP OF DOOM. Jericho gets up and catches up and catches Hardy going top rope and puts him in the tree of woe. Lita then hits Jericho with the huricanranna. Too fast to commentate. Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho, Hardy kicks him away into the ropes where he nails Lita, who has just come to the apron. Jericho heads back toward Hardy who goes for the Twist of Fate, but the ref is tending to Lita, so Jericho low blows him and puts him in the Walls of Jericho and he taps.
Winner via Sumbmission: Chris Jericho

As Jericho heads for the back, he spots Lita and puts her in the Walls as well.


The APA's party is shown. They are all reminiscing and playing poker. Tajiri wins and Torrie takes off a belt, much to Bradshaw's disappointment. Christian HILARIOUSLY flips out because he was one card away from a royal flush while Faarooq ends it with a "Damn!"

{Commercial}

RVD comes out with his obligatory new tights for a title match with Test. Why God why?

INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP: Rob Van Dam (c) vs. Test
Test with the early advantage catching RVD off the top rope, but RVD escapes and kicks him in the teeth. Test practically no-sells and goes for a meltdown like powerslam after catching another kick attempt. Amidst a bunch of back-forth offense Test argues with Hebner periodically. Test goes for the near-fall with his foot on the ropes. No luck, RVD up top and he goes for the sunset flip, but Test holds onto the ropes. Hebner does a leaping kick and knocks Test's arms off the ropes. RVD gets the nearfall. Test fights him down and stalks Hebner. RVD hits a huge sunset flip and Hebner gives Test a quick count for the pin.
Winner and STILL Intercontinental Champion: Rob Van Dam

{commercial}

RAVEN!!! is shown. He is interviewed by Coach about being drafted and his opportunity at the Hardcore Title. Raven says what he wrestles for is not as important as who he wrestles for. Maven's passion will be his Waterloo courtesy of "the Raven Effect."

HARDCORE CHAMPIONSHIP: Maven (c) vs. Raven
Maven baseball slides Raven outside the ring as Raven brings trash cans in. Raven fights into the ring and smacks Maven around with a pair of trash can lids. Maven takes control back with a lid of his own and then does the crotch lift with the broom handle on Raven. Raven flips Maven out of the ring but he comes back, heading to the top. Maven hits a missle drop kick. Tommy Dreamer comes in with ref and a cookie sheet and fights Maven. Maven fights Dreamer away, but Raven gives him the drop-toe-hold onto a chair and then hits the Evenflow/Raven Effect for the pin and victory.
Winner and NEW Hardcore Champion: Raven


Vince is shown bitching about losing the Hardcore Championship. He's not gonna lose Stone Cold to RAW. Angle talks about hearing a rumor that Austin would be at RAW. Vince says he'll be there as well to bring him to Smackdown then. The two talk about how their victory will be an 'Olympic moment'.

{commercial}

They run down the entire Draft, lottery and all.

The APA's party is shown as the Hurricane chugs a beer to chants of "Hero" Regal comes over and says that "isn't this pleasant". Regal brags that he predicted that the APA would be out of business. Bradshaw says they are out of business and they are out of beer as well. So that's the end of the party. They then grab Regal and kick his ass, along with a few others. They congratulate each other on a hell of a run and joke that they went out the same way they came in. They then head out of their door and slowly turn the "Open for business" sign over to say "Sorry, We're Closed" They shake hands and wish each other luck and part ways in a very well done spot by the WWF.

{commercial}


Well Vince is three times my age and three times as jacked....I'm incredibly ashamed. But seeing Ric Flair's loose skin hang over his belt makes me feel a little bit better about myself. Anyway......

MAIN EVENT: Tag Team Match: Vince and Kurt Angle vs. Ric Flair and Triple H
Vince and HHH start. HHH tags in Flair instead. Vince tags in Angle. Flair does the fake grapple and strokes his hair back. Classic. They tie up, Flair with the eye poke he then lights up Kurt with some chops and tags in HHH. HHH works Kurt into the corner with a series of low kicks. Irish whip, reversed but HHH boots the advancing Angle and Angle catches him with an overhead suplex. HHH takes the advantage back and struts around like Flair and then tags Ric in. Angle hits a high angle back drop on Flair and starts working on his knee. Angle tags in Vince. Vince works on Flairs knee as Flair tries to fight back, but it's no good. HHH tries to advance on Vince, but it just allows Flair and Angle to double team. Vince wraps Flair's knee around the ringpost and heads back into the ring. Vince goes for the Figure Four, but Flair kicks him away and chops him. Vince escapes and tags in Angle. Angle knocks HHH off the apron and goes for a german suplex, but Flair gives him the back boot to the crotch. He goes for the figure four, but Angle reverses into the Anklelock. HHH breaks it up, but the ref forces him out and Angle tags in Vince. Vince puts Flair in the figure four, but Flair reverses the pressure only to have the hold broken by Angle. McMahon tags in Angle, Flair tags in HHH. HHH hits a neckbraker and then a big spinebuster. McMahon tries to break up a nearfall but Flair fights him out. HHH goes for the Pedigree, but the ref is helping Flair back to the corner. McMahon comes in with the WWF title and nails HHH. Two count. HHH climbs back up as Vince is tagged in and Vince gives him the double axe handle. HHH back up with a clothesline and tags in Flair who GOES TOP ROPE?! and hits a single axe handle?!? Flair takes control of McMahon as Angle hits the ring only to be ejected by HHH. Flair goes for the figure four as the Undertaker hits the ring with the big boot and puts Vince on top of Flair for the pin.
Winner via pinfall: Vince and Angle

And that's it, the end of the full WWF.


COMMENTARY: Excellent drama involved in the splitting of the Dudleys and the APA, especially the APA. Terrible decision having Billy and Chuck put the Dudleys out in Philly. I know they had no choice, it just doesn't seem right. They really REALLY need to let Paul Heyman talk SOON, but other than that Brock Lesnar continues to be superb. Let's hope that we can leave Stephanie out of sight and out of mind next week. And, honestly, I'm PISSED that the nWo aren't on the same show as Hogan, because I REALLY wanted that feud between X-Pac and Hogan, but no such luck. Raven looks good and I'm happy to see that he and Dreamer are going to be feuding. I hope they continue to push Maven, but I'm glad to see him out of the hardcore division. Hopefully with Raven taking the title to RAW he and all the ECW guys there can make it a worthwhile title again...unlike the damn European Title...what a waste of gold. The Main Event should have been a more symbollic event, seeing as how this was the last gasp of the full WWF, but eh...


Love me, Hate me? You know you do.
Mick
chrismc@bu.edu
http://www.lswrestling.cjb.net








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