Wayne's World: Tender Loving Care while fighting with Tables Ladders & Chairs
Dec 16, 2012 - 11:05:29 PM
Welcome back one and all to a column that knows first-hand what it feels like to be proud of their children for receiving end-of-year awards at school, my name is Wayne and you are now entering my world. Now as you all may have seen by now I don’t normally do the traditional route when it comes to PPV preview and prediction columns, normally I let my King of Stats alter-ego take over and do a column known as the pre-PPV Analysis. Well not every month I am able to do that due to time constraints, certain match types, feelings of repetition or just plain lack of motivation to go to that much trouble, so I do not do every PPV that is presented for our viewing pleasure.
In saying that I still want to get my opinions over too you the readers, as that is why you all keep coming back to read my columns in the first place. So since I had decided not to do the analysis this month I decided that I will however try for the first time a more traditional approach. However being who I am I had to make this column a little different from the rest so I decided to invite a special guest along to share their thoughts as well. That special guest is my 10-year old son Zachery. The members of the CF have labelled Zac as the youngest Smark of the forums due to the knowledge he has gained through his conversations with me over the years.
The way this will work is that I will give my opinion of the match and then Zac will give you his. After that we will have three predictions marked down for you, What Zac Wants, What Wayne wants and What will happen (what we believe the WWE will do). I apologise if Zac’s answers are a little small this time as I sort of sprang this on him and he only had limited time before bed to write his part up for me. Also to let you all know these are Zac’s words but I have tidied up the grammar so that it is easier for you all to read. Well let’s get this show on the road shall we?
Wow a Diva’s Battle Royal, geez I am really excited to see this, I really can’t wait for this poorly booked, over acted waste of time. I’m sorry but I believe that the feminine version of the mass participant match is the worst regularly appearing match in wrestling history (I won’t say the worst ever while things like “Viagra on a Pole” still exist in wrestling’s past). A Battle Royal can be a poorly done match on most occasions due to the amount of bodies in the ring in one time and this is with guys who can actually wrestle. The majority of the Diva’s in a Battle Royal are incapable of putting on anything resembling a good match at the best of times; chucking a multitude of them in the ring at the same time is a recipe for disaster.
When I heard that this match was announced I looked through the names involved and instantly I signalled out AJ for the win. That however changed pretty quickly when I saw that AJ was pulled from this match and replaced by the Funkadactyls, two women who I see with little chance of winning this match. Really the only people I see with a chance of winning this match are Layla, Kaitlyn and Tamina. However the Diva I would like to see win is Natalya as I have made my opinion known of what I think about non-wrestlers holding a title belt and seeing Natalya being named number 1 contender will see the move to take the belt off of Eve, well hopefully it will anyway.
This pre-show match is a waste of time. Layla will win this match because I think she deserves the title back. There is not really much else I can say about this match, sorry but as I said, it is a waste of time.
What Zac wants: Layla
What Wayne wants: Natalya
What will happen: Tamina
It is good to see the Tag Division flourishing once again, with these two teams helping lead the way. I was slow on warming to The Rhodes Scholars originally due to my view of Cody being a future world champion, seeing a tag team as a step backwards for him. However now that I know that they are just not another flash in the pan team and are actually sticking around for a while I have let that bias fall behind me. By combining these two together it has actually helped further both of their pushes towards the main event and solidified them both as hot prospects for the future. A run with the titles has to be in their near future as no other team is more deserving of getting the strap.
While I state that no other team deserves the strap more than Team Rhodes Scholars I would love to see the belt on their opponents in this match. It doesn’t matter what you call them, Team 6-1-Botch, The Masked Mexicans or my personal favourite Team Car-Sterio, I will have to admit that they are the highlight of the division for me. Rey’s teaming with Sin Cara has seemed to rejuvenate his career and his influence on Cara has seen a marked improvement in him. It may be due to my lifelong love of Rey Mysterio but I would love to see them get the win.
This is going to be one of the best matches for me because my two favourite superstars, Rey and Sin Cara, are in it. I think their athletic ability will be enough to see them beat The Rhodes Scholars.
What Zac wants: Rey & Sin Cara
What Wayne wants: Rey & Sin Cara
What will happen: The Rhodes Scholars
Of all the matches on the Main Card this is the one that I am least looking forward too. While I have heard all about the star that Cesaro could be I am yet to really see it myself. While he is getting better every week and I am slowly coming around he has a long way to go before I can really get behind him. However in saying that I do not want to see the title taken off him at the moment, especially by R-Truth. While I enjoy Truth’s work, I would have preferred to see someone more capable of putting on an entertaining match face Cesaro on PPV and leave this match to Raw or Smackdown.
This won’t be a very big match compared to the others on the card. I want R-Truth to win because I absolutely hate Cesaro but I just know that Cesaro is going to keep the title.
What Zac wants: R-Truth
What Wayne wants: Antonio Cesaro
What will happen: Antonio Cesaro
I am really torn on what I would like to see happen in this match. I would like to see both of these guys move out of this division and move into the main event scene but I also realise how much both of them need to have a good run in it for now to help them reach that point. Kofi finds himself holding one of the mid card championships every couple of months and if he doesn’t break free of it soon he may find it to be his downfall in the WWE. While I am happy to see him holding a title I think it is a feeling of same old, same old, when seeing him either having or competing for a midcard title.
Wade on the other hand has not had much time around a belt and a decent run with a strap could be all he needs to move back into the main event spot he was gifted back in his Nexus days. His first run with the belt was more of a transitional stage and it would be good to see what him and his Barrage could do with a decent crack at being champion.
This match is going to be pretty good for me as one of my favourite superstars Kofi Kingston is in it. I respect Wade a lot as he is a good wrestler, there is not a bad thing you can say about him, I just think Kofi will win as I don’t think they will take the title of him just yet.
What Zac wants: Kofi Kingston
What Wayne wants: Wade Barrett
What will happen: Kofi Kingston
So here we have it once again Sheamus v Big Show for the World Heavyweight Championship, this time with Chairs legal just to make it different. To say I was bored of this match-up a couple of months ago would be an understatement so don’t feel bad if I say that this match-up does nothing for me. I was over Sheamus run with the title months ago due to his booking as a face when all of his actions were that of a heel so there is no way I would like to see him as champion again right now. While I don’t want to see Show as champion either he should keep the title so he can lose it against a different opponent.
This match will be a slaughter match, a total demolition brawl. I think Big Show will win because no matter how hard Sheamus’s Brogue Kick is whenever Big Show gets a hold of a chair someone’s getting hurt.
What Zac wants: The Big Show
What Wayne wants: The Big Show
What will happen: The Big Show
Anyone who has read a majority of my columns knows that I am a major Cena fan and for a long time there I was not a fan of Ziggler. I used to write the same thing in most of my columns when writing about Ziggler, I respect his ability but I just not get into him. While I have come around a lot this year, I still have a long way to go before I can call myself a big fan. This has to be the most interesting match of the night for me though as I just have no idea where they will go with it and because of the mixed emotions it brings out in me.
I said it earlier in the year at the Money in the Bank PPV and I will say it again now, John Cena has no right to hold the briefcase, he has no need of it, all he has to do is ask and a title shot will be his. However he has had the briefcase before and he looks like a lock to do it again. While I don’t subscribe to Tito’s buried belief a loss to Cena here could once again stall Ziggler’s rise to the top. I think that the WWE realise this and will do the opposite by giving him that big time rub that doesn’t come along very often, a clean win over Cena. Really this is what I want to see happen as this will help push Ziggler to the main event and when he cashes in at Wrestlemania like I believe he will, he will be a top flight main eventer. There is this nagging itch at the back of my head though that says this is WWE we are talking about and everything I just said will be the exact opposite.
I guess this match was just put together to give John Cena something to do on the PPV. The fact that it is for the briefcase is lame. Cena is one of the biggest names in the WWE but I don’t think he should have even got the first briefcase let alone hold both briefcases in the same year. While I don’t like Ziggler he should win as I hate Cena more.
What Zac wants: Dolph Ziggler
What Wayne wants: Dolph Ziggler
What will happen: John Cena
I am actually looking forward to this match more than I was for the original one between Punk and Ryback. That first match had me just doing the motions waiting for how they were going to screw Ryback this time. When Punk got injured, or should I say was kayfabe injured so he could have necessary surgery so he was 100% for The Rock in January, and this match got announced I was relieved as this was a more intriguing dynamic for me.
On one side you have 3 of the top 5 stars of this year going up against 3 very talented newcomers who could very well be the stars of the coming years. While I would love to see Ryback and Team Hell No get the win in all honesty that will be a silly move. TNA has shown us over the last couple of months what a momentum killer having your invading stable lose constantly on PPV can do and even with all the copying of them the WWE is doing at the moment (hey is this match not now a Full Metal Mayhem match since it is won by pinfall?), this is not something I want to see repeated here. By having The Shield manhandled by Ryback and Kane it will stunt them in their tracks. They need to get a win here and while Ryback is off limits to pin, a clean win over Kane could do them a load of good.
I think this TLC match is a very smart way to replace the Ryback v Punk match since Punk is out injured. My pick to win is Ryback and Team Hell No, why, well because The Shield is not ready to beat a team of such big names. Yeah they are good and all that but not good enough yet.
What Zac wants: Ryback & Hell No
What Wayne wants: The Shield
What will happen: The Shield
In the end I think this will be a reasonably good PPV, especially after the lacklustre affairs that the WWE and TNA PPV’s have been of late. It has enough happening that I am actually anticipating the PPV and hopefully it delivers. Before I go I would like to ask what you the readers thought of this format, will you like for me to continue doing it for the months that I do not do my pre-PPV Analysis or would you prefer me to chuck it onto the scrapheap and move onto something else? Anyway that’s all we have time for now, see you all again next time.
Thanx for reading,
Wayne & Zachery Little
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