1. Being a wrestling fan is more than just watching the WWE.
While reading Fact or Fiction this week, it struck me how few of the guys writing their opinions about this issue either hadn't seen Austin Aries perform or hadn't seen him perform for four years. Are you kidding me? He's the Ring of Honor World Champion, he's on television weekly, whether wrestling or cutting a promo. If you don't get HDNet, there's always youtube. There are ways of finding out who the guys you keep hearing about are.
I honestly don't know how in this day and age someone can consider himself a wrestling fan when he doesn't explore the various options. When I was in college years ago, I tried in vain at local video outlets, etc., to find Japanese wrestling tapes, independent wrestling tapes, etc. I knew it would be expensive, but I sought them out anyway just to try to see what else was out there partly because WCW had their joint shows with New Japan and partly because of magazines like Pro Wrestling Illustrated writing great things about wrestlers such as Mitsuharu Misawa and Kenta Kobashi.
As a wrestling fan, I didn't just want to hear about the exploits of other wrestlers or get a brief glimpse of what that other wrestling culture was like; I wanted to watch at least a few shows to give it a shot. As I said, I was unable to do so, but I at least made an attempt. When WCW folded, even as poorly as it was run, I was sad because I was losing hours of wrestling each week and down to only one promotion instead of two.
Then in 2002, both Ring of Honor and NWATNA started up and there were choices again. Ring of Honor wasn't televised nationally, but NWATNA was on a PPV basis, and I jumped on it as soon as I could. Was the WWE great at the time? No, no it wasn't, and that gave me some incentive to try another alternative, but here's the thing: the WWE is doing pretty damn good the last few months, but they weren't great for about two years.
So, what stopped you? Are you really unaware of all the alternatives available to you, or do you just not have wherewithal to bother? Yes, the WWE is easy to access because they have a regular schedule, but that doesn't inherently make them the best organzization; it just makes them the most rich and popular. Sure, we live in a democracy, but that doesn't mean the general populous are intelligent.
If you're really satisfied with what the WWE offers you on a weekly basis, do nothing except sit back on the couch and watch their poor attempts at being funny sandwiched with 5 to 10 minute wrestling matches on RAW, or--if you even get MyTV--watch the greatness that is Smackdown with lots of commercial interruptions and ads for their program that tries desperately to be the "A" show and fails weekly. Just be aware there's more out there.
If, however, you want to see some great professional wrestling, go on youtube and see what you can find, log on to rohwrestling.com and look at the selection there; if you want some help choosing something great, shoot me an email. Hell, there's even lots out there available to torrent if you know where to look. If you're content being a sports entertainment fan, more power to you, but if you are a wrestling fan, take a leap, man! You'll be glad you did.
2. Austin Aries is the best independent wrestler in the world.
Last night marked the end of the tenures of both Bryan Danielson and Nigel McGuinness in Ring of Honor. Actually, it didn't. Saturday night they faced each other in their final match, but since is the thought I sat down to write yesterday before my fingers took over, I thought we'd just pretend that I wrote these two in reverse order. So one is two and two is one. How does that sound? Probably not too good to you math majors out there and a little confusing to the rest of you, but they're still both things I think I think.
Anyway, getting on to the point of today's entry, it makes no difference whether Nigel or Dragon are signed to the WWE or not; Austin Aries has been the best independent wrestler for a couple of years now. Yeah, I know, "American Dragon" Bryan Danielson is often referred to as the best in the world, and that's chanted before each of his matches. Big deal. The crowd also chants, "You're gonna get your fuckin' head kicked in!" to his opponent, do you think that they really wish the fella harm? No, he's great, but not the greatest.
I don't subscribe to the theory that you can't be the best wrestler in the world because you don't work for the WWE anymore than I subscribe to the fact that the match of the year has to come from there. I know a lot of you think that Ric Flair's retirement match against Shawn Michaels was the best match of 2008, whereas I know it wasn't even the best match on the card. For the record, the best match I saw last year was the dog collar match between Austin Aries and Jimmy Jacobs. The Michaels/Jericho unsanctioned match was a close second.
This year, I watched live as Michaels again had the match of the year in the WWE against The Undertaker at Wrestlemania, but I say again to you that it wasn't the best match in wrestling that fucking weekend. The honor belongs to KENTA defending his Global Honor Crown Lightheavyweight Championship against Davey Richards in a tremendous match that you can download by clicking here. That really takes nothing away from Michaels who still appears to be the class of the wrestling world when it comes to being a total package.
"Appears" being the key word. About a year ago, my return to writing columns here was marked with a three part series in which I evaluated various wrestlers and ended up concluding that Shawn Michaels was the best in the world. I can no longer draw that conclusion based upon what I've seen this year. He hasn't fallen too far off the pace, but there are a couple of guys ahead of him, and Austin Aries, the old #2, has definitely pulled into the lead by being possibly the greatest man who ever lived.
For those of you who don't know, and, again, shame on you if you don't but you can start rectifying that situation by clicking here, and watching some episodes of ROH on HDNET, this is one of the ways in which Aries refers to himself. A-Double has switched up his gimmick since the end of last year. Instead of doing a quick turn, he started reacting in matches when the crowd started to turn on him for doing the "same old shit," and turned it around in his favor, using his patented moves in such a way that it pissed off the audience and got him over as the top heel.
It didn't hurt that he started being more arrogant than ever, while acting tough and wearing striped pink tights with a weird smile. The dude really took the cake, though, last week on ROH when he had his A-double, L-double(Lucky Lottery) to give someone a shot at the title. Anybody who's been watching wrestling longer than a year knew who the eventual opponent would be, but that didn't stop him from first drawing the name of and calling out Kenny Omega--a future superstar who wasn't even in the building----and ripping on him for blowing his opportunity.
Austin Aries can do anything he wants to when it comes to professional wrestling. No, he can't bodyslam the Big Show, but who the hell would want to? The guy can talk, can wrestle, can sell, can fly, and gets the crowd to react with venemous hate within seconds of entering the ringside area. He's easily the best independent wrestler in the world right now, and you can take the "independent" label off of that any time. ROH will definitely miss Nigel and Dragon, but there's no doubt they left the organization in good hands--after all, they might belong to the greatest man who ever lived.
3. I remember when Legacy was a serious threat.
How could I not? Wasn't that just about 14 hours ago? Seriously. What the fuck was that? Look, RAW itself was nearly as bad as last week, even a match that I've read some say should have been on the upcoming Pay Per View was really a piece of shit, but nothing on the show was worse than what was done to Randy Orton and his two sidekicks. When I say "nothing on the show," keep in mind that they continued the Hornswoggle/Chavo farce and showed Alicia Fox's mug.
Other things that were terrible on the show included pretty much any segment in which Reverend Al Sharpton was involved and Julian Hall's singing, but as bad as all of this was, it pales in comparison to the abomination that was the booking of the two Hell in a Cell matches. Let's start at the end of the show. How could anyone in the world possibly believe that Randy Orton has a chance to win the WWE Title back this Sunday? I've wanted to order this PPV since I first heard about it, but now even I'm wavering.
I don't want to be; I want to be enthused about watching the satanic structure used, but I'm not. How can I be after what happened last night? How can you? How can anybody who saw that show? John Cena got his ass kicked. He was trapped in a boston crab by Chris Jericho for what seemed like an eternity, but was probably something like 90 seconds, with Jericho finally breaking the hold when he saw his partner coming down to the ring. After this, Big Show pounded Cena's back mercilessly for awhile and then he was double-teamed.
Yet, when Randy Orton got in the ring to face him, all of a sudden Cena was feeling no pain at all. Earlier in the night, Degeneration X--who we'll get to in a moment--said that they were like the Incredible Hulk, but Cena was the one who went from mild mannered, beaten down, nearly crippled man to suddenly be able to magically lower the Cell down, jump on The Viper and stop him from slithering away, and then climb with the speed of the Flash up the cage after his quarry, finally hurling him onto the top of the cage with the F-U.
Earlier in the night, Randy Orton's stablemates, Cody Rhodes and Ted Dibiase were talking trash in the ring about their upcoming Hell in a Cell match against DX, stating that they wouldn't be the ones locked in with DX, Degeneration X were going to be the ones locked in with them. But, all of a sudden when Michaels and Triple H make their way to the ring to physically confront them, Rhodes and Dibiase turn tail and run like cowards. It was fucking ridiculous. It's time for this Legacy bullshit to end; because it just ain't working.
Most of the time, heels should be booked to be weaker than their face counterparts; to have to cheat to win. I get that, but this is something else entirely. Throughout the feud against first Triple H and then the reunited DX, Rhodes and Dibiase have shown courage, commitment, and determination in this feud. They have been brutal, they have been nearly unstoppable, they've been tremendous, and they've become superstars. They've fought DX with their every breath, and they've tortured them like Randy Orton tortured Cena.
Yet now, six days before the biggest match in the careers of Rhodes and Dibiase; six days before Randy Orton gets his final shot at the WWE Title, these three men who have been vicious as all get out are all of a sudden going to run away? Going to become weaklings? Going to basically just lay down and die? I don't buy it. It's bad storytelling. I'm sure they're banking that people will tune in just to see these three villains get their asses whipped. I don't share their confidence. They're basically telling us the conclusion is foregone; that being the case, what's the point in watching anything more than the highlights?
The Smackdown side of the show doesn't seem to make much sense, either, but at least I get to see my two favorites in the organization perform against each other in the steel structure. At least it makes sense that Batista is teaming with Mysterio and that Mysterio is going up against his rival, Jericho in battles of evenly matched teams. So, I guess what I'm saying is that I'll probably still end up ordering the event for that, but I'm no longer expecting much from the RAW side that's been so great the last two months. It's a tremendous feat of booking to destroy in one show two feuds that have taken months to culminate.
4. These battles of the giants get so boring.
Not necessarily the fights themselves, mind you, but the frequency with which they try to shove them down our throats lately. What was the worst match at Wrestlemania XXIV? Easily Batista vs. Umaga, and those guys aren't really even that big comparably, though they definitely are still considered to be "hosses." Batista almost ended "Aumaga"'s, as he's now called, career right then and there by fucking up a powerbomb. Why? Was there actually somebody that thought people would pay money to see that match?
The first mega event I ever watched was Wrestlemania III. From what I normally see, the two matches that most people remember from that event are Ricky Steamboat vs. Randy Savage for the Intercontinental Title and Hulk Hogan defending the WWF Title against Andre The Giant. While I don't think there's any question that it was the latter that drew in the fans--after all, it was hyped to be a colossal battle--the match that is considered a classic, and one of the best matches of all time, is Steamboat/Savage.
At the time, though, battles like this were relatively rare. Sure, the previous Mania had featured a grudge cage match between Hogan and King Kong Bundy, and there'd also been the Big John Studd $10,000 bodyslam challenge that Andre won, but still, the order of the day at that time was wrestlers wrestling, not huge bodybuilders trying to be the "first guy" to bodyslam someone. While not exactly commonplace today, these giants have certainly become less rare than they were and I don't think it's such awe to see them fight anymore.
That doesn't mean they should never happen, just that they aren't quite the spectacle they used to be, so they aren't going to sell events like they once did unless there's a great storyline behind it. Granted, Hogan/Andre had a pretty damned good story going for it, as well, but I really don't think that's what sold the event; I think it was more the atmosphere and wanting to see two guys of that side get it on that made the general public want to "be a part of" and buy their way to seeing the event.
That's no longer the case, as evidenced by the ratings the WWE are pulling in--or were pulling in before starting their celebrity guest host thing. I was one of the few that enjoyed both the Kane/Khali matches on the last two pay per views, and while I can't deny that it took up a spot that could have gone to younger, better wrestlers and even to another title being defended, you can't deny that it also provided variety as compared to the other matches that were on display those nights and added a ring to McMahon's circus philosophy.
I still think this idea is used too often, though. I have nothing against the idea of "hosses" in general, but that doesn't mean that I think that they should constantly be pitted against each other. Kane vs. Khali was entertaining, but generally these guys should be used to put over smaller guys that can actually wrestle and, you know, draw money for the organization. It's amazing to me that they're not used in such a manner. Sure, David vs. Goliath has been done before, but it's still infinitely more compelling than seeing two mastodons battle it out for what normally amounts to no reason at all.
This week on RAW, the first match on the show was MVPWSM vs. JeriShow, and while it's certainly true that MVP has been really showing a lack of confidence and direction lately, I have to wonder if Cole and Lawler believed and/or could smell the shit they were shoveling when they were awed by the match-up between Mark Henry and The Big Show. It's nothing we haven't seen before, and it didn't impress me at all. Both guys do a great job on their own, but they need to be in the ring with guys that accentuate their strengths and hide their weaknesses; not mirror images of themselves. That's no fun at all and it certainly isn't entertainment.
5. I don't really care that Hell's Gate is now "100% legal."
In yesterday's thought, I mentioned that both Mark Henry and The Big Show do great on their own, because they do. They're not meant to go out there and put on a mat wrestling clinic like Bret Hart or Kurt Angle. They're not supposed to fly around the ring like Evan Bourne or Rey Mysterio. They're not entertaining gangstas like too many people are in the WWE nowadays. They aren't meant to be the human bump machines that Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, and Christian are. Their job is to be big, strong, unstoppable monsters who throw others around.
If you got into a fight with one of these guys in real life, what do you think the chances are that you'd last two minutes, much less win? Assuming we're talking straight-up, man to man, with no weapons for either party, I'd say you have less than 1% chance of that happening, because these guys are beasts. They're fucking huge, and no amount of martial arts training in the world is going to help you overcome their sheer size and strength advantage. You can put Kane and The Great Khali in the same category.
Of course, the preeminent big man wrestler of all-time belongs there, as well, in the form of The Undertaker. The Undertaker has been called by announcers the best striker of all time, which is possible, and he's definitely adapted his style over the years more than anybody else I can think of, but to me his claim to fame--aside from his fantastic winning streak at Wrestlemania, of course--is that he is the greatest big man of all time. Yes, I place him above Andre The Giant. Andre was great in his time, but Taker has surpassed him. Sue me.
The Undertaker's career is littered with monsters he has faced and destroyed, whether at Mania or no--Kevin Nash, Kane, Underfaker, Mabel, Giant Gonzales, and on and on. No matter the size of his opponent, it seemed that he was always able to hoist them up into position and deliver their tombstone right then and there. As he got older and his opponents stayed relatively the same size, he started using a choke slam to polish them off. Then as times changed along with his gimmick, he added a new power finishing move; The Last Ride.
CM Punk is a different kind of monster. The Cookie Monster as some call him? No. He's the best kind, the subtle kind; the kind that believes in the way he lives his life and that his way is the only way. If you don't live your life the way Punk lives his--the way he thinks you should live yours--then you're doing things the wrong way and he's going to destroy the examples that he feels you are following in order to show you that they are weaker and wrong. He's so pure in body that he can't see that his spirit is flawed. Does Taker want to send him to hell?
Perhaps, butHell's Gate was a maneuver that The Undertaker started using because his strength was deserting him and because other men--his brother, Kane, and The Big Show, specifically--were using the chokeslam as their finishers. His was still a lethal set-up move, but it could no longer be a de facto finisher, so in order to have a weapon to defeat such big men as The Big Show and The Great Khali with in these latter years, he adapted the gogoplata from the worlds of judo and MMA. A guy with his strength and size shouldn't have to use it all the time.
As evidenced by both of their televised matches, Taker can throw CM Punk around with ease. He's choke-tossed Punk over the top-rope twice, causing Punk to show fear he's never shown before. Does Hell's Gate add to The Undertaker's arsenal? I suppose so, overall. Does he need it against Punk? Absolutely not. The Tombstone and The Last Ride are more than enough. This whole thing is an unnecessary ruse that takes away from what should have been an epic story and feud. They need to get the focus back where it belongs: on the combatants.
6. I have absolutely no interest in Smackdown's 10th Anniversary Special.
Yeah, I said it. No interest. While you guys are watching this quote-unquote extravaganza tonight, I'll either be watching Dollhouse or getting a nap in before starting work tonight. Yeah, it's true, I wouldn't be watching it anyway thanks to MyTV not being available in my area, but every week I log on to wwe.com to watch Smackdown over the weekend, and nearly every weekend end up logging on to youtube to watch a "pirated" version of it instead because the WWE are too damned slow about getting it up.
Not this time, though. I won't be watching it at all. I'm sure some of you have read the latest ETA, in which BeyondKnight and I debate our respective feelings on the Rock, and I'm glad he at least came in to do a one time appearance on what used to be his show. I even look forward to a possible hosting stint for him on Monday Night RAW, but a brief promo by him doesn't give me an incentive to watch what's sure to be a clusterfuck, revisionist history of an anniversary broadcast.
They are also, of course, bringing in the person that was the best heel in the business for about a year--and this person isn't even a wrestler, mind you--to do a tribute to her late husband, Eddie Guerrero. I have gone on the record--assuming anybody ever keeps this stuff on file somewhere--many times saying that at the time of his death Eddie Guerrero was both the best wrestler in the world and was going to win the World Title that night on Smackdown, so it's very fitting that he be honored, but here's a thought: what about his best friend?
I know I'm in the minority here and most of you feel that he shouldn't be honored. After all, he's a murderer, but not only that, he's a child murderer! Don't get me wrong, I get all that, and I can even understand why they wouldn't want to honor him for his in-ring achievements due to the actions he took on the final weekend of his life, but to not acknowledge him at all goes against what Vince McMahon himself said they were going to do, which is to not erase him from history but to not promote him.
Chris Benoit did exist, he did participate in some of the best matches in the history of Smackdown, and some of those moments should be shown both on tonight's show and on the dvd. I understand the poor taste involved in the making of a new dvd for Benoit, and can even support the decision not to, as much as I'd like to be able to buy one. However, we're talking about just a few minutes--seconds even--of showing one thing that made Smackdown great. To pretend Benoit wasn't a part of it is dishonest and since their "100 greatest moments" is a sham, I won't put any money or time into the dvd, either.
The same holds true for others that are no longer with the WWE. While I know clips of their IronMan match are on the dvd, I highly doubt there's even a passing mention of Kurt Angle or Brock Lesnar on the show tonight, or even Booker T who had one of the most memorable altercations of all time with Steve Austin, a great best of 5 feud with John Cena, and reigned over the brand as both King and World Heavyweight Champion. This deception is not only fraudulent, it's insulting to me as a wrestling fan.
So, no, I won't be watching Smackdown this week and I'll be content knowing that it's a good use of my time not doing so. It only firms up my resolve that the announced main event for the show not only includes RAW superstars when they should be doing everything they can to keep the brands separate, but also puts CM Punk on the same team of the three men still in the organization that cost him his first World Heavyweight Championship. I guess it makes about as much sense as everything else they've aired in the last seven days.
7. Total Nonstop Articulation needs a new voice.
It turned out to be a shitty morning in more ways than one. I got super busy at work this morning and ended up getting off ten minutes late. My wife and kids were supposed to be leaving around the time I was scheduled to get done with work, but it turns out that I would have been home to see them had I got done on time, because they got delayed by some ridiculous extended family drama.
So, I arrive home about 9:30 a.m. and it's just me and the dogs. I let the dogs out of their respective holding areas, check my email, and lay down on the couch to watch the Impact! I recorded from Thursday night and not 5 minutes later, my daughters puppy starts pissing on the floor. So, I take her out and then throw her back in her kennel and in a now doubly annoyed state of mind, lie down in another attempt to watch Impact!
It's actually become not a bad little show, lately, but I was a bit concerned last week when there was the scuffle between the Main Event Mafia and World Elite, because the only thing that seems likely to turn off fans more than a heel vs. heel feud would be a heel stable vs. heel stable feud, so I kind of wanted to watch to see where they picked up the threads of that developing situation.
There was a little bit of a verbal altercation between the two sides and then I managed to doze off during the Knockouts Title match. When I woke back up, Michele's dumb dog was whining to be let out of the cage and it turned out that she had crapped in there and stepped in it, leaving yours truly to take her out--again--and give her a shower. You can't imagine how happy I was with both the little bitch and the dog right then. Kidding, kidding. I love my little girl to death.
So, anyway, that unpleasantness out of the way, I laid down to watch more of TNA's lovely wrestling show and while the fight between the World Elite and Main Event Mafia rages on and the crowd appears to be as confused and disinterested as one would think when they have no idea what's going on, who to cheer for, and why the fuck they should give a crap either way, I suddenly realize that this isn't the thing that's annoying me the most.
I never was a huge Don West fan, but I thought he was okay when TNA first started and he was wearing those bright, silky, gaudy uni-colored shirt and tie combos. After all, he was excited about the product and you really had to admire the enthusiasm he brought to each broadcast. Over time, though, it was obvious that he wasn't very good at his color job and many people called for him to lose it; I have to admit I was one of them.
That changed, though, when he made a heel turn a few months back. All of a sudden listening to a TNA broadcast was more interesting than watching it. Now, though, that's changed again, because West has been "promoted" and we've got Taz somehow forgetting how to be the entertaining voice of Smackdown he'd been forever. Something's very wrong when the best part of your commentary is done by Mike Tenay.
Somewhere along the line, Taz went from being the very qualified, astute, and antagonistic analyst that he was to the docile jokester that now exists, and it's happened very quickly. He wasn't this guy when he was "coaching" Samoa Joe and I don't even think he was like this upon his TNA broadcast debut. I don't know what the hell happened here, but he needs to get that fire back and start doing the job he was brought in there to do.
The wrestling product put out by Total Nonstop Action is changing for the better overall. Some changes are subtle, others are large, but there's no doubt that there's a shift going on, and the guys that sit in the booth need to be up to the job of letting us know about it. If this new, laid-back, laughing fool is Taz's idea, it's a bad one, and somebody needs to reign him in. If he's changed under orders from management, that manager should be fired, and the Taz that did color in the WWE would be among the first to say so.
