My Two Centsss - Who's The Anonymous Wrestler That's Trolling The Internet?
By Super Chrisss
Feb 8, 2014 - 1:37:14 PM
(Tom Jenner is the man!)
It's an interesting time to be a card-carrying member of the Internet Wrestling Community. From watching the internet explode after Daniel Bryan was snubbed from competing in the Royal Rumble match two Sundays ago (in favour of Batista, no less), to all the changes going on both in TNA Wrestling, to the non-stop "updates" on CM Punk leaving WWE, sometimes it's been more fun to check websites like Lords of Pain everyday than to endure episodes of Monday Night Raw. But if that wasn't enough to gossip about, many members of the IWC have been losing their mind over not one, but two anonymous letters that have been delivered to F4WOnline.com by a "top WWE star". Some are laughing at these letters, others are calling it a work, others are questioning whether these letters are actually from a WWE star, and if so...who?
Well, that's my job to figure out. After scrutinizing both of these letters top to bottom, shaking my head at the multiple grammar and spelling mistakes contained in both (who still doesn't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'?), and asking myself why anyone would be bothered to establish contact with WWE's hated audience, the IWC, I have narrowed it down to five possible suspects. In no particular order, here are the accused:
Suspect #1: Ryback
Who could forget that weekend when "The Big Guy" took to Twitter and - for lack of a better term - went stark raving mad. He was posting tweets like, "Just got stopped by the police...I was released..." and, "I just had my last match...tonight in Montreal". I can't quote him perfectly because he just deleted all his tweets a few hours earlier, something he continues to do to this day. At first, people had no idea what to think. Was Ryback on the verge of being released and using Twitter as an outlet for his rage? Was he trolling the internet? Or was he just out of his mind? It turns out the latter is the most likely explanation, but ever since his Twitter rants, Ryback has added a new taunt to his arsenal - pretending to type like a "keyboard warrior". There's a strong possibility that Ryback is in fact behind these letters (since it would tie in perfectly with his "internet troll" gimmick), as he definitely seems like the type to go on this sort of rant.
Suspect #2: The Miz
Here's a guy I haven't seen too many people name-drop yet - has he really become that irrelevant? Because when you stop and think about it, there's a lot of evidence to suggest that the former WWE champion and Wrestlemania main-eventer could be the one responsible for these letters. After all, The Miz has always been out-spoken, and just last Monday on Raw, he had people wondering what the hell was going on when he ran out during the Ryder/O'Neil match, grabbed a headset, and basically buried both guys. Remember people, Miz is still supposed to be a face, but at this point, I don't think even Miz knows whether he's supposed to be a villain or a hero anymore. What made me suspect The Miz as being the anonymous poster was what he said in the second letter, how he doesn't think Punk could handle being the face of the company - the intensified travel schedule, making all the media appearances, etc. Miz has stated multiple times in the past how he wants to be that guy, and you can't blame him for being frustrated over how far he's fallen since Wrestlemania 27. Then again, calling The Miz a "top star" in 2014 is a bit of a stretch...
Suspect #3: Batista
When the first anonymous letter started making the round, the newly-returned Animal was the prime suspect. After all, the author was upset over the fan reaction at the Royal Rumble and tried to defend WWE's booking decisions. You know who else - besides WWE officials - who was bothered by Pittsburgh's reaction? Batista. He figured he would be greeted to a 'welcome back' ovation from the crowd, and he would have them supporting him as he faced off with Roman Reigns in the closing minutes. Instead, the crowd was solidly behind Reigns as soon as they realized that Daniel Bryan wasn't in the match and Punk was eliminated. Batista was so upset that as soon as the cameras stopped rolling, he was caught flipping off the fans, getting into arguments with people at ringside, and even mocked the 'Yes!' chant. Not very professional for someone who's supposed to be a babyface and knew he was returning to the same PG era that he couldn't stand four years earlier. Batista's temper tantrum made me respect John Cena even more, because he's been treated a hundred times worse by many crowds over the years, yet Cena never lost his cool the way Batista did. So yeah, it would not surprise me at all if Big Dave is the anonymous poster (it certainly sounds like the kind of language he would use, that's for sure).
Suspect #4: Curtis Axel
This might seem like a 'random' accusation, but Axel is known for being quick-tempered on the internet. Who could forget the Twitter war between him and Konnan? Most people, but it was pretty amusing, as Konnan basically ripped him for being, well, terrible, and Axel responded in the most childish manner. It was like watching a car crash, except in this case, no one really cared. The point is, don't put it past the son of Mr. Perfect to lash out on the internet in an inappropriate way (much like his tag team partner, ironically enough). I could just imagine Axel typing away at these letters, calling everyone out - Punk, HHH, the internet, you name it. Also, in the second letter, the poster spends a lot of time dissing Punk and using the word 'bitch' over and over. For some reason, that just screams Axel having a meltdown and blasting his two cents for what they're worth. There's no way Axel is a top star (frankly, I'm surprised he's still getting TV time, and hasn't been booted back to Superstars), but I could honestly see someone in his position going on this type of rant.
Suspect #5: It's Nobody!
This theory goes back to what I said in one of my articles a few weeks ago, and fellow columnist Oliver was alluding to in his column the other day - that there's something amiss in today's era of wrestling. It just seems rather odd that after years of blatantly ignoring the dirt-sheets, WWE has recently started issuing 'official statements' to websites like F4WOnline and PWInsider and now we get two anonymous letters in less than two weeks. What's going on here? How do we know that these statements and letters are actually real? Maybe this is simply the dirt-sheets' way of taking us on a ride, considering how hot-headed most of us are right now over the Daniel Bryan snub at the Rumble, and the hot topic which is Punk's shocking departure. Maybe this is simply their way of getting even more hits. After all, it's not like we have access to their sources or emails - all we see is text that has been copied and pasted for our viewing pleasure. We have no way of knowing whether this is the WWE screwing with us, or if it's the dirt-sheets that are to blame. The reason why this list isn't in order from 'most likely to least likely' is because there's just as much chance of Batista being the culprit as it is The Miz or even nobody at all. we just don't know.
All things considered, if I was a betting man, I would probably guess it was a midcarder who's behind these letters. Maybe Axel, maybe Miz, maybe even someone you wouldn't expect like a Kofi Kingston or a Dolph Ziggler. Keep in mind, those guys travel as much as Punk does, aren't buddies with Triple H, and like Punk, are being shafted for the third Wrestlemania season in a row in favour of part-timers coming in and taking 'their spots'. But at the same time, it would not surprise me if these letters are completely fictional, either. It's like the old saying goes, "don't believe everything you read on the internet!"
Before I go, I would like to share with you an email I received a few days ago from a long-time reader. Don't worry, it's not an anonymous letter (his name is Hashim) - just a viewer who's upset with the product and wishes to vent his frustrations with all of you. I share many of his beliefs, so listen to this:
Dear WWE Creative Team and Vincent Kennedy McMahon,
I write this to you as an ex fan of wrestling. I have watched WWE for the last 14 years and have followed the company almost religiously (reading results, using YouTube and on the odd occasion staying up until 4 am to catch Raw live - I stay in the UK you see) for the last 7 years.
I am the type of fan where if I support something I support it properly - 100% and no less. I have ordered pay per views and on the odd occasion bought WWE Merchandise. Mainly CM Punk t-shirts etc - not because he is necessarily my all time favourite but because they look cool.
I might not be your ideal fan in terms of personal financial expenditure. But what I am is the type of fan you do not want to lose. I am the type of fan who sticks up for wrestling when people call it sad and fake. I'm the type of fan who has actually got people into wrestling through my unrivalled passion. When you can take someone who does not believe in something or wants to watch something and you can persuade them into watching it - that is the type of fan you want watching your product.
This is not intended to be a rant or a bashing for the sake it, as I have stuck with WWE through thick and thin. I was there during Katie Vick, I was there during Wrestlemania 27 and I was there for the silly guest hosts who could not pronounce the names of superstars.
Yet I stood by and defended you guys. When people bashed Wrestlemania 27 I did my best to defend it saying that it was so cool how Dwayne Johnson aka The Rock was hosting the event, when the reality was I did not care for his return.
Which leads me to one of the many points as to why I am no longer a fan.
In 2011, CM Punk cut the best promo of all time. He spoke about how it made him sick that The Rock was main eventing Wrestlemania. That right there - that is part of the issue.
Less than two weeks ago a superstar named Dave Batista returns. I was confident he would not win the Royal Rumble because after all, Chris Jericho returned vowed to win the Rumble but lost. I was so sure that you had been listening to the deafening Daniel Bryan chants all Summer long and you would finally give him the push he deserved.
But I was wrong. This upset me however, it did not take me to my limit. Brock Lesnar and The Rock returned but did not get rewarded the main event of Wrestlemania and a Royal Rumble win right off the bat.
My problem is that wrestling has become stale. You had two main event superstars emerge in Batista and John Cena in 2004/5.
10 years later these two are still being prominently featured. Where are the new stars to attract me to watching?
When I grew up the main event scene was constantly changing. We had Triple H's reign of terror for 2 years but otherwise we saw new sparks. A boat load of talent from WCW and a strong mid card meant that the main event scene appeared fresh. You had HHH, Jericho, Angle, Benoit, Austin, The Rock, Taker, Kane, Big Show, Booker T and many more.
Come 2008 - 2011 we had a rotation again.
Jeff Hardy, CM Punk, Jericho, Undertaker, Swagger, Edge, Del Rio, Michaels, Batista, Orton, Cena, HHH. Sure enough they may not have all been successful but they were able to put on good matches.
Come 2014 who do we have?
Batista, Orton, Cena.. And part time wrestlers. Bryan has flirted but he has not been pushed as the others before him have. I would include Punk but reports point to him being done.
My point is that no new stars have been really created. You had the chance to create the next Stone Cold in Daniel Bryan but yet you refused to do so. I am a believer that you, the WWE creative team have a firm understanding of what you are doing.
At Summerslam when Bryan lost the World title to Orton I understood the booking behind it. I understood that a new heel stable had been created and I was interested in seeing what would happen next. What happened next was beat down after beat down after put down after put down. I grew tired but yet continued to believe that you had things under control.
Fast forward 7 months and my patience was on its final legs. I believed in my heart that Bryan would enter the Rumble and win it. Instead a breathless Batista returned and proceeded to get booed out of the building. Can you imagine if Austin had been messed around like this? We would have not had the rise of the third greatest (popularity, merchandise sales and drawing ability) superstar (Hogan or Cena - either of them you can put number 1 or 2). When you have an arena chant someone's name then you would assume that the common sense and logic would be to make them your champion? Of course that would be too simple.
Yet I kept my faith that was until I read about CM Punk has walked out on the WWE. This was the straw that officially broke the camel's back. It was not so much that CM Punk is my favourite superstar but more the fact that the only real 'new' star of the last 5 years has left. I just cannot stomach sitting through Batista, Orton and Cena for the next few weeks. I will browse the results of Raw but no longer will I be the passionate fan that I have been.
I do not intend to buy Wrestlemania unless the championship match will be something other than Batista/Orton for the 23402340 time. I have read that Extreme Rules emanates from Seattle Washington - if this is the case and Bryan is wrestling for the championship I will be ordering that pay-per-view to support him. If however you mess that up - which is impossible for you to get wrong (But hey! you never know! You got the Rumble wrong - Doh!) then I will be finished forever.
Thanks for the memories and the moments we have shared. I have just become too fed up of a too lazy booking/creative team.
A former devoted fan.
Not bad, eh? Thanks for sharing, Hashim!
Your Two Centsss: Who do you think is behind these anonymous letters?
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