"It's just another Monday, and I'm chillin.."
Hustle's Monday Morning Mayhem - Money In The Bank
Jul 15, 2013 - 9:14:08 AM
Writer's Note: I'm going to give you two LoP Radio links here. The first link is last night's Money In The Bank Post-Show, which saw some heated discussions, including me saying things about John Cena that you never, ever thought you'd hear me say. The second link is a link to today's upcoming (depending on when you read this, that is, as the show takes place at 3pm EST) show, which is going to be very interesting. You've seen "What If.." columns from me in the past, as well as from writers like Tito and Super Chrisss, but now, "What If.." comes to LoP Radio. In the debut episode, I'm joined by Repo and De to look at "What if.. Chris Benoit didn't go all Chris Benoit in the final week of his life?" We look at how everything would/could/should have been different, from the WWE product to the wrestling world, as a whole, to Benoit's life, and everything in between. It's sure to have a controversial tone, as most things Benoit-related do in this day and age. Be sure to join us live, or check it out in the archives when we're done.
Ten Things I Think I Think
1. Even though the person I predicted didn't win the World Title Money In The Bank, things are still intriguing moving forward. Yes, I picked Antonio Cesaro to win. Yes, I would have been happy with Dean Ambrose winning instead. However, with Damien Sandow owning the briefcase, and with the way he got it, things could be interesting in the near future. If you missed it, Cody Rhodes was climbing to the top of the ladder, and it looked like he was about to win, when Sandow, who had been hiding outside of the ring for several minutes, ran into the ring, yanked Rhodes off the ladder, and grabbed the briefcase for himself. This seems to have turned Cody face, and the Philadelphia crowd giving Cody a standing ovation and "Co-dy, Co-dy" chants off-camera after he stole the show during the match seems to push that even further. Also during the match, we got Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns running to the ring to help Dean Ambrose win, only to have The Usos run out to stop them, meaning that particular feud is still going on, after what was a very entertaining pre-show match. Back to the original point, though.. I'm interested to see how a Cody Rhodes face run goes, and the split of Rhodes Scholars should provide some interesting television for a while, giving Sandow something to do, in the event that he doesn't cash-in anytime soon. I don't think he's "ready" to be the World Champion, so a feud with Cody could be just the thing he needs to help boost his profile a bit.
2. I don't ever want to see Curtis Axel and The Miz face each other again. There's no chemistry. I simply don't give a fuck. Fuck is looking for me, and I am nowhere to be found. No. Just no. I'll say it again.. no. The Miz needs to go far, far away and never return. Axel still has a chance to be a successful midcard performer, as long as WWE keeps him far away from a microphone and allows Paul Heyman to do his job with Axel. This shit with The Miz needs to stop, and it needs to stop soon. He gave up a long time ago, and people have responded in kind. I might just give him the "Nobody Cares, B" Hussy Award this year, because I can.
3. AJ Lee continues to show why she was my choice for pro wrestling's Half-Year MVP. She's still doing everything in her power to make people care about the Divas Division, and it's succeeding with a lot of people, many of whom hate women's wrestling, making it a bit of a miracle. With her second straight victory over Kaitlyn, common sense would indicate that AJ will be moving on, and even further common sense would say that AJ's next opponent will be Kaitlyn's friend, Layla. This is fine with me, for two reasons. First, it will be fun to look at both of them together. Two, Layla is a better wrestler than Kaitlyn, and if they have half as much in-ring chemistry as AJ and Kaitlyn do, that could lead to some more entertaining matches. You really can't ask for much more than that with the Divas, can you?
4. Even in a win, Ryback really has fallen a long way. Remember when Ryback was main eventing? Remember when Ryback looked like he was absolutely, positively going to be the next WWE Champion? Remember when he looked like an unstoppable monster? Seems like it was years ago, doesn't it? He has gone from all that, to literally crying in his matches to quit and take losses by forfeit, to winning a pay-per-view match via roll-up. Who the fuck does WWE think he is? Kelly Kelly? At least the rumor is still that Vickie Guerrero is going to be his manager/valet/girlfriend/sex slave/whatever the company is planning for them, which means he won't need to cut promos anymore (but probably will, anyway), but damn, he has fallen a long, long way in a short, short period of time. I'm not sure if he can be "fixed" in the eyes of the WWE Universe, after what they have watched and how they've had to see him fall the way he has. Shit, he might as well go back to being Skip Sheffield again.
5. The ending of the World Title match was one of the year's dumbest, and it seriously hurt what was a really good match. The match was moving along very nicely, with plenty of believable near falls, and a crowd that was into it from the beginning. Things were going great.. and then we got the ending. AJ, who had come out to ringside during the match, decided she had seen enough of Dolph Ziggler getting hit, so she jumped into the ring and hit Alberto Del Rio with the Divas Title.. right in front of the ref. AJ's character is something of a Cerebral Assassin, for lack of a better term, always thinking and always trying to be one step ahead of everyone, but with this ending, she came across as looking very dumb. I know, I know.. there's a catch. It could very well lead to her revealing that she did it on purpose. That's fine and all, but damn, what a dumb ending. We would have been better off with a ref bump, followed by AJ trying to hit Del Rio with the title. As Del Rio moved out of the way, AJ's title would be smashed into Dolph's face. I get that the ending would be odd for a face to lose in such a fashion, but you're trying to drive a stake between Dolph and AJ without making anyone look like a doofus. We'll see where this goes, I guess.
6. John Cena is poisoning the WWE product. I'll have a column coming about this subject very soon, more than likely, but for now, I want everyone to listen to LoP Radio's MITB Post-Show to hear my very angry and passionate rant about everything that is happening with Cena and WWE. In my rant (there were two rants, actually), I said numerous things that I never thought I'd say. It's a must-listen. Trust me.
7. I'll say this again.. WWE pretty much screwed Christian over by botching his return in such a way. Out with an injury? Fine. Taking a while to return from said injury? Fine. Being cleared to return from said injury, only to have nothing to do, and be forced to sit on the shelf waiting.. and waiting.. and waiting? That's when it started going downhill. Finally bringing him back in such a lame "I have a special guest, and it's this guy.." way? A giant kick in the gonads. The return was met with crowd indifference, and every time we've seen him since then has also been met with crowd indifference. Maybe he just needs something different. Maybe he needs a heel turn. Maybe he needs to go back in time and team with Edge again. Maybe he needs to return to TNA. Maybe it's just time to retire. Whatever it is, he needs something to change, because this isn't working for him, and that's unfortunate, as he's still a really good worker, capable of solid matches with just about anyone. The buzz is merely gone, that's all.
8. I nearly flipped my laptop table over when Curtis Axel came out to prevent Daniel Bryan from winning the WWE Title Money In The Bank match. I don't need to get too in-depth here. Everyone knows how I feel. Everyone knows I think WWE has a bit of a countdown running down with Daniel Bryan, and if he isn't given the WWE Title by the time the NFL returns to take its throne as the king of all sports and sports-related things, I think the company will be surprised to see how many people tune out and never tune back in. People have been growing fed up with the WWE product for a while now, and this might very well be their final chance to win over the portion of their fan base that aren't huge football fans and who aren't guaranteed to "jump ship" once the season begins. There's one pay-per-view left on the WWE schedule before Monday Night Football returns, and.. that pay-per-view looks like it could feature Daniel Bryan facing Curtis Axel for the Intercontinental Title. That's not the title victory that is going to help keep viewers around, and there isn't even an guarantee that he'd win the damn thing. Things aren't looking good right now, but let's wait and see what happens. We could get Bryan beating Axel in a non-title match on Raw, allowing him to move on to bigger and better things. You know, since John Cena might have an opening on his dance card after disposing of Mark Henry.
9. I guess the company trusts Randy Orton again. In my Money In The Bank predictions column, I mentioned that it has been nearly two years since Orton has had any sort of title, and he's been running in place ever since, outside of a Wellness Policy suspension and a brief hiatus because of a concussion. The overall feeling was that his jogging in place had to do with Management not trusting him anymore, due to all of his out-of-the-ring jibberyjoo. Well, now that he's the WWE Title Money In The Bank briefcase holder, it would appear that trust has returned, if it was ever gone to begin with. For the umpteenth straight month, people are going to call for Orton to turn heel, and maybe it is time for that. Maybe it isn't. However, I can say this much.. Cena VS Orton is somewhat "fresh", as they haven't faced off in a one-on-one situation since October 25th, 2010. Of course, the odds of us getting a regular one-on-one match between them is slim, as it'll probably be Orton cashing in on an injured Cena.. or on Daniel Bryan immediately after Bryan wins the WWE Title at SummerSlam, which will cause the IWC to set fire to buildings across the country.
10. Here are my match ratings, for those who care about these kinds of things:
- Rollins & Reigns VS The Usos - 3.25 stars
- World Title Money In The Bank - 3.5 stars
- Axel VS Miz - 1.5 stars
- AJ VS Kaitlyn - 1.75 stars
- Jericho VS Ryback - 1.75 stars
- ADR VS Ziggler - 3 stars
- Cena VS Henry - 3 stars
- WWE Title Money In The Bank - 3.5 stars
If you're judging things solely on match quality, this is an event that I can recommend to you. If you haven't seen it, there are five matches that I rate at three stars or higher. There weren't any Match Of The Year candidates on the card, but the card was full of solid performances. Go ahead and give it a watch.
Factoid Of The Week That May Interest Only Me
I've had the first two seasons of Breaking Bad sitting on an external hard drive for a couple years now, but never got around to watching any of the episodes. I was getting tired of hearing people praising the show, so I finally decided to watch. I got through the first season in 24 hours, and I'm already hooked. I'll be starting the second season as soon as this column is posted, with the intention of getting through all 54 aired episodes before the new ones start airing on August 11th. It will require a lot of work, but I can make it happen.
It's interesting to watch Walter White slip into darkness, as things outside of his control continue to add up and drive him to depths the average man will never understand. As LoP Radio's own De and I discussed on Twitter the other night, that kind of character would be fun in wrestling, minus the cooking and selling of crystal meth, of course. Just take someone like a Kofi Kingston, who is a happy-go-lucky person naturally. Have one thing go wrong for him. Then another. Then another. We can watch as his character descends into madness, and feels forced to become a completely different person, taking roads he never thought he would take. Just throwing it out there.
Tweet Of The Week
I bought the Money In The Bank PPV because I enjoy watching people fight with ladders. If you're fighting someone with a ladder, I'm there.
I can't argue with that line of thinking. I think Home Depot and Lowe's are missing a great opportunity to make money by starting up their own Fight Club in the ladder department.
Who I Like Tonight
Tonight could be very interesting. Not only is it the official start of the road to the company's second biggest event of the year, but Raw comes to us from the Barclays Center in Brooklyn, New York. The last time WWE had an event in Brooklyn was the TLC pay-per-view back in December, and if you remember that night, the crowd was nuts all night long. Let's hope tonight is more of the same. As for some predictions, let's see..
- A very passionate promo from CM Punk, who had Paul Heyman turn on him last night and go on to bust his head wide open with a ladder, requiring 13 stitches/staples (depending on the report you're reading) to close him up. Heyman has been portrayed as Punk's "best friend" for a while now, so there should be plenty of fire in this promo from Punk.
- As a continuation of the last prediction, we should get Brock Lesnar to return. Not even much of a prediction, since it has been announced that Brock will be there. The Brooklyn crowd will pop for him, and we might as well set up Punk VS Lesnar for SummerSlam. Unless, of course, the plan is for Punk & Bryan VS Lesnar & Axel, in which case even more people will weep. Have Lesnar come out just as it looks like Punk is about to beat the stuffing out of Heyman, and we're good to go.
- One of the Usos VS Seth Rollins, one-on-one. Perhaps Jimmy, since Jey faced Rollins on Smackdown this past week. Just for fun, Jimmy should win, to further along the Usos/Shield storyline, helping to make the Usos look even more credible.
- I don't think Cody Rhodes is a full-fledged face yet, but I think we will get him questioning Damien Sandow's method of winning the match, only for Sandow to play up the "every man for himself" style to the match. I think the actual split of the group will be down the road.
- A tense face-to-face between John Cena and Randy Orton, where congratulations can be handed out to both men, but where Orton can remind Cena that he is more than willing to cash in on a fallen Cena to win the WWE Title again.
- I'd like to see another random attack by the Wyatt Family, helping them to put another person on the shelf, but I think we'll just get a promo from the group, either in the ring or in the form of vignettes again. No answers will be given about Kane, though. Just cryptic messages and talk.
No matter what happens, I hope Raw is entertaining.
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