Posted in: Fact or Fiction FACT or FICTION: Royal Rumblings, Nude Photos and More!
By SkittleZ
Jan 13, 2009 - 12:18:38 AM
What's up ladies and gents! It's a new year and another impromptu edition of LOP's Fact or Fiction ready to be unraveled. If you're avoiding the cold weather and looking for something to occupy your time, you came to the right place. On tap for today is two former Main Pagers, a current MPer, an LPW junkie and a disturbed teenager. And for you at home questioning my fetish for lethal combinations, lets just say I prefer to keep it hot and spicy. Ummmm... so I guess it'd be a good idea to explain the rules and format. I make up five outlandish statements and it's these five dudes' responsibility to answer 'FACT' or 'FICTION' in a swift manner. I'd like to take this time and apologize to LOP columnist Immunist for removing him from this column. His appearance in Fact or Fiction has been a long time coming but we can't reward individuals who fail random LOP drug tests. If he manages to clean up his act, I will definitely reserve a spot for young MuMu in next month's edition.
FACT or FICTION: For the first time in nearly a decade, a heel will win the upcoming Royal Rumble.
(Phantom Lord) First off let me just say it’s really nice to have come full circle in my Interweb career and it’s great to be back on LOP even if only for this. As for the Royal Rumble, I’ve really given up on trying to figure out who will win these damn things anymore. You have 20 guys from RAW/Smackdown, a couple of token picks from ECW and I’m guessing a surprise or two just for a cheap pop for the crowd. If I had to bet I would say Triple H would win just because the WWE if anything is predictable. But after last year when John Cena came back months before he was “supposed to”, I don’t know anymore. I’m going to say FICTION because I suspect they would do something like that and have BATISTA come back. If not him then I would imagine Triple H this year because there are plenty of rumors about Edge vs. Triple H for the WWE Title which I think would just be stupid. But that’s a whole other topic…
(sheepster) I'm liking the odds of the heels in this one. The belts are tied up with two of the biggest faces in the business. The only big face in this year's match is Triple H, and they seem to be setting things up for him to win, which is precisely why I don't think he will. They have to pick a heel sooner or later and there's not going to be a better year for a heel to win it. FACT.
(Sean_Taylor) That's an interesting question. Not since Vince McMahon won in 1999 (or Batista if you count him in 2005 since he hadn't fully turned yet) has a heel won the Royal Rumble. You could say that Randy Orton has the best chance to turn things around for the antagonists and you could factor in Jericho and Big Show could be runners up. Tack on that I doubt highly we'll see a repeat winner this year so that means Triple H, Undertaker, and Rey Mysterio is out. So unless there's a complete shocker or Jeff Hardy loses the belt before the Rumble and sneaks in, I'm going to have to go with FACT.
(Villiano 187) I am going to PUSH, because it depends on what you would consider Shawn Michaels to be. Yeah, I know. As of the posting of this column, he is not scheduled to appear in the Royal Rumble match. But you just watch. Over the next couple of weeks, Mr. Royal Rumble will somehow weasel his way into this match, maybe even at the PPV, and he’s going to win it.
(James_A) Yikes. Right off the bat I have to go with FICTION. So as it stands right now we have two face champions in John Cena and Jeff Hardy. While logic would tell us that to make up for the two face champions, a heel would have to win a Rumble, I don't think such is the case. Remember just two years ago at WM23 when we had two face champions? Who won the Rumble? A face! In fact, two guys who were faces were the last two in the Rumble! Face it! A face will win the Rumble whether it be rough and tumble! He'll get all the glory, end of story. Then he'll face a face at the end of time and space. And thus would end the chase of the championship contender race.
FACT or FICTION: Stephanie's return and involvement in the RAW brand will culminate at WrestleMania 25 with some type of heavily stipulated McMahon match.
(sheepster)FICTION. They've been there and done that. They've already had the father vs. daughter match, so I don't see where they can go unless they pull out the brother vs. sister match for complete control. And that's never going to happen because Stephanie will want to win. As a person who has a sister, I never want to lose at anything to my own sister. Especially not a fake wrestling match. There's no way Shane would lie down for Stephanie. The only other option left is mother vs. daughter and that's just wrong.
(Sean_Taylor) Funny enough, I got the FoF statements before it was announced that Vince was coming back. It's hard for me to think of why Stephanie seemed so nervous when Jericho told her that her dad was coming back. She hasn't really done anything. Certainly, Mania doesn't need a heavily-hyped McMahon match and there's no budding storyline or reason for one. But then, when has that ever stopped them from making a heavily-hyped McMahon match. I'll say FACT and hope it stems from the Million Dollar Mania set collapsing and we find out who was responsible.
(Villiano 187) I fucking hope not. Tits McGee bores the fuck out of me, as does her lame ass brother. Every time Shane comes out and does that queer ass skippy thing, I imagine someone coming out and spearing the fuck out of him. They need to change Steph’s theme up from Lil Kim to Barry Manilow, because she’s that fucking boring. Her giant tits can’t even save her segments anymore. Every time I see Vince walk out I fear he’s going to flop out his prosthetic ass again. Zero McMahons equals a fantastic show. Unfortunately, I will have to say FACT because the McMahons are egotistical sons of bitches.
(James_A) We haven't seen Vince McMahon in forever. This makes me very suspicious and I'm wondering if this sort of thing is worthy of a conspiracy theory of some sort. So since I don't have any evidence, I'll go with my gut and say MAYBE. What? I have to choose between Fact or Fiction? Fine fine fine. I'll go with FACT. Returning to my previous thought, we haven't seen Vince McMahon in forever. Since he usually shows up somewhere around WrestleMania time and this would be a perfect opportunity to revive that nearly forgotten "Who Killed/Attempted to Kill Vince McMahon" storyline. My theory: Rikishi. He did it for The Rock. But seriously, it would be quite sensible if the McMahon kids were inserted into this debacle.
(Phantom Lord) As sure as the sun will set in the night and rise in the morning, you can take this one to the bank and better believe it’s a FACT. First off this is WrestleMania 25 so you know in the back of Vince’s diluted mind he believes it should revolve around him some how. I don’t know how they will do it, but with Stephanie saying RAW is her “show” and now Vince is coming back in a couple of weeks it’s pretty much a given there will be some sort of McMahonOmania at WrestleMania 25 with I’m guessing control of RAW on the line. If that’s the case I hope Shane is involved and he wins because he’s the only McMahon with a damn clue.
FACT or FICTION: The JBL/Shawn Michaels program is the most appealing storyline currently running on WWE television.
(Sean_Taylor) I'd be hard pressed to think of a storyline that even comes close. Kane pissed off at Kelly Kelly? No. Randy Orton kicking people out of a stable that hasn't actually formed yet? No. Triple H and Mr. Kennedy making fun of Vickie and MVP every week? Funny but no. That thing on ECW? No.
Shawn Michaels being JBL's personal bitch is making for great television and it's proof positive that the best storylines come from the wrestlers themselves and not outsiders sitting behind a computer. There's raw emotion and the crowds are eating it up. Fans are begging HBK to kick JBL in the face and when he doesn't, it makes them steam. HBK has always been a great babyface and this feud further proves my point that JBL is the single best heel in the business today.
Most appealing storyline currently running on WWE television? Pure and simple FACT.
(Villiano 187) Have you seen John Morrison’s abdominal region? That is the most appealing thing on WWE television, so I have to go with FICTION. I’ve not really been a Shawn Michaels fan ever, but I don’t like to see him be the personal bitch of a guy who comes to the ring with a cow mooing in the background and not a lot of talent. Mic skills can only get you so far when you need a brozier and don’t have much ring talent like JBL.
(James_A) I once had a wart on my left hand. My point being that the JBL/HBK thing has been pretty good stuff lately. JBL gets even more heel heat than usual and my boy Jericho gets to look right in the process. That proposed angle by SkitZ just builds my hopes more and more for this angle. I'm rambling again, back to the question. Can you point out to me an angle more interesting? Cena/Jericho? Hardly. MVP's losing streak? Nope. Jeff Hardy/HHH/Edge? This one comes close but not quite. So FACT.
(Phantom Lord) This is overwhelmingly a FACT. JBL and Shawn are channeling some damn good old school wrestling right now. In the old days (and for some of you reading this right now that is before DX, Attitude, and N.W.O.) there would always be a gimmick match where if someone lost they would be someone’s servant for a month or so. Usually it was the hated bad guy having to work for loved good guy (like Jimmy Garvin having to work on The Von Erich Ranch). It would just lead to the bad guy beating up the good guy and more hate and blood shed between them. I am hoping that’s where this will go because JBL/HBK would be a pretty damn good match for WrestleMania 25. At the moment, Shawn having to swallow his pride and integrity for the sake of money is just great. As an added bonus I’m sure somewhere Bret Hart is smiling on some level seeing Shawn being humbled even in this form. So yeah it’s the best program they have going right now. Nothing else the WWE, TNA, ROH, or anyone else is doing even comes close.
(sheepster)FACT. But none of it is Michaels' doing. This one is all on Layfield. The man is a genius. He knows just how to play that sleazy kind of bad guy that you just love to hate. And using a fan favourite like that? That's incredibly despicable. No other storyline comes close. Triple H taking on the management? Seen it before. Randy Orton playing snakes and ladders with half the Raw roster? Yawn. Jeff Hardy getting into a crash? Awww, diddums.
FACT or FICTION: The nude photos of Vicky Guerrero being auctioned off on eBay are more stimulating than Maria's PLAYBOY pictorial.
(Villiano 187) Did we not expect more from Maria’s pictorial than what we got? It has to be one of the worst pictorials in not only WWE’s history with Playboy, but possibly one of the worst pictorials of all time for Playboy. I don’t care what Vickie’s body looks like, I can’t get over that ugly fucking face. Either she’s one hell of a cook, fantastic in the sack, or Eddie was really drunk when he married this one. Maria could be fully clothed in Playboy, and it would still be a fact that it would be more stimulating than anything Vickie Guerrero could ever do. FICTION.
(James_A)FACT FACT FACT FACT and FACT! No disrespect for Maria because I love miniboobs just as much as the next person, and trust me when I say a brotha' can't get enough of that ass! But Vickie Guerrero is the future! Have you seen those pictorials? They are HOT! Man, Vickie is just banging in those! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh! I would have bid on those things had my mom not searched my e-history. Boy that was an awkward conversation. For the longest time she explained to me the dangers of bestiality because she mistook Vickie for a cow.
(Phantom Lord) Oh where do I begin with this one. I like Vickie Guerrero. I think despite everything she has some how managed to become the biggest heel on Smackdown. The heat she draws is second to none. But this “nude pic scandal” was beyond stupid. Having said that I do actually find Vickie to be very attractive (she looks great for a 40 year old mother of three). But was it more stimulating then Maria’s Playboy? No it wasn’t so FICTION on that one. Maria’s pics weren’t the greatest but they were certainly better then Ashley’s and Christy Hemme’s (I love Christy, but her pics were horrible). Maria’s were way better then that God awful Torrie/Sable shoot that used more filters then I thought existed. Of course I hope in the future the only time I see the words Nude Pics and Vickie together are if they are of Victoria. Now if any diva in that company deserves the next Playboy spread and push it’s her. So WWE if you are reading, VICTORIA FOR PLAYBOY 09!!!
(sheepster) I'll admit, I had to do extensive research for this question. I had seen the Guerrero photos on WWE.com before they were taken down, but I hadn't seen the Maria photos. So I went in search of them and found them pretty quickly. I looked at them. I compared them to the Guerrero photos. I put the Guerrero photos down and looked at the Maria photos again. It was a close call. So close that I had to look at the Maria photos another 3 times, just to make absolutely sure. AS it turns out, the answer is FICTION. On my sixth and final look, I suddenly noticed that the Guerrero photos were covered with black boxes. No one gets stimulated by large black boxes. Maria wins.
(Sean_Taylor) Yeah, that's it. I just love Vickie's body and her shriveled up bulldog face keeps me awake at yearning for more. FICTION. Yeah, it was sarcasm. I saw the photos of Vickie on WWE.com before they took them down. Did anyone else notice that by the way the black boxes were positioned on those photos indicated that either Vickie stuffs her bra or they sag lower than Mae Young's at the 2000 Royal Rumble. Yeah re-watch that if you need to stay up sweating at night.
FACT or FICTION: Jeff Hardy will win the Money in the Bank Ladder Match and cash in his opportunity on the same night.
(James_A) I have to go with FICTION here. Is there any real reason to do that? It would seem like kind of a waste to me. Especially since the only reason for doing that last year was for the hope that Jeff would finally get to the top. Now that he's at the top it would seem kind of like a downgrade, no? The only other reason I could envision Hardy in the MitB match this year is if he's pulling off some massive spot. To me though, that isn't worth dragging him to the midcard only to shoot him to the main event again.
(Phantom Lord) I think this is FICTION. The rumors of Jeff vs. Christian are hinging on whether Christian has actually resigned or not. I would like to believe Jeff will walk into WrestleMania as either WWE Champion or facing the WWE Champion (probably Edge) but knowing the WWE they wouldn’t go for that for some reason. If Jeff is in the Money in the bank match, it would be fun to see him win but I don’t see them doing something like this. The last time there was an un-announced title match at a WrestleMania it was Hogan vs. Yokozuna and we know how well that worked out. But yeah that wouldn’t happen. They would want to milk who ever Jeff is going to challenge for a lot more then just a later in the night type deal.
(sheepster) Two years ago, Jeff Hardy entered the Royal Rumble at #14. No one who entered the Rumble at #14 has ever escaped the Rumble curse. The British Bulldog, Eddie Guerrero, Marty Jannetty, Doink the Clown, Joey Mercury, Diamond Dallas Page... all entered the Rumble at #14. And they've all stopped wrestling for some reason or another. It's only a matter of time before it gets to Jeff Hardy. I don't want to see it happen at all, but the history speaks for itself. This one is totally FICTION.
(Sean_Taylor)FICTION. Jeff Hardy vs Christian at Mania. I doubt highly that he'll even consider MITB. I think someone from the mid-card will pull out the MITB win this year. Let's just hope it works out better than Punk did last year.
(Villiano 187) I am conflicted, because what I want to see is not what the WWE would want to see. I remember Jeff Hardy in TNA drenched in glow paint shooting his finger guns, being the queer spot machine he is. I personally can’t stand the guy, and I think his ring work is totally predictable and he has a shitty work ethic in the ring. Most of his in ring work is half assed and I can’t stand the guy, but for some reason people like him, so I have to go with FACT on this. The McMahons never book to the tastes of the internet fan minus the CM Punk title push (CM Punk is totally over rated, btw), so expect this to go in Hardy’s favor.
Well this is where the train ride comes to an end, faggots. I hope you were satisfied with this half assed presentation because it took me a whopping twenty minutes to put together. Seriously though, these handful of guys are just a sample of what LOP has to offer to the masses. If you'd like to sign up and write columns or simply join the forums, what the hell are you waiting for!? Though if I can play favorites for a moment, you should definitely go check out the LOP Columns Forum and see what all the fuss is about. The quality and density of the CF these days is pretty fucking impressive if I do say so myself. If this column has sparked your interest or hit a nerve, then voice your opinion via the links below. We'll see you back here around the same time next month. Later homies!
