Posted in: Hustle Is Posting Right Now Hustle Is Posting Right Now: Volume 59 ("Boom Boom Boom" Edition)
By Hustle
Nov 25, 2009 - 9:45:08 AM
Good lookin out, Ro.
You a fool for this one, Noc.
"All that loud talkin, ho, you need to go and settle down.. 'fo your friend have to pick yo ass up off the ground.."
One of my "guilty pleasure" rappers, Project Pat, delivers this week's intro line. Sometimes in life, people step out of line, and when they do, you have to put them back in their place, by hook or by crook. There are a few people out here that need to be put back in their place soon. Buncha bastards. Anyway, welcome, one and all, to yet another edition of the column that has people joining with Team Hustle.. Hustle Is Posting Right Now. I just so happen to be the man whose living is so magnificent.. yes, you guessed it.. ya boy, Hustle, is back in the building. First and foremost, I want to apologize for my absence last week. I fully intended to be here, posting for the masses, but I ended up having not one.. but two.. surprise guests from out of town, and it took up a lot of my time all week long. Here I am, though.. here I am. How's everybody out there in the magical world of ReaderLand? Things on this end are just short of stupendous, if I may say so myself, and I just did. I know why you're all here, and, uh, I think it's about that time. Shall I proceed? (Yes, indeed.) Less dew eet!!
Before I even get this started, allow me to say that I think this is going to end up being a shorter column. I'm not 100% sure, though, because I'm freestyling this one, like usual, so there's no promises. Anyway, the column topic I've chosen this week is something that has become a well-discussed subject in the last month or so. People have been e-mailing me about this, asking me on AIM, asking me on Twitter, asking me on Facebook, etc. I apologize to LoP's very own Uncle Joe in advance, because this column is going to be about Kofi Kingston. He's smack dab in the middle of a meteoric rise up the WWE totem pole, taking him from a floundering midcarder who had never cut a promo and hadn't shown much personality outside of smiling a lot, to a "can't miss" main event-level prospect who has shown a propensity for stealing the moment. We've seen where he's come from, but where he's going is still up for debate. Since so many people are asking me, what better time than my column to share my thoughts on where I think this push is going to lead over the next few months? This is going to be an expansion of what I had to say in my last column about the booking for Kofi between now and WrestleMania 26.
In the "Wolves" column, I predicted that Team Kofi would get the victory at Survivor Series, and that, while it wouldn't surprise me to see Kofi eliminate Orton, I wasn't expecting it to happen. Unless you've been on vacation for the last few days, you'd already know that Team Kofi did win, and Kofi did eliminate Orton himself. Yes, I said I wouldn't be surprised, but I was totally surprised at just how good Kofi looked in eliminating both CM Punk and Randy Orton in a span of six seconds. Young Mr Kingston has had several "star-making" moments recently, but that may have been the clearest indication of the direction the company would like to take him.
On the heels of this week's episode of Raw, it looks like December's TLC pay-per-view will see Kofi Kingston and Randy Orton finally face each other in a one-on-one battle. The company has been doing a spectacular job in putting off the singles matchup, in an era where the "normal" thing to do is to rush matchups as quickly as possible, and then giving us that same matchup ad nauseam until people stop caring. Kofi looks better and better with every passing week, and Orton is putting in yeoman's work in helping him along. Orton continues to come up with the short end of the stick in this feud, and yet, people aren't screaming about him being squashed, so something must be going right. While this PPV is a "themed" event, I would imagine, seeing as it is their first match against each other in this feud, that it will be a regular singles match, and nothing involving tables, ladders, or chairs. Personally, I think that's for the best. They've built up more than enough intrigue to this point. They don't need gimmicks added to "spice" things up. Don't get me wrong.. I wouldn't complain, in the slightest, should any gimmicks be added to their match. I'm merely saying that it isn't required to make the match watchable. I like the contrast in styles that they bring to the dance.. Kofi with his "controlled frenzy" (fuck you, Michael Cole), and Randy with his ultra-methodical pace. Give them 15-20 minutes to work with, and I can just about guarantee you that they'll deliver an exciting match that might even end up being one of the better matches on the entire card. Orton needs to pick up the victory, by hook or by crook, though, to prevent the feud from reaching a ridiculous level of lopsidedness.
With the feud not having a definitive ending at TLC, that would take us on the road to the Royal Rumble, where things become quite interesting. Occasionally at the Royal Rumble event, you'll see wrestlers do double-duty by having a normal match during the show, as well as being an entrant in the Rumble itself. This year saw none of that. Kofi VS Orton would be a natural candidate to take place during the PPV, but they can't be taken out of the Rumble match, can they? I don't think so. They're both far too big in name-value to not participate in the Rumble. If I were in charge, I think you could actually get away with not having them face each other at the Rumble, and just have some interaction with each other in the Rumble match instead. Kofi could enter the Rumble in one of the first dozen or so spots, with Orton coming in a few spots later, and they'd electrify the crowd by immediately going after one another. Drag it out a little bit by having Kofi fight off Wrestler A and Wrestler B, while Orton can fight off Wrestler C and Wrestler D, and they can continue coming back to fight each other. I like the idea of having them both eliminated at the same time. For example, they could be brawling against the ropes, and someone such as Triple H or Big Show could sneak up and dump them both out. Simple, and it keeps their feud hot.
Elimination Chamber (the pay-per-view formerly known as No Way Out) presents a pretty easy scenario to figure out, in my opinion. Whether he comes out on top in the Orton feud or not, Kofi more than deserves a spot in the WWE Title Elimination Chamber, especially coming off of this year's show, where he was supposed to take part in the match, but was attacked beforehand by Edge. After the Rumble, Orton could demand to be placed in the Chamber so that he can take back his title, and the Guest Host (if they're still doing Guest Hosts at the time, and if not, whomever is chosen as the full-time Authority Figure on Raw) could place him in a qualifying match, which he'd win. Kofi, too, would enter and win his qualifying match. Throw in any combination of John Cena, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, The Miz, Sheamus, Jack Swagger, Big Show, Mark Henry, MVP, Ted DiBiase, and Cody Rhodes.. BAM.. main event booked. I wouldn't have either Kofi or Orton walk out of EC with the title, though. Why? To keep the feud going, obviously. Pay attention, will ya?
This takes us to "The Granddaddy Of Them All", WrestleMania 26. People have been asking me if this epic character development for Kofi could be leading to him actually main eventing the biggest show of the WWE year. Even as recently as a week or two, I would've immediately said "no", and I've been driving the Kingston Bandwagon from the very beginning. As of this very minute, though.. 12:39am on Wednesday, November 25th, 2009.. I'm not too sure. It could happen, but as I've laid out before your very eyes in this here column, I wouldn't book it that way. Every year at WrestleMania, there's a certain type of match that always gets a lot of hype. It involves eight (and sometimes six, depending on the year) wrestlers, and usually, just as many ladders. Of course, I'm referring to Money In The Bank. Putting Kofi in the match only makes about 47 different types of sense. I suppose I'd have him be the first person announced as being in the match (or, for the sake of argument, he could qualify to get in). This would cause Orton to flip, basically saying "If he's in the match, then I'm in the match, as well", and there you go. Kofi HAS to win this match, I would think. If the company is serious about pushing Kofi to the top, giving him a spotlight at the year's biggest event would be the perfect way of showcasing that.
I'm just guessing here, but I would imagine we'll be getting yet another Draft Lottery sometime in the immediate aftermath of WrestleMania. I think Kofi has more than earned his spot on the company's flagship show. Truthfully, it really depends on what they do to the rosters. Raw should be the show that leans towards the bigger "name" wrestlers, while Smackdown should be the show that leans towards the better in-ring performers. That's how it was earlier this year, and I enjoyed the differences very much. If that's the case again, Kofi would fit in on both shows, as he's being pushed towards being one of the bigger names, all while delivering some of the more entertaining performances. Again, though, I think he's earned his spot on the #1 show. From there and beyond, I think there are two big names who could very well have titles in their possession that Kofi could eventually cash his MitB shot in against, and that's John Cena and CM Punk. Cena, like him or not, is the company's measuring stick. If you're feuding with him, you're either already at the top of the industry, or someone sees that you're on your way there. Punk would be a fun feud for Kofi, as well, especially after their mini-match at Survivor Series. Very nice to have their history together brought up, even if it was in passing.
Now you know how I feel and in what direction I think things are going, but I want to know what you, my readers, think. Do you agree with me? Do you think Kofi is going to reach the top even quicker than I'm predicting? Do you think Kofi's push will fizzle out and nothing will come of it? Drop me a line in one of the usual dozen ways possible, and let me know. I'm really looking forward to some of your responses.
Hustle Highlight Of The Week: It was a relatively slow couple of weeks as far as this section goes. Not saying there weren't any good moments, but merely that there were several "solid" moments, without having a moment/match/promo that shook the foundation of the wrestling world. I suppose I'll have to go ahead and choose the moment that had me marking out the most, I suppose, and that would be when Shawn Michaels hit Triple H with a little Sweet Chin Music at the start of the WWE Title Triple Threat Match at Survivor Series. Even with the talk that one of the DX members would turn heel, the kick still caught me off-guard. I damn near had the same look on my face as John Cena did when it happened. I am a little disappointed that it didn't lead anywhere yet, but hey, it's still early. There's plenty of time for one of them (preferably Shawn Michaels) to turn heel.
Eh, who am I kidding? The HHotW goes to Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao for his absolute destruction of Miguel Cotto last weekend. I'm a big-time Pacquiao fan, but I thought that Cotto's size and power would be too much, and that he'd be able to chip away and chip away before finally picking up the victory sometime in the second half of the fight. I'm sorry for ever underestimating Pacman's speed and military sniper-like accuracy. Cotto started off looking decent enough, but as time went by, Pacquiao took over more and more, until the point where he was turning Cotto's face into hamburger meat. Absolutely incredible performance. If we actually get a Manny Pacquiao VS Floyd Mayweather match put together, I'll lose my mind. Boxing fans need it to happen (the fight, not me losing my mind). Boxing itself needs it to happen (again, the fight, not me losing my mind).
What Hustle Is Thankful For This Year: (in no particular order) Being alive for another sun up and sun down.. True friends.. The soliders that go out and put their lives on the line every single day for us regular folk.. Having my own computer again.. Being able to use said computer to deliver a column that I really enjoy and am passionate about.. Every one of you that allows me to continue writing those columns.. Korean BBQ.. Slaughterhouse.. Twitter (@HustleLOP).. Another year of staying out of the streets and out of jail.. John Cena-Kofi Kingston-Bryan Danielson-Samoa Joe-Nigel McGuinness (or Desmond Wolfe, if you prefer)-William Regal-Chris Jericho-Chris Hero-Homicide-Alex Shelley-Chris Sabin-Tyler Black-Dolph Ziggler.. Modern Warfare 2.. USB Flash Drives.. Living in paradise (although the cost of living here is insane).. and last, but not least.. The memory of loved ones who didn't make it through to celebrate another year. Whatever it is you're thankful for this year, ladies and gentlemen, I just want to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving.
Writer's Note: You've been waiting for it. I've been waiting for it. Well, the wait is almost over, kiddies. January 1st, 2010.. on this very site.. Believe The HIPE returns to your computer monitors and/or cell phones on a daily basis. With Monkey stepping down, the timing just felt right. The new year is as good a time as any for a new start. 365 columns in 365 days? We'll see, but let's work on getting beyond 27 straight like last time. We're only a few weeks away, so I need everyone to pray for me. I need all the help I can get. Lawdhavemercy.
What Hustle Is Listening To Right Now: "Wait Your Turn" by Rihanna.. "Wait Your Turn (Remix)" by Rihanna & Joell Ortiz.. "Hard" by Rihanna & Young Jeezy.. "Stupid In Love" by Rihanna.. "Russian Roulette" by Rihanna.. "Rude Boy" by Rihanna.. "Photographs" by Rihanna & will.i.am.. "Politics (Remix)" by Royce Da 5'9 & Cee-Lo.. "Bac Ya Boyz Down" by Freeway, Beanie Sigel, & Jakk Frost.. "I Go Off" by Beanie Sigel & 50 Cent.. "Doorman" by Clipse.. "Popular Demand (Popeye's)" by Clipse & Cam'ron.. "Player's Prayer" by Lloyd.. "Still Tippin" by Mike Jones, Slim Thug, & Paul Wall.. "Ghetto Blues" by II Tru & Layzie Bone.. "Searchin 4 Peace" by Poetic Hustlaz.. "Killing Fields" by Graveyard Shift.. "Rumors & War" by Graveyard Shift.. "Mo Murder" by Krayzie Bone.. "Ain't No Reason" by Ken Dawg.. "Thug Devotion" by Mo Thugs Family.. "No Pretender" by Mo Thugs Family.. "Family Scriptures" by Mo Thugs Family.. "Low Down" by Souljah Boy (no, not THAT Souljah Boy) & Krayzie Bone.. "All Bets On Ace" by Ace Hood (yup).. "Rollin" by Jackie Chain.. "Dick N Gum" by Snoop Dogg.. "Empire State Of Mind Part 2" by Alicia Keys.. "Morning Ride" by Fiji.. "What A Wonderful World/Somewhere Over The Rainbow" by Israel Kamakawiwo'ole
Yet another clip emptied. As usual, thank you to everyone that is riding with me again. Much mahalo, as they say out here. I'll be back next week with an interesting collabo with someone who you've seen appear here in the past. He's a bit of a Guru, let's just say that much. You'll just have to keep your peepers peepin for that, as well as my year-end wrap-up edition which will soon follow. Until then, I'm gonzo like the Muppet, nah'mean? From Ala Ilima Street, I bid you farewell. Aloha and Mahalo Nui Loa.
”I'm exceedin expectations, you barely meetin quota.. I give it to em straight, you cut it with baking soda..”
Hustle HIPRNFeedback@gmail.com
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