Posted in: The Classic Paper Review The Current Paper Review - Vol VI – Hell in a Cell 2009 + King of the Cell
By Mazza
Oct 6, 2009 - 9:11:12 AM
Romeo Done!
Vol VI – Hell in a Cell 2009
Welcome one and all to the Hell in a Cell edition of The Current Paper Review, I am your host, Mazza. It is funny how the time flies by between these tri-weekly pay per views. Breaking Point was a very interesting event with the main events competed under submission rules and now, three weeks later, we get to see the exact same match-ups in a cell. Although I do not mind having three Hell in a Cell matches on one card, I do think that they should be used to end a bitter feud. The timing could not be better for Legacy-DX and Orton-Cena but I do think this match has come a tad too early for CM Punk and The Undertaker. That said, I am still hopeful that they can pull off a good match and tell an interesting story.
ODE TO THE MENU
The Event: Hell in a Cell 2009
The Date: 4 October 2009
The Place: Prudential Center, Newark, New Jersey
Before we get underway with the review, here is a quick reminder of DaveyBoy’s review key.
<50: Ask for a refund for not only your money, but also your time. [F] (Armageddon '04)
50-54: Mediocre & disappointing. [D] (EG: No Way Out '07)
55-59: Average. [C] (EG: Unforgiven ‘08)
60-64: Worth A Watch. [C+] (EG: The Bash ‘09)
65-69: Good event that was worth the money. [B] (EG: SummerSlam '09)
70-74: Very good. [B+] (EG: Breaking Point '09)
75-79: Make sure you add this ppv to your video or dvd collection. [A] (EG: Royal Rumble '09)
80+: Make sure that the video or DVD is locked in a safe & cannot be erased. Memorable. [A+]
The Undertaker defeated CM Punk in 10:22 in a Hell in a Cell Match to win the World Heavyweight Championship
Well I would never have called this match opening the show. The placement on the card has me thinking that something odd may happen here. We start out with the champion trying to hit and run but the veteran of the cell match is wise to the tactics as Punk gets up close and personal with the steel in the early goings. A dropkick to the stairs and into Taker’s knees sees Punk get back in the running and he wastes no time on working over the challenger’s left knee with the crowd surprisingly split down the middle for a moment. Some back and forth action sees both men counter finisher attempts but Punk soon targets the knee once more before getting a chair from under the ring. A shot to the head gets a two count for the champion before Taker counters a high knee attempt into a Last Ride for a close call of his own. Punk then counters an Old School attempt but misses a chairshot. Taker follows up with a Chokeslam and a Tombstone for the victory.
What? Was that it? I was sitting there waiting for Teddy Long or somebody to come out to no avail. I have to say it was very anticlimactic. I understand that Taker may be a long way from 100% but if that is the case, why push him back into what was a solid main event scene so quickly. I am sure he could have got up to speed with a lesser feud with somebody like Kane. The match was okay while it lasted but certainly not HiaC worthy and it did not make Punk look particularly good either. It is a shame as the first few minutes looked quite promising. CPR Rating: 7
John Morrison defeated Dolph Ziggler in 15:43 to retain the Intercontinental Championship
Finally Morrison gets a PPV match and I look forward to seeing what he can pull off with Ziggler. The early goings see Ziggler come out on top of a couple of tie ups and we see some slow paced amateur action. The pace soon picks up though and we get to see some of Morrison’s sexy offence. The pattern then continues as Ziggler slows the action down once more with some tidy mat wrestling. The ebbing and flowing continues and we soon see the champion miss with Starship Pain. Dolph proceeds to get a number of two counts and he is confidently in control. A DDT sees Morrison get back into the match which is followed by a couple of nice sequences. Ziggler lands a beautiful bridging German Suplex and Running Fameasser for two counts. He then counters another Starship Pain attempt before Morrison in turn counters a Zig Zag before finally hitting his finisher to retain his title. This was a very solid match that was reminiscent of Christian and Regal’s encounter from Breaking Point. Ziggler’s mat skills complimented Morrison’s athleticism very nicely indeed and neither man looks too far off being ready for a main event push. My only criticism is that the action was sometimes a little slow in the early stages. CPR Rating: 8.5
Mickie James defeated Alicia Fox in 5:19 to retain the Divas Championship
I am not sure where Fox has come from to earn a PPV title match but at least the Divas can get on the card this time. Despite Mickie’s gut getting bigger than mine (okay, not quite but almost) she still shows off some nice athleticism and she controls the match with Fox looking a little out of her depth. The challenger then gets the chance to show off what she can do but that consists mainly of rest holds. She does manage a rather nice looking Northern Lights Suplex but Mickie soon picks up the win with a DDT. Not the worst Divas match ever and better than having Kane and Khali go at it again but certainly “meh” at best. CPR Rating: 5.5
Chris Jericho and The Big Show defeated Batista and Rey Mysterio in 13:43 to retain the Unified Tag Team Championship
There is hardly time to breathe after the end of the Divas match before this started. Jericho does not even get a mic before the match starts. We thankfully start out with Jericho and Mysterio as we get a reminder of their excellent feud earlier this year. Jericho is aggressive and Rey, as you would expect, uses his speed. Batista comes in and the challengers take control and cut the ring off to keep The Big Show out of the match. The big man eventually gets the tag but Mysterio decides to take on the challenge rather that tag in Batista. He gets in some kicks to the leg before being grounded with a big headbutt. Show goes on to dominate Rey and actually palms him back into the ring from the outside. Mysterio is soon in fully fledged face in peril mode but eventually makes the hot tag and Big Dave comes in like a house on fire.
A spinebuster to Jericho gets a two count before outside interference from Show allows Jericho to hit a Codebreaker. A slow cover gives Batista time to kick out and Show gets tagged in. Show hits a chokeslam but Rey comes in to break up the count. Batista eventually makes the tag following a failed Lionsault and we have the David versus Goliath match up again. This time Mysterio is impressive and we see a nice sequence where Show catches Jericho on the outside but gets caught by a spear from Batista. In the ring, Rey hits a 619 on Show but as he vaults off the top rope, he gets taken out with a knockout punch and the champions retain. This was certainly an all star tag team match and I think it lived up to its billing. There was always something interesting happening here and it had that feeling that it could have gone either way. All four men seemed to have great chemistry with each other and these pros put on a very good show. CPR Rating: 8
Randy Orton defeated John Cena in 21:25 in a Hell in a Cell Match to win the WWE Championship
Once again I was surprised to see the placement here and it looks like it will be DX and Legacy who will be closing the event. A lot of readers have thought I have been a bit harsh on the quality of these guys’ matches so I will be keeping an open mind going into this one. From the get go, Orton is trying to find a way out of the cell and as a result, suckers Cena in and takes control. Orton once again adopts his methodical pace and he uses the cell and ring steps to his advantage. Orton then tries to throw the steps into the ring and this almost backfires in hilarious fashion as they hit the top rope and bounce back towards him. He makes the save and makes a disparaging signal to the crowd who were laughing at him. About two minutes of standing around later, he attempts to DDT the champ onto the steps but Cena counters with a back drop. Cena gets on a role for a minute but after failing with an Attitude Adjustment, Randy finally lands the rope assisted DDT. He misses the RKO follow-up however and Cena lands his finisher but he can only get a two count. He then tries for an Attitude Adjustment from the second rope but Orton counters with an Electric Chair.
The pace slows right down again and Randy goes for a chair and lands measured jabs to Cena’s neck and mid-section. He then tries to hit a knee drop to Cena’s skull but the champ moves and locks in the STF. Orton gets to the ropes but the ref does not break the hold. Randy eventually counters in a move that sees the ref get knocked down. Cena locks in the hold once more and Orton taps but there is no ref to call the victory. The champ drags the ref back into the ring but gets hit with an RKO which brings a long two count. A frustrated Orton ties up Cena’s arms in the ropes and proceeds to choke the champ out. With Cena out, Orton waits and measures the champ to land with a punt and Randy is once again WWE champion. Well I certainly did not see that coming. I am not sure why Orton is champion once again and to be honest he totally shit on Cena here. I guess if one thing happened it is that all the weaknesses that had been highlighted in Orton over the last few months were well and truly put to bed here. As for the match, it was maybe a bit better than their last encounter but not much for me. The amount of time between moves at certain moments of the match was just ridiculous. I mean it took Orton at least five minutes just to walk to the back. They also hardly used the cell apart from in the early encounters and once more I feel disappointed with the Raw title scene. CPR Rating: 7
Drew McIntyre defeated R-Truth in 4:40
Not only does R-Truth get a PPV match but he also gets some decent promo time before hand. Whatever it was he said wasn’t very interesting but I think there may have been a “what’s up” in there somewhere. McIntyre comes down to some really generic SmackDown versus Raw type music but he does look the part. The Scot starts out with a side headlock but R-Truth soon uses his speedy flippy floppy offence. McIntyre uses a mixture of aggression and submission manoeuvres as the crowd are silent apart from an odd boring chant. McIntyre eventually gets the victory with an odd looking double underhook DDT. Well I think the fans were a little harsh here. Sure, it was not a match of the year contender but the action was pretty sound and it did the job of introducing McIntyre to the fans without taking up too much time. CPR Rating: 6
Rhodes and DiBiase congratulated Orton and say they will go out on the town after they beat DX. Randy says that Hell in a Cell will take its toll, win or lose. The youngsters brush off Orton saying they are ready and we see some dissention within Legacy. Nice segment.
Kofi Kingston defeated The Miz and Jack Swagger in 7:55 in a Triple Threat Match to retain the United States Championship
The champion is now suddenly being announced from Ghana, not sure what happened there. Kingston starts out battling both heels but the numbers game catches up as The Miz and Swagger start a momentary partnership. Miz soon breaks the unholy alliance with a kick to Swagger’s gut and he takes control of the match. The numbers disadvantage catches up to Miz also when Kingston hits a high crossbody from the top rope with Miz on Swagger’s shoulders. We get a few nice but not always smooth three-man sequences but the action becomes a little clustered. The finish comes when Swagger lands a gutwrench powerbomb on Miz but gets caught with Trouble in Paradise. Kingston pins the Miz to once again retain his title. We have had some very good Raw midcard matches in recent months but this was just a little too messy for me. There was some nice action but these men have all been a lot better in other matches this year. CPR Rating: 6.5
Triple H and Shawn Michaels defeated Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase in 18:01 in a Hell in a Cell Match
After the quality of the previous two encounters between these teams, it is only fitting they get the main event for Hell in a Cell. It seems odd that both of the two world title changes came before hand, but it also makes me think that something special could happen in this match. As DX are making their entrance, Legacy immediately attacks from behind. It is chaos, just as it was at Breaking Point as DX actually get the upper hand at ringside. Rhodes gets taken out with a double suplex onto the announce table before Ted and Hunter go out into the crowd. Cody and Shawn do the same and Rhodes takes out HBK’s knee with a chain before going to help DiBiase work over Triple H two-on-one on the entrance way. After a Cross-Rhodes to the Game, they turn their attention to Michaels and crush his leg in the cell door before locking themselves in the cell with Shawn. The referee calls for the bell but this is to START the match!
Shawn gets to his feet and realises the situation he is in but is soon taken down with a very stiff looking kick from Ted. Legacy continue to work over Michael’s knee as an extremely groggy Hunter tries to make his way to the cell. With Hunter locked out and frantically trying to find a way into the cell, Shawn finds some offence and lands Sweet Chin Music on DiBiase for a two count before being stopped with a chairshot from Rhodes. Hunter tries to break the lock with a chair to no avail as he is taunted by Legacy who continue to annihilate Michaels on the inside. Hunter walks to the back and while he is gone we get some great close ups of Legacy torturing and taunting HBK. He gets thrown into the cell, ring post and takes a dropkicked chair to the face. The crowd call for Hunter as Legacy lock in the Million Dollar Dream/Figure Four combination around the ring post that earned them victory at Breaking Point. Hunter then makes his return with some bolt cutters in hand and finally gets into the cell.
Super H unloads on both Legacy members and HBK eventually gets to his feet. Hunter nails DiBiase with a Pedigree on the floor and they remove him from the cell and lock the door. Turnabout is fair play as DX have a two-on-one advantage inside the cell. Hunter puts Cody’s neck in a chair and HBK hits an elbow from the top rope. Shawn looks for Sweet Chin Music but Triple H stops him and gets a sledgehammer from under the ring. Both members of DX tune up the band and Rhodes gets hit simultaneously with Sweet Chin Music and a blow from the sledgehammer. Michaels makes the cover and DX are victorious. As the cell goes up, Ted checks on Cody but he also tastes some Sweet Chin Music before DX celebrate over Legacy’s fallen bodies. Last time out I gave these teams a 9.5 rating but I can honestly not find anywhere where I can take anything away from them this time around. As a result, Degeneration X versus Legacy from Hell in a Cell earns the Current Paper Review’s first perfect rating. These guys once again put on a masterpiece of a brawl with faultless psychology. The match before the match was excellent, the two-on-one beating of HBK was perfectly executed and the good guys eventually getting the upper hand just made it right. Rhodes and DiBiase have fought this feud as a team but they have been elevated to a point where they could be believable main eventers tomorrow. Three phenomenal pay per view tag team matches have put Legacy and DX ahead of Mysterio and Jericho for me now as feud of the year. CPR Rating: 10
HELL IN A CELL CPR RATING (58.5/80) = 73
Overall, Hell in a Cell scored a B+ on the DaveyBoy Grade Scale which means the event was very good and scored the same as Breaking Point. The event did not feel quite as rounded as last month’s outing to me. I guess a lot of the matches were of a similar quality and nothing was quite as bad here as Kane and Khali. The ordering of the matches tonight was very odd for this event. Despite DX and Legacy being my match of the night, it was still strange that it was the last match considering we had two world titles change hands. It has been reported that the reason for Punk losing so convincingly and in the first match is that he is in the doghouse over comments he made to Taker whilst overseas. I have to say that it is a poor move on WWE’s part after doing such a fine job building Punk and this feud up. It seems like he made a throwaway comment and as a result, the fans get stiffed and we now have a man fighting injuries leading the show. Orton-Cena once again failed to grab my imagination but Morrison and Ziggler was definitely a bright spot as both young talents came out looking strong.
KING OF THE CELL
Since Shawn Michaels and Undertaker battled it out in the first Hell in a Cell Match at In Bad Blood 1997, we have seen a number of matches inside the structure, 17 to be exact. However there are two men that have battled it out in the cell more than others and essentially made the match their own. In fact, the Orton-Cena encounter was the first cell match that featured neither of these superstars. The Undertaker has entered 9 times, emerging victorious on 5 occasions and getting screwed in a couple of the others (see SkittleZ and Glacier’s column for more details). Triple H has been in 8 cell matches, registering 6 victories and just one solitary one-on-one loss. What I would like to know though is which one of these two legends deserves the title of King of the Cell.
I think that last night, it is Hunter who took the upper hand despite not entering the structure until late in the match but there is a long history to take into consideration. There are two common denominators in this equation, Batista and Mick Foley. The most infamous of all cell matches took place between Taker and Mankind at King of the Ring 1998 and will be remembered for the sick bumps that Foley took in this battle. Although it was a memorable match, it did not quite live up to the Triple H-Cactus Jack battle at No Way Out 2000 which for me was the day that Hunter showed the world he would be in the main event for a very long time. Both men have also had strong matches against Batista. His match with Hunter was at Vengeance 2005 and was the last in a trilogy of matches between the two that really put Big Dave on the map. This was also Hunter’s only one-on-one cell defeat. Batista and Taker were putting on quite a show at Survivor Series 2007 before a returning Edge disguised as a cameraman gifted Dave the victory.
Both men however have had stinkers in the demonic structure too. Although his effort against Punk was not the best of his career, it was far from the worst. That title has to go to the WrestleMania 15 match against The Big Bossman. It really was a lacklustre cell match and is probably the reason we have not seen the cell make another appearance at the “Granddaddy of them all” in the 10 years since. Who could forget the DX versus The McMahons and Big Show cell from Unforgiven 2006? If you are lucky you will have forgotten this match but I can assure you that it sucked. Hunter has however had strong matches against Kevin Nash, Chris Jericho and Shawn Michaels in a cell where as the Undertaker has excelled in battles with Edge, Randy Orton and Brock Lesnar.
Main event status of upcoming stars can be consolidated in the cell and both men have also done very well in putting youngsters over. Orton and Lesnar were both made to look extremely impressive in their matches with The Deadman whilst Hunter made Batista look like $1,000,000. The first Hell in a Cell themed PPV will be remembered for DX defeating Legacy and maybe the cell made two new stars in Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase. There was of course one other showcase match which saw Triple H and Undertaker in the cell at the same time. This was the Armageddon 2000 6-man Hell in a Cell match, won by Kurt Angle which also included Rikishi, Steve Austin and The Rock. This match will be remembered for Taker chokeslamming Rikishi off the top of the cell (and then having a rest up there for the rest of the match) and Hunter was always in the thick of the action. Well, I have not really found an answer to who is the King of the Cell by looking at this but there is one sure fire way to find out.
There is currently a poll up in the forums which shows that LOP readers would like to see either Chris Jericho or John Cena as the next man to have a go at ending Taker’s WrestleMania streak. I, however, would love to see Triple H and Undertaker have one final feud, culminating in a Hell in a Cell match at WrestleMania 26. Much like Taker-Michaels last year, it seems like it has been forever since The Game and The Deadman have had a major program together. Their battle as the final two in the SmackDown elimination chamber at No Way Out this year was certainly tantalising and I am sure that these two legends could put on one hell of a show in Arizona. Their previous WrestleMania encounter at 17 was a very strong match and they fought all over the arena. Sure, neither man is as fresh as they were back then but history has proven that they can still pull off a big match on a big stage. Obviously I do not think the streak should be taken here, despite being a huge Hunter mark but like last year’s match, the spectacle will be far more important than the result. The odds of the match happening are not great and it is even less likely to take place in a cell. There is one more unlikely thing that could make the match even better and that would be Mick Foley serving as a guest referee. Oh well, I guess I can only dream.
THE ROAD TO BRAGGING RIGHTS
So what is our reward for sitting through what we thought would be the end of the Cena-Orton feud? A 60 Minute Ironman Match for Bragging Rights. Guys, if you don’t see a review after the next event, you will know that this is because I have died of boredom watching Randy Orton take 5 to 7 minutes between each move. I really, really hope that the Legacy break up starts very soon so they can go in a different direction. It seems as if the final match on the card will see Smackdown’s winners take on Raw’s winners in a tag team match which could really sow some interesting seeds for Survivor Series.
The rest of the card could well be shaken up a bit from the same old same old we have been experiencing lately. It is rumoured that a program between Undertaker and Batista will be starting on SmackDown with Punk in the doghouse which could be anything from good to disastrous. Punk may get into a feud with Mysterio if that is the case, particularly if they decide to use Rey’s wellness policy violation as a catalyst. I would also think that Morrison and Ziggler have done enough to go at it once again. I think Dolph has shown more than enough in his matches with Morrison and Mysterio to be given a run with the IC title and maybe Morrison can step up a level to challenge the big boys sometime soon.
With Smackdown seeming very face-heavy at the moment, it may be time to end JeriShow’s tag team reign and have that Jericho-Taker feud everyone wants to see. I would love to see them have a mini-feud with DX but the tag team titles will not really do anything for Shawn and Hunter. Maybe they could win them and hotshot them back to Legacy or we may even see a Triple Threat Tag match for the titles.
With The Miz winning the US title on Raw last night, I would guess that we may see some sort of rematch at Bragging Rights. There are a lot of people just seemingly shooting the breeze in the Raw midcard right now including Kingston, Swagger, MVP and Mark Henry so it will be interesting to see where they go with these guys. Finally I would not be surprised to see ECW miss out on a match if they are going for the SmackDown versus Raw theme but I still hope we get a Shelton Benjamin-Christian program sometime down the line.
So we have come to the end of another edition of The Current Paper Review. Feedback, as always, will be much appreciated and you can drop me an email here or pop by my feedback thread in the forums. I will be back in three weeks for Bragging Rights but in the meantime, here are some of the best columns doing the rounds in the columns forum.
Quote Me Happy by Freeman - This is the second part in a look at the current crop of Brits in the WWE
Friday Night Delight by GLS - One of the best in the forums returns with a look at ways to improve WWE’s PPV buy rates
